# You know you drink too much when... **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [August 6, 2008, 5:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-know-you-drink-too-much-when/459001 "2008-08-06T05:09:37Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![lobotomyboy63](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lobotomyboy63/32/2900_2.png) [@lobotomyboy63](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lobotomyboy63)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2008, 6:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-know-you-drink-too-much-when/459001/21 "2008-08-06T18:02:02Z")
[QUOTE=Santo Rugger] … when you call your ex girlfriend and tell her you want to get married. Conversation ensues, and now you’re seriously considering moving to Denver when you finish school. [/QUOTE] Sounds like “Intervention” time… You know you drink too much when you go missing and they alert the public by putting your picture on bottles of scotch. ---
**Author:** ![pseudotriton\_ruber\_ruber](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/a9a28c/32.png) [@pseudotriton\_ruber\_ruber](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pseudotriton_ruber_ruber)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2008, 6:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-know-you-drink-too-much-when/459001/22 "2008-08-06T18:09:50Z")
…you try to flick something off your shoulder, and you find out it’s the floor. ---
**Author:** ![lobotomyboy63](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lobotomyboy63/32/2900_2.png) [@lobotomyboy63](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lobotomyboy63)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2008, 6:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-know-you-drink-too-much-when/459001/23 "2008-08-06T18:17:33Z")
[QUOTE=lobotomyboy63] Sounds like “Intervention” time… [/QUOTE] I should clarify: keep drinking if you must, but NOT THE EX… :eek: ---
**Author:** ![Chefguy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chefguy/32/138_2.png) [@Chefguy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chefguy)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2008, 6:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-know-you-drink-too-much-when/459001/24 "2008-08-06T18:30:12Z")
. . .when you decide it’s finally time to buy that Velcro suit so you don’t keep falling off the couch. ---
**Author:** ![Don\_Draper](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/b2d939/32.png) [@Don\_Draper](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Don_Draper)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2008, 6:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-know-you-drink-too-much-when/459001/25 "2008-08-06T18:52:16Z")
You go out for a night on the town in New York City, NY and wake up a week later, alone, on a beach in Miami, Florida, with not a stitch of clothing on you, no money, ID or belongings of any kind…and no clue as to how that happened. ---
**Author:** ![silenus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/silenus/32/166_2.png) [@silenus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/silenus)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2008, 7:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-know-you-drink-too-much-when/459001/26 "2008-08-06T19:17:20Z")
Just for reference: **The 10 Stages of Human Drunkenness** 1). Witty and Charming 2). Rich and Powerful 3). Benevolent 4). Clairvoyant 5). Fuck Dinner 6). Patriotic 7). Crank Up the Enola Gay 8). Witty and Charming, Part II 9). Invisible 10). Bulletproof ---
**Author:** ![gravitycrash](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/977dab/32.png) [@gravitycrash](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gravitycrash)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2008, 7:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-know-you-drink-too-much-when/459001/27 "2008-08-06T19:19:19Z")
[QUOTE=Maeglin] You don’t go to sleep next to an ugly woman, but you wake up next to one. [/QUOTE] Oh man, This has happened to me more than once. Beer goggles indeed. ---
**Author:** ![Drunky\_Smurf](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/drunky_smurf/32/449_2.png) [@Drunky\_Smurf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Drunky_Smurf)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2008, 7:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-know-you-drink-too-much-when/459001/28 "2008-08-06T19:38:52Z")
True story. One night. A friend says," Hey where’d Jimmy go?" Me: " Hahaha he’s probably passed out in a bush outside." Everyone: laughs The next morning. knock knock knock Me: opens door Jimmy: “Dude can I get a ride home?” Me: “What the fuck? Why are you here?” Jimmy: “I passed out in the backyard last night.” ---
**Author:** ![Jragon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/e19b73/32.png) [@Jragon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jragon)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2008, 8:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-know-you-drink-too-much-when/459001/29 "2008-08-06T20:07:44Z")
… you wake up from a sleep hearing your phone ring. So you pick it up. It’s your uncle Leeroy, He says he’s coming over to visit you tomorrow. After you hang up you realize that you don’t have an uncle Leeroy… or a phone. ---
**Author:** ![Hal\_Briston](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/a9a28c/32.png) [@Hal\_Briston](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hal_Briston)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2008, 10:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-know-you-drink-too-much-when/459001/30 "2008-08-06T22:12:25Z")
[QUOTE=Tahssa] True story. \ Jimmy: “I passed out in the backyard last night.” [/QUOTE] Which reminds me of my own true-life experience: …when you wake up in a tree. ---
