# You learn there's an afterlife, do you change? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [July 19, 2019, 10:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-learn-theres-an-afterlife-do-you-change/837298 "2019-07-19T10:35:21Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![QuickSilver](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/quicksilver/32/7832_2.png) [@QuickSilver](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/QuickSilver)\ **Post date:** [July 19, 2019, 4:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-learn-theres-an-afterlife-do-you-change/837298/21 "2019-07-19T16:23:18Z")
> [@Inigo\_Montoya](#): > > Buuuuut if the OP’s sorting mechanism is a judgmental entity examining the souls and depositing them in the appropriate pleasant/unpleasant afterlife, then you are assuming it wants us to eliminate war, hunger, poverty, loneliness, greed, racism and corruption. But what if we are meant to be transforming into aggressive, self interested conquering machines? In that case the wicked would get rewarded with a sweet afterlife, and the kind would be sent to the hell of reeducation to mean them up a little. > > Shucks, it could be the same place–the worthy have a pleasant experience making things unpleasant for the unworthy. > > - Dang, Ninjad by _that_ much \*Sorry Islamo-Judeo-Christians, the Mongol Hordes were right. \* ---
**Author:** ![BobBitchin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/7ea924/32.png) [@BobBitchin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BobBitchin)\ **Post date:** [July 19, 2019, 4:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-learn-theres-an-afterlife-do-you-change/837298/22 "2019-07-19T16:45:22Z")
With no idea of the scoring system, I don’t change a bit. But, if I had proof of say a christian scoring system…I’ll be at the church bright and early, guitar in hand. ---
**Author:** ![Inigo\_Montoya](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/inigo_montoya/32/124_2.png) [@Inigo\_Montoya](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Inigo_Montoya)\ **Post date:** [July 19, 2019, 5:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-learn-theres-an-afterlife-do-you-change/837298/23 "2019-07-19T17:15:44Z")
> [@QuickSilver](#): > > \*Sorry Islamo-Judeo-Christians, the Mongol Hordes were right. \* Turn to page 0:28 in [your hymnals](https://youtu.be/jM8dCGIm6yc) ---
**Author:** ![phreesh](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/9fc29f/32.png) [@phreesh](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/phreesh)\ **Post date:** [July 19, 2019, 5:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-learn-theres-an-afterlife-do-you-change/837298/24 "2019-07-19T17:27:05Z")
If I knew for CERTAIN that there was an afterlife and that ‘good’ people are rewarded and ‘bad’ people are punished, I would be kinder and more charitable. As MoonMoon said, I would expect a ‘good’ person to act with love and kindness. I don’t live that way today because I need to think of myself and my family. If I spent more time away from my family to help others, that would be less happiness for the people I care about the most in the world. If I gave more of my money away, that would increase the risk that I wouldn’t be able to afford the things that my family and I need and desire. If I knew that there would be 10,000 years of reward/torment associated with my choices, I would be willing to take more risks in my ~100 years on this planet because it would set the stage for the next 10,000. It would be SUPER annoying to discover that 100 years of the pursuit of self-interest and meanness resulted in 10,000 years of pleasure, though. ---
**Author:** ![Grrr](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/grrr/32/146_2.png) [@Grrr](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Grrr)\ **Post date:** [July 19, 2019, 5:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-learn-theres-an-afterlife-do-you-change/837298/25 "2019-07-19T17:46:58Z")
If they’re grading on a curve, I think I’ll be alright. ---
**Author:** ![TreacherousCretin](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/treacherouscretin/32/476_2.png) [@TreacherousCretin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TreacherousCretin)\ **Post date:** [July 19, 2019, 6:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-learn-theres-an-afterlife-do-you-change/837298/26 "2019-07-19T18:44:30Z")
Steve Martin did a short bit about how embarrassing it would be for an atheist to die, only to find himself standing before God at the throne of judgement. (Newly dead atheist speaking, VERY nervously…) “Oh, so it’s real…in college they said this was all bullshit… How many times did I take the Lord’s name in vain?? I don’t know, I didn’t keep count. Oh. _You_ did?.. A MILLION AND SIX TIMES? JESUS CHRIST!” Also: Post #4 speaks for me too. ---
**Author:** ![elfkin477](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/a9a28c/32.png) [@elfkin477](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elfkin477)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2019, 5:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-learn-theres-an-afterlife-do-you-change/837298/27 "2019-07-20T05:15:09Z")
I already live my life as if there’s certainty of an afterlife, so no, I probably wouldn’t change. ---
