# You too can be possessed by demons! **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [January 4, 2004, 8:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-too-can-be-possessed-by-demons/222690 "2004-01-04T20:01:26Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 15\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![TelcontarStorm](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/3ab097/32.png) [@TelcontarStorm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TelcontarStorm)\ **Post date:** [January 7, 2004, 1:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-too-can-be-possessed-by-demons/222690/41 "2004-01-07T13:43:59Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Jaade \* > \*\*\*1 point per candle, \*\* > 15 > > **extra point if they are paisley or shaped like frogs, owls, shamrocks, or if they have symbols from “other” cultures/religions.** > 6 At least half a dozen of these are dressed with sybols used in Wicca > > \*\*If you own paisley– > > shirts 5 points > socks 1 point > ties 3 points > pants 5 points > cutains 10 points > bedsheets 20 points \*\* > 20 Quilt with many different patterns in the squares. > \ ***2 points if you have a horseshoe in your house for luck. As a matter of fact, 2 points for any symbols of luck in your home. 5 points if they are made from jade.** > 2 -cat tea pot with right paw riased pointing toward the front door (Do I get an extra point as it is oriental?) > > \ ***1 point per Harry Potter book or store bought paraphenlia. 5 points if you saw the movies in the theater. 10 points per child if you took children. 20 points per DVD or VHS tape.** > 43 1 DVD, 1 VHS, 2 copies of OotP and 1 PoA > > \ ***3 points per doll or stuffed animal.** > 45- Does the fact that there’s an elvish Garfield net me a bit? > > \ ***10 points if it’s a Barbie.** > 10. EEEvil Xmas! > > \ ***17 points per Troll doll.** > Big 0 there > > **1 point per rock ‘n’ roll song that can be played in your home.** > JAYZEEZUS… I cannot begin to total this one! The cassette collection alone of my two roommates is enough to blow a mind, let alone the Cd’s owned by teenagers! > > **5 points for death metal.** > Damn skippy… See above > > **1 point per Book of Mormon or “books on other religions”, but 10 points for the satanic bible.** > 4, not counting my personal B.O.S.s. Does Stranger in a Strange Land count? > > \ ***10 points for items used in witchcraft.** > 200 Here’s where I count the B.O.S.s However there will be _no_ double counting of the candles. > > **6 points for any demons you have invited into your home.** > Does the ADHD cat count? > > **20 points if you visit a witchdoctor for your ailments.** > 20 for homopathic medicines, there’s an old bottle of Enchinea somewhere around here, I bought when I had a reoccuring bladder infection. > > **1 point for Lawry’s seasoned salt.** > 1 and I ain’t giving it up! The Pork needs it badly. But, however if you’re doing this just for the spirals, I think the Lion King parephenalia I have around has to net me at least 6 points. > > **7 points for the possession of mah-jongg tiles.** > 14. I own 4 different versions either for the computer or the Sega Genisis. > > **3 points for owning birthstones.** > 0 > > **10 points for dreamcatchers.** > 20 > > **7 points for pictures of Guardian Angels. (_with demonic faces in their wings_)** > 0 But, LittleTel gave me a picture of a Puma, One of my personal totems to watch over me. > > **5 points per perfume or cologne bottle you own.** > 50. What about the leftover Avon samples? > > **1/2 point per Proctor and Gamble product (come on people, you already knew about Proctor and Gamble, I’ll not have you boosting your scores so easily!)** > 0 Generics rule here > > \*\*Happy counting! > > ~J \*\* 1. (w/o the massive R&R collection, which no doubt dooms us all) I am Wicca and the Goddess incarnate. I am sooooo going to the Summerlands! Looking forward to seeing you all there. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![ralph124c](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/8797f3/32.png) [@ralph124c](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ralph124c)\ **Post date:** [January 7, 2004, 3:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-too-can-be-possessed-by-demons/222690/42 "2004-01-07T15:16:00Z")
According to the Bible, the world is FULL od demons (“we are legion”).so why is demonic posession so rare? After all, SATAN’s minions are always looking to snare humans…so why don’t we see this happening every day? ---
