# You Know What We Need? New Saints! **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [October 7, 2003, 11:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-know-what-we-need-new-saints/206029 "2003-10-07T11:14:41Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Rue\_DeDay](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/41988e/32.png) [@Rue\_DeDay](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rue_DeDay)\ **Post date:** [October 7, 2003, 11:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-know-what-we-need-new-saints/206029/1 "2003-10-07T11:14:41Z")
Luckily this Sunday past the Pope brought three new Saints up from the Minors. The Blesseds Daniele Comboni, Arnold Janssen and Josef Freinademetz are bright, shiny new Saints. So feel free to pray to them. Before they get all jaded and full of themselves. You know how Saints get. Just try to get a hold of Frank (either one, Assisi or Xavier) or Val or Lizzy Ann Seton (if you have a thing for girl Saints). They’re always just too busy. Bastard Saints. ---
**Author:** ![ShibbOleth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/848f3c/32.png) [@ShibbOleth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ShibbOleth)\ **Post date:** [October 7, 2003, 11:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-know-what-we-need-new-saints/206029/2 "2003-10-07T11:20:54Z")
It’s Tuesday. Quit it. ---
**Author:** ![FairyChatMom](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fairychatmom/32/21825_2.png) [@FairyChatMom](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FairyChatMom)\ **Post date:** [October 7, 2003, 11:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-know-what-we-need-new-saints/206029/3 "2003-10-07T11:50:33Z")
**St. Rue** : Patron of Mental Meanderings **St. swampbear** : Patron of Swimming Pools and Chi-hua-hua Habitrails ---
**Author:** ![JRDelirious](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jrdelirious/32/9531_2.png) [@JRDelirious](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JRDelirious)\ **Post date:** [October 7, 2003, 12:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-know-what-we-need-new-saints/206029/4 "2003-10-07T12:44:33Z")
**Rue** , you see, part of the problem with the Francises having such a full docket is that people unfairly think of them as softies who will be easily swayed. OTOH all those Thomases (Didimus, Becket, Aquinas, Moore) are sitting idle because people are intimidated that they will be grilled on the plausibility, logic or legality of their petition… ---
**Author:** ![Rue\_DeDay](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/41988e/32.png) [@Rue\_DeDay](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rue_DeDay)\ **Post date:** [October 7, 2003, 12:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-know-what-we-need-new-saints/206029/5 "2003-10-07T12:49:04Z")
**St Shibb** : Patron of Crab-asses and Grumps. Hey! I don’t control when news breaks, I’m just your Trusty Reporter. You can’t expect the Pope to bend his schedule to mine, can you? (But it would have been nice if his people gave me the “heads up”.) ---
**Author:** ![Lissla\_Lissar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/8491ac/32.png) [@Lissla\_Lissar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lissla_Lissar)\ **Post date:** [October 7, 2003, 12:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-know-what-we-need-new-saints/206029/6 "2003-10-07T12:54:41Z")
Well, I’m sure it was a mistake that they didn’t. I bet a minor clerk is being excommunicated for the screw-up, **Rue**. ---
**Author:** ![swampbear](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/swampbear/32/467_2.png) [@swampbear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/swampbear)\ **Post date:** [October 7, 2003, 4:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-know-what-we-need-new-saints/206029/7 "2003-10-07T16:35:26Z")
**St. FairyChatMom** Patron Saint of Home Owners Associations (she just loves them so! :D) and Chocolate. Psst. **FCM** you forgot to add outdoor cookers to mine. **Exgineer** Patron Saint of Snowblowers. **welby** Patron Saint of Dressing Up Funny and Inebriated Drywalling. ---
**Author:** ![Kallessa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/7993a0/32.png) [@Kallessa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kallessa)\ **Post date:** [October 7, 2003, 5:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-know-what-we-need-new-saints/206029/8 "2003-10-07T17:32:32Z")
St. Chanel–the Patron Saint of cocoa. **St. tanookie** –Patron Saint of Monopoly players. **St. Lissla Lissar** –Patron Saint of small, furry animals that like affection in the middle of the night. ---
**Author:** ![SwimmingRiddles](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/43a26b/32.png) [@SwimmingRiddles](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SwimmingRiddles)\ **Post date:** [October 7, 2003, 5:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-know-what-we-need-new-saints/206029/9 "2003-10-07T17:37:20Z")
Hold everything. I don’t ask for a lot around here, but as the official Patron Saint Title Giverouter, I ask for a little respect. ---
**Author:** ![Ponder\_Stibbons](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ponder_stibbons/32/343_2.png) [@Ponder\_Stibbons](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ponder_Stibbons)\ **Post date:** [October 7, 2003, 5:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-know-what-we-need-new-saints/206029/10 "2003-10-07T17:41:03Z")
New Saints! I hear that. I mean, these guys are never going to win a SuperBowl. Hey, somebody was bound to say it! ---
