# You won't be raped tonight...you're fucking welcome, bitch. **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [June 1, 2013, 6:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-wont-be-raped-tonight-youre-fucking-welcome-bitch/659845 "2013-06-01T06:05:46Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 18
**Author:** ![Lucas\_Jackson](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lucas_jackson/32/303_2.png) [@Lucas\_Jackson](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lucas_Jackson)\ **Post date:** [June 6, 2013, 4:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-wont-be-raped-tonight-youre-fucking-welcome-bitch/659845/341 "2013-06-06T04:46:15Z")
> [@colander](#): > > Well, if it helps you decide, we are talking about a man who thought it would be a good idea to share [this action-style photo portrait of himself and his family](http://www.google.com/imgres?imgurl=http://www.nouilles.info/illustrations/sdmb_portraits/6642.jpg&imgrefurl=http://www.nouilles.info/sdpix/6642.html&h=690&w=536&sz=418&tbnid=Yibkc_cWSOg4qM:&tbnh=90&tbnw=70&zoom=1&usg=__UxuiwEShxYSTqNy9cHyIgua0T78=&docid=tWeoViAceRhFNM&sa=X&ei=sQ2wUebiI-T7iwL_j4GgAQ&ved=0CEQQ9QEwBQ&dur=2534) with the entire internet. Probably not something Ambrose Bierce would have done. Also, see [this,](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showpost.php?p=16161938&postcount=1) which as far as I can tell was not meant sarcastically. The photo (while a little over top itself) is forgivable but that post… just asking questions, right? ---
**Author:** ![Nzinga\_Seated](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/b5ac83/32.png) [@Nzinga\_Seated](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nzinga_Seated)\ **Post date:** [June 6, 2013, 5:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-wont-be-raped-tonight-youre-fucking-welcome-bitch/659845/342 "2013-06-06T05:03:03Z")
> [@colander](#): > > Well, if it helps you decide, we are talking about a man who thought it would be a good idea to share [this action-style photo portrait of himself and his family](http://www.google.com/imgres?imgurl=http://www.nouilles.info/illustrations/sdmb_portraits/6642.jpg&imgrefurl=http://www.nouilles.info/sdpix/6642.html&h=690&w=536&sz=418&tbnid=Yibkc_cWSOg4qM:&tbnh=90&tbnw=70&zoom=1&usg=__UxuiwEShxYSTqNy9cHyIgua0T78=&docid=tWeoViAceRhFNM&sa=X&ei=sQ2wUebiI-T7iwL_j4GgAQ&ved=0CEQQ9QEwBQ&dur=2534) with the entire internet. Probably not something Ambrose Bierce would have done. Also, see [this,](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showpost.php?p=16161938&postcount=1) which as far as I can tell was not meant sarcastically. That…that picture is awesome. ---
**Author:** ![Measure\_for\_Measure](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/measure_for_measure/32/557_2.png) [@Measure\_for\_Measure](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Measure_for_Measure)\ **Post date:** [June 6, 2013, 7:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-wont-be-raped-tonight-youre-fucking-welcome-bitch/659845/343 "2013-06-06T07:00:31Z")
> [@panaccione](#): > > Because I would agree that it sounds like you did the best you could. What I can’t agree with is that you would not change a single aspect. (20-20 hindsight stuff snipped) > [@panaccione](#): > > It’s pretty sad how nasty some of you are on here. I endorse these sentiments. I’m not complaining, but I generally don’t participate in these advice threads, since I always feel I lack sufficient information to tell whether the OP is being, say, a dick or not. Tone of voice matters as does facial expression. Given the info in the OP, I can imagine Chessic being a good guy, a well meaning person who is sometimes clumsy in execution or a bit of prick. I honestly don’t know and frankly I simply can’t know. Speaking personally though, whenever I find myself in adrenalin enhancing situations, I always revisit the event in my mind and ask how I could have improved my game. I fully expect that execution won’t be optimal. Improvisation is like that. For me. ---
**Author:** ![WisdomofLife](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/34f0e0/32.png) [@WisdomofLife](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WisdomofLife)\ **Post date:** [June 6, 2013, 10:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-wont-be-raped-tonight-youre-fucking-welcome-bitch/659845/344 "2013-06-06T10:39:17Z")
Chessic, wishing that your wife or anyone to be raped in the first place after they failed to acknowledged your rescuing of them from likely rapist doesn’t exactly make you husband, male part or person of year material. Even if you wife finally saw the light of error of her ways according to your view, it doesn’t exactly excuse you from finishing wishing harm or possibly death in the first place. What do you think would happen if you told the story in first place about? The majority of people will agree with you and shower praise upon praise for you? I