# You have the power to permanently eliminate any Christmas song... **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [November 25, 2010, 12:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-have-the-power-to-permanently-eliminate-any-christmas-song/561836 "2010-11-25T00:46:24Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 5
**Author:** ![Cyberhwk](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/7993a0/32.png) [@Cyberhwk](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cyberhwk)\ **Post date:** [November 27, 2010, 6:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-have-the-power-to-permanently-eliminate-any-christmas-song/561836/81 "2010-11-27T06:21:04Z")
**Silver Bells**. No question. ---
**Author:** ![Ura-Maru](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/51bf81/32.png) [@Ura-Maru](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ura-Maru)\ **Post date:** [November 27, 2010, 9:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-have-the-power-to-permanently-eliminate-any-christmas-song/561836/82 "2010-11-27T09:38:33Z")
Another vote for ‘the Christmas Shoes.’ It’s like an illiterate fanfic-writers attempt at slash fiction pairing Annoying Christmas Music and Whiny 70s Ballads. Does hate for 12 Days apply to the [Straight No Chaser version](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2Fe11OlMiz8)? Because that would be sad. – Three Kings, though? I’ve always considered that, musically, the best of the radio X-mas cannon. With the possible exception of God Rest Ye Merry Gentleman. (SnC has awesome versions of each, as well) Or some of the more badass versions of the Carol of the Bells. ---
**Author:** ![BigT](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bigt/32/12044_2.png) [@BigT](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BigT)\ **Post date:** [November 27, 2010, 10:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-have-the-power-to-permanently-eliminate-any-christmas-song/561836/83 "2010-11-27T10:00:21Z")
> [@jackdavinci](#): > > Barking dogs Jingle Bells I believe that’s what "Bark Bark Bark, Bark Bark Bark refers to above. I’m actually a little sad about most of these songs. So far it’s all been songs that I definitely want to keep, or songs I’ve never heard, and don’t want to get in my head if they are really so bad. At least I won’t be opening that thread where I show off interesting versions of Christmas songs. By the time y’all are through, there won’t be any. ☹ 😃 ---
**Author:** ![salinqmind](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/3ec8ea/32.png) [@salinqmind](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/salinqmind)\ **Post date:** [November 27, 2010, 2:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-have-the-power-to-permanently-eliminate-any-christmas-song/561836/84 "2010-11-27T14:08:37Z")
Isn’t there already a thread, Christmas songs with a twist? ---
**Author:** ![panache45](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/panache45/32/64_2.png) [@panache45](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/panache45)\ **Post date:** [November 27, 2010, 4:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-have-the-power-to-permanently-eliminate-any-christmas-song/561836/85 "2010-11-27T16:33:42Z")
> [@bup](#): > > _ **Christmas Shoes** _. All joking aside, _ **Christmas Shoe** _s. > > I’m a huge believer in preserving all artistic endeavors - probably from that time the Nazis burned all those books - but you give me a button that eradicates that song forever and ever and I’m pushing it without hesitation. You’ll have to fight many of us for the pleasure of pushing that button. I’ve always suspected that, at the end of the song, the kid takes the money and runs out of the store to buy drugs. ---
**Author:** ![AHunter3](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ahunter3/32/368_2.png) [@AHunter3](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AHunter3)\ **Post date:** [November 27, 2010, 4:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-have-the-power-to-permanently-eliminate-any-christmas-song/561836/86 "2010-11-27T16:38:01Z")
Frostie, Jingle Bells, and Rudolph. …jing, jing, jing, jing, jing, jing, jing, jing, jing, jing, jing, jing, jing, jing, _SPLAT_ ---
**Author:** ![Invisible\_Chimp](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/f05b48/32.png) [@Invisible\_Chimp](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Invisible_Chimp)\ **Post date:** [November 27, 2010, 5:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-have-the-power-to-permanently-eliminate-any-christmas-song/561836/87 "2010-11-27T17:14:49Z")
Jingle Bell Rock ---