**Author:** ![Larry\_Borgia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/larry_borgia/32/156_2.png) [@Larry\_Borgia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Larry_Borgia)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2019, 6:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-learn-theres-an-afterlife-do-you-change/837298/28 "2019-07-20T06:00:21Z")
What the heck could I do? I try to be an OK person, and maybe this would inspire me to try harder, and maybe I could rediscover my dormant Lutheranism, but what guarantees do I have? Maybe the only people to get the nice afterlife are Mormons or Muslims or Satanists. Maybe you have to wear a green shirt every Tuesday, or caw every time you see a crow. How could I possibly know? ---
**Author:** ![glee](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/b5a626/32.png) [@glee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/glee)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2019, 6:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-learn-theres-an-afterlife-do-you-change/837298/29 "2019-07-20T06:50:28Z")
> [@Mr\_Shine](#): > > I’m not going to give a scenario because any scenario I come up with will be picked to death. However somehow you learn with 100% certainty: > > [ul] > [li]There is an afterlife[/li][li]Every human gets an afterlife, it’s not opt-outable.[/li][li]Each afterlife will subjectively last 10,000 years before your soul is reduced to oblivion.[/li][li]There is a pleasurable afterlife and a torturous afterlife. These are the only 2 choices.[/li][li]Which afterlife you go to will depend on your life choices whilst alive.[/li][li]You have **absolutely no idea** what metrics are used to determine which afterlife people go to, or the relative percentages.[/li][/ul] Given this list, there’s a strong possibility that an Evil Deity has set things up. So I will carry on trying to be a decent person and not think about the afterlife. At least I will have a clear conscience to comfort me if the worst happens. ---
**Author:** ![mandala](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mandala/32/95_2.png) [@mandala](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mandala)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2019, 4:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-learn-theres-an-afterlife-do-you-change/837298/30 "2019-07-20T16:55:38Z")
This is pretty much the deal already with Islam-Judaism-Christianity. For the OP: I would hunt down the best mediums and pay them to do seances (independent of each other). I would hire people to pay the Ouija board with a list of questions I give them. Then I would collect the data and study it to determine: 1. What are the selection criteria for the pleasurable and painful versions of the afterlife 2. How many people went where; the percentages 3. Try to determine what kind of dumb god ordained this, and how to please/piss him/her off while still alive 4. Publish the findings, in the spirit of fighting ignorance And hopefully I will also get filthy rich and famous. I am surprised we haven’t seen ‘scientific’ research along these lines from the proponents of the above religions, complete with colorful graphs and equations. Would have immense value while pitching Jesus before the skeptical pagan masses. ---
**Author:** ![Der\_Trihs](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/der_trihs/32/233_2.png) [@Der\_Trihs](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Der_Trihs)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2019, 5:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-learn-theres-an-afterlife-do-you-change/837298/31 "2019-07-20T17:57:35Z")
> [@glee](#): > > Given this list, there’s a strong possibility that an Evil Deity has set things up. > So I will carry on trying to be a decent person and not think about the afterlife. > > At least I will have a clear conscience to comfort me if the worst happens. This. It’s unlikely that good deeds will be rewarded; either the entity in question wants to encourage evil or has set things up so that everyone goes to hell. And i refuse to run around raping and murdering just to make an evil god happy. ---
**Author:** ![Tim\_R.Mortiss](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tim_r.mortiss/32/142_2.png) [@Tim\_R.Mortiss](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tim_R.Mortiss)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2019, 8:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-learn-theres-an-afterlife-do-you-change/837298/32 "2019-07-20T20:06:40Z")
If this is anything like the Monty Hall problem, it’s better odds if you change your choice of actions whatever they were. ---
**Author:** ![Chessic\_Sense](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/7c8e57/32.png) [@Chessic\_Sense](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chessic_Sense)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2019, 8:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-learn-theres-an-afterlife-do-you-change/837298/33 "2019-07-20T20:18:27Z")
> [@MoonMoon](#): > > Why not? 😜 > > Because that eliminates war, hunger, poverty, loneliness, greed, racism and corrruption. But what if we eliminate all those things, and we create a perfect world for _nothing_? ---
**Author:** ![Chessic\_Sense](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/7c8e57/32.png) [@Chessic\_Sense](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chessic_Sense)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2019, 8:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-learn-theres-an-afterlife-do-you-change/837298/34 "2019-07-20T20:20:37Z")
I’d place my bet on my afterlife being like my life, as if I got another 10,000 years of whatever my earthly life was. So I’d try to live like I want the afterlife to be. > [@Tim\_R.Mortiss](#): > > If this is anything like the Monty Hall problem, it’s better odds if you change your choice of actions whatever they were. It’s not, so…? ---
