# You Know What We Need? New Saints! **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [October 7, 2003, 11:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-know-what-we-need-new-saints/206029 "2003-10-07T11:14:41Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![FairyChatMom](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fairychatmom/32/21906_2.png) [@FairyChatMom](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FairyChatMom)\ **Post date:** [October 7, 2003, 8:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-know-what-we-need-new-saints/206029/21 "2003-10-07T20:36:34Z")
How can we forget **St. Opal** : Patron of Lists ---
**Author:** ![Rue\_DeDay](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/41988e/32.png) [@Rue\_DeDay](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rue_DeDay)\ **Post date:** [October 7, 2003, 8:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-know-what-we-need-new-saints/206029/22 "2003-10-07T20:58:59Z")
**Saint Zette** : Patron of November First? You know how I said there are patron saints for everything? Man! Do a couple of Google searches just for fun and you find out Saints Margaret of Cortona, Mary Magdalen, and Mary of Egypt all patronize reformed prostitutes. I really shouldn’t find that as funny as I do, should I? ---
**Author:** ![Encinitas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/ee7513/32.png) [@Encinitas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Encinitas)\ **Post date:** [October 7, 2003, 9:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-know-what-we-need-new-saints/206029/23 "2003-10-07T21:05:07Z")
Are there any patron saints of Pirates? Arr… ---
**Author:** ![silenus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/silenus/32/166_2.png) [@silenus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/silenus)\ **Post date:** [October 7, 2003, 9:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-know-what-we-need-new-saints/206029/24 "2003-10-07T21:06:55Z")
Catherine of Alexandria Francis de Sales Gregory the Great John Baptist de La Salle Ursula Is it a bad sign when your occupation requires FIVE patron saints? Teaching isn’t for wimps. ---
**Author:** ![chattywine](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/5daacb/32.png) [@chattywine](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/chattywine)\ **Post date:** [October 7, 2003, 9:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-know-what-we-need-new-saints/206029/25 "2003-10-07T21:53:49Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Encinitas \* > \*\*Are there any patron saints of Pirates? > > Arr… \*\* Ayeeee Matey [there be, or would that be thar be…](http://www.stnicholascenter.org/Brix?pageID=45) Arrrrr ---
**Author:** ![JRDelirious](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jrdelirious/32/9531_2.png) [@JRDelirious](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JRDelirious)\ **Post date:** [October 7, 2003, 11:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-know-what-we-need-new-saints/206029/26 "2003-10-07T23:31:24Z")
It’s worse than you think, **silenus** , one of them – Ursula – got removed from the official calendar in1969. ---
**Author:** ![Bumbazine](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bumbazine/32/362_2.png) [@Bumbazine](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bumbazine)\ **Post date:** [October 7, 2003, 11:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-know-what-we-need-new-saints/206029/27 "2003-10-07T23:32:46Z")
In looking for a patron saint of computer programmers, of which I used to be one…um…one of which I used to be…Aw to Hell with it! Anyway, I found two;[Saint Isidore of Seville](http://www.scborromeo.org/saints/isidores.htm) and [Saint Expeditus](http://saintspreserved.com/expeditus.htm) Saint Expeditus looks a little iffy to me, so I’m going with Saint Isidore de Seville. I wonder if he has a statue, or does one just get a generic saintly looking statue and put it on their dashboard and just call it Saint Isidore? Inquiring infidels want to know. ---
**Author:** ![detop](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/bcef8e/32.png) [@detop](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/detop)\ **Post date:** [October 7, 2003, 11:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-know-what-we-need-new-saints/206029/28 "2003-10-07T23:56:12Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Rue DeDay \* > \*\ ***Saint Zette** : Patron of November First? > > You know how I said there are patron saints for everything? Man! Do a couple of Google searches just for fun and you find out Saints Margaret of Cortona, Mary Magdalen, and Mary of Egypt all patronize reformed prostitutes. > > I really shouldn’t find that as funny as I do, should I? \*\* underlining mine **St. Gaudere** : patron saint of grammar ? Maybe I will regret asking… But is there a patron saint for **un** reformed prostitutes ? 😃 ---
**Author:** ![EddyTeddyFreddy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/eddyteddyfreddy/32/18796_2.png) [@EddyTeddyFreddy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/EddyTeddyFreddy)\ **Post date:** [October 8, 2003, 12:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-know-what-we-need-new-saints/206029/29 "2003-10-08T00:58:00Z")
How about a Saint Umbilica for obstetricians? Saint Hobitch for unreformed prostitutes? Saint Marinara for Italian chefs? Saint Gatesia for Microsoft employees? Or would Gatesia be a demon? ---
**Author:** ![Rue\_DeDay](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/41988e/32.png) [@Rue\_DeDay](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rue_DeDay)\ **Post date:** [October 8, 2003, 1:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-know-what-we-need-new-saints/206029/30 "2003-10-08T01:13:17Z")
You wanna [St. Izzy statue](http://ship-of-fools.com/Gadgets/Kitschmas01/StIsidore.html) **Bumba**? You got it! And you know teaching is a rough gig **silenus**. You got more saints looking out for you than there are for ex-hookers. Unless that’s the OTHER definition of “patronize”. (That’s a good ex-hooker, yes that is!) ---
