# You Mexican Bastard

**URL:** <https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-mexican-bastard/405229>\
**Category:** The BBQ Pit\
**Created:** [May 23, 2007, 3:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-mexican-bastard/405229 "2007-05-23T15:36:17Z")\
**Posts on this page:** 20\
**Page:** 6

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**Author:** ![JKellyMap](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jkellymap/32/15880_2.png) [@JKellyMap](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JKellyMap)\
**Post date:** [May 24, 2007, 10:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-mexican-bastard/405229/101 "2007-05-24T10:54:49Z")

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[QUOTE=mhendo]  
The title, by itself, _might_ give some people pause, but when read in conjunction with the actual story, tells us nothing about how the OP views the world except that he doesn’t like to be lied to and taken for a fool by his employees.  
[/QUOTE]

Fair enough. First post that didn’t disappoint me. (I’m especially saddened by Colibri. If I wrote a column about how Colibri was a pretentious asshole who cared more about birds than people\*, AND I happened to know that he was Jewish\*\*, should I title my thread “You Jewish asshole?”. If you were “wondering all along how long it would take for some stupid offenderati to come along”, then you are admitting right there that there was something a bit unusual about the choice of words in this thread title.)

Last thing – Don’t diss me for highjacking, because half my original (short) post in this thread was about an anecdote from my own life much like the OP’s.

\*Not a hypothetical, apparently. \*\*A hypothetical.

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**Author:** ![bbs2k](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/e495f1/32.png) [@bbs2k](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bbs2k)\
**Post date:** [May 24, 2007, 11:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-mexican-bastard/405229/102 "2007-05-24T11:06:34Z")

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:: reads thread title ::

:: loses monocle ::

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**Author:** ![Dead\_Badger](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/848f3c/32.png) [@Dead\_Badger](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dead_Badger)\
**Post date:** [May 24, 2007, 11:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-mexican-bastard/405229/103 "2007-05-24T11:50:27Z")

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[QUOTE=JKellyMap]  
If I wrote a column about how Colibri was a pretentious asshole who cared more about birds than people\*, AND I happened to know that he was Jewish\*\*, should I title my thread “You Jewish asshole?”.  
[/QUOTE]  
Only if his Jewishness was integral to the actual story. Y’know, as Avi’s nationality was to this one. Which makes this another entry for the “Bleeding Stupid Analogy” awards, I’m afraid, although it’s nice to get a nomination that isn’t from a filesharing thread.

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**Author:** ![Shirley\_Ujest](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/45deac/32.png) [@Shirley\_Ujest](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shirley_Ujest)\
**Post date:** [May 24, 2007, 12:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-mexican-bastard/405229/104 "2007-05-24T12:00:31Z")

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As someone who thumbs her very white/anglo/honkie/gringo/celtic nose at the tribal chest thumping that routinely goes on (her and in the Big Scary Real World) I would like to state on the last census I put down that I was a Haisidic Jew Fiji Islander. I am whiter than wonder bread, people.  
[See here](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Brandon_Township,_Michigan) I am .1 of our fair population.

But I speak rearry good engrish, oi vey.

Offenderati is my new favoritist word.

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**Author:** ![fisha](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/da6949/32.png) [@fisha](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/fisha)\
**Post date:** [May 24, 2007, 12:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-mexican-bastard/405229/105 "2007-05-24T12:25:38Z")

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What the hell is

“I wish you into the cornfield.”

Eh?

ETA, fuck you, I wish you into the orange grove, motherfucker.

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**Author:** ![Frank](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/3d9bf3/32.png) [@Frank](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Frank)\
**Post date:** [May 24, 2007, 1:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-mexican-bastard/405229/106 "2007-05-24T13:25:40Z")

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[QUOTE=dahfisheroo]  
What the hell is

“I wish you into the cornfield.”

Eh?  
[/QUOTE]

[It’s a _Good_ Life](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/It's_a_Good_Life_(The_Twilight_Zone))

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**Author:** ![Little\_Plastic\_Ninja](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/f07891/32.png) [@Little\_Plastic\_Ninja](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Little_Plastic_Ninja)\
**Post date:** [May 24, 2007, 2:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-mexican-bastard/405229/107 "2007-05-24T14:57:13Z")

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[QUOTE=Dead Badger]  
Only if his Jewishness was integral to the actual story. Y’know, as Avi’s nationality was to this one. Which makes this another entry for the “Bleeding Stupid Analogy” awards, I’m afraid, although it’s nice to get a nomination that isn’t from a filesharing thread.  
[/QUOTE]

