# You lose an eye. Eye patch? Glass eye? Other? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [October 8, 2010, 5:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-lose-an-eye-eye-patch-glass-eye-other/556517 "2010-10-08T17:17:03Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![davidm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/davidm/32/225_2.png) [@davidm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/davidm)\ **Post date:** [October 8, 2010, 9:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-lose-an-eye-eye-patch-glass-eye-other/556517/21 "2010-10-08T21:47:32Z")
Maybe you could sell ad space on it. A Nike logo or something. ---
**Author:** ![Otara](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/a88e4f/32.png) [@Otara](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Otara)\ **Post date:** [October 8, 2010, 9:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-lose-an-eye-eye-patch-glass-eye-other/556517/22 "2010-10-08T21:50:56Z")
Insect eye of course. ---
**Author:** ![Inigo\_Montoya](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/inigo_montoya/32/124_2.png) [@Inigo\_Montoya](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Inigo_Montoya)\ **Post date:** [October 8, 2010, 10:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-lose-an-eye-eye-patch-glass-eye-other/556517/23 "2010-10-08T22:24:26Z")
Eye patch. There was a mom at my kids’ school who was having eye trouble and had to cover her eye for a while. She could have gone with a bandage but instead she went with an embroidered black patch. It was much hotter that I would have imagined. She looked pretty plain without it. ---
**Author:** ![Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ecccb3/32.png) [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skald_the_Rhymer)\ **Post date:** [October 8, 2010, 10:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-lose-an-eye-eye-patch-glass-eye-other/556517/24 "2010-10-08T22:26:48Z")
Assuming I can find a way to avoid infection, I’d be tempted to go au naturel at times, the better to freak people out. It’d speed up my passage through the line at McDonald’s. ---
**Author:** ![hogarth](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/hogarth/32/1773_2.png) [@hogarth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/hogarth)\ **Post date:** [October 8, 2010, 10:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-lose-an-eye-eye-patch-glass-eye-other/556517/25 "2010-10-08T22:27:01Z")
I’d go for the Eye of Rhynn, if it was available. Otherwise, just a normal glass eye. ---
**Author:** ![Critical1](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/3e96dc/32.png) [@Critical1](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Critical1)\ **Post date:** [October 8, 2010, 10:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-lose-an-eye-eye-patch-glass-eye-other/556517/26 "2010-10-08T22:39:46Z")
I would have a few patches and a good dozen eyes, I love the idea of making it a functional camera. having seen what an hd webcam looks like torn apart I would guess you might even be able to get an hd eyeball. battery might be the limit though. at least one of the eyes would have that cartoon X, then I could wear the patch over the other eye while napping to freak people out. ---
**Author:** ![BomTek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bomtek/32/21364_2.png) [@BomTek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BomTek)\ **Post date:** [October 8, 2010, 10:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-lose-an-eye-eye-patch-glass-eye-other/556517/27 "2010-10-08T22:43:07Z")
Threads like this are a big part of the reason I love the SDMB. Now I’m finding myself half-wishing I’d lose an eye somehow so I could rotate among a series of eye patches and glass or functional eyes. Is that weird? ---
**Author:** ![Regallag\_The\_Axe](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/regallag_the_axe/32/445_2.png) [@Regallag\_The\_Axe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Regallag_The_Axe)\ **Post date:** [October 8, 2010, 10:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-lose-an-eye-eye-patch-glass-eye-other/556517/28 "2010-10-08T22:55:36Z")
I have thought about this. First of all, if I do lose an eye, I hope it’s the left one, because that one sucks. As for what I’d replace it with, I’ve got a couple of good ideas. Idea one: A bottle opener. No more looking for around, or carrying one with me all the time. Just jam that sucker in the empty socket and give it a pull. Idea two: A glass eye that is a negative image of my real eye. A white pupil, a black white, an orange-red iris. I could close my real eye, give people the _STARE OF DOOM_, except, I wouldn’t be able to see if I did that, so they could just walk away from the _STARE_. Idea three: An eye patch over idea one or two. I could take it off whenever I want to freak someone out/open a beer. Of course if I wore an eye patch I’d have to keep my head shaved and get a bad-ass scar across my face. That last one probably wouldn’t be a problem, because anything likely to lose me an eye would also gain me a scar. ---
**Author:** ![Steophan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/steophan/32/9595_2.png) [@Steophan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Steophan)\ **Post date:** [October 8, 2010, 11:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-lose-an-eye-eye-patch-glass-eye-other/556517/29 "2010-10-08T23:06:43Z")
Eyepatch. I already have the cowboy hat, I might as well go the full Rooster Cogburn! ---