**Author:** ![silenus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/silenus/32/166_2.png) [@silenus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/silenus)\ **Post date:** [January 7, 2004, 6:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-too-can-be-possessed-by-demons/222690/43 "2004-01-07T18:42:22Z")
Well, since I own a record/tape/cd collection that outweighs that of any three radio stations you could name… I am an agent of Satan. But the duties are largely ceremonial. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Morrigoon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/858c86/32.png) [@Morrigoon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Morrigoon)\ **Post date:** [January 9, 2004, 4:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-too-can-be-possessed-by-demons/222690/44 "2004-01-09T04:48:56Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Jaade \* > \*\* > \*1 point per candle, extra point if they are paisley or shaped like frogs, owls, shamrocks, or if they have symbols from “other” cultures/religions. > **Okay umm… is that per candle or per wick? I have two candles, but one of them has three wicks - is that 4 points?** > > If you own paisley– > > shirts 5 points > socks 1 point > ties 3 points > pants 5 points > cutains 10 points > bedsheets 20 points > **nope, no paisley** > > \*2 points if you have a horseshoe in your house for luck. As a matter of fact, 2 points for any symbols of luck in your home. 5 points if they are made from jade. > **bloody heck, none of that stuff** > > \*1 point per Harry Potter book or store bought paraphenlia. 5 points if you saw the movies in the theater. 10 points per child if you took children. 20 points per DVD or VHS tape. > **Aha, finally some points here. 4 HP books (4pts), one HP scarf (not sure if it counts, it’s technically a USC scarf but even the SC bookstore acknowledges it as the Potter scarf - 1 point?), is that 5 points per movie seen in the theater? How about per visit? b/c that nets me 15 points, and an additional 20 for dragging the niece and nephew along. 2 DVDs (40 pts) > I’m up to 64 points** > \*3 points per doll or stuffed animal. > **darn demon-free campus housing…** > > \*10 points if it’s a Barbie. > **blech, even I knew she was the devil’s spawn…** > > \*17 points per Troll doll. > **Nope again… man…** > > 1 point per rock ‘n’ roll song that can be played in your home. > \*\*Ah here we go… I probably rack up at least 100 points here, if not more (most of my d/l ing is broadway… whoops) > > 5 points for death metal. > **nope again, what am I, a saint?** > > 1 point per Book of Mormon or “books on other religions”, but 10 points for the satanic bible. > **Ack… only the real bible here. Can I get points for books on the stock market instead?** > \*10 points for items used in witchcraft. > **Uhh… I feign ignorance here** > > 6 points for any demons you have invited into your home. > **I don’t make a habit of inviting demons 'round for tea… can I get points for my gay best friend instead?** > > 20 points if you visit a witchdoctor for your ailments. > **Is this THEIR definition of a witchdoctor? B/c that seems to encompass just about everyone in the medical profession. And those campus docs… whew! I’m taking 20 points for this one.** > > 1 point for Lawry’s seasoned salt. > **Yay! 1 point for meeeeee** > > 7 points for the possession of mah-jongg tiles. > **I must be the most boring person on the planet. Disney Monopoly, yes. Mah Jongg, no.** > > 3 points for owning birthstones. > **Where did that ring go? Well, it’s probably in a box in my mother’s garage, not here.** > > 10 points for dreamcatchers. > **nope again… this is really sad** > > 7 points for pictures of Guardian Angels. (_with demonic faces in their wings_) > _ **sigh** _ > > 5 points per perfume or cologne bottle you own. > **Finally! Okay, 10 points** > > 1/2 point per Proctor and Gamble product (come on people, you already knew about Proctor and Gamble, I’ll not have you boosting your scores so easily!) > **Hell if I know. Guessing none.** > > \*Double your points if you’ve given any of these items out at Halloween. (In other words, if you gave someone a candle of an owl on Halloween, you get 4 points. 1 for the candle, one because it was an owl, and double that for giving it on Halloween.) > **(checking herself for a pulse)** > Happy counting! > > ~J \*\* Okay, so I don’t really feel like digging through my folders to count the rock songs. Suffice it to say, it’s between 100 and 200 somewhere. 95 points before music. How boring my life must be… ---