don’t know anyone who was raped personally but I pretty sure it is brutal and sick from what I heard about it, and I’m pretty sure other posters know someone who has been raped and the negative consequences and don’t like it when you wish harm to others. What would happened if your wife and the friend wished rape on you for failing to acknowledge them in a rescue? I would be pretty bad about it and worried how much my spouse really cared for me. When if you forgive them in the end, it don’t end the problems in your relationship if you or your spouse continue to think, write and talk like that. You have the right to be bad at your spouse and friend if they disagree with you but doesn’t give you the right to wish or give actual bodily harm on them. ---
**Author:** ![lance\_strongarm](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/87869e/32.png) [@lance\_strongarm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lance_strongarm)\ **Post date:** [June 6, 2013, 11:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-wont-be-raped-tonight-youre-fucking-welcome-bitch/659845/345 "2013-06-06T11:01:00Z")
> [@saje](#): > > If we were in a bar, yeah. But we’re not, so there is no irony. Oh, yeah, that makes all the difference! Of course, if we accept that idea, then everything Chessic has said here, rather than in the bar - including the title of his thread - was fair game too, wasn’t it? ---
**Author:** ![saje](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/saje/32/3631_2.png) [@saje](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/saje)\ **Post date:** [June 6, 2013, 11:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-wont-be-raped-tonight-youre-fucking-welcome-bitch/659845/346 "2013-06-06T11:29:10Z")
> [@lance\_strongarm](#): > > Oh, yeah, that makes all the difference! > > Of course, if we accept that idea, then everything Chessic has said here, rather than in the bar - including the title of his thread - was fair game too, wasn’t it? Are you drunk too? ---
**Author:** ![Tracijo67](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/9fc348/32.png) [@Tracijo67](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tracijo67)\ **Post date:** [June 6, 2013, 11:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-wont-be-raped-tonight-youre-fucking-welcome-bitch/659845/347 "2013-06-06T11:33:59Z")
> [@WisdomofLife](#): > > Chessic, wishing that your wife or anyone to be raped in the first place after they failed to acknowledged your rescuing of them from likely rapist doesn’t exactly make you husband, male part or person of year material. Even if you wife finally saw the light of error of her ways according to your view, it doesn’t exactly excuse you from finishing wishing harm or possibly death in the first place. > > What do you think would happen if you told the story in first place about? The majority of people will agree with you and shower praise upon praise for you? I don’t know anyone who was raped personally but I pretty sure it is brutal and sick from what I heard about it, and I’m pretty sure other posters know someone who has been raped and the negative consequences and don’t like it when you wish harm to others. > > What would happened if your wife and the friend wished rape on you for failing to acknowledge them in a rescue? I would be pretty bad about it and worried how much my spouse really cared for me. When if you forgive them in the end, it don’t end the problems in your relationship if you or your spouse continue to think, write and talk like that. You have the right to be bad at your spouse and friend if they disagree with you but doesn’t give you the right to wish or give actual bodily harm on them. To be fair, I don’t think he implied that he wishes harm to come to his wife and barfly anywhere in the hyperbolic thread title or in any of his posts. The thread title rubbed me the wrong way too, but I interpreted it as he’s butthurt because he didn’t receive praise for his masculine posturing (and he inflated his role in the ‘rescue’ to an absurd degree). Chessic, FWIW had you said that you rescued barfly from I welcomed attention, I doubt you’d be getting so much negative attention. Then again, as I become aware of your posting history, it seems that you thrive on it anyway. ---
**Author:** ![lance\_strongarm](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/87869e/32.png) [@lance\_strongarm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lance_strongarm)\ **Post date:** [June 6, 2013, 12:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-wont-be-raped-tonight-youre-fucking-welcome-bitch/659845/348 "2013-06-06T12:55:22Z")
> [@saje](#): > > Are you drunk too? Okay, so from what I’m learning on this thread, it’s perfectly okay to be an obnoxious dick. You shouldn’t do it in a bar, because it could lead to violence, but otherwise, being an obnoxious dick is just fine. There’s nothing intrinsically wrong with it. In fact, we should find a new phrase to replace the judgmental “obnoxious” and “dick.” ---
