# Your beloved has been kidnapped. Do you pay the ransom or call the police? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [March 4, 2015, 12:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-beloved-has-been-kidnapped-do-you-pay-the-ransom-or-call-the-police/714154 "2015-03-04T00:19:27Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![kayaker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kayaker/32/441_2.png) [@kayaker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kayaker)\ **Post date:** [March 4, 2015, 11:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-beloved-has-been-kidnapped-do-you-pay-the-ransom-or-call-the-police/714154/61 "2015-03-04T23:03:26Z")
> [@Honey](#): > > If I’m the kidnapper, I’m killing the hostage either way. After I’ve given the spouse proof of life, I’m killing the hostage, and then just waiting for the ransom. If for some reason I haven’t yet killed the hostage when I receive the ransom, I’m certainly killing him/her then. Noooooooo! Honey! It will affect your sleep. Maybe. ---
**Author:** ![kopek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kopek/32/337_2.png) [@kopek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kopek)\ **Post date:** [March 5, 2015, 12:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-beloved-has-been-kidnapped-do-you-pay-the-ransom-or-call-the-police/714154/62 "2015-03-05T00:48:26Z")
> [@kayaker](#): > > They lost me with the ear. What am I gonna do with a one eared gf? Save 50% on jewelry? ---
**Author:** ![ZPG\_Zealot](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/e47c2d/32.png) [@ZPG\_Zealot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ZPG_Zealot)\ **Post date:** [March 5, 2015, 12:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-beloved-has-been-kidnapped-do-you-pay-the-ransom-or-call-the-police/714154/63 "2015-03-05T00:56:06Z")
Handle it in house using every shady connection I’ve got even if it means I spend every dime I have (including all the lottery winnings). I would make the kidnappers dying wish be that I had gone to the police. ---
**Author:** ![Velocity](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/velocity/32/18006_2.png) [@Velocity](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Velocity)\ **Post date:** [March 5, 2015, 12:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-beloved-has-been-kidnapped-do-you-pay-the-ransom-or-call-the-police/714154/64 "2015-03-05T00:59:39Z")
> [@ZPG\_Zealot](#): > > Handle it in house using every shady connection I’ve got even if it means I spend every dime I have (including all the lottery winnings). I would make the kidnappers dying wish be that I had gone to the police. TV franchise 🆒 ---
**Author:** ![Typo\_Negative](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/typo_negative/32/484_2.png) [@Typo\_Negative](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Typo_Negative)\ **Post date:** [March 5, 2015, 1:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-beloved-has-been-kidnapped-do-you-pay-the-ransom-or-call-the-police/714154/65 "2015-03-05T01:11:02Z")
> [@Honey](#): > > If I’m the kidnapper, I’m killing the hostage either way. After I’ve given the spouse proof of life, I’m killing the hostage, and then just waiting for the ransom. If for some reason I haven’t yet killed the hostage when I receive the ransom, I’m certainly killing him/her then. Why? From a cost\benefit standpoint, doesn’t it make more sense to leave the victim alive? In California, the penalty for kidnapping is light compared with murder. And murdering the victim makes it a death penalty case. Letting the victim go doesn’t hurt you, leaving a body behind doesn’t help you. Plus, if people think the kidnapped is going to be killed anyway, it serves as disincentive for the families to pay up. ---
**Author:** ![HeXen](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/c89c15/32.png) [@HeXen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/HeXen)\ **Post date:** [March 5, 2015, 1:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-beloved-has-been-kidnapped-do-you-pay-the-ransom-or-call-the-police/714154/66 "2015-03-05T01:17:08Z")
Neither…I’d enjoy my new found wealth as a rich single guy. ---
**Author:** ![Velocity](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/velocity/32/18006_2.png) [@Velocity](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Velocity)\ **Post date:** [March 5, 2015, 1:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-beloved-has-been-kidnapped-do-you-pay-the-ransom-or-call-the-police/714154/67 "2015-03-05T01:45:09Z")
> [@Typo\_Negative](#): > > Letting the victim go doesn’t hurt you, leaving a body behind doesn’t help you. Well, the kidnappers would probably worry about the released victim testifying and providing a lot of verbal evidence. ---
**Author:** ![Count\_Blucher](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/c5a1d2/32.png) [@Count\_Blucher](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Count_Blucher)\ **Post date:** [March 5, 2015, 2:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-beloved-has-been-kidnapped-do-you-pay-the-ransom-or-call-the-police/714154/68 "2015-03-05T02:04:54Z")
They cut off her ear. They Cut. Off. Her. Ear. :eek: :mad: I’d probably have to rethink my lifestyle & probably my future, but then again… it is Gun Show Season… …and I now have enough to afford Alan Dershowitz… _ **Game On.** _ ---