**Author:** ![Pai325](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/c68b51/32.png) [@Pai325](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Pai325)\ **Post date:** [November 27, 2010, 5:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-have-the-power-to-permanently-eliminate-any-christmas-song/561836/88 "2010-11-27T17:23:13Z")
I have two students who love Christmas Shoes. I keep asking them why the kid isn’t in the hospital with his mother, or why he thinks Jesus cares about shoes, or why he doesn’t buy her doughnuts or something instead, because if I am dying all my worries about saturated fat will disappear, but they just tell me how moving it is. I tell them it moves me right to the bathroom where I get sick. ---
**Author:** ![PunditLisa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/4af34b/32.png) [@PunditLisa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PunditLisa)\ **Post date:** [November 27, 2010, 5:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-have-the-power-to-permanently-eliminate-any-christmas-song/561836/89 "2010-11-27T17:48:28Z")
Christmas Shoes, for sure. ---
**Author:** ![StuffLikeThatThere](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/bc8723/32.png) [@StuffLikeThatThere](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/StuffLikeThatThere)\ **Post date:** [November 27, 2010, 6:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-have-the-power-to-permanently-eliminate-any-christmas-song/561836/90 "2010-11-27T18:29:38Z")
Christmas Shoes. I know it’s been said again and again, but it bears repeating. It is vomitous. ---
**Author:** ![kath94](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/67e7ee/32.png) [@kath94](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kath94)\ **Post date:** [November 27, 2010, 7:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-have-the-power-to-permanently-eliminate-any-christmas-song/561836/91 "2010-11-27T19:39:38Z")
All good suggestions above. My husband refers to “The Little Drummer Boy” as “that rumpy-pumpy song,” which makes it tolerable, at least. Waaaay back in the day when I worked at a movie theater (and I’m really dating myself here) we had intermission music that was on 8-track. I brought in my Chipmunk Christmas 8-track that played in the auditorium where Bambi was showing. (That was back when Disney brought out their theatrical releases every 7 years.) I think it was January 2 when the projectionist slammed it on the concession stand counter & told me that he NEVER wanted to see or hear it again. It was only because it was my personal property that he didn’t tear it to shreds, I think. 🙂 My choice to obliterate for all eternity? Andy Williams’ “The Holiday Season.” [Totally stupidest lyrics **ever**.](http://www.leoslyrics.com/listlyrics.php?hid=wXnsEjSlfQk%3D) sample: It’s the holiday season With the whoop-de-do and hickory dock And don’t forget to hang up your sock . . . ---
**Author:** ![a35362](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/3da27b/32.png) [@a35362](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/a35362)\ **Post date:** [November 27, 2010, 9:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-have-the-power-to-permanently-eliminate-any-christmas-song/561836/92 "2010-11-27T21:47:05Z")
Actually I _like_ most Christmas songs in themselves. It’s just hearing them over and over and over again that makes them intolerable, like, I don’t know, having nothing to eat but sweet stuff every day for breakfast, lunch and dinner. Fun for a while but pretty soon you want some bread and meat and vegetables. Having said that, “Grandma Got Run Over by a Reindeer” is my most unbearable Christmas song, although I haven’t heard the “Christmas Shoes” song. If it’s anything like that “Butterfly Kisses” song, I could probably learn to filter out the lyrics. ---
**Author:** ![salinqmind](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/3ec8ea/32.png) [@salinqmind](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/salinqmind)\ **Post date:** [November 27, 2010, 9:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-have-the-power-to-permanently-eliminate-any-christmas-song/561836/93 "2010-11-27T21:55:57Z")
> [@DCnDC](#): > > I just want people to stop making “Christmas Albums” altogether. I mean seriously, do you _ **really** _ think you’ve got a unique twist on the same dozen fuckin’ songs that 1000 other artists have done already?! Because they’re money grubbers. It’s never enough for them to sell millions of albums, they have to crank out a “Christmas Album”. Then Entertain Us Weakly flogs it in the December issues, and millions of sheep buy it to add to their idols’ coffers. Like Mariah Carey, as if that sow needs even more money. ---