**Author:** ![Sparky812](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/eb9ed0/32.png) [@Sparky812](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sparky812)\ **Post date:** [June 6, 2013, 2:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-wont-be-raped-tonight-youre-fucking-welcome-bitch/659845/349 "2013-06-06T14:15:49Z")
IMHO, I think \*\*Chessic \*\*was trying to do the right thing but went about it all wrong. Sure, when I was younger, before I was married with kids, I would’ve have handled it much quicker. ““The fuck you lookin’ a…” POWW! “Excuse me!” Of course nowadays, if I were in a similar situation, I would ask my wife (not my marine buddy), if she was observing the same thing I was, then ask if she thought we should intervene. I’d never tell her I had to “play the male part right now” WTF does that mean anyway? Most likely, my wife would go over and check on the other women and try to extricate them, if necessary. I would only approach them if they were to get physical or my wife asked for help. You do understand that you were escalating the situation by going over with your chest stuck out, staring the guy down and by getting your marine buddy involved as well, right? Look, even if everyone was to shower you in adulation for your bravery and chivalry, it still doesn’t make up for the fact that you shouldn’t have been it that situation in the first place. ---
**Author:** ![Troppus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/a587f6/32.png) [@Troppus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Troppus)\ **Post date:** [June 6, 2013, 2:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-wont-be-raped-tonight-youre-fucking-welcome-bitch/659845/350 "2013-06-06T14:45:14Z")
I don’t think that the OP or his round table of white knights can see it any other way and there’s no denying the hero fantasy has epic roots. And it’s nice that some men have protective feelings towards women; I’ve had a couple of occasions to ask for an escort out or asked a friend to pretend to be my date in order to avoid a confrontation or risk a bad reaction to rejection. And I was grateful for that help. But if I’m handling unwanted attention on my own, not asking for help, and a guy swells up and escalates an awkward situation and then demands accolades for risking his neck, I’m either going to roll my eyes or get angry at his unnecessary bravado. Missreading the situation and underestimating the ability of the womenfolk to take care of themselves is forgivable. I’d also give the OP a pass for taking affront at having one’s manhood challenged by a rival tribe because he was wearing his beer balls. But stitching up a snit because the maidens didn’t offer their finest mead and hymens in gratitude then crowing about it here is just priceless. ---
**Author:** ![MeanOldLady](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/meanoldlady/32/10737_2.png) [@MeanOldLady](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MeanOldLady)\ **Post date:** [June 6, 2013, 3:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-wont-be-raped-tonight-youre-fucking-welcome-bitch/659845/351 "2013-06-06T15:19:40Z")
> [@Tracijo67](#): > > The thread title rubbed me the wrong way too, but I interpreted it as he’s butthurt because he didn’t receive praise for his masculine posturing (and he inflated his role in the ‘rescue’ to an absurd degree). > > Chessic, FWIW had you said that you rescued barfly from I welcomed attention, I doubt you’d be getting so much negative attention. That’s the thing though. Had he said “My friend and I shooed away some creepy guy from pestering this girl we know” it certainly would have been more accurate, but generally, complaining about not being thanked properly kind of makes you seem like a douchebag. Of course, the exaggerated heroics in addition to crying about not being lauded for his bravery (“Next time, I guarantee you, I’ll refrain from putting myself in overt physical danger to protect you, because obviously it’s unappreciated.” - LOL) take it from being mildly douchey to hilariously full of shit. ---
**Author:** ![VinylTurnip](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/b2d939/32.png) [@VinylTurnip](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/VinylTurnip)\ **Post date:** [June 6, 2013, 3:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-wont-be-raped-tonight-youre-fucking-welcome-bitch/659845/352 "2013-06-06T15:22:10Z")
> [@panaccione](#): > > It’s pretty sad how nasty some of you are on here. Oh, you want some too, do you? You’re a colossal fucking dumbass who ought to be the sole person praying **lance strongarm** doesn’t get himself banned, because then you’ll be a shoo-in for the board’s biggest dipshit. And I mean that in the nicest way possible, which is none. None nice. ---
