# You were in a dream of mine last night.... **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [January 5, 2009, 3:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-were-in-a-dream-of-mine-last-night/479949 "2009-01-05T15:32:09Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![TroubleAgain](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/e480ec/32.png) [@TroubleAgain](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TroubleAgain)\ **Post date:** [January 5, 2009, 5:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-were-in-a-dream-of-mine-last-night/479949/21 "2009-01-05T17:57:44Z")
I’ve shared dreams about friends and co-workers, and had them do the same (but not if they’re embarrassing ones–no “Hey, I dreamed we had sex last night!”) ::shrug:: It’s no big deal. It’s usually prompted by running into that friend, which triggers the memory, and the thought just pops out. ---
**Author:** ![THespos](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/8c91f0/32.png) [@THespos](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/THespos)\ **Post date:** [January 5, 2009, 6:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-were-in-a-dream-of-mine-last-night/479949/22 "2009-01-05T18:05:42Z")
> [@SHAKES](#): > > Og! You too? I knew I wasn’t the only one. 😉 I was exaggerating a bit with my original example, but not much. I’ve known people (former GFs, my wife, etc.) who have, at least emotionally, have concerned themselves with my behavior in their dreams when they ought not to have dedicated a moment’s thought to it. Almost as if there was some significance or need to analyze it further, like my behavior is somehow the tell-all about our relationship. Well, there’s that and then the “acting pissy all morning because I zigged in the dream when I should have zagged” part. ---
**Author:** ![Jackmannii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jackmannii/32/311_2.png) [@Jackmannii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jackmannii)\ **Post date:** [January 5, 2009, 6:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-were-in-a-dream-of-mine-last-night/479949/23 "2009-01-05T18:06:32Z")
> [@THespos](#): > > While we’re pitting this, can we please pit the notion of being blamed for behavior displayed in someone else’s dream? My wife frequently blames me for not doing what she wants me to do in her dreams. Mrs. J. doesn’t _blame_ me for behaving badly in her dreams, but I feel vaguely guilty about it anyway. ☹ ---
**Author:** ![clairobscur](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/839c29/32.png) [@clairobscur](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/clairobscur)\ **Post date:** [January 5, 2009, 6:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-were-in-a-dream-of-mine-last-night/479949/24 "2009-01-05T18:39:29Z")
> [@neutron\_star](#): > > Honestly, the mundane, inoffensive shit that bothers people around here is just absurd sometimes. Well, on the other hand, it’s interesting. I never considered that some people might be that annoyed when you tell them about a dream they “featured” in. Of course, if you were to avoid doing everything someone ever ranted about in the Pit, you almost couldn’t have any interaction whatsoever with anybody. But it’s interesting nonetheless. ---
**Author:** ![Jackmannii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jackmannii/32/311_2.png) [@Jackmannii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jackmannii)\ **Post date:** [January 5, 2009, 6:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-were-in-a-dream-of-mine-last-night/479949/25 "2009-01-05T18:43:08Z")
As for this business of telling co-workers they appeared in your dream, well, discretion is everything. The other night I had a dream in which one of my colleagues was at bat for a major league baseball team. It seemed harmless enough and even a good idea to tell him (for one thing, he was crowding the plate and risking a fastball in his ear) but saw no point to it. I doubt he’s even Triple-A material. On the other hand, if you dreamt your boss was naked on all fours, barking and begging for Liv-A-Snaps, telling her will probably not ensure top scores on your next evaluation. ---
**Author:** ![Biffy\_the\_Elephant\_Shrew](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/e47c2d/32.png) [@Biffy\_the\_Elephant\_Shrew](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Biffy_the_Elephant_Shrew)\ **Post date:** [January 5, 2009, 6:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-were-in-a-dream-of-mine-last-night/479949/26 "2009-01-05T18:46:04Z")
> [@VinylTurnip](#): > > \*At dawn my lover comes to me > And tells me of her dreams. > > With no attempts to shovel the glimpse > Into the ditch of what each one means.\* I’ll let you be in my dream if I can be in yours. ---
**Author:** ![WhyNot](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/c77e96/32.png) [@WhyNot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WhyNot)\ **Post date:** [January 5, 2009, 6:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-were-in-a-dream-of-mine-last-night/479949/27 "2009-01-05T18:49:55Z")
> [@clairobscur](#): > > Of course, if you were to avoid doing everything someone ever ranted about in the Pit, you almost couldn’t have any interaction whatsoever with anybody. Oh, sure - think you’re some sort of special snowflake recluse, do you? Why the fuck should I have to put up with your antisocial ways, going around all ignoring me willy-nilly and stuff? How dare you not interact with the rest of us?! 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Spice\_Weasel](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spice_weasel/32/5435_2.png) [@Spice\_Weasel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spice_Weasel)\ **Post date:** [January 5, 2009, 6:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-were-in-a-dream-of-mine-last-night/479949/28 "2009-01-05T18:54:34Z")