**Author:** ![CarnalK](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carnalk/32/486_2.png) [@CarnalK](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CarnalK)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2019, 9:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-learn-theres-an-afterlife-do-you-change/837298/35 "2019-07-20T21:46:30Z")
> [@GuanoLad](#): > > I think of myself as generally a good person. I try to be considerate, helpful, generous, friendly, and diligent. We all make mistakes, and nobody is perfect, and certainly I have had very little good luck in my life, but as a person I think I would pass the test. If how I currently live isn’t enough, then bugger 'em. Well, the bloodthirsty angry gods will no doubt turn that “bugger em” around for the next 10,000 years. Enjoy the fruits of your impudence. ---
**Author:** ![panache45](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/panache45/32/64_2.png) [@panache45](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/panache45)\ **Post date:** [July 21, 2019, 12:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-learn-theres-an-afterlife-do-you-change/837298/36 "2019-07-21T00:23:47Z")
> [@elfkin477](#): > > I already live my life as if there’s certainty of an afterlife, so no, I probably wouldn’t change. Joke’s on you, if you’re wrong. ---
**Author:** ![GuanoLad](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guanolad/32/42_2.png) [@GuanoLad](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GuanoLad)\ **Post date:** [July 21, 2019, 1:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-learn-theres-an-afterlife-do-you-change/837298/37 "2019-07-21T01:26:42Z")
> [@CarnalK](#): > > Well, the bloodthirsty angry gods will no doubt turn that “bugger em” around for the next 10,000 years. Enjoy the fruits of your impudence. None of us have a chance if the Gods are that petty. ---
**Author:** ![tripthicket](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tripthicket/32/297_2.png) [@tripthicket](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tripthicket)\ **Post date:** [July 21, 2019, 8:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-learn-theres-an-afterlife-do-you-change/837298/38 "2019-07-21T08:44:20Z")
It occurs to me that the worldwide suicide rate would go up. 100-ish years of life in this world that we know about, good and bad. Then 100 times that in an afterlife, which has got to be better (if you make it to the right place). Who wouldn’t want to get to that right away? Okay, lots of folks, and it’s rolling the dice anyway that you don’t go down instead of up, but I think there’d be a significant slice of folks who’d want to cut to the chase, as they aren’t finding this life to be all that snazzy, as compared to a dream of what the afterlife may actually be. ---
**Author:** ![Nava](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/da6949/32.png) [@Nava](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nava)\ **Post date:** [July 21, 2019, 9:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-learn-theres-an-afterlife-do-you-change/837298/39 "2019-07-21T09:06:44Z")
> [@MoonMoon](#): > > Why not? 😜 > > Because that eliminates war, hunger, poverty, loneliness, greed, racism and corrruption. No it doesn’t. You specified “acting from love”. I have a mother whose heart is stored in her wallet, next to the second thing she loves best; the first thing she loves best is herself. I have coworkers/clients whose love of power and secrecy is a continuous obstacle to the work and stress levels of their coworkers. Many people’s xenophobia is linked to a concept of the world where loving your people inevitably requires hating those who are not; they’re usually the same people who think\* that the world is a zero-sum game in all things and who can therefore not conceive of any kind of win-win situation. My Granfather From Hell’s love of fucking was directly linked to his sexual assaults or rapes of multiple people: his love of self-gratification trumped his respect for anybody. “Acting from love” isn’t particularly good when the love itself or the loved thing are bad. - For a very loose usage of “think”. ---
**Author:** ![Mijin](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mijin/32/9369_2.png) [@Mijin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mijin)\ **Post date:** [July 21, 2019, 9:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-learn-theres-an-afterlife-do-you-change/837298/40 "2019-07-21T09:11:11Z")
I don’t think there’s really any wiggle-room with this hypothetical. I generally like to think of myself as a good person – I give to charity, I help others when I can, I try to fight bigotry, injustice and so on. But if I knew for sure there are two afterlives, one good one bad, I’d probably give up all my possessions and spend the rest of my mortal life building schools or looking after people with ebola say. It would be too much of a coincidence for reality to line up so well with the mythology of religions like Christianity, so I’d be willing to bet “be good” would be the way into the good afterlife, and suicide wouldn’t cut it. And it’s not the sort of thing I would want to risk with “Meh, I think I’m good enough now”. disclaimer: I’m an atheist, so just speaking hypothetically [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-learn-theres-an-afterlife-do-you-change/837298.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-learn-theres-an-afterlife-do-you-change/837298.md?page=3)