**Author:** ![DogMom](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e9c0ed/32.png) [@DogMom](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DogMom)\ **Post date:** [January 9, 2004, 3:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-too-can-be-possessed-by-demons/222690/45 "2004-01-09T15:25:34Z")
Whoa. Let’s see: DogDad _makes_ candles, CurrentDog alone has more stuffies than ToysRUs ™ (and that doesn’t include my stuffy collection OR DogDad’s), We have enough oil lamps & oil candles to make the house look like we’ve got at least 2 150-watt bulbs burning in every room of the house _when there’s a power outage_, we both collect “alternative religion” texts as well as different translations of the Bible, Apocrypha, and Pseudopigrepha, we have two 200-CD folders that are FULL, mostly of R&R and some Heavy Metal though I’m not sure about the Death Metal thing, plus various smaller collections of CDs (mostly Beatles & stuff though, which while evil aren’t on The List) and I have my birthstone set in my engagement ring which is welded to my wedding ring. Which NEVER EVER comes off my hand. Oh, and we have every HP book, every HP AUDIObook, saw both movies on opening night (and harassed the local “HP is EEEEEEVIL” group both times) at the opening show at the local theater, and we own both on DVD. AND I crocheted DogDad a “Harry Potter” scarf in Gryffindor’s colors last year. Well. I guess I’m not so much GOING to hell as I am currently HOSTING it. That explains the Sulfur & Brimstone Pit in the computer room, I suppose… ---
**Author:** ![DogMom](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e9c0ed/32.png) [@DogMom](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DogMom)\ **Post date:** [January 9, 2004, 3:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-too-can-be-possessed-by-demons/222690/46 "2004-01-09T15:44:48Z")
Oh, geez, I missed the whole “owls by themselves are BAD BAD things”. I collect owl stuff. I have boxes and boxes of them. I have an owl clock. I have owl saltshakers. I have stuff I don’t have room to put up and I have to get and install a BUNCH of shelving for. I have owl pictures on my computer desktop. I have a ceramic owl on my computer at work, too. You know, I’m surprised my house hasn’t just VANISHED in a puff of sulfur. ---
**Author:** ![paulberserker](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/c4cdca/32.png) [@paulberserker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/paulberserker)\ **Post date:** [January 9, 2004, 4:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-too-can-be-possessed-by-demons/222690/47 "2004-01-09T16:20:54Z")
I think there are about 4-5 candles in my house. I don’t have anyhting else on the list apart from about 300 rock & roll/death metal albums, which bumps me well into the 1000s I would imagine. does designing a range of Harry Potter watches & clocks for the 3rd film count as demons? if so, i’m screwed. big time. JK Rowling’s a demon, IMO ---
**Author:** ![Balance](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ccd318/32.png) [@Balance](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Balance)\ **Post date:** [January 9, 2004, 10:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-too-can-be-possessed-by-demons/222690/48 "2004-01-09T22:56:06Z")
\ ***1 point per candle, extra point if they are paisley or shaped like frogs, owls, shamrocks, or if they have symbols from “other” cultures/religions.** 200-- Like the abovementioned **DogDad** , I make candles. Many of them are marked with pentagrams, trigrams, or kanji (the last being part of my effort to learn Japanese). I also have lots of candles made by others. 30–Bonus points for giving away candles on Halloween. \*\*If you own paisley– shirts 5 points socks 1 point ties 3 points pants 5 points cutains 10 points bedsheets 20 points \*\* 0–No paisley for me. \ ***2 points if you have a horseshoe in your house for luck. As a matter of fact, 2 points for any symbols of luck in your home. 5 points if they are made from jade.** 10–Various luck charms accumulated over the years, including a ward-stone, which should probably count extra for its Faerie connection. \ ***1 point per Harry Potter book or store bought paraphenlia. 5 points if you saw the movies in the theater. 10 points per child if you took children. 20 points per DVD or VHS tape.** 95 \ ***3 points per doll or stuffed animal.** 21–But I think I should get extra points for the mummy and her cat. \ ***10 points if it’s a Barbie.** \*\*\*17 points per Troll doll. \*\* **1 point per rock ‘n’ roll song that can be played in your home.** 1. **5 points for death metal.** **1 point per Book of Mormon or “books on other religions”, but 10 points for the satanic bible.** 10 \ ***10 points for items used in witchcraft.** 80 \*\*6 points for any demons you have invited into your home. 20 points if you visit a witchdoctor for your ailments.\*\* 20–I _knew_ that ear infection was going to come back to haunt me. \*\*1 point for Lawry’s seasoned salt. \*\* 0–I prefer Chachere’s **7 points for the possession of mah-jongg tiles.** 0 **3 points for owning birthstones.** 3–Not mine (I detest aquamarine), but others. **10 points for dreamcatchers.** 10–Just finished making one. **7 points for pictures of Guardian Angels. (_with demonic faces in their wings_)** 0 **5 points per perfume or cologne bottle you own.** 15 **1/2 point per Proctor and Gamble product (come on people, you already knew about Proctor and Gamble, I’ll not have you boosting your scores so easily!)** 5–Total WAG here, but probably close. \***Double your points if you’ve given any of these items out at Halloween. (In other words, if you gave someone a candle of an owl on Halloween, you get 4 points. 1 for the candle, one because it was an owl, and double that for giving it on Halloween.)** Since my music collection is apparently not up to snuff, I think that gives me a total of 999 points. Then again, there’s something striking about that number…😃 ---
