# You have the power to permanently eliminate any Christmas song... **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [November 25, 2010, 12:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-have-the-power-to-permanently-eliminate-any-christmas-song/561836 "2010-11-25T00:46:24Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 8
**Author:** ![Siam\_Sam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/d78d45/32.png) [@Siam\_Sam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Siam_Sam)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2010, 2:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-have-the-power-to-permanently-eliminate-any-christmas-song/561836/141 "2010-12-03T02:15:31Z")
> [@pancakes3](#): > > 3 pages, 122 posts, and the only mention of “all i want for christmas is my two front teeth” came from thailand? > [@Larry\_Mudd](#): > > Didn’t it pretty much go away on its own? I wish. I wish. Myself, I don’t think I’ve ever heard _Christmas Shoes_. Is this a new one? I think I’ll not rush to find it. ---
**Author:** ![FalconFinder](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/51bf81/32.png) [@FalconFinder](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FalconFinder)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2010, 4:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-have-the-power-to-permanently-eliminate-any-christmas-song/561836/142 "2010-12-03T04:04:56Z")
“Let It Snow” MUST GO. Especially because all the insanely chipper people who love snow have to sing it all winter long. I combat this with a T-shirt with “Let it Melt” written on in three times. Generally I don’t mind Christmas songs – ON Christmas. But when they start playing them around Halloween, I’m ready to torch them all, except the parodies, which I don’t hear unless I play them. It’s the only way to stay sane during the holidays. ---
**Author:** ![running\_coach](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/running_coach/32/15836_2.png) [@running\_coach](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/running_coach)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2010, 4:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-have-the-power-to-permanently-eliminate-any-christmas-song/561836/143 "2010-12-03T04:08:05Z")
> [@Siam\_Sam](#): > > I wish. I wish. > > Myself, I don’t think I’ve ever heard _Christmas Shoes_. Is this a new one? I think I’ll not rush to find it. DO NOT look for the song. If you value your sanity, DO NOT look for this song. You DO NOT need to experience THAT SONG. ---
**Author:** ![Siam\_Sam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/d78d45/32.png) [@Siam\_Sam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Siam_Sam)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2010, 4:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-have-the-power-to-permanently-eliminate-any-christmas-song/561836/144 "2010-12-03T04:36:46Z")
> [@runner pat](#): > > DO NOT look for the song. If you value your sanity, DO NOT look for this song. > You DO NOT need to experience THAT SONG. Too late. Found it [here on YouTube](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VNsvE33pRSw). Although my ears fell off and my eyeballs started bleeding, I still think _All I Want for Christmas Is My Two Front Teeth_ wins it. ---
**Author:** ![Sunspace](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sunspace/32/1250_2.png) [@Sunspace](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sunspace)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2010, 4:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-have-the-power-to-permanently-eliminate-any-christmas-song/561836/145 "2010-12-03T04:55:03Z")
> [@Locrian](#): > > Besides ALL of them, and Christmas Shoes, the absolute WORST to me is that stupid Waitresses song “Christmas Wrapping”! I like that song. It’s the smooth 'n smarmy ones that make me want to barf… ---
**Author:** ![miss\_elizabeth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/838e76/32.png) [@miss\_elizabeth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/miss_elizabeth)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2010, 5:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-have-the-power-to-permanently-eliminate-any-christmas-song/561836/146 "2010-12-03T05:05:43Z")
I had never heard Christmas Shoes, so I had to look it up to see how bad it really was. I hate you all. ---
**Author:** ![Siam\_Sam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/d78d45/32.png) [@Siam\_Sam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Siam_Sam)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2010, 5:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-have-the-power-to-permanently-eliminate-any-christmas-song/561836/147 "2010-12-03T05:26:12Z")
Time to bring out the big guns: [All I Want for Christmas Is My Two Front Teeth](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_1FAbCzshoc). ---
