# Your descendants' children's names **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [March 18, 2012, 11:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-descendants-childrens-names/616172 "2012-03-18T23:28:46Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 14\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![Teacake](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/e9bcb4/32.png) [@Teacake](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Teacake)\ **Post date:** [March 19, 2012, 10:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-descendants-childrens-names/616172/41 "2012-03-19T22:12:19Z")
I teach a few boys called Stephen. Just so you know. No Normans, though. ---
**Author:** ![elbows](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/b3f665/32.png) [@elbows](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elbows)\ **Post date:** [March 19, 2012, 10:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-descendants-childrens-names/616172/42 "2012-03-19T22:27:59Z")
Once, in SE Asia, I was visiting close Chinese friends on Ancestral Grave Cleaning day, and we spent the day doing just that. It was a great time, visited 3 graveyards, etc. These were the great grandparents graves. Imagine my surprise to see grandchildren mentioned that I had no knowledge of, but my friend,s Mom explained. That it was really an old tradition, hardly followed anymore, whereby the dead ancestors were actually hoping to influence the names of future children’s children, by having them etched into their gravestones. Pretty sly, right? I also know someone who, while pregnant was warned by a sister in law, to not reveal the name until the baby was born at all costs. She had made this mistake, and spent the next 8 months being beset by the mother in law, who was opposed to the name. That’s some sage advice, in my opinion. Once the baby is born they’ll be too swept up in the joy to throw a snit of any real magnitude. It’s funny that people think they should have a say in naming someone else’s child, don’t ya think? I’ve always found it a little odd. ---
**Author:** ![Dangerosa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/22d042/32.png) [@Dangerosa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dangerosa)\ **Post date:** [March 19, 2012, 10:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-descendants-childrens-names/616172/43 "2012-03-19T22:40:10Z")
The one that gets me is “you can’t name her that. Becky and John, you know Becky and John - Diana’s friends from college…” (at this point you nod, you vaguely remember someone who might have been named Becky at Diana’s wedding) are naming their daughter that, and she’ll be born before yours. We’ll all get confused!" And about this time you think “I don’t think I’ve seen Diana in two years, and I only talk to you twice a year, and how much impact is knowing vaguely of two children named Fiona going to cause in your life?” This happened to me. A woman I met once named her daughter the same thing I named mine, and several people informed me I should pick a different name. (I can see this with kids who are going to be cousins of siblings who are close. Two grandchildren named Liam might be hard on grandma and might make Christmas tough. But even then, name claiming prior to conception should be forbidden - barring some special circumstances). ---
**Author:** ![Pocito](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/f04885/32.png) [@Pocito](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Pocito)\ **Post date:** [March 20, 2012, 12:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-descendants-childrens-names/616172/44 "2012-03-20T00:59:47Z")
When I found out I was having another boy (my third and last) my mother-in-law said (in the ultrasound room!), “You’re not going to name him something stupid like the other two, are you?” I still want to punch her in the face just thinking about it. My kids are almost five and two, and she still apologizes to people, like her friends or strangers, for their names…in front of me or the boys. “I don’t know why DIL (me) named them that. Aren’t they awful names?” FTR, the names are normal, somewhat old-fashioned names. Think Felix or Henry. This is why we never visit. ---
**Author:** ![Imago](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/85e7bf/32.png) [@Imago](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Imago)\ **Post date:** [March 20, 2012, 1:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-descendants-childrens-names/616172/45 "2012-03-20T01:02:58Z")
> [@Frylock](#): > > They’re our kids. We pick the names. No one else has anything to do with it. If we name our kid Quiggly, their job is not to say “Ew, Quiggly?!” but rather simply to welcome Quiggly into the world. I wish my name were Quiggly! Anyway, unless the name is going to cause the kid some serious distress, nobody has any say in it except you and the other parent. ---
**Author:** ![gwendee](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/35a633/32.png) [@gwendee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gwendee)\ **Post date:** [March 20, 2012, 1:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-descendants-childrens-names/616172/46 "2012-03-20T01:09:59Z")
> [@TriPolar](#): > > Remember the old Spanish saying “Arroz con cualquier otro nombre sigue siendo arroz” No love for this, yet? I laughed. ---
**Author:** ![Feyrat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/fbc32d/32.png) [@Feyrat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Feyrat)\ **Post date:** [March 20, 2012, 2:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-descendants-childrens-names/616172/47 "2012-03-20T02:39:56Z")
Yeah, my muy macho father-in-law informed me that our firstborn son had to be “Husband’s Name The Fourth,” as hubby is a Third. Just very casually in the middle of another conversation. I found it both insulting and amusing, as there will BE no firstborn son (we’re not having children) and when there IS a child in our lives, it will be 1. adopted (we like kids, we’re just not manufacturing any) and 2. a girl. I may name her Husband’s Name the Fourth just to spite him. Or at least, I may spend the first 6 months or so of the kid’s life letting him think that’s her name. His head may well explode at having the name given to someone both not-blood-related to him and female. And that would solve two problems! 😛 ---
