# You Know You Want to: Post the funniest Craigslist ads you've seen lately **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [November 7, 2010, 5:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-know-you-want-to-post-the-funniest-craigslist-ads-youve-seen-lately/559806 "2010-11-07T17:53:30Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 11\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![Zsofia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/7bcc69/32.png) [@Zsofia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zsofia)\ **Post date:** [November 8, 2010, 9:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-know-you-want-to-post-the-funniest-craigslist-ads-youve-seen-lately/559806/41 "2010-11-08T21:41:45Z")
> [@lindsaybluth](#): > > Well DUH I know about the best of Craigslist, but most of those people are intentionally funny. I’m looking for those who lack self-awareness! 😉 > > That said, Zsofia, that ad was preeeeeetty great. On the one hand, it’s conscious of itself - on the other, I think it’s possible that guy might really be that cool. ---
**Author:** ![elmwood](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/elmwood/32/3060_2.png) [@elmwood](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elmwood)\ **Post date:** [November 8, 2010, 9:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-know-you-want-to-post-the-funniest-craigslist-ads-youve-seen-lately/559806/42 "2010-11-08T21:56:14Z")
> [@filling\_pages](#): > > It’s code for being in AA. Ah. Thanks! ---
**Author:** ![filling\_pages](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/b9bd4f/32.png) [@filling\_pages](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/filling_pages)\ **Post date:** [November 8, 2010, 10:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-know-you-want-to-post-the-funniest-craigslist-ads-youve-seen-lately/559806/43 "2010-11-08T22:00:03Z")
> [@elmwood](#): > > Ah. Thanks! And Friends of Dorothy are gay. I once heard gay AA referred to as a “Dorothy and Bill meeting”. ---
**Author:** ![Rick](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/9f8e36/32.png) [@Rick](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rick)\ **Post date:** [November 8, 2010, 10:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-know-you-want-to-post-the-funniest-craigslist-ads-youve-seen-lately/559806/44 "2010-11-08T22:20:33Z")
My favorite was a tool ad: **For sale a pair of fire distingushiers $15.** Distingushiers? Is that something you point at what what you might think was a fire, pull the trigger and it says Yes that is a fire/or/ no that is not a fire. doesn’t put it out mind you, but it does tell you if it is a fire. ---
**Author:** ![lindsaybluth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/90db22/32.png) [@lindsaybluth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lindsaybluth)\ **Post date:** [November 9, 2010, 4:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-know-you-want-to-post-the-funniest-craigslist-ads-youve-seen-lately/559806/45 "2010-11-09T04:26:41Z")
I love the shit out of this thread. Call me crazy, but wouldn’t it better to have a roommate that drinks sparingly (such as myself) rather than one who is trying to stay on the wagon as well? Seems like if I got together with another person who liked doughnuts as much as me it would be twice as hard not to go to Dunkin Donuts. ---
**Author:** ![SkipMagic](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/skipmagic/32/20706_2.png) [@SkipMagic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SkipMagic)\ **Post date:** [November 9, 2010, 1:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-know-you-want-to-post-the-funniest-craigslist-ads-youve-seen-lately/559806/46 "2010-11-09T13:26:24Z")
Free microwave! [http://kansascity.craigslist.org/app/2049532317.html](http://kansascity.craigslist.org/app/2049532317.html) > [@](#): > > This microwave? It’s great. Wonderful. Life-saving, even, seeing as how it helped me and Billy Peltzer save Christmas from those nasty gremlins. (It’s been cleaned.) So, really, you’re getting a one-of-a-kind appliance for free. Go ahead, ask your buddies if they have a big, black microwave with a rotating plastic plate in the middle of it. I’ll wait. ---
**Author:** ![Bam\_Boo\_Gut](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/8c91f0/32.png) [@Bam\_Boo\_Gut](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bam_Boo_Gut)\ **Post date:** [November 9, 2010, 3:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-know-you-want-to-post-the-funniest-craigslist-ads-youve-seen-lately/559806/47 "2010-11-09T15:58:08Z")
> [@Rick](#): > > My favorite was a tool ad: > **For sale a pair of fire distingushiers $15.** > Distingushiers? Is that something you point at what what you might think was a fire, pull the trigger and it says Yes that is a fire/or/ no that is not a fire. doesn’t put it out mind you, but it does tell you if it is a fire. Oh Rick, you’re just not getting it. It distinguishes the different **types** of fire. :smack: ---
**Author:** ![Quercus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/q/7ab992/32.png) [@Quercus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Quercus)\ **Post date:** [November 9, 2010, 4:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-know-you-want-to-post-the-funniest-craigslist-ads-youve-seen-lately/559806/48 "2010-11-09T16:28:40Z")
> [@Jimmy\_Chitwood](#): > > [I would like to hire a skilled painter with creative vision into both the future and the mythological worlds. I would like a painting of a beast, or more precisely, a robot beast. Commonly known as a centaur. But what kind of cantaur? One that is part horse. PART ROBOT.](http://philadelphia.craigslist.org/med/2044974977.html) Wait, are you sure there wasn’t another line, “Painting location will be ceiling in NYC. No Red Sox, Mets or Texas Rangers fans, please.” ?? ---
