# You know you're getting old when...
**URL:** https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-know-youre-getting-old-when/357172
**Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share
**Created:** [May 17, 2006, 9:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-know-youre-getting-old-when/357172 "2006-05-17T21:34:34Z")
**Posts on this page:** 20
**Page:** 2
### Author:  [@Eve](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eve)
#### Post date: [May 18, 2006, 12:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-know-youre-getting-old-when/357172/21 "2006-05-18T00:13:03Z")
When one of your coworkers tells another, “I can’t believe you were already in _high school_ when I was born!” and you realize you had long graduated _college_ when she was born . . .
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### Author:  [@Angua](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Angua)
#### Post date: [May 18, 2006, 12:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-know-youre-getting-old-when/357172/22 "2006-05-18T00:22:55Z")
When 16 year olds start calling you “aunty”.
This happened to me the other day. I’m only 25 damnit! I’m too young for you to be calling me aunty. I have friends your age!
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### Author:  [@Dijon\_Warlock](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dijon_Warlock)
#### Post date: [May 18, 2006, 12:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-know-youre-getting-old-when/357172/23 "2006-05-18T00:37:38Z")
> [@Mouse\_Maven](#):
>
> When you remember when your school got **one** computer and it was a very big deal.
I remember this! It was an Apple ][, and it was circa 1980. I was the first student to express an interest in learning how to use it. I started learning BASIC on that thing. 32k of memory, I think, and hooked up to a television.
> [@](#):
>
> You can remember when cordless phones were first sold in stores and there were no cell phones.
Shoot, I can remember before phones were cordless. I can remember before people BOUGHT telephones, when we leased rotary dials from the phone company (those things were built like workhorses). I also remember the first time I saw a touch tone phone: it was on a show called American Bandstand, and it was used as a sort of synthesiser by a band (don’t remember the name) who did a song (again, don’t remember, but something along the line of “Don’t Call Us, We’ll Call You”) containing a riff from a Beatles’ song (“I Feel Fine”, I think).
> [@](#):
>
> You owned a black and white TV with the two dial knobs.
Do you mean the VHF and UHF tuning dials? i didn’t own one, but I remember my parents owning a few. I can do you better than that, however: my uncle still has a working television that has Channel 1.
> [@](#):
>
> You know how to do long-division on paper because no one in your elementry school could afford a calculator.
I don’t know about “afford,” but back in my elementary days, calculators weren’t available to us. So, yes, I guess: we learned long division on paper.
> [@](#):
>
> You still have records and cassett tapes.
Yep and yep.
> [@](#):
>
> When you were a kid there were four kinds of drinks: Coke, Pepsi, 7-Up and root beer.
Now _that’s_ older than me, if it’s true at all.
It seems that if I go for all the contributions that I will be posting forever.
Thus, my personal one:
**You know you’re getting old when: people half your age are legal to date.**
Well, it’s true. I’m not espousing the practice, but it’s certainly not a sign of youth!
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### Author:  [@pinkfreud](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pinkfreud)
#### Post date: [May 18, 2006, 12:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-know-youre-getting-old-when/357172/24 "2006-05-18T00:58:05Z")
I was recently reminded of my antiquity when someone on another board was describing a movie that was “really, really old,” and I realized that the movie was released the same year that I joined AARP.
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### Author:  [@Nic2004](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nic2004)
#### Post date: [May 18, 2006, 1:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-know-youre-getting-old-when/357172/25 "2006-05-18T01:22:33Z")
::_sigh_:: I just turned FIFTY on Monday, the 15th and I have to come across this post. ::_heavy sigh_::
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### Author:  [@Mister\_Rik](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mister_Rik)
#### Post date: [May 18, 2006, 1:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-know-youre-getting-old-when/357172/26 "2006-05-18T01:23:32Z")
> [@Dijon Warlock](#):
>
> Thus, my personal one:
>
> **You know you’re getting old when: people half your age are legal to date.**
>
> Well, it’s true. I’m not espousing the practice, but it’s certainly not a sign of youth!
My latest rule is “I have to be younger than her dad.” Cuz I’m 40 today and there are these smokin’ hot 20-year-olds who work at a nearby store, and …
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### Author:  [@Canadjun](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Canadjun)
#### Post date: [May 18, 2006, 1:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-know-youre-getting-old-when/357172/27 "2006-05-18T01:33:05Z")
> [@Freudian\_Slip](#):
>
> OH, and for the techies in the audience. Try talking about BBSs. And 1200 baud modems. Guaranteed blank stares.
