# You wanna buy a duck? **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [November 26, 2014, 11:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-wanna-buy-a-duck/705718 "2014-11-26T23:16:33Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Dallas\_Jones](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dallas_jones/32/3277_2.png) [@Dallas\_Jones](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dallas_Jones)\ **Post date:** [November 27, 2014, 7:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-wanna-buy-a-duck/705718/21 "2014-11-27T19:09:46Z")
> [@Biotop](#): > > Ducks cost a lot of money. If you need to buy one, best go to the bank for a loon. Ducks are reasonably free if you have a shotgun and the proper license. šŸ˜‰ ---
**Author:** ![Biotop](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/biotop/32/321_2.png) [@Biotop](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Biotop)\ **Post date:** [November 27, 2014, 7:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-wanna-buy-a-duck/705718/22 "2014-11-27T19:34:37Z")
Be careful what you pay for a duck. There are a lot of cheaters out there and you donā€™t want to get swandled. ---
**Author:** ![johnpost](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/f17d59/32.png) [@johnpost](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/johnpost)\ **Post date:** [November 28, 2014, 1:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-wanna-buy-a-duck/705718/23 "2014-11-28T01:26:19Z")
> [@Biotop](#): > > You donā€™t know the origin of the duck phrase, and I do not know eider. Sorry. > [@Biotop](#): > > Ducks cost a lot of money. If you need to buy one, best go to the bank for a loon. > [@Biotop](#): > > Be careful what you pay for a duck. There are a lot of cheaters out there and you donā€™t want to get swandled. you quack me up. ---
**Author:** ![Kent\_Clark](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kent_clark/32/105_2.png) [@Kent\_Clark](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kent_Clark)\ **Post date:** [November 28, 2014, 1:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-wanna-buy-a-duck/705718/24 "2014-11-28T01:47:48Z")
> [@Dallas\_Jones](#): > > Ducks are reasonably free if you have a shotgun and the proper license. šŸ˜‰ [Rabbit season!](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9-k5J4RxQdE) ---
**Author:** ![eschereal](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/eschereal/32/18939_2.png) [@eschereal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/eschereal)\ **Post date:** [November 28, 2014, 6:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-wanna-buy-a-duck/705718/25 "2014-11-28T06:29:01Z")
> [@Biotop](#): > > Ducks cost a lot of money. If you need to buy one, best go to the bank for a loon. If you are in Canada, I think you need at least a pocketful of loons to buy a duck. ---
**Author:** ![zoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/zoid/32/336_2.png) [@zoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/zoid)\ **Post date:** [November 28, 2014, 7:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-wanna-buy-a-duck/705718/26 "2014-11-28T07:01:09Z")
> [@Biotop](#): > > You donā€™t know the origin of the duck phrase, and I do not know eider. Sorry. > [@Biotop](#): > > Ducks cost a lot of money. If you need to buy one, best go to the bank for a loon. > [@Biotop](#): > > Be careful what you pay for a duck. There are a lot of cheaters out there and you donā€™t want to get swandled. Thatā€™s three strikes Yer _ **OUT!** _ ---
**Author:** ![eschereal](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/eschereal/32/18939_2.png) [@eschereal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/eschereal)\ **Post date:** [November 28, 2014, 7:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-wanna-buy-a-duck/705718/27 "2014-11-28T07:06:50Z")
> [@zoid](#): > > Thatā€™s three strikes > > Yer _ **OUT!** _ this thread is about ducks, not bats ---
**Author:** ![cochrane](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cochrane/32/10441_2.png) [@cochrane](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cochrane)\ **Post date:** [November 28, 2014, 8:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-wanna-buy-a-duck/705718/28 "2014-11-28T08:08:02Z")
I am a duck bent on self-preservationumanum. ---
**Author:** ![Zebra](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/c0e974/32.png) [@Zebra](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zebra)\ **Post date:** [November 29, 2014, 1:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-wanna-buy-a-duck/705718/29 "2014-11-29T01:19:09Z")
How do you sell a duck to deaf person? [SIZE=ā€œ7ā€]DO YOU WANT TO BUY A DUCK?[/SIZE] ---
**Author:** ![slowlearner](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a88e57/32.png) [@slowlearner](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/slowlearner)\ **Post date:** [November 29, 2014, 1:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-wanna-buy-a-duck/705718/30 "2014-11-29T01:35:04Z")
and once thatā€™s figured out thereā€™s still the whole problem of duck butter ---
