# You know your watching mediocre fiction when: **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [May 22, 2011, 6:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-know-your-watching-mediocre-fiction-when/582762 "2011-05-22T06:44:06Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 9\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![cmyk](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cmyk/32/3353_2.png) [@cmyk](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cmyk)\ **Post date:** [May 22, 2011, 6:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-know-your-watching-mediocre-fiction-when/582762/1 "2011-05-22T06:44:06Z")
…Every graphic and keypress on their computer makes blips and bleep sounds. …Any time someone says, “Enhance Image” and this blob of grain and fuzz becomes in immaculate, pristine image after someone applied the Mosaic plugin in After Effects. … ---
**Author:** ![Horatio\_Hellpop](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/e5b9ba/32.png) [@Horatio\_Hellpop](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Horatio_Hellpop)\ **Post date:** [May 22, 2011, 6:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-know-your-watching-mediocre-fiction-when/582762/2 "2011-05-22T06:46:23Z")
Two minor characters talk about how awesome/deep/tragic the protagonist is, behind his back. ---
**Author:** ![cmyk](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cmyk/32/3353_2.png) [@cmyk](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cmyk)\ **Post date:** [May 22, 2011, 7:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-know-your-watching-mediocre-fiction-when/582762/3 "2011-05-22T07:07:20Z")
…At the very moment the bad guy is about to pull the trigger on the good guy, the good guy’s friend that you forgot about because they got separated way back in Act 2, suddenly shows up to score a bad-guy head-shot, and save the day. Bonus points if the good guy’s friend isn’t revealed until the bad guy’s body falls out of the way. ---
**Author:** ![Der\_Trihs](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/der_trihs/32/233_2.png) [@Der\_Trihs](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Der_Trihs)\ **Post date:** [May 22, 2011, 7:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-know-your-watching-mediocre-fiction-when/582762/4 "2011-05-22T07:14:20Z")
The women spend an inordinate amount of time washing their breasts in the shower. The computer monitor projects lines of colored light onto the computer guy’s face. A bunch of people who know there’s a killer on the loose all split up and go out of sight of each other. Bonus points if they start walking backwards at any point. ---
**Author:** ![Chefguy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chefguy/32/138_2.png) [@Chefguy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chefguy)\ **Post date:** [May 22, 2011, 2:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-know-your-watching-mediocre-fiction-when/582762/5 "2011-05-22T14:56:45Z")
Someone enters a house/room/cellar/office and the light switch doesn’t work, but he/she proceeds into the space anyway. You fool! Don’t you hear the ominous music? Someone walks through a drenching downpour to get to his lover, because he’s really, really sorry, and nothing says “I’m Sorry” like the smell of wet wool and underwear stuck to your ass. ---
**Author:** ![PlainJain](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/5daacb/32.png) [@PlainJain](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PlainJain)\ **Post date:** [May 22, 2011, 4:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-know-your-watching-mediocre-fiction-when/582762/6 "2011-05-22T16:08:20Z")
> [@Der\_Trihs](#): > > The computer monitor projects lines of colored light onto the computer guy’s face. I would say this is just movie shorthand - sort of like how dashboard lights always illuminate the passengers faces. Not that it’s not bullshit, but to me its more about artistic lighting rather than bad fiction. ---
**Author:** ![cmyk](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cmyk/32/3353_2.png) [@cmyk](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cmyk)\ **Post date:** [May 22, 2011, 6:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-know-your-watching-mediocre-fiction-when/582762/7 "2011-05-22T18:20:39Z")
The ever-present MAP OF THE EARTH, which shows projections of a pandemic starting as a small red blotch, until it exponentially grows consuming the entire earth (even in the arctic and antarctic regions) in a matter of a week. This is almost always on a _gigundous_ screen in some darkly lit situation room. ---
**Author:** ![etv78](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/d78d45/32.png) [@etv78](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/etv78)\ **Post date:** [May 22, 2011, 7:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-know-your-watching-mediocre-fiction-when/582762/8 "2011-05-22T19:11:09Z")
> [@cmyk](#): > > …At the very moment the bad guy is about to pull the trigger on the good guy, the good guy’s friend that you forgot about because they got separated way back in Act 2, suddenly shows up to score a bad-guy head-shot, and save the day. > > Bonus points if the good guy’s friend isn’t revealed until the bad guy’s body falls out of the way. HEY! I LIKED “Billy Madison”! 😉 ---
**Author:** ![cmyk](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cmyk/32/3353_2.png) [@cmyk](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cmyk)\ **Post date:** [May 23, 2011, 6:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-know-your-watching-mediocre-fiction-when/582762/9 "2011-05-23T18:10:20Z")
> [@etv78](#): > > HEY! I LIKED “Billy Madison”! 😉 And I loved “24”! 😉