1200 baud? Excuse me?! I thought we were talking about **old** stuff, like 300 baud modems with an acoustic coupler that you stuffed the phone into. Betcha one of those would surprise the young’uns out there.
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### Author:  [@Rysdad](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rysdad)
#### Post date: [May 18, 2006, 1:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-know-youre-getting-old-when/357172/28 "2006-05-18T01:42:22Z")
> [@Mouse\_Maven](#):
>
> You still have records and cassett tapes.
I still have an 8-track I recorded while in the Army.
One of my biggest differences between being young and old is that, when I was young, I knew the exact cause of every ache or pain I might’ve had. Now they just seem to pop up at random for no good reason.
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### Author:  [@Linty\_Fresh](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Linty_Fresh)
#### Post date: [May 18, 2006, 1:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-know-youre-getting-old-when/357172/29 "2006-05-18T01:51:04Z")
When college undergraduates start looking like they’re in junior high and grad students look like they’re high school sophmores
When your kid sister has her M.D.
When you pass the movie theater billboard and don’t recognize half the movies being advertised.
When you stop identifying with the young rebellious heroes in TV shows and start identifying with their stern, killjoy teachers/bosses/arresting officers.
When you see a hot looking older woman at work and start having impure thougts along the Anne Bancroft/Dustin Hoffman line . . . before finding out that she’s two years younger than you.
Along those lines, when two or more professors are younger than you–and have three children each.
When you start trying to count how long it’s been since you saw a high school friend before realizing that high school was over _eighteen years ago!!_
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### Author:  [@KP](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/KP)
#### Post date: [May 18, 2006, 2:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-know-youre-getting-old-when/357172/30 "2006-05-18T02:05:22Z")
A child arrived just the other day
He came to the world in the usual way
Soon he was a remote, cause his folks would say
Turn to Channel 2, it’s Epraim Zimbalist day
he was a whiz at 'tenna 'justment, because he knew
How to stand for an hour or two
So the pidture stayed straight and true
Chorus
And his dad wore a slide rule, and his mom wore a dress,
(and they both of them wore girdles - hoo-boy what a mess!)
Is GI Joe a doll, dad?
“Wash your mouth with soap! You know you’ll never cope!
You’ll probably charter on The Dope.”
The boy turned ten, just the other day,
The Sixties didn’t work out the way they all say.
The Sixties were the Seventies, When did they decide?
It was a cliche well before '75
But we reached the Moon, and we smiled, and I gotta say
I’d go to Nam to relive that day, yeah
Vietnam was worth that day.
CHORUS
Well he came from college just the other day
He was living with a girl, you know that’s okay
We were proud but scared, We’d never talked about sex.
We were half-afraid that there’d be something next.
“Hey don’t worry much, Dad, it’s same as it’s ever been
Too bad you ndidn’t try it out much then, dad.
I might’ve asked for advice then.”
CHORUS
Dad’s long since retired, and he dates a coed.
(Don’t look so flabbergasted, the man is old, not dead)
He said “About this Viagra, suppose I took it twice?”
(He should have paid for med school if he wanted advice)
You know, I got my office hours, you can book with the nurse
Is the problem getting worse?
Or are you getting perverse?"
And as I hung up on my cell phone, it occured to me
It had a vidsceen like Dick Tracy
Where’re the flying cars they promised me?
CHORUS
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### Author:  [@kaiwik](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kaiwik)
#### Post date: [May 18, 2006, 5:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-know-youre-getting-old-when/357172/31 "2006-05-18T05:34:14Z")
My OMG I am OLD revelation came just last month when we replaced all of our old and worn large appliances with spanking brand new machines. How did so much time go by that a new washer/drier, range and refridgerator can make me dance with glee???
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### Author:  [@Mister\_Rik](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mister_Rik)
#### Post date: [May 18, 2006, 7:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-know-youre-getting-old-when/357172/32 "2006-05-18T07:36:30Z")
> [@Linty Fresh](#):
>
> When college undergraduates start looking like they’re in junior high and grad students look like they’re high school sophmores
HA! I quit drinking when I was 28, and so I didn’t get our to bars for quite a few years after that. Then a couple years ago I got a job cooking in a bar, and I noticed the 21-22-year-olds. I finally understood why everybody in the bars kept calling me a “puppy” when _I_ was 21.