**Author:** ![iamnotbatman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/858c86/32.png) [@iamnotbatman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/iamnotbatman)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2010, 5:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-have-the-power-to-permanently-eliminate-any-christmas-song/561836/148 "2010-12-03T05:30:28Z")
> [@fluiddruid](#): > > While it is indeed horrible, I raise you **Jingle Bell Rock**. I raise you, err… never mind. Can’t top that. ETA: you guys are factoring in how often the song is played, right? ---
**Author:** ![Sam\_A.Robrin](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sam_a.robrin/32/14497_2.png) [@Sam\_A.Robrin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sam_A.Robrin)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2010, 5:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-have-the-power-to-permanently-eliminate-any-christmas-song/561836/149 "2010-12-03T05:47:48Z")
> [@The\_Peyote\_Coyote](#): > > If I ruled the world, no one would ever hear “Grandma Got run Over by a Reindeer” again. I loathe that song What annoys me about that one is that there’s not one even mildly comic line in the entire, supposed-to-be-funny song–unless you find something inherently hilarious about old people. ---
**Author:** ![Sam\_A.Robrin](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sam_a.robrin/32/14497_2.png) [@Sam\_A.Robrin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sam_A.Robrin)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2010, 5:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-have-the-power-to-permanently-eliminate-any-christmas-song/561836/150 "2010-12-03T05:50:35Z")
> [@ralph124c](#): > > Has anyone ever been able to work zombies into a Christmas story? What did you think the Ghosts of Christmas Past, Present, and Yet to Be were…? ---
**Author:** ![Sam\_A.Robrin](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sam_a.robrin/32/14497_2.png) [@Sam\_A.Robrin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sam_A.Robrin)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2010, 5:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-have-the-power-to-permanently-eliminate-any-christmas-song/561836/151 "2010-12-03T05:57:08Z")
> [@ralph124c](#): > > Has anyone ever been able to work zombies into a Christmas story? PS: You know the rendition of “O Holy Night” I posted above? Go listen to that first. If you can. Then this [http://zombiescomic.com/2006/12/09/152-holy-night](http://zombiescomic.com/2006/12/09/152-holy-night) will answer your question… ---
**Author:** ![Darth\_Nader](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ad7895/32.png) [@Darth\_Nader](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Darth_Nader)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2010, 6:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-have-the-power-to-permanently-eliminate-any-christmas-song/561836/152 "2010-12-03T06:55:27Z")
> [@drastic\_quench](#): > > Wonderful Christmastime by Paul McCartney > > Just for that fucking synthesizer. The story goes he just got it, and basically locked himself in a studio with that synth and big bag of weed. Wonderful Christmastime was the result. This. And this list of cover versions: ``` * Martin Sheen, John Spencer, and Stockard Channing covered the song on the NBC Celebrity Christmas album in 2000. * Barenaked Ladies has a short synthesized instrumental cover on their 2004 album Barenaked for the Holidays. * De La Soul sampled "Wonderful Christmastime" on the track "Simply" from their album AOI: Bionix. * Jump5 covered and remixed the song for their Christmas album All The Joy In The World. * Earthsuit covered the song for Happy Christmas Vol. 3. * Hilary Duff did a cover of this song on her Christmas album Santa Claus Lane. * Tom Mcrae contributed a cover of this song on a various artists album called Maybe This Christmas Tree. * Jars of Clay recorded a cover on their 2007 release, Christmas Songs. * Demi Lovato did a cover on the 2008 All Wrapped Up! album. * Irene Grandi covered the song for her 2008 Christmas album Canzoni per Natale. * Cale Parks covered the song for the compilation Suburban Sprawl Holiday Sampler 2008. * Bonnie Pink covered the song on her mini-album Chain, released in 2008. * Peter Serafinowicz did a parody of it called "Sexual Christmas Time" in episode 6 of The Peter Serafinowicz Show. * Family Force 5 covered the song on their 2009 Christmas album Family Force 5 Christmas Pageant. * Overboard covered the song in their 2008 holiday album, Tidings. * Beatallica covered the song on their 2009 album Winter Plunderband. * Rahsaan Patterson covered this song on his 2008 album The Ultimate Gift. * Helix covered the song on their 2008 Christmas album A Heavy Mental Christmas. * The Venture Bros. co-creators Jackson Publick and Doc Hammer released a version of the song, performed as the characters 21 and 24, for the website Quick Stop Entertainment as part of the 2008 holiday season. ``` If only I had a time machine in addition to this gallon of kerosene and box of matches… ---