Now if he’d been taking away everyone’s BLTs and then hoarding them for himself…

Honestly, is anyone offended here actually of Mexican descent? Look, I’m a fat bitch, and if someone started complaining about some fat bitch taking up two and a half seats on an airplane and dribbling her french fry grease on him and started a thread entitled “Fat Bitch, get your own seat!” I would say “Hell yeah, buddy, what an insufferable jerk she was.”

and then she declawed a cat and let it run around outside

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**Author:** ![descamisado](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e480ec/32.png) [@descamisado](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/descamisado)\
**Post date:** [May 24, 2007, 2:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-mexican-bastard/405229/108 "2007-05-24T14:59:59Z")

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[QUOTE=Shirley Ujest]  
As someone who thumbs her very white/anglo/honkie/gringo/celtic nose at the tribal chest thumping that routinely goes on (her and in the Big Scary Real World) I would like to state on the last census I put down that I was a Haisidic Jew Fiji Islander. I am whiter than wonder bread, people.  
[See here](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Brandon_Township,_Michigan) I am .1 of our fair population.

But I speak rearry good engrish, oi vey.

Offenderati is my new **favoritist** word.  
[/QUOTE]  
Did you mean “favoritest”? Although this could work here too. 😃

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**Author:** ![Cowboy8467](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/b5e925/32.png) [@Cowboy8467](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cowboy8467)\
**Post date:** [May 24, 2007, 3:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-mexican-bastard/405229/109 "2007-05-24T15:12:27Z")

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Well I’m half Mexican and I didn’t take any offense at the OP’s title so take that for what it’s worth

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**Author:** ![Contrapuntal](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/e274bd/32.png) [@Contrapuntal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Contrapuntal)\
**Post date:** [May 24, 2007, 4:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-mexican-bastard/405229/110 "2007-05-24T16:02:38Z")

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[QUOTE=Cowboy8467]  
Well I’m half Mexican and I didn’t take any offense at the OP’s title so take that for what it’s worth  
[/QUOTE]  
Probably because your Mexican half no habla engalis.

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**Author:** ![Quint](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/q/76d3ee/32.png) [@Quint](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Quint)\
**Post date:** [May 24, 2007, 5:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-mexican-bastard/405229/111 "2007-05-24T17:02:31Z")

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[QUOTE=A Monkey With a Gun]  
_edited for brevity_…Sometimes I use one of my days off to work for my girlfriend’s nursery/ landscaping company…  
Avi, that fucking bastard. Avi’s new and moved in with Antonio about a month ago. Antonio got him the job and Avi doesn’t speak any English. \*\*When I tell him to do something he looks at me quizzically and shrugs his shoulders. \*\*

[/QUOTE]

I dunno… if I had a job where the owner’s honey showed up from time to time and tried to tell me what to do, I’d pretty much do the same. You admit to not being his boss, but you want him to do what you tell him? Would you do something he tells you to do? He is in no position to tell you “Fuck off, I’m not your bitch!” since you’re shagging the owner, so he shrugs and ignores your requests. Next time you are at work, try acting like Avi’s coworker instead of someone above him on the food-chain and see if his communication skills improve.

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**Author:** ![Bosstone](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/22d042/32.png) [@Bosstone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bosstone)\
**Post date:** [May 24, 2007, 5:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-mexican-bastard/405229/112 "2007-05-24T17:26:54Z")

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:dubious: You might try reading the lines written, **Quint** , instead of between them.

Telling Avi to do something could very well have been no more than “Hey, hand me that shovel.”

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**Author:** ![rhythmonly](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/ee59a6/32.png) [@rhythmonly](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/rhythmonly)\
**Post date:** [May 24, 2007, 7:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-mexican-bastard/405229/113 "2007-05-24T19:00:38Z")

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My own speaking of spanish is limited, but I find it helpful to suddenly say “Don’t shoot! Marry my sister!” when faced with those awkward social situations where a language barrier is involved.

I also like to respond in japanese when confronted with a hispanic that refuses to habla englaise.

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**Author:** ![Quint](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/q/76d3ee/32.png) [@Quint](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Quint)\
**Post date:** [May 24, 2007, 11:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-mexican-bastard/405229/114 "2007-05-24T23:45:10Z")

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[QUOTE=BayleDomon]  
:dubious: You might try reading the lines written, **Quint** , instead of between them.