**Author:** ![StGermain](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/stgermain/32/2868_2.png) [@StGermain](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/StGermain)\ **Post date:** [November 9, 2010, 5:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-know-you-want-to-post-the-funniest-craigslist-ads-youve-seen-lately/559806/49 "2010-11-09T17:06:03Z")
This isn’t recent - I posted it some time ago. But it is classic: > [@](#): > > I need a tractor…I bought this cabin on three acres of land, way out in the country. It seemed a really good deal. I mean people had been living in it and quite reluctant to leave. How bad could it be…even if it was an as-is foreclosure deal, so I live there now. > > The place doesn’t have running water, the previous residents must have been hardy folk, as they were transporting their water from a shallow creek along the backside , and running it through a coffee filter to remove the solids. I don’t think they were drinking much of it as there is ample evidence that they drank only beer. A lot of beer, judging from the quantity of beer cans and bottles in the brush, scattered liberally throughout the three acres and the adjoining property as well. So I will soon be drilling a well. > > They sure did like their beer, Bud Lite seemed to be the preferred brand, but occasionally they tried Old Milwaukee and Schlitz, I suppose on those weekends when money was a little tight. They evidently also enjoyed shooting the beer bottles, lining them up in the driveway was a favorite pastime of theirs, such fun loving people…they were good marksmen too! I can’t find any beer bottles in that drive that weren’t shattered! So I really need a tractor, one that might come with a box blade. > > If I can find a tractor with a box blade I could use it to scrape up a lot of the beer bottles and aluminum cans. Probably pay for it through recycling, and it would also be useful for filling in the septic tank hole. I found it one day while picking up beer bottles. Yep, those clever folks were quite an ingenious bunch! Why they had built their own septic system, a very impressive feat of engineering. Unfortunately the fifty-five gallon drum they used for the solids had rusted through it’s top, and the earth above it was only supported by roots interwoven with shot up aluminum beer cans. I had wondered where it was, but I found it just fine when I walked across it and bent over to gather up another arm load of shot up Bud Lite cans. Lucky me…I was going to have to call some one and pay them to find it! > > I will probably now need a new septic tank too, at least a new fifty-five gallon drum, so I don’t have a lot of money to spend on the tractor. But if I could find one that had an old bush hog on it, that would be great. You see…the field beside the house has a lot of beer cans and bottles in it as well, and come hell or high water, I am not walking back out there until it’s cleared! The last venture was bad enough, and I wonder if I could survive another. With ticks as big as house cats, and chiggers as big as softballs, I don’t think the average man could do it. Why they’d take a man my size down like a pride of lions on an antelope scampering across the Serengeti…After I got out of the hospital from undergoing a massive influx of anti-biotic and overnight observation, I found that I had spent a good portion of my tractor money. That spotted tick/lyme disease crap is rough, I can attest to it. > > So in closing, if any one out there has an old tractor, with any of the above two implements and aren’t asking an arm and a leg for it, ticks almost got my one good leg and I am a bit partial to the other even if it is all swollen up from falling in the septic tank. I’d be interested in hearing from you. I am thinking I can spend 3500 maximum, but would prefer to keep it below 3 g’s. Maybe a good running Ford 8/9N or 2000… > > I can be reached at 615-XXX-XXXX evenings, and 615-XXX-XXXX days and some evenings. If you try to reach me several times and don’t connect, I may have found the old well, so I appreciate a call to 911. > > Ask for Jack StG ---
**Author:** ![lindsaybluth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/90db22/32.png) [@lindsaybluth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lindsaybluth)\ **Post date:** [November 9, 2010, 6:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-know-you-want-to-post-the-funniest-craigslist-ads-youve-seen-lately/559806/50 "2010-11-09T18:03:26Z")
Bahahaha this is great: > [@](#): > > If you try to reach me several times and don’t connect, I may have found the old well, so I appreciate a call to 911. ---
**Author:** ![Gilliver](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/5fc32e/32.png) [@Gilliver](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gilliver)\ **Post date:** [November 9, 2010, 6:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-know-you-want-to-post-the-funniest-craigslist-ads-youve-seen-lately/559806/51 "2010-11-09T18:32:46Z")
This is kind of different. Why would a Jonas brother be even reading the Mobile, AL area craigslist? [http://mobile.craigslist.org/act/2044216704.html](http://mobile.craigslist.org/act/2044216704.html) [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-know-you-want-to-post-the-funniest-craigslist-ads-youve-seen-lately/559806.md?page=2)