**Author:** ![slash2k](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/439d5e/32.png) [@slash2k](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/slash2k)\ **Post date:** [March 5, 2015, 5:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-beloved-has-been-kidnapped-do-you-pay-the-ransom-or-call-the-police/714154/69 "2015-03-05T05:15:02Z")
> [@Whiskey\_Dickens](#): > > The bolded portion in your quote. [Folks whose business is providing international security](http://www.wyllieassociates.co.uk/kidnap.php), including dealing with kidnap & ransom of expats, seem to think that paying a ransom immediately is a really bad idea. > [@](#): > > Do not meet the demand. Whilst an immediate payment might seem an easy, if expensive, solution, it is highly unlikely to work. > > There are many reasons for this, some less obvious than others, but the overriding ones are twofold. Firstly, it will be difficult for you to know that you are dealing with the genuine kidnappers, that the victim is alive, and that they can and will deliver him or her to you. Secondly, by agreeing an immediate payment, you will persuade the kidnappers that they have under-priced the return, and they will either increase their demand or subject you to a double hit - ie, take the money, but then demand more before releasing their captive. Of course, their recommendation is to bring in specialists (like them!) to handle the negotiations. In the US, those specialists would seem to be the FBI; in Latin America or the Middle East, the cops are probably NOT a good idea. ---
**Author:** ![Urbanredneck](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/ea5d25/32.png) [@Urbanredneck](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Urbanredneck)\ **Post date:** [March 5, 2015, 5:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-beloved-has-been-kidnapped-do-you-pay-the-ransom-or-call-the-police/714154/70 "2015-03-05T05:29:41Z")
Question - instead of actual cash could they go the route of a secret Swiss bank account or are those a myth? ---
**Author:** ![Gatopescado](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gatopescado/32/5711_2.png) [@Gatopescado](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gatopescado)\ **Post date:** [March 5, 2015, 5:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-beloved-has-been-kidnapped-do-you-pay-the-ransom-or-call-the-police/714154/71 "2015-03-05T05:33:41Z")
aw shucks ---
**Author:** ![Siam\_Sam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/d78d45/32.png) [@Siam\_Sam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Siam_Sam)\ **Post date:** [March 5, 2015, 3:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-beloved-has-been-kidnapped-do-you-pay-the-ransom-or-call-the-police/714154/72 "2015-03-05T15:59:07Z")
> [@Velocity](#): > > Not to derail the thread, but I’m pretty sure the loss of the outer ears does not make one go deaf. What? ---
**Author:** ![amarinth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/3be4f8/32.png) [@amarinth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/amarinth)\ **Post date:** [March 5, 2015, 5:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-beloved-has-been-kidnapped-do-you-pay-the-ransom-or-call-the-police/714154/73 "2015-03-05T17:21:31Z")
> [@Urbanredneck](#): > > Now if it happened in another country, that would be a tough one. From what I think I remember having read, in countries where kidnapping is a business, it’s a business. The kidnappers don’t abuse or torture the kidnappees and if you pay, you get your loved one back. There, I’d pay. In the US, I’d call the FBI. ---
**Author:** ![DrDeth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/b487fb/32.png) [@DrDeth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DrDeth)\ **Post date:** [March 5, 2015, 6:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-beloved-has-been-kidnapped-do-you-pay-the-ransom-or-call-the-police/714154/74 "2015-03-05T18:27:01Z")
> [@amarinth](#): > > From what I think I remember having read, in countries where kidnapping is a business, it’s a business. The kidnappers don’t abuse or torture the kidnappees and if you pay, you get your loved one back. There, I’d pay. > > In the US, I’d call the FBI. Yep. Horrible as it is, those dudes are professional kidnappers, and it’s simply good business to return the victims unharmed- which is why they dont do crap like cutting ears off… at least not right away. Since this sitrep is in the USA, and the kidnappers have already shown they are unprofessional, violent & sadistic - and the fact that the FBI is very very good at what they do- here I’d go to the FBI. ---
**Author:** ![Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ecccb3/32.png) [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skald_the_Rhymer)\ **Post date:** [March 5, 2015, 6:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-beloved-has-been-kidnapped-do-you-pay-the-ransom-or-call-the-police/714154/75 "2015-03-05T18:30:12Z")
> [@DrDeth](#): > > Yep. Horrible as it is, those dudes are professional kidnappers, and it’s simply good business to return the victims unharmed- which is why they dont do crap like cutting ears off… at least not right away. > > Since this sitrep is in the USA, and the kidnappers have already shown they are unprofessional, violent & sadistic - and the fact that the FBI is very very good at what they do- here I’d go to the FBI. Apart from the dollar reference, there’s nothing in the OP that necessitates the hypo taking place in the US. Each poster should imagine it being wherever they actually live. ---