**Author:** ![Rue\_DeDay](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/41988e/32.png) [@Rue\_DeDay](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rue_DeDay)\ **Post date:** [October 8, 2003, 1:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-know-what-we-need-new-saints/206029/31 "2003-10-08T01:33:36Z")
Oops. Bad link to the St. Isadore statue. Well, the link is fine as far as it goes, but you can’t actually _order_ one that way. Try [this one](http://www.mcphee.com/enlightenment/current/10716.html) instead. Also, there’s [this one](http://spaceageplastics.homestead.com/sap2472.html), but it’s not as good since it has a cow on it. Normally I’m big on cows, but they don’t really reinforce the “computer” idea. ---
**Author:** ![Rue\_DeDay](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/41988e/32.png) [@Rue\_DeDay](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rue_DeDay)\ **Post date:** [October 8, 2003, 1:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-know-what-we-need-new-saints/206029/32 "2003-10-08T01:44:02Z")
OK, I gotta stop. I followed **chattywine** ’s link back and found out Saint Nicholas is the patron saint of (unreformed) prostitutes. Santa Claus patronizes hookers. ---
**Author:** ![Lissla\_Lissar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/8491ac/32.png) [@Lissla\_Lissar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lissla_Lissar)\ **Post date:** [October 8, 2003, 2:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-know-what-we-need-new-saints/206029/33 "2003-10-08T02:14:49Z")
Mr. Lissar is worried that my status will mean **more** small, fuzzy animals wanting attention in the middle of the night. It is a scary thought. We could have **lieu** as Patron Sant Of All Bodily Functions We Don’t Want To Think About. And I think **Osgie** should be Patron Saint Of People Who Bravely Eat Weird Deep Fried Food (I shared a deep fried twinkie and some oreos with her at the Iowa State Fair). ---
**Author:** ![detop](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/bcef8e/32.png) [@detop](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/detop)\ **Post date:** [October 8, 2003, 3:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-know-what-we-need-new-saints/206029/34 "2003-10-08T03:17:15Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Rue DeDay \* > \*\*OK, I gotta stop. I followed **chattywine** ’s link back and found out Saint Nicholas is the patron saint of (unreformed) prostitutes. Santa Claus patronizes hookers. \*\* Thanks **chattywine**. Hence, I therefore pronounce you **St. chattywine** patron saint of answers before the questions are asked 😛 Another one perhaps **St. jdavis** : patron saint of hamsters ? ---
**Author:** ![Astroboy14](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/df705f/32.png) [@Astroboy14](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Astroboy14)\ **Post date:** [October 8, 2003, 4:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-know-what-we-need-new-saints/206029/35 "2003-10-08T04:45:31Z")
Is there a Saint of Toenail Fungus? If not, can I have it? That would be kinda cool, in a weird sort of way… 😃 ---
**Author:** ![lieu](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/c2a13f/32.png) [@lieu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lieu)\ **Post date:** [October 8, 2003, 2:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-know-what-we-need-new-saints/206029/36 "2003-10-08T14:38:50Z")
I’m not sure I’d want peoples invoking my name every time they feel down in the dumps. Can’t I just be paron saint of Webber grills or, better yet, just a man for all seasonings? ---
**Author:** ![Kallessa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/7993a0/32.png) [@Kallessa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kallessa)\ **Post date:** [October 8, 2003, 4:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-know-what-we-need-new-saints/206029/37 "2003-10-08T16:54:38Z")
I would think that **St. lieu** would be the one you called on when you could get any of the others. ---
**Author:** ![Kallessa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/7993a0/32.png) [@Kallessa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kallessa)\ **Post date:** [October 8, 2003, 5:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-know-what-we-need-new-saints/206029/38 "2003-10-08T17:03:32Z")
That should be: when you couldn’t get any of the others. \*Note to self–when making bad jokes, preview is your friend. ---
**Author:** ![EddyTeddyFreddy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/eddyteddyfreddy/32/18796_2.png) [@EddyTeddyFreddy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/EddyTeddyFreddy)\ **Post date:** [October 8, 2003, 5:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-know-what-we-need-new-saints/206029/39 "2003-10-08T17:09:27Z")
Ah, Saint **Kallessa** – patron saint of preview. ---
**Author:** ![elfbabe](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/b782af/32.png) [@elfbabe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elfbabe)\ **Post date:** [October 8, 2003, 5:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-know-what-we-need-new-saints/206029/40 "2003-10-08T17:15:34Z")
Try looking at [http://www.catholic-forum.com/saints/patron00.htm](http://www.catholic-forum.com/saints/patron00.htm) for the patron saints of EVERYTHING. Like those against oversleeping or “twitching”, the patron saint of lost keys, and the patron saint of fear of mice. Religion is COOL. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-know-what-we-need-new-saints/206029.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-know-what-we-need-new-saints/206029.md?page=3)