**Author:** ![samclem](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a9a28c/32.png) [@samclem](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/samclem)\ **Post date:** [November 29, 2014, 2:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-wanna-buy-a-duck/705718/31 "2014-11-29T02:06:20Z")
> [@samclem](#): > > How do you get down off an elephant? > [@swampspruce](#): > > With a ladder, Silly. You donā€™t get down off an elephant. You get down off a duck. Silly. ---
**Author:** ![eschereal](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/eschereal/32/18939_2.png) [@eschereal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/eschereal)\ **Post date:** [November 29, 2014, 2:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-wanna-buy-a-duck/705718/32 "2014-11-29T02:16:40Z")
But if the elephant had just been stumbling through a parka factory, you might be facing just such a situation, in which case I would recommend a vacuum cleaner. ---
**Author:** ![Backwater\_Under\_Duck](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ba8739/32.png) [@Backwater\_Under\_Duck](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Backwater_Under_Duck)\ **Post date:** [December 2, 2014, 1:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-wanna-buy-a-duck/705718/33 "2014-12-02T01:12:27Z")
And the kid said: I got a fuck for a duck, a duck for a fuck, a fucked-up duck and twenty dollars. ---
**Author:** ![Ranger\_Jeff](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ranger_jeff/32/2065_2.png) [@Ranger\_Jeff](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ranger_Jeff)\ **Post date:** [December 2, 2014, 1:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-wanna-buy-a-duck/705718/34 "2014-12-02T01:56:59Z")
Whya no chicken? ---
**Author:** ![stui\_magpie](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/stui_magpie/32/11010_2.png) [@stui\_magpie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/stui_magpie)\ **Post date:** [December 2, 2014, 2:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-wanna-buy-a-duck/705718/35 "2014-12-02T02:54:20Z")
What the Duck? ---
**Author:** ![eschereal](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/eschereal/32/18939_2.png) [@eschereal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/eschereal)\ **Post date:** [December 2, 2014, 3:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-wanna-buy-a-duck/705718/36 "2014-12-02T03:05:00Z")
it seems to be an ongoing harlequin romance ---
**Author:** ![Inigo\_Montoya](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/inigo_montoya/32/124_2.png) [@Inigo\_Montoya](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Inigo_Montoya)\ **Post date:** [December 2, 2014, 4:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-wanna-buy-a-duck/705718/37 "2014-12-02T16:45:24Z")
> [@Backwater\_Under\_Duck](#): > > And the kid said: I got a fuck for a duck, a duck for a fuck, a fucked-up duck and twenty dollars. a fuck for a duck, a duck for a fuck, and a twenty dollar bill for a fucked up duck The version I heard required replacement of the ducks bill, at a cost of $20, after a car ran over the poor beastā€™s beak. The plotā€™s got holes, but itā€™s good enough for 5th grade. ---
**Author:** ![swampspruce](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/swampspruce/32/261_2.png) [@swampspruce](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/swampspruce)\ **Post date:** [December 2, 2014, 5:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-wanna-buy-a-duck/705718/38 "2014-12-02T17:04:52Z")
> [@samclem](#): > > You donā€™t get down off an elephant. You get down off a duck. > > Silly. _Scots brogue_ "Weā€™ve got elephant doon, thaā€™ll make a huge bloody coat! _end_ ---
**Author:** ![Freddy\_the\_Pig](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/a587f6/32.png) [@Freddy\_the\_Pig](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Freddy_the_Pig)\ **Post date:** [December 2, 2014, 8:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-wanna-buy-a-duck/705718/39 "2014-12-02T20:53:36Z")
Guy in trench coat, to Ziggy: ā€œYou wanna buy a duck?ā€ Ziggy, walking away with the duck: ā€œIā€™ve always been a sucker for a smooth sales pitch.ā€ ---
**Author:** ![N9IWP](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/n9iwp/32/3154_2.png) [@N9IWP](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/N9IWP)\ **Post date:** [December 2, 2014, 11:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-wanna-buy-a-duck/705718/40 "2014-12-02T23:01:13Z")
Hoping this was a link for a DUKW for sale: > **[DUKW](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/DUKW)** > > The DUKW (colloquially known as Duck) is a six-wheel-drive amphibious modification of the .mw-parser-output .frac{white-space:nowrap}.mw-parser-output .frac .num,.mw-parser-output .frac .den{font-size:80%;line-height:0;vertical-align:super}.mw-parser-output .frac .den{vertical-align:sub}.mw-parser-output .sr-only{border:0;clip:rect(0,0,0,0);clip-path:polygon(0px 0px,0px 0px,0px 0px);height:1px;margin:-1px;overflow:hidden;padding:0;position:absolute;width:1px}2+1ā„2-ton CCKW trucks used by the U.... Brian [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-wanna-buy-a-duck/705718.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-wanna-buy-a-duck/705718.md?page=3)