Well, I think dreams are interesting and would enjoy knowing if someone dreamed about me. But that’s just me. ---
**Author:** ![twickster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ec9cab/32.png) [@twickster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/twickster)\ **Post date:** [January 5, 2009, 8:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-were-in-a-dream-of-mine-last-night/479949/29 "2009-01-05T20:13:02Z")
It’s small talk, the humanoid equivalent of primate grooming behavior. Your life will be more pleasant if you learn to accept such overtures with a smile rather than a snarl. ---
**Author:** ![Santo\_Rugger](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e95f7d/32.png) [@Santo\_Rugger](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Santo_Rugger)\ **Post date:** [January 5, 2009, 8:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-were-in-a-dream-of-mine-last-night/479949/30 "2009-01-05T20:27:12Z")
I had a dream once that I was entering somebody with long, curly blond hair from behind. It felt pretty damn good, and then they turned around. It was one of the guys on my rugby team with long, curly blond hair. Damn right I told him about it, it was funny as hell. And, being the classy guy that I am, I waited to tell him until practice so I could tell the entire team while I led the stretching circle. Good stuff! ---
**Author:** ![Man\_With\_a\_Cat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/cab0a1/32.png) [@Man\_With\_a\_Cat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Man_With_a_Cat)\ **Post date:** [January 5, 2009, 8:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-were-in-a-dream-of-mine-last-night/479949/31 "2009-01-05T20:37:57Z")
I have a really good friend - female, and pretty damn attractive too. We’re both pretty free about telling each other when one of us has been in the other’s dreams. Usually it’s something very work-ish or mundane. A few months ago she told me about one she’d had that was distinctly NOT mundane wherein we sitting next to each other, around a big conference table at a meeting with a lot of our colleagues and IM’ing each other suggestive messages on our laptops when one of the Major Cheeses decided that we weren’t paying attention and made us read and act out what we’d been texting. I just kind of chuckled and mentioned that at least that explained why I woke up muttering “show me your inbox you bad girl”. That’s kind of a secret joke between us now, anytime anyone near by says the word we both lose it. ---
**Author:** ![Jettboy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/85e7bf/32.png) [@Jettboy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jettboy)\ **Post date:** [January 5, 2009, 9:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-were-in-a-dream-of-mine-last-night/479949/32 "2009-01-05T21:30:34Z")
> [@Santo\_Rugger](#): > > I had a dream once that I was entering somebody with long, curly blond hair from behind. It felt pretty damn good, and then they turned around. It was one of the guys on my rugby team with long, curly blond hair. Damn right I told him about it, it was funny as hell. And, being the classy guy that I am, I waited to tell him until practice so I could tell the entire team while I led the stretching circle. Good stuff! Was he offended, or did he give you a secret wink? ---
**Author:** ![Swallowed\_My\_Cellphone](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/9d8465/32.png) [@Swallowed\_My\_Cellphone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Swallowed_My_Cellphone)\ **Post date:** [January 5, 2009, 9:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-were-in-a-dream-of-mine-last-night/479949/33 "2009-01-05T21:49:43Z")
> [@Unsquare\_Dance](#): > > Most of the time, friends tell me I was in a dream because I did something stupid/bizarre/funny, and they thought I might get a chuckle out of it. Then again, I don’t have any friends who think dreams actually mean something. That’s usually how I end up finding about cameo’s I’ve had in other dreams. Like a stressed out co-worker dreamt I was setting my computer on fire. I did get a chuckle out of that. No one thought there was any deep seeded meaning or anything, I didn’t find it weird or offensive, and actually I don’t see what the OP is fussing about. ---
**Author:** ![Liberal](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/848f3c/32.png) [@Liberal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Liberal)\ **Post date:** [January 6, 2009, 12:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-were-in-a-dream-of-mine-last-night/479949/34 "2009-01-06T00:20:05Z")
I thought it might be important to point out that “You were in a dream of mine last night” is not a phrase. A phrase is characterized by having no predicate. Obviously, I’m a social dweeb. ---
**Author:** ![Hazle\_Weatherfield](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/e9bcb4/32.png) [@Hazle\_Weatherfield](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hazle_Weatherfield)\ **Post date:** [January 6, 2009, 12:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-were-in-a-dream-of-mine-last-night/479949/35 "2009-01-06T00:28:38Z")
I only share dreams with close friends or family. Dreams reveal things that you might not be aware of and if you share them with someone who understands them or reads the wrong things into them, it could reveal something about you (whether true or not) that you don’t want anyone to know. ---