**Author:** ![Invisible\_Chimp](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/f05b48/32.png) [@Invisible\_Chimp](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Invisible_Chimp)\ **Post date:** [November 27, 2010, 10:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-have-the-power-to-permanently-eliminate-any-christmas-song/561836/94 "2010-11-27T22:56:49Z")
I think I’ve only heard Christmas Shoes once. I’ve successfully avoided it since. Some people in this thread have claimed total ignorance of the song. Where are people hearing it so much that it is inspiring so much hate? ---
**Author:** ![BlankSlate](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/blankslate/32/80_2.png) [@BlankSlate](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BlankSlate)\ **Post date:** [November 27, 2010, 11:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-have-the-power-to-permanently-eliminate-any-christmas-song/561836/95 "2010-11-27T23:27:40Z")
The most offensive has yet to be mentioned: _Do They Know it’s Christmas._ ---
**Author:** ![kath94](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/67e7ee/32.png) [@kath94](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kath94)\ **Post date:** [November 27, 2010, 11:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-have-the-power-to-permanently-eliminate-any-christmas-song/561836/96 "2010-11-27T23:50:41Z")
> [@BlankSlate](#): > > The most offensive has yet to be mentioned: _Do They Know it’s Christmas._ I agree. No, they don’t effing know it’s Christmas 'cause the majority of them are Muslim. ---
**Author:** ![StGermain](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/stgermain/32/2868_2.png) [@StGermain](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/StGermain)\ **Post date:** [November 28, 2010, 12:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-have-the-power-to-permanently-eliminate-any-christmas-song/561836/97 "2010-11-28T00:49:21Z")
Porky Pig’s _Blue Christmas_. StG ---
**Author:** ![a35362](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/3da27b/32.png) [@a35362](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/a35362)\ **Post date:** [November 28, 2010, 12:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-have-the-power-to-permanently-eliminate-any-christmas-song/561836/98 "2010-11-28T00:55:35Z")
The _best_ Christmas song, of course, hands down, no argument, is Nat King Cole singing The Christmas Song: “Chestnuts roasting on an open fire…” And Judy Garland singing “Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas” is always good for a tear or two. And that instrumental piece they use in the Charlie Brown Christmas special is a good The Christmas Season Has Arrived theme. ---
**Author:** ![Trepa\_Mayfield](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/edb3f5/32.png) [@Trepa\_Mayfield](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Trepa_Mayfield)\ **Post date:** [November 28, 2010, 1:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-have-the-power-to-permanently-eliminate-any-christmas-song/561836/99 "2010-11-28T01:54:26Z")
Not one person has yet mentioned Last Christmas. I suspect that those votes are being siphoned off into the Christmas Shoes pile (which would be my choice as well). ---
**Author:** ![Stranger\_On\_A\_Train](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/13edae/32.png) [@Stranger\_On\_A\_Train](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Stranger_On_A_Train)\ **Post date:** [November 28, 2010, 3:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-have-the-power-to-permanently-eliminate-any-christmas-song/561836/100 "2010-11-28T03:51:30Z")
I hate all Christmas songs with equal fever, but the one that drives me really insane is “Do You Know How Christmas Trees Are Grown?” by Nina (Baroness van Pallandt, of the Danish singing duo Nina & Frederik) which was featured in the Bond film _On Her Majesty’s Secret Service_. In the film, this nausea-inducing song is played over a scene in which Bond is in a festival in a small alpine skating village hopelessly trying to escape from the ever-tightening noose of Bloefeld’s henchmen. It is a perfect use of this song, but outside of this context it is one of the singularly most irritating set of lyrics ever set to music. “It’s the Most Wonderful Time of the Year” and “Feliz Navidad” take runner up position. In general, I could do without the songs, and indeed, the holiday. If it weren’t for _Die Hard_ and _Kiss Kiss Bang Bang_, I could do without any reference to Christmas entirely. Stranger [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-have-the-power-to-permanently-eliminate-any-christmas-song/561836.md?page=4) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-have-the-power-to-permanently-eliminate-any-christmas-song/561836.md?page=6)