**Author:** ![Munch](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/munch/32/5281_2.png) [@Munch](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Munch)\ **Post date:** [October 7, 2003, 5:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-know-what-we-need-new-saints/206029/11 "2003-10-07T17:43:26Z")
Who’s the patron saint of bacon? 'Cause I need to know where to address my prayers, ya know? ---
**Author:** ![FairyChatMom](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fairychatmom/32/21825_2.png) [@FairyChatMom](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FairyChatMom)\ **Post date:** [October 7, 2003, 5:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-know-what-we-need-new-saints/206029/12 "2003-10-07T17:45:18Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by SwimmingRiddles \* > \*\*\ …I ask for a little respect. \*\* I think it’s safe to say that we can be sure you get as little respect as possible! 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Kallessa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/7993a0/32.png) [@Kallessa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kallessa)\ **Post date:** [October 7, 2003, 6:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-know-what-we-need-new-saints/206029/13 "2003-10-07T18:25:06Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Munch \* > \*\*Who’s the patron saint of bacon? 'Cause I need to know where to address my prayers, ya know? \*\* St. Porky Pig? St. Babe? St. Wilbur? ---
**Author:** ![AskNott](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/asknott/32/5790_2.png) [@AskNott](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AskNott)\ **Post date:** [October 7, 2003, 6:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-know-what-we-need-new-saints/206029/14 "2003-10-07T18:53:08Z")
I thought this was going to be those Nufflers in Nawlins after the Colts game. Those guys need to talk to Jude. ---
**Author:** ![Rue\_DeDay](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/41988e/32.png) [@Rue\_DeDay](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rue_DeDay)\ **Post date:** [October 7, 2003, 7:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-know-what-we-need-new-saints/206029/15 "2003-10-07T19:20:44Z")
There’s a Patron Saint for _everything_ **Munch**. (And **lno** too, but you didn’t ask.) A quick Google search gives us: [**Saint Anthony the Abbot**](http://www.catholic-forum.com/saints/sainta06.htm)! Although he’s pretty shifty. He’s also known as: Anthony of Egypt Anthony the Great Father of Cenobites Father of Western Monasticism St. Tony also has his fingers in many pies. He patronizes [ul] [li]amputees[/li][li]animals[/li][li]basket makers[/li][li]basket weavers[/li][li]brushmakers[/li][li]butchers[/li][li]cemetery workers[/li][li]domestic animals[/li][li]eczema[/li][li]epilepsy[/li][li]epileptics[/li][li]ergotism (Saint Anthony’s fire)[/li][li]erysipelas[/li][li]gravediggers[/li][li]graveyards[/li][li]hermits[/li][li]hogs[/li][li]Hospitallers[/li][li]monks[/li][li]pigs[/li][li]relief from pestilence[/li][li]skin diseases[/li][li]skin rashes[/li][li]swine[/li][li]swineherds[/li][/ul] So make sure you say right up front what you need intercession on. It’ll save everyone some time. ---
**Author:** ![Munch](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/munch/32/5281_2.png) [@Munch](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Munch)\ **Post date:** [October 7, 2003, 7:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-know-what-we-need-new-saints/206029/16 "2003-10-07T19:37:07Z")
[QUOTE] \*Originally posted by Rue DeDay \* St. Tony also has his **fingers in many pies**. He patronizes [list] [li]**amputees[/li][li]basket makers**[/li][/QUOTE] Booooo! ---
**Author:** ![Bumbazine](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bumbazine/32/362_2.png) [@Bumbazine](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bumbazine)\ **Post date:** [October 7, 2003, 8:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-know-what-we-need-new-saints/206029/17 "2003-10-07T20:06:54Z")
I think we could use another Saint in the tuba section Oh when the Saints… Go marchin’ in… ---
**Author:** ![80sHairMetalMaven](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/8/ed655f/32.png) [@80sHairMetalMaven](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/80sHairMetalMaven)\ **Post date:** [October 7, 2003, 8:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-know-what-we-need-new-saints/206029/18 "2003-10-07T20:14:47Z")
Well lookie what I found! [a href=“[http://www.catholic-forum.com/saints/saintg06.htm](http://www.catholic-forum.com/saints/saintg06.htm)”]St.Gerard[/a]–patron saint of motherhood and expectant woman has the same name as I do. Isn’t that cool. Perhaps I was destined to be pregnant all along because I had a saint sharing my married last name and silently cheering me on. 😃 MetalMaven ---
**Author:** ![80sHairMetalMaven](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/8/ed655f/32.png) [@80sHairMetalMaven](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/80sHairMetalMaven)\ **Post date:** [October 7, 2003, 8:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-know-what-we-need-new-saints/206029/19 "2003-10-07T20:16:54Z")
[St. Gerard](http://www.catholic-forum.com/saints/saintg06.htm) Link fixed. Is there a patron saint of good coding I need to beseech in order to not do that again? MetalMaven ---
**Author:** ![BoBettie](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/4af34b/32.png) [@BoBettie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BoBettie)\ **Post date:** [October 7, 2003, 8:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-know-what-we-need-new-saints/206029/20 "2003-10-07T20:36:34Z")
I was born on All Saints Day. Saint Zette? Patron saint of ??? Any suggestions? [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-know-what-we-need-new-saints/206029.md?page=2)