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### Author:  [@Tuckerfan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tuckerfan)
#### Post date: [May 18, 2006, 8:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-know-youre-getting-old-when/357172/33 "2006-05-18T08:45:11Z")
When you look at the hotties in a pr0n mag and realize that if they’re not lying about their age, you’re old enough to be their father! Who’s your daddy?
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### Author:  [@Baker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Baker)
#### Post date: [May 18, 2006, 9:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-know-youre-getting-old-when/357172/34 "2006-05-18T09:32:36Z")
> [@swampbear](#):
>
> When you go home for the weekend and go to church with your mother and see an old high school classmate and she introduces you to her grandchildren! :eek: \*
And I am now older than my grandmother was when I was born! :eek:
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### Author:  [@Beware\_of\_Doug](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beware_of_Doug)
#### Post date: [May 18, 2006, 9:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-know-youre-getting-old-when/357172/35 "2006-05-18T21:35:01Z")
When people younger than you are Senators, CEOs, and hypertensives.
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### Author:  [@Biffy\_the\_Elephant\_Shrew](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Biffy_the_Elephant_Shrew)
#### Post date: [May 18, 2006, 10:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-know-youre-getting-old-when/357172/36 "2006-05-18T22:53:02Z")
> [@Nic2004](#):
>
> ::_sigh_:: I just turned FIFTY on Monday, the 15th and I have to come across this post. ::_heavy sigh_::
Damn, man, you _are_ old.
I don’t turn 50 for two more weeks!
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### Author:  [@Biffy\_the\_Elephant\_Shrew](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Biffy_the_Elephant_Shrew)
#### Post date: [May 18, 2006, 10:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-know-youre-getting-old-when/357172/37 "2006-05-18T22:57:47Z")
> [@Amaranta](#):
>
> Someone young knowing who the Beatles were, or not knowing of either band, those two scenarios make sense. But knowing who Paul McCartney is, and that he was in a not-as-popular band with one main hit ten years before they were born, and NOT knowing he was in of the greatest bands in history, with many hit songs, that figure so prominently in pop culture, twenty years before they were born?
Wings had only one main hit?
Incidentally, I saw a schoolgirl waiting at a bus stop a few days ago wearing a Beatles t-shirt. I wondered whether she really liked the Beatles or if it was some kind of ironic gesture. Then the next day at the same stop I noticed a boy in an AC/DC shirt.
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### Author:  [@Nightsong](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nightsong)
#### Post date: [May 18, 2006, 10:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-know-youre-getting-old-when/357172/38 "2006-05-18T22:58:42Z")
When you remember when there was just MTV (no VH1, etc.) **and** when MTV played only music videos. Sigh. ☹
(I highly reccomend the song ‘1985’ by Bowling for Soup if you want to hear some other things that’ll make you feel old!)
* * *
\<\< [SENILE.COM](http://SENILE.COM) found . . . Out Of Memory . . . \>\>
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### Author:  [@Kilvert\_s\_Pagan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kilvert_s_Pagan)
#### Post date: [May 18, 2006, 11:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-know-youre-getting-old-when/357172/39 "2006-05-18T23:46:08Z")
> [@Dijon Warlock](#):
>
> I also remember the first time I saw a touch tone phone: it was on a show called American Bandstand, and it was used as a sort of synthesiser by a band (don’t remember the name) who did a song (again, don’t remember, but something along the line of “Don’t Call Us, We’ll Call You”) containing a riff from a Beatles’ song (“I Feel Fine”, I think).
Correct on both counts… I think the band was Sugarloaf, which also did Green-Eyed Lady.
I got asked how many grandchildren I have on my recent high school reunion invitation. (My children are 9 and 4!)
I remember at least one popular Paul Simon song written prior to Simon and Garfunkle’s heyday.
I use words like heyday. :rolleyes:
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### Author:  [@don\_t\_ask](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/don_t_ask)
#### Post date: [May 19, 2006, 1:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-know-youre-getting-old-when/357172/40 "2006-05-19T01:37:14Z")
A few days ago I was talking to Mark about AC/DC and reffered to Brian Johnston as the “new” singer with the band. Mark pointed out that since his birth Johnson had “always” been the singer for AC/DC. And indeed Johnson took over from Bon Scott **26** years ago. Oh Dear.
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