**Author:** ![GusNSpot](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gusnspot/32/436_2.png) [@GusNSpot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GusNSpot)\ **Post date:** [March 5, 2015, 7:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-beloved-has-been-kidnapped-do-you-pay-the-ransom-or-call-the-police/714154/76 "2015-03-05T19:30:49Z")
My wife & I have & do discuss this and have a plan. The kids all know this plan and as it pertains to grand kids. My siblings all know it. As neither of our parents are still living, they have very little input. he he he The important thing is that the actual decision has been made so we don’t need to think about it anymore. Everybody is on the same page. IMO, these kinds of decisions should already be made and agreed on. ---
**Author:** ![Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ecccb3/32.png) [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skald_the_Rhymer)\ **Post date:** [March 5, 2015, 8:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-beloved-has-been-kidnapped-do-you-pay-the-ransom-or-call-the-police/714154/77 "2015-03-05T20:08:03Z")
> [@GusNSpot](#): > > My wife & I have & do discuss this and have a plan. > > The kids all know this plan and as it pertains to grand kids. > > My siblings all know it. > > As neither of our parents are still living, they have very little input. he he he > > The important thing is that the actual decision has been made so we don’t need to think about it anymore. Everybody is on the same page. > > IMO, these kinds of decisions should already be made and agreed on. What made you make this plan? When I got my first banking job, we were told on the second day of orientation what to do if one of our loved ones were kidnapped to pressure us into assisting a bank robber. Is your reason similar? ---
**Author:** ![handsomeharry](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/e9c0ed/32.png) [@handsomeharry](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/handsomeharry)\ **Post date:** [March 6, 2015, 2:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-beloved-has-been-kidnapped-do-you-pay-the-ransom-or-call-the-police/714154/78 "2015-03-06T02:04:52Z")
> [@Shodan](#): > > Go to the police immediately. I assume that my loved one is dead already, and the ransom is the connection between the kidnappers and me that can be exploited. > > If the cops want me to put up the $10M for the ransom, no problem. No doubt they will record the serial numbers or mark it with ultraviolet ink or something. > > But when I get my loved one back, alive or not, I have $186 million and a lot of time on my hands. I can easily spend $100 million tracking the kidnappers down, and still have plenty left to celebrate when they are convicted. > > Regards, > Shodan Convicted? I would easily spend $100 million tracking the kidnappers down, and seeing if one of their ears would be a suitable replacement for the damaged one. For beginners. Per the OP, tho: Cops, first. Maybe I can find them on the public dime. ---
**Author:** ![TBG](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/c89c15/32.png) [@TBG](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TBG)\ **Post date:** [March 6, 2015, 4:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-beloved-has-been-kidnapped-do-you-pay-the-ransom-or-call-the-police/714154/79 "2015-03-06T04:44:10Z")
> [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](#): > > Okay, it’s good news/bad news time. > > The good news is that you’ve won the lottery, and in a big way. The one-time payout after taxes are is something like $196,961,169.13. The money has been safely deposited in your account. > > But here comes the bad news. The lottery administration insisted on making a public display of your good fortune, and predictably that’s backfired in the worst way. Criminals have abducted the person you love most in the world and are demanding a cool $$10,000,000 ransom. You’ve 48 hours to pay up or they’ll ship your dear one back to you in five separate boxes. Just so you know they’re not kidding around, they’ve already FedExed an ear. As per usual, they warn you not to go to the authorities. > > Do you do as instructed by the bad guys, or call in the FBI? I tell the bad guys, hey, return [whoever] with no further harm, and I’ll wire double what they asked for to whatever account they want. Otherwise, I will spend the entire amount of winnings tracking them down wherever they are, and having everyone in their entire families brutally murdered, every last cousin, inlaw, step, everyone. Hey, I can be a badass when it’s hypothetical. ---
**Author:** ![Clothahump](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/51bf81/32.png) [@Clothahump](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Clothahump)\ **Post date:** [March 6, 2015, 5:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-beloved-has-been-kidnapped-do-you-pay-the-ransom-or-call-the-police/714154/80 "2015-03-06T17:30:55Z")
I call the cops. I then hire mercenaries to track down the kidnappers for me so that I can extract my revenge, one square inch of skin at a time. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-beloved-has-been-kidnapped-do-you-pay-the-ransom-or-call-the-police/714154.md?page=3) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-beloved-has-been-kidnapped-do-you-pay-the-ransom-or-call-the-police/714154.md?page=5)