Telling Avi to do something could very well have been no more than “Hey, hand me that shovel.”  
[/QUOTE]

I don’t think I’m reading between the lines. Avi does what Antonio, the crew cheif tells him, but not what Mr Ownerfucker tells him.That’s the complaint from the OP. I don’t think the extent of what Antonio tells him to do is “Hand me that shovel.” You **BayleDomon** might try reading a little more closely before pointing fingers. :dubious:

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**Author:** ![eleanorigby](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/ee7513/32.png) [@eleanorigby](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/eleanorigby)\
**Post date:** [May 25, 2007, 12:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-mexican-bastard/405229/115 "2007-05-25T00:43:46Z")

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[QUOTE=Frank]  
[It’s a _Good_ Life](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/It's_a_Good_Life_(The_Twilight_Zone))  
[/QUOTE]

Is that related at all to _Children of the Corn_ etc? Just curious.  
Re the OP. Hmm… let’s sum up:

1. Guy works with people of Hispanic heritage/actual Hispanics from Central America, specifically Mexico.

2. Co-worker tried to pull a fast one on him.

3. Guy is caught in the act.

Putting these three elements together the guy is Mexican and a bastard.

Yup: Mexican Bastard it is.  
Now, if this were taking place in Minnesota and the bastard was Norwegian… 😛

**Mr Bus Guy** –you have just confirmed something for me. The Mexican lawn crew that our next door neighbor had hired (back when I was a teenager) used to peak through the bushes at me when I was sun-bathing. They would talk to each other in Spanish, but lecherous remarks have the same tonal quality no matter the language. Creeped the hell outta me (I’m sure they still would have done so if they had been Lithuanian–is everyone happy now?)  
Offenderati have too much time on their hands.

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**Author:** ![Frank](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/3d9bf3/32.png) [@Frank](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Frank)\
**Post date:** [May 25, 2007, 12:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-mexican-bastard/405229/116 "2007-05-25T00:50:11Z")

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[QUOTE=eleanorigby]  
Is that related at all to _Children of the Corn_ etc? Just curious.  
[/QUOTE]

No, not at all.

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**Author:** ![eleanorigby](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/ee7513/32.png) [@eleanorigby](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/eleanorigby)\
**Post date:** [May 25, 2007, 1:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-mexican-bastard/405229/117 "2007-05-25T01:08:46Z")

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[QUOTE=Frank]  
No, not at all.  
[/QUOTE]

But now I am creeped out by cornfields! This is problematic, since I live in IL…  
I think I will use that phrase as a threat to my kids. See what happens. (they think I’m nuts anyway).

🙂

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<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![TokyoBayer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tokyobayer/32/13989_2.png) [@TokyoBayer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TokyoBayer)\
**Post date:** [May 25, 2007, 1:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-mexican-bastard/405229/118 "2007-05-25T01:49:53Z")

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Yup, my Japanese level goes waaaaay down when I talk to cops who pull me over for something.

For the OP, what an ass. It’s one thing to do this to get out of a ticket, but he’s got to continue working with you.

Does remind me about the Russian(?) joke where the workers say their bosses pretent to pay them so they pretend to work.

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**Author:** ![Bosstone](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/22d042/32.png) [@Bosstone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bosstone)\
**Post date:** [May 25, 2007, 1:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-mexican-bastard/405229/119 "2007-05-25T01:56:17Z")

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[QUOTE=Quint]  
I don’t think I’m reading between the lines. Avi does what Antonio, the crew cheif tells him, but not what Mr Ownerfucker tells him.That’s the complaint from the OP. I don’t think the extent of what Antonio tells him to do is “Hand me that shovel.” You **BayleDomon** might try reading a little more closely before pointing fingers. :dubious:  
[/QUOTE]  
Bahaha. You’re managing to infer from the OP that **AMWAG** is trying to boss the crew around like he’s a bigshot, and you’re telling me not to point fingers. There’s always gotta be one in every thread, I guess. Carry on with your psychic self.

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<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![Quint](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/q/76d3ee/32.png) [@Quint](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Quint)\
**Post date:** [May 25, 2007, 2:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-mexican-bastard/405229/120 "2007-05-25T02:26:05Z")

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[QUOTE=BayleDomon]  
Bahaha. You’re managing to infer from the OP that **AMWAG** is trying to boss the crew around like he’s a bigshot, and you’re telling me not to point fingers. There’s always gotta be one in every thread, I guess. Carry on with your psychic self.  
[/QUOTE]

OK, look here fucknugget, here’s a snippet from the OP:

[QUOTE=A Monkey With a Gun]  
When I tell him to do something he looks at me quizzically and shrugs his shoulders. I was cool with that at first, 'cause he does what Antonio tells him, but then I started to suspect something. I’m not the stupid gringo this guy was trying to play me for.  
[/QUOTE]

Now, do I know for a fact that **AMWAG** is showing up on the jobsite and being the big bossman? No, I do not. I am not acting like I am psychic, just reading for comprehension, something you are clearly too stupid to do. I simply suggested that this could be the source of the problem. I **SUGGESTED** this, never said it was the case. So **BayleDomon** , eat my dump.

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