**Author:** ![Lamia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/8e7dd6/32.png) [@Lamia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lamia)\ **Post date:** [June 6, 2013, 3:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-wont-be-raped-tonight-youre-fucking-welcome-bitch/659845/353 "2013-06-06T15:33:38Z")
I for one am shocked – _shocked!_ – to find that nastiness is going on in here. I mean, this is the _Pit_, where one should expect nothing but tea and sympathy. ---
**Author:** ![MeanOldLady](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/meanoldlady/32/10737_2.png) [@MeanOldLady](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MeanOldLady)\ **Post date:** [June 6, 2013, 3:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-wont-be-raped-tonight-youre-fucking-welcome-bitch/659845/354 "2013-06-06T15:34:20Z")
Fuck tea, man. ---
**Author:** ![lance\_strongarm](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/87869e/32.png) [@lance\_strongarm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lance_strongarm)\ **Post date:** [June 6, 2013, 3:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-wont-be-raped-tonight-youre-fucking-welcome-bitch/659845/355 "2013-06-06T15:41:57Z")
> [@Lamia](#): > > I for one am shocked – _shocked!_ – to find that nastiness is going on in here. > > I mean, this is the _Pit_, where one should expect nothing but tea and sympathy. Kind of like…a bar? ---
**Author:** ![Inner\_Stickler](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/inner_stickler/32/318_2.png) [@Inner\_Stickler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Inner_Stickler)\ **Post date:** [June 6, 2013, 3:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-wont-be-raped-tonight-youre-fucking-welcome-bitch/659845/356 "2013-06-06T15:52:30Z")
> [@lance\_strongarm](#): > > Okay, so from what I’m learning on this thread, it’s perfectly okay to be an obnoxious dick. You shouldn’t do it in a bar, because it could lead to violence, but otherwise, being an obnoxious dick is just fine. There’s nothing intrinsically wrong with it. In fact, we should find a new phrase to replace the judgmental “obnoxious” and “dick.” Naw man, it’s when you get pissed that people are mocking your obnoxious dickery. _hides mug so no one sees him drinking black tea with lemon in the pit_ ---
**Author:** ![saje](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/saje/32/3631_2.png) [@saje](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/saje)\ **Post date:** [June 6, 2013, 4:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-wont-be-raped-tonight-youre-fucking-welcome-bitch/659845/357 "2013-06-06T16:05:04Z")
> [@lance\_strongarm](#): > > Kind of like…a bar? I come here when I want to blow off steam about (and to) arrogant people saying stupid shit. I go to a bar to have a few drinks and relax and have a good time chatting with friends. So again, no, this message board is not the same as a bar. ---
**Author:** ![panaccione](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/94ad74/32.png) [@panaccione](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/panaccione)\ **Post date:** [June 6, 2013, 4:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-wont-be-raped-tonight-youre-fucking-welcome-bitch/659845/358 "2013-06-06T16:08:10Z")
> [@VinylTurnip](#): > > Oh, you want some too, do you? You’re a colossal fucking dumbass who ought to be the sole person praying **lance strongarm** doesn’t get himself banned, because then you’ll be a shoo-in for the board’s biggest dipshit. And I mean that in the nicest way possible, which is none. None nice. :dubious: Sounds like somebody needs their Binky. ---
**Author:** ![lance\_strongarm](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/87869e/32.png) [@lance\_strongarm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lance_strongarm)\ **Post date:** [June 6, 2013, 4:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-wont-be-raped-tonight-youre-fucking-welcome-bitch/659845/359 "2013-06-06T16:17:18Z")
> [@saje](#): > > I come here when I want to blow off steam about (and to) arrogant people saying stupid shit. > > I go to a bar to have a few drinks and relax and have a good time chatting with friends. So again, no, this message board is not the same as a bar. Says you. I go to bars to blow off steam about, and to, arrogant people saying stupid shit. What are you going to do about it? ---
**Author:** ![enomaj](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/59ef9b/32.png) [@enomaj](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/enomaj)\ **Post date:** [June 6, 2013, 4:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-wont-be-raped-tonight-youre-fucking-welcome-bitch/659845/360 "2013-06-06T16:23:30Z")
I just saw somebody drinking black tea with lemon in the pit! Had his pinky raised and e’r’thang! [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-wont-be-raped-tonight-youre-fucking-welcome-bitch/659845.md?page=17) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-wont-be-raped-tonight-youre-fucking-welcome-bitch/659845.md?page=19)