# You ungrateful SOB! ( **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [January 9, 2004, 6:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-ungrateful-sob/223606 "2004-01-09T06:57:44Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 12\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Homebrew](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/c89c15/32.png) [@Homebrew](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Homebrew)\ **Post date:** [January 9, 2004, 9:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-ungrateful-sob/223606/21 "2004-01-09T21:35:13Z")
What the hell difference does it matter if the OP and her then-SO were married or not? It doesn’t change the rant one whit so there is no reason to ask. Hey this isn’t a flame, but you’re an ignorant shit. Flame or not? ---
**Author:** ![Uncommon\_Sense](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/f9ae1b/32.png) [@Uncommon\_Sense](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Uncommon_Sense)\ **Post date:** [January 9, 2004, 11:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-ungrateful-sob/223606/22 "2004-01-09T23:12:44Z")
I see your point, but I think you were a little hard on him. I really don`t think **duffer** meant to step on your land mine. ---
**Author:** ![VunderBob](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/839c29/32.png) [@VunderBob](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/VunderBob)\ **Post date:** [January 9, 2004, 11:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-ungrateful-sob/223606/23 "2004-01-09T23:51:23Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Homebrew \* > \*\*What the hell difference does it matter if the OP and her then-SO were married or not? It doesn’t change the rant one whit so there is no reason to ask. > \*\* It’s relevant in that by not being married, it’s marginally easier to kck his cheating ass out. Settling who has custody of the house can get sticky, but at least it’s not a divorce… ---
**Author:** ![EddyTeddyFreddy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/eddyteddyfreddy/32/18796_2.png) [@EddyTeddyFreddy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/EddyTeddyFreddy)\ **Post date:** [January 10, 2004, 11:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-ungrateful-sob/223606/24 "2004-01-10T23:08:41Z")
> [@](#): > > **by truthbot:** > His personality changed after his stroke. He has childish outbursts of temper and it can get rather ugly at times. Is this cause and effect at work here? Did the physical damage to the brain from the stroke cause the personality changes? I found [this information](http://www.ninds.nih.gov/health_and_medical/pubs/poststrokerehab.htm#disabilities) on a quick Googling of “personality changes stroke”: > [@](#): > > Many people who survive a stroke feel fear, anxiety, frustration, anger, sadness, and a sense of grief for their physical and mental losses. These feelings are a natural response to the psychological trauma of stroke. Some emotional disturbances and personality changes are caused by the physical effects of brain damage. Clinical depression, which is a sense of hopelessness that disrupts an individual’s ability to function, appears to be the emotional disorder most commonly experienced by stroke survivors. Signs of clinical depression include sleep disturbances, a radical change in eating patterns that may lead to sudden weight loss or gain, lethargy, social withdrawal, irritability, fatigue, self-loathing, and suicidal thoughts. Post-stroke depression can be treated with antidepressant medications and psychological counseling. There were lots of other links addressing the topic. I don’t know if this will help you or not. I wish you the best of luck, whichever way you choose to go. Also hoping you can somehow keep your country life, especially the horses (says the barn slave of a QH and a TB). ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [January 10, 2004, 11:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-ungrateful-sob/223606/25 "2004-01-10T23:13:25Z")
I’m so sorry, **truthbot**. ---
**Author:** ![Homebrew](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/c89c15/32.png) [@Homebrew](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Homebrew)\ **Post date:** [January 11, 2004, 4:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-ungrateful-sob/223606/26 "2004-01-11T04:55:33Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by vunderbob \* > \*\*It’s relevant in that by not being married, it’s marginally easier to kck his cheating ass out. Settling who has custody of the house can get sticky, but at least it’s not a divorce… \*\* The question was **why** were they not married. That is irrelevant. Married or not makes no difference in the story to this point. ---
**Author:** ![Krisfer\_the\_Cat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/5f9b8f/32.png) [@Krisfer\_the\_Cat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Krisfer_the_Cat)\ **Post date:** [January 11, 2004, 4:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-ungrateful-sob/223606/27 "2004-01-11T16:47:19Z")
I send you my deepest condolences as well. And add to **Zabali’s** post to go forward in life. Find a new guy if for no other reason than to say “SO THERE!” to the POS. 😃 But seriously, **Zabali** has great advice, anything else I said would be redundant. Good Luck! ---
**Author:** ![Tremmie](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/5fc32e/32.png) [@Tremmie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tremmie)\ **Post date:** [January 11, 2004, 7:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-ungrateful-sob/223606/28 "2004-01-11T19:09:21Z")
Im sorry but i don’t think i understand yet. Did he dump you because he wanted someone younger or did you dump him because he was a lazy ass? ---
**Author:** ![Ilsa\_Lund](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/a6a055/32.png) [@Ilsa\_Lund](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ilsa_Lund)\ **Post date:** [January 11, 2004, 7:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-ungrateful-sob/223606/29 "2004-01-11T19:16:32Z")
Sorry to hear that. It must really suck. Don’t forget there are other fish in the sea, though, as well as other bad cliches. You’ll find someone. ---
**Author:** ![sperfur](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a9adbd/32.png) [@sperfur](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/sperfur)\ **Post date:** [January 12, 2004, 12:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-ungrateful-sob/223606/30 "2004-01-12T00:24:00Z")
I know it hurts right now, but it sure sounds to me like you’ll be better off without this person in your life. So I say ‘Congratulations!’ I know you weren’t soliciting advice, but since you bought the house _together_, I suggest you contact an attorney ASAP about dividing your property. Especially if you put in a sizable down payment, have much equity or much shared property to divide. Good luck. Please keep us updated. ---
**Author:** ![truthbot](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/e9bcb4/32.png) [@truthbot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/truthbot)\ **Post date:** [January 12, 2004, 3:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-ungrateful-sob/223606/31 "2004-01-12T03:51:36Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Guinastasia \* > \*\*I’m so sorry, **truthbot**. \*\* **Guin** , that means so much to me. Thank you from the bottom of my heart. I would like to thank everyone that supported me in this thread to date. Even the ones that questioned my marial status. Life goes on, and such. I would like to thank Zabali\_Clawbane, Krisfer the Cat, EddyTeddyFreddy, Tremmie, Homebrew, sperfur, Ilsa\_Lund, vunderbob, whuckfistle, This Year’s Model, mhendo, A Monkey With a Gun, carrot, Ice Wolf, SPOOFE and Creative\_Munster. **EddyTeddyFreddy** , thank you for the link, I have read everything related to strokes/depression/recovery in the past year. Hence, I feel that mr. bot would benefit from some therapy. But he refuses to attend. It’s like telling a two-year old that they would benefit from attending a play-group. Yes, I know you will miss mommy, but you will make new friends! ---
**Author:** ![truthbot](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/e9bcb4/32.png) [@truthbot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/truthbot)\ **Post date:** [January 12, 2004, 4:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-ungrateful-sob/223606/32 "2004-01-12T04:01:56Z")
…and for those that wonder about the status of my home. It’s a no-brainer. I sold my house last year, and because of capital gains laws, I had to plunk down a sizable down-payment on the house I bought with mr. bot. I own out-right 80% of the house. If/when we split up, he has to buy me out, or I can give him walking-away money. So custody of the house is not an issue with us. It’s my place. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-ungrateful-sob/223606.md?page=1)