**Author:** ![lexi](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lexi/32/6806_2.png) [@lexi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lexi)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2008, 10:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-know-you-drink-too-much-when/459001/31 "2008-08-06T22:23:45Z")
[QUOTE=Tahssa] True story. One night. A friend says," Hey where’d Jimmy go?" Me: " Hahaha he’s probably passed out in a bush outside." Everyone: laughs The next morning. knock knock knock Me: opens door Jimmy: “Dude can I get a ride home?” Me: “What the fuck? Why are you here?” Jimmy: “I passed out in the backyard last night.” [/QUOTE] I’ve been to that party, except Jimmy’s name was Gregg. ---
**Author:** ![WillSantini](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/ed8c4c/32.png) [@WillSantini](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WillSantini)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2008, 11:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-know-you-drink-too-much-when/459001/32 "2008-08-06T23:00:28Z")
when you wake up face down on a street in Tijuana, and then have to buy your shoes back from a kid for $20 ---
**Author:** ![picker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/picker/32/13969_2.png) [@picker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/picker)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2008, 11:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-know-you-drink-too-much-when/459001/33 "2008-08-06T23:43:34Z")
when you live in Wisconsin. ---
**Author:** ![Washoe](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/ecae2f/32.png) [@Washoe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Washoe)\ **Post date:** [August 7, 2008, 12:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-know-you-drink-too-much-when/459001/34 "2008-08-07T00:14:37Z")
Sometime in mid-July, you stumble upon YouTube video of yourself from the previous New Year’s Eve, dancing around your kitchen to the Village People’s _YMCA_. True story—it happened to my wife’s boss. And I _told her_ I was going to put it on YouTube, so she really should have paid more attention. ---
**Author:** ![Baraqiyal](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ecccb3/32.png) [@Baraqiyal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Baraqiyal)\ **Post date:** [August 7, 2008, 12:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-know-you-drink-too-much-when/459001/35 "2008-08-07T00:28:56Z")
Just today I received my universal remote control watch from Woot which I would never wear and have no memory whatsoever of ordering. (I’m trying to cut down.) The funny thing is, the last time I tried to order something online, I realized that my security code had worn to the point where it is completely unreadable, so I had to buy a similar item item locally. ---
**Author:** ![Savannah](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/b3f665/32.png) [@Savannah](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Savannah)\ **Post date:** [August 7, 2008, 12:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-know-you-drink-too-much-when/459001/36 "2008-08-07T00:32:39Z")
[QUOTE=Hal Briston] Which reminds me of my own true-life experience: …when you wake up in a tree. [/QUOTE] Dear god, my laugh was so explosive and tinged with the quality of “yelp” that my husband rose off the couch to see if I was dying. ---
**Author:** ![Full\_Metal\_Lotus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/df705f/32.png) [@Full\_Metal\_Lotus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Full_Metal_Lotus)\ **Post date:** [August 7, 2008, 12:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-know-you-drink-too-much-when/459001/37 "2008-08-07T00:58:25Z")
When you: Pay for your groceries/gas/rent/a small island in the caribean with your bottle/can returns Have a brilliant artistic inspiration, go down into your studio, proceed to use that 48"X60" of hand made paper you have been saving for years (very expensive), clog up two airbrushes with improperly mixed paint, (discarding them to dry into expesnsive junk), lose inspiration and wander off, having done about $350 in damage to your art materials budget Get into flame wars with people you don’t know, about issues you care or know nothing about, and then give them your home ph #… You decide to “fine tune” yuour computer’s operating/wireless config, screwing it up for weeks… I used to drink… FML ---
**Author:** ![ultrafilter](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/3d9bf3/32.png) [@ultrafilter](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ultrafilter)\ **Post date:** [August 7, 2008, 1:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-know-you-drink-too-much-when/459001/38 "2008-08-07T01:09:15Z")
…wake up three days later piloting a small aircraft, with your copilot passed out and a hooker doing cocaine in the bathroom. Not my story; I remember someone here (maybe **Qadgop**?) posting about it. ---
**Author:** ![snailboy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/97f17d/32.png) [@snailboy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/snailboy)\ **Post date:** [August 7, 2008, 2:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-know-you-drink-too-much-when/459001/39 "2008-08-07T02:37:00Z")
When you have to get a ride home from the bar… and you live across the street. I tried to get the waitress to go home with me that night. ---
**Author:** ![TokyoBayer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tokyobayer/32/13989_2.png) [@TokyoBayer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TokyoBayer)\ **Post date:** [August 7, 2008, 3:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-know-you-drink-too-much-when/459001/40 "2008-08-07T03:08:53Z")
[QUOTE=WillSantini] when you wake up face down on a street in Tijuana, and then have to buy your shoes back from a kid for $20 [/QUOTE] And you started drinking in NYC. The above story happened to my friend, except he woke up in a gutter in the Shibuya area of Tokyo, (on the way to his home from Roppongi), with a full load in his briefs, broken glasses and about $100 missing from his wallet. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-know-you-drink-too-much-when/459001.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-know-you-drink-too-much-when/459001.md?page=3)