**Author:** ![Alias](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/a88e4f/32.png) [@Alias](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Alias)\ **Post date:** [January 10, 2004, 1:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-too-can-be-possessed-by-demons/222690/49 "2004-01-10T01:10:56Z")
I tried to add it all up until I got to the toys, dolls and stuffed animals. Come on, people! I have a 6-year-old daughter! I can’t possibly count all those! I’ll just have to accept the fact that I’m going to burn in hell while being tormented by all the demons that have come into my house over the years. Oh well. ---
**Author:** ![Angel\_Heart](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/5e9695/32.png) [@Angel\_Heart](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Angel_Heart)\ **Post date:** [January 10, 2004, 4:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-too-can-be-possessed-by-demons/222690/50 "2004-01-10T04:27:26Z")
Candles: 12 (at least)— 24 points Paisley: 1 (Dad has a paisley tie) – 3 points Lucky Symbols: 1 (Shamrock (an actual potted one, so that should count more) and a small jade turtle) —7 points Harry Potter stuff: 4 (Every book except Order of the Phoenix, but none of the games or videos and stuff) Dolls and stuffed animals: Too many to count! (Upwards of 40 (120 points)) Had more but they were stored in the basement and ruined by a flood. Barbies: 1 (others given away to younger friends/cousins) —10 points Troll Dolls: 2 —34 points Rock and Roll: 350+? — 350 points Books on other religions: 5 (took a course on world religion) — 5 pts. Witchcraft items: Would a 6-quart kettle do? 🙂 Demons: 0 Witchdoctor: If this includes anyithing other than faith healing --20 points Dreamcatchers: 1 —10 points Does body splash count as perfume?, if so 20, otherwise 5 Procter and Gamble: Uh, lets say 4 High Estimate: 611 Low Estimate: 576 ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [January 10, 2004, 5:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-too-can-be-possessed-by-demons/222690/51 "2004-01-10T05:59:56Z")
Man, they’re going to have to build a whole new level in Hell, just for us Dopers! :eek: ---
**Author:** ![Xploder](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/x/a183cd/32.png) [@Xploder](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Xploder)\ **Post date:** [January 12, 2004, 2:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-too-can-be-possessed-by-demons/222690/52 "2004-01-12T02:01:20Z")
I started to count but gave up after reaching close to 10000 based on my music. Cool. And here I thought I was gonna go to hell because of the 60 gigs of porn on my puter. ---
**Author:** ![jellytoes](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/eb9ed0/32.png) [@jellytoes](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jellytoes)\ **Post date:** [January 12, 2004, 2:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-too-can-be-possessed-by-demons/222690/53 "2004-01-12T02:29:41Z")
I was doing okay until I got to the part about Lawry’s seasoned salt. … And then I wet myself laughing. ---
**Author:** ![IWLN](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/b5ac83/32.png) [@IWLN](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/IWLN)\ **Post date:** [January 12, 2004, 4:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-too-can-be-possessed-by-demons/222690/54 "2004-01-12T04:15:44Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Xploder \* > And here I thought I was gonna go to hell because of the 60 gigs of porn on my puter. There’s porn on computers?!:eek: ---
**Author:** ![Mephisto](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/48db29/32.png) [@Mephisto](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mephisto)\ **Post date:** [January 12, 2004, 4:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-too-can-be-possessed-by-demons/222690/55 "2004-01-12T04:34:54Z")
I’m off the chart, man, off the freakin’ chart . . . [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-too-can-be-possessed-by-demons/222690.md?page=2)