**Author:** ![elfkin477](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/a9a28c/32.png) [@elfkin477](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elfkin477)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2010, 7:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-have-the-power-to-permanently-eliminate-any-christmas-song/561836/153 "2010-12-03T07:01:55Z")
> [@Joey\_P](#): > > Baby, it’s cold outside. Also known as “The Date Rape Christmas Song.” No really, google “date rape christmas” and see if you find anything besides references to this song. Me, I don’t like Suzy Snowflake. ---
**Author:** ![PhilJustPhil](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/b9e5f3/32.png) [@PhilJustPhil](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PhilJustPhil)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2010, 10:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-have-the-power-to-permanently-eliminate-any-christmas-song/561836/154 "2010-12-03T10:02:29Z")
> [@Voyager](#): > > That scifi Christmas song about rulers from an alien planet, We Three Kings from Orient R. > > But my wife votes for Little Drummer Boy. ROFLMAO !!! For me, it would be the one with the “tender and mild” line (brain refuses to think about the title) Is it a kid or food?? Either way, I HATE that song and hope writing this does not give me an earworm that I would have to shoot. ---
**Author:** ![Musicat](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/musicat/32/20189_2.png) [@Musicat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Musicat)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2010, 1:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-have-the-power-to-permanently-eliminate-any-christmas-song/561836/155 "2010-12-03T13:26:46Z")
> [@ZipperJJ](#): > > To be honest, I really hate “Silent Night.” Why? Because I really hate singing about “young viiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiirrrrrrrggggggiiiiiiiiiin” in church, next to my mom. It makes me feel weird. But it’s _round_ young virgin. A round young virgin is worth singing about. ---
**Author:** ![Gyrate](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gyrate/32/3588_2.png) [@Gyrate](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gyrate)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2010, 1:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-have-the-power-to-permanently-eliminate-any-christmas-song/561836/156 "2010-12-03T13:43:54Z")
“Do They Know It’s Christmas?” Even Bob Geldof hates it and he wrote it. It has served its purpose. Let it die, die, die… ETA: It’s “round _yon_ virgin mother and child”, you know. Or, if you prefer, “Round John Virgin, mother and child”. ---
**Author:** ![limegreen](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/82dd89/32.png) [@limegreen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/limegreen)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2010, 8:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-have-the-power-to-permanently-eliminate-any-christmas-song/561836/157 "2010-12-03T20:10:16Z")
Christmas Shoes is at the top of my rabid, foaming-at-the-mouth list, and I LOVE Christmas songs. Maybe because it came out the year I was diagnosed with an incurable form of cancer, and I looked at my kids and said, “HELL, NO! If I’m dying, you better not be out buying me a pair of shoes. Where am I going to wear them? Bring me a Big Mac and a chocolate shake!” Complete and utter uselessness. If I ever found myself near the author of that song, I’d have to slap them so hard their eyes would cross. ---
**Author:** ![Siam\_Sam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/d78d45/32.png) [@Siam\_Sam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Siam_Sam)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2010, 11:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-have-the-power-to-permanently-eliminate-any-christmas-song/561836/158 "2010-12-03T23:37:30Z")
> [@Musicat](#): > > But it’s _round_ young virgin. A round young virgin is worth singing about. I like my virgins a bit curvy. Too many well-rounded virgins were a big impetus for leaving Texas. ---
**Author:** ![Pushkin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/ee59a6/32.png) [@Pushkin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Pushkin)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2010, 12:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-have-the-power-to-permanently-eliminate-any-christmas-song/561836/159 "2010-12-04T00:08:01Z")
> [@Wallenstein](#): > > I vote for Slade’s Merry Xmas Everyone - cannot stand it. Yes, that’s the one, kill it, kill it now with fire :mad: ---
**Author:** ![Implicit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/6a8cbe/32.png) [@Implicit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Implicit)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2010, 1:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-have-the-power-to-permanently-eliminate-any-christmas-song/561836/160 "2010-12-04T01:59:14Z")
Santa Baby. All versions of it must die. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-have-the-power-to-permanently-eliminate-any-christmas-song/561836.md?page=7) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-have-the-power-to-permanently-eliminate-any-christmas-song/561836.md?page=9)