When one of your coworkers tells another, “I can’t believe you were already in high school when I was born!” and you realize you had long graduated college when she was born . . .
When 16 year olds start calling you “aunty”.
This happened to me the other day. I’m only 25 damnit! I’m too young for you to be calling me aunty. I have friends your age!
I remember this! It was an Apple ][, and it was circa 1980. I was the first student to express an interest in learning how to use it. I started learning BASIC on that thing. 32k of memory, I think, and hooked up to a television.
Shoot, I can remember before phones were cordless. I can remember before people BOUGHT telephones, when we leased rotary dials from the phone company (those things were built like workhorses). I also remember the first time I saw a touch tone phone: it was on a show called American Bandstand, and it was used as a sort of synthesiser by a band (don’t remember the name) who did a song (again, don’t remember, but something along the line of “Don’t Call Us, We’ll Call You”) containing a riff from a Beatles’ song (“I Feel Fine”, I think).
Do you mean the VHF and UHF tuning dials? i didn’t own one, but I remember my parents owning a few. I can do you better than that, however: my uncle still has a working television that has Channel 1.
I don’t know about “afford,” but back in my elementary days, calculators weren’t available to us. So, yes, I guess: we learned long division on paper.
Yep and yep.
Now that’s older than me, if it’s true at all.
It seems that if I go for all the contributions that I will be posting forever.
Thus, my personal one:
You know you’re getting old when: people half your age are legal to date.
Well, it’s true. I’m not espousing the practice, but it’s certainly not a sign of youth!
I was recently reminded of my antiquity when someone on another board was describing a movie that was “really, really old,” and I realized that the movie was released the same year that I joined AARP.
::sigh:: I just turned FIFTY on Monday, the 15th and I have to come across this post. ::heavy sigh::
My latest rule is “I have to be younger than her dad.” Cuz I’m 40 today and there are these smokin’ hot 20-year-olds who work at a nearby store, and …
1200 baud? Excuse me?! I thought we were talking about old stuff, like 300 baud modems with an acoustic coupler that you stuffed the phone into. Betcha one of those would surprise the young’uns out there.
I still have an 8-track I recorded while in the Army.
One of my biggest differences between being young and old is that, when I was young, I knew the exact cause of every ache or pain I might’ve had. Now they just seem to pop up at random for no good reason.
When college undergraduates start looking like they’re in junior high and grad students look like they’re high school sophmores
When your kid sister has her M.D.
When you pass the movie theater billboard and don’t recognize half the movies being advertised.
When you stop identifying with the young rebellious heroes in TV shows and start identifying with their stern, killjoy teachers/bosses/arresting officers.
When you see a hot looking older woman at work and start having impure thougts along the Anne Bancroft/Dustin Hoffman line . . . before finding out that she’s two years younger than you.
Along those lines, when two or more professors are younger than you–and have three children each.
When you start trying to count how long it’s been since you saw a high school friend before realizing that high school was over eighteen years ago!!
A child arrived just the other day
He came to the world in the usual way
Soon he was a remote, cause his folks would say
Turn to Channel 2, it’s Epraim Zimbalist day
he was a whiz at 'tenna 'justment, because he knew
How to stand for an hour or two
So the pidture stayed straight and true
Chorus
And his dad wore a slide rule, and his mom wore a dress,
(and they both of them wore girdles - hoo-boy what a mess!)
Is GI Joe a doll, dad?
“Wash your mouth with soap! You know you’ll never cope!
You’ll probably charter on The Dope.”
The boy turned ten, just the other day,
The Sixties didn’t work out the way they all say.
The Sixties were the Seventies, When did they decide?
It was a cliche well before '75
But we reached the Moon, and we smiled, and I gotta say
I’d go to Nam to relive that day, yeah
Vietnam was worth that day.
CHORUS
Well he came from college just the other day
He was living with a girl, you know that’s okay
We were proud but scared, We’d never talked about sex.
We were half-afraid that there’d be something next.
“Hey don’t worry much, Dad, it’s same as it’s ever been
Too bad you ndidn’t try it out much then, dad.
I might’ve asked for advice then.”
CHORUS
Dad’s long since retired, and he dates a coed.
(Don’t look so flabbergasted, the man is old, not dead)
He said “About this Viagra, suppose I took it twice?”
(He should have paid for med school if he wanted advice)
You know, I got my office hours, you can book with the nurse
Is the problem getting worse?
Or are you getting perverse?"
And as I hung up on my cell phone, it occured to me
It had a vidsceen like Dick Tracy
Where’re the flying cars they promised me?
CHORUS
My OMG I am OLD revelation came just last month when we replaced all of our old and worn large appliances with spanking brand new machines. How did so much time go by that a new washer/drier, range and refridgerator can make me dance with glee???
HA! I quit drinking when I was 28, and so I didn’t get our to bars for quite a few years after that. Then a couple years ago I got a job cooking in a bar, and I noticed the 21-22-year-olds. I finally understood why everybody in the bars kept calling me a “puppy” when I was 21.
When you look at the hotties in a pr0n mag and realize that if they’re not lying about their age, you’re old enough to be their father! Who’s your daddy?
And I am now older than my grandmother was when I was born! :eek:
When people younger than you are Senators, CEOs, and hypertensives.
Damn, man, you are old.
I don’t turn 50 for two more weeks!
Wings had only one main hit?
Incidentally, I saw a schoolgirl waiting at a bus stop a few days ago wearing a Beatles t-shirt. I wondered whether she really liked the Beatles or if it was some kind of ironic gesture. Then the next day at the same stop I noticed a boy in an AC/DC shirt.
When you remember when there was just MTV (no VH1, etc.) and when MTV played only music videos. Sigh. 
(I highly reccomend the song ‘1985’ by Bowling for Soup if you want to hear some other things that’ll make you feel old!)
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Correct on both counts… I think the band was Sugarloaf, which also did Green-Eyed Lady.
I got asked how many grandchildren I have on my recent high school reunion invitation. (My children are 9 and 4!)
I remember at least one popular Paul Simon song written prior to Simon and Garfunkle’s heyday.
I use words like heyday. :rolleyes:
A few days ago I was talking to Mark about AC/DC and reffered to Brian Johnston as the “new” singer with the band. Mark pointed out that since his birth Johnson had “always” been the singer for AC/DC. And indeed Johnson took over from Bon Scott 26 years ago. Oh Dear.