**Author:** ![davidm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/davidm/32/225_2.png) [@davidm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/davidm)\ **Post date:** [October 8, 2010, 11:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-lose-an-eye-eye-patch-glass-eye-other/556517/30 "2010-10-08T23:30:07Z")
How about a mirrored one that reflects back a fish-eye view of the surroundings? ---
**Author:** ![Unintentionally\_Blank](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/unintentionally_blank/32/5418_2.png) [@Unintentionally\_Blank](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Unintentionally_Blank)\ **Post date:** [October 8, 2010, 11:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-lose-an-eye-eye-patch-glass-eye-other/556517/31 "2010-10-08T23:34:06Z")
Satellite Dish. ---
**Author:** ![6ImpossibleThingsB4Breakfast](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/6/e19adc/32.png) [@6ImpossibleThingsB4Breakfast](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/6ImpossibleThingsB4Breakfast)\ **Post date:** [October 9, 2010, 12:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-lose-an-eye-eye-patch-glass-eye-other/556517/32 "2010-10-09T00:17:21Z")
Prosthetic eye with a pair of scissors sticking out of it. ---
**Author:** ![Regallag\_The\_Axe](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/regallag_the_axe/32/445_2.png) [@Regallag\_The\_Axe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Regallag_The_Axe)\ **Post date:** [October 9, 2010, 12:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-lose-an-eye-eye-patch-glass-eye-other/556517/33 "2010-10-09T00:32:04Z")
I thought of another one! A tiny gun, like a little revolver, just sticking out of my eye socket. The only serious drawback I can see is that I wouldn’t be able to resist the temptation to overuse the obvious jokes, and they would get obnoxious. ---
**Author:** ![Satchmo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/satchmo/32/4223_2.png) [@Satchmo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Satchmo)\ **Post date:** [October 9, 2010, 12:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-lose-an-eye-eye-patch-glass-eye-other/556517/34 "2010-10-09T00:50:08Z")
> [@tdn](#): > > I never pass up an opportunity to look like a pirate. Arrrr! Sure and ye stole me idea! Okay, I’ll steal from Peter Falk, I’d get a glass eye with a built-in twinkle! ---
**Author:** ![MeanOldLady](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/meanoldlady/32/10737_2.png) [@MeanOldLady](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MeanOldLady)\ **Post date:** [October 9, 2010, 1:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-lose-an-eye-eye-patch-glass-eye-other/556517/35 "2010-10-09T01:21:30Z")
This needs to be a poll, public, so that I can pity the fool that doesn’t say eye patch. ---
**Author:** ![GuanoLad](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guanolad/32/42_2.png) [@GuanoLad](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GuanoLad)\ **Post date:** [October 9, 2010, 1:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-lose-an-eye-eye-patch-glass-eye-other/556517/36 "2010-10-09T01:33:58Z")
Terminator eye, with a red LED. Or [this](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TeOxhiNfFyU). ---
**Author:** ![blondebear](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/blondebear/32/1022_2.png) [@blondebear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/blondebear)\ **Post date:** [October 9, 2010, 1:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-lose-an-eye-eye-patch-glass-eye-other/556517/37 "2010-10-09T01:34:51Z")
I would use my socket as a storage area for small snack items. ---
**Author:** ![Regallag\_The\_Axe](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/regallag_the_axe/32/445_2.png) [@Regallag\_The\_Axe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Regallag_The_Axe)\ **Post date:** [October 9, 2010, 2:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-lose-an-eye-eye-patch-glass-eye-other/556517/38 "2010-10-09T02:05:49Z")
> [@blondebear](#): > > I would use my socket as a storage area for small snack items. Well, you know what they say… everything tastes better after it’s been jammed into a human skull! ---
**Author:** ![AnnaKareninja](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/3be4f8/32.png) [@AnnaKareninja](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AnnaKareninja)\ **Post date:** [October 9, 2010, 2:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-lose-an-eye-eye-patch-glass-eye-other/556517/39 "2010-10-09T02:52:46Z")
I’d get a custom made jack-in-the-box, alien on a spring installed. It’d be like something out of Alien: instead of it bursting out of my chest, it’d burst out my eye on command. Great for breaking the ice, one-upping someone on the “well, my parasitic thing-of-the-week is bigger…SPROING!”, and scaring the bejeezus out of small children. ---
**Author:** ![Roderick\_Femm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/roderick_femm/32/14875_2.png) [@Roderick\_Femm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Roderick_Femm)\ **Post date:** [October 9, 2010, 5:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-lose-an-eye-eye-patch-glass-eye-other/556517/40 "2010-10-09T05:20:41Z")
I was thinking something a little more gothic, like Charles Laughton’s right eye makeup as Quasimodo, seen [here](http://www.dvdbeaver.com/film/Reviews/hbnd/quasimodo%20whipped%20closeup.jpg). Of course, it would be a prosthetic that I could take off, but still, I’ve always been strangely drawn to the droopy side of his face. It might add some time to my morning routine, however, to get properly made up every day. Roddy [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-lose-an-eye-eye-patch-glass-eye-other/556517.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-lose-an-eye-eye-patch-glass-eye-other/556517.md?page=3)