**Author:** ![magellan01](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@magellan01](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/magellan01)\ **Post date:** [January 6, 2009, 12:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-were-in-a-dream-of-mine-last-night/479949/36 "2009-01-06T00:37:06Z")
> [@clayton\_e](#): > > I thought about putting this in IMHO but I know I’ll just be pitting nicely there so I’m dropping it off here. > > This phrase drives me up a wall. But a bit better than “By the way, clayton\_e, your wife was in my dream last night.” No? ---
**Author:** ![Ro\_Carter](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/7feea3/32.png) [@Ro\_Carter](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ro_Carter)\ **Post date:** [January 6, 2009, 1:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-were-in-a-dream-of-mine-last-night/479949/37 "2009-01-06T01:54:55Z")
The last time this happened is also one of my favorite stories about the social ineptness of a good friend of mine. In addition to being very good friends, we had dated twice. He was bringing his new (and very much disliked) girlfriend to a party with a bunch of old friends (the girl he had been dating prior to the new girl, whom he dumped because he had been cheating on her with the new girlfriend. Said exgirlfriend was at the party, and nearly all in attendance were on her side of the entire thing). The new girlfriend had already met a large portion of those in attendance at a previous shindig, and was pretty much aware that they were not thrilled about her. I wasn’t taking anyone’s side (for reasons that don’t need to be elaborated on, as this is already getting off track). In any case, the new girlfriend was walking into a potentially hostile, but definately chilly environment, which (I’m not sure if she was aware of this or not) contained 90% of her boyfriend’s ex girlfriends, and included the girl that he had broken up with to be with her. They walk in, I get up and head over to say hi. From across the room, he looks at me and says “I had a dream about you last night!”. My jaw drops a little, the poor new girlfriend looks uncomfortable, but he continues on: “You were definitely more excited about it than I was!”. I close my eyes to say a small prayer to the gods, questioning how he has managed to survive for quite so long without horribly offending someone, turn and apologize to the girlfriend, and steer topics to a new area. Telling other people about dreams is best confined to situations where said dreams are odd enough to inspire laughter, such as dreaming about dancing tamales and cows surfing on rivers of chocolate. ---
**Author:** ![Heffalump\_and\_Roo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/heffalump_and_roo/32/7691_2.png) [@Heffalump\_and\_Roo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Heffalump_and_Roo)\ **Post date:** [January 6, 2009, 2:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-were-in-a-dream-of-mine-last-night/479949/38 "2009-01-06T02:00:54Z")
> [@magellan01](#): > > But a bit better than “By the way, clayton\_e, your wife was in my dream last night.” No? And that’s even a bit better than “By the way, clayton\_e, I was banging your wife in my dream last night.” ---
**Author:** ![alice\_in\_wonderland](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/alice_in_wonderland/32/176_2.png) [@alice\_in\_wonderland](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/alice_in_wonderland)\ **Post date:** [January 6, 2009, 2:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-were-in-a-dream-of-mine-last-night/479949/39 "2009-01-06T02:20:28Z")
You know, I have a co-worker and I had a dream that he was in. Everything was pretty well exactly the same as when I’m awake (we were in a budget meeting in his office); HOWEVER, in the dream he had a beard. It looked really, really bad. I was compelled to come in the next day and tell him if he was considering a beard, he should probably rethink it. Other than that, I tend to keep that sort of thing to myself. ---
**Author:** ![Der\_Trihs](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/der_trihs/32/233_2.png) [@Der\_Trihs](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Der_Trihs)\ **Post date:** [January 6, 2009, 2:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-were-in-a-dream-of-mine-last-night/479949/40 "2009-01-06T02:55:04Z")
> [@clayton\_e](#): > > > [@THespos](#): > > > > While we’re pitting this, can we please pit the notion of being blamed for behavior displayed in someone else’s dream? My wife frequently blames me for not doing what she wants me to do in her dreams. I was supposed to ride in on the pink Pegasus and kill her boss with the Sword of Omens, but instead I went fetal with fear under a giant green toadstool. My fault. Totally. > > Please tell me she’s saying that in jest. > > If she’s serious… Dude.. I recall a thread a few months ago where various posters either ( if male ) complained about it, or ( if female ) admitted doing it. Several of the ladies admitted feeling unfair about it all shortly thereafter. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-were-in-a-dream-of-mine-last-night/479949.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-were-in-a-dream-of-mine-last-night/479949.md?page=3)