**Author:** ![MsJinx](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/278dde/32.png) [@MsJinx](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MsJinx)\ **Post date:** [March 20, 2012, 7:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-descendants-childrens-names/616172/48 "2012-03-20T07:08:22Z")
My grandmother had a first and middle name for a girl that she proffered to both of her children. Six granddaughters, and not one had any variation of it. I don’t recall that she was upset. My mother offered a boy and a girl name when I was first pregnant. She wasn’t upset that neither was chosen. I’m glad they accepted the names I chose. First child has an unusual name that her father found when he met a little girl on a ski lift before we met. I loved it, too, and daughter says she has always loved it. When we were having daughter #2, I thought a common name wouldn’t do, that she’d feel cheated or something, and I came across a name I thought was perfect. Husband objected, due to the first child’s name being unusual that it looked like we were ‘making up’ names. I found a ‘real name’ that I could conceivably get my chosen name as a nickname. She says she loves her name, too, and rarely goes by the ‘real’ name. ---
**Author:** ![Beware\_of\_Doug](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/278dde/32.png) [@Beware\_of\_Doug](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beware_of_Doug)\ **Post date:** [March 20, 2012, 7:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-descendants-childrens-names/616172/49 "2012-03-20T07:34:16Z")
> [@Feyrat](#): > > Yeah, my muy macho father-in-law informed me that our firstborn son had to be “Husband’s Name The Fourth,” as hubby is a Third. Just very casually in the middle of another conversation. > > I found it both insulting and amusing, as there will BE no firstborn son (we’re not having children) and when there IS a child in our lives, it will be 1. adopted (we like kids, we’re just not manufacturing any) and 2. a girl. > > I may name her Husband’s Name the Fourth just to spite him. Call her Ivy. ---
**Author:** ![MLS](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/919ad9/32.png) [@MLS](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MLS)\ **Post date:** [March 20, 2012, 5:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-descendants-childrens-names/616172/50 "2012-03-20T17:33:53Z")
Agree that nobody except the parents has a say in what a child is named. Even though my daughter named her daughter after my MIL, whom I hated. I’d have rather had her named after MY mother. But my daughter said that although she loved that grandmother, too, she just didn’t like the sound of that name. Oh, well. Myself, I tried to give both daughters names that were NOT already in either family at all, to avoid bad feelings. Of course, then my MIL was able to come up with about a million relatives, all in “the old country” who had those names. I can’t win. ---
**Author:** ![Snickers](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/5daacb/32.png) [@Snickers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Snickers)\ **Post date:** [March 20, 2012, 6:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-descendants-childrens-names/616172/51 "2012-03-20T18:18:06Z")
I think Quiggly is a perfectly awesome name for your sprog. ---
**Author:** ![Kenm](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/bc79bd/32.png) [@Kenm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kenm)\ **Post date:** [March 20, 2012, 6:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-descendants-childrens-names/616172/52 "2012-03-20T18:31:47Z")
> [@Beware\_of\_Doug](#): > > Call her Ivy. I laughed. ---
**Author:** ![Annie-Xmas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ecc23a/32.png) [@Annie-Xmas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Annie-Xmas)\ **Post date:** [March 20, 2012, 8:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-descendants-childrens-names/616172/53 "2012-03-20T20:10:57Z")
I remember a letter to Miss Manners asking for advice on how to tell her son and daughter-in-law they could give their new baby the the mother’s maiden name as a last name (as opposed to the husband’s) as they planned to do. She wanted to know how she should tell them this. Miss Manners replied that if the woman ever brought up the subject, she would not hear the end of it if she lived to be 100. And basically to mind her own business. ---
**Author:** ![Hampshire](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/hampshire/32/4887_2.png) [@Hampshire](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hampshire)\ **Post date:** [March 20, 2012, 8:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-descendants-childrens-names/616172/54 "2012-03-20T20:43:57Z")
Some friends of ours had a naming fiasco with their son that was all stirred up by the mother-in-law and the husband being too much of a momma’s boy to stand up to her. They have a common last name like Smith. They chose a very simple first and middle name and wanted to name him John Paul Smith. They loved it, most everyone else thought it was simple and nice. Then MIL had to get involved. She’s from Thailand and demanded the baby have Thai dead grandpa’s middle name. Wife said “no way” but husband couldn’t tell mama no. They fought and fought. Wife finally said “fine, if he’s going to have your dad’s name as a middle name he’s also going to have my dad’s name!” And because the kid would have two middle names they decided his first name needed to be more formal. So John Paul Smith became Jonathan Chanarong Donald Smith. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-descendants-childrens-names/616172.md?page=2)