# Your favorite funny line from a movie **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [September 2, 2000, 7:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-favorite-funny-line-from-a-movie/31764 "2000-09-02T07:04:43Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 14\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![Plavacek](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/f05b48/32.png) [@Plavacek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Plavacek)\ **Post date:** [October 4, 2000, 7:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-favorite-funny-line-from-a-movie/31764/61 "2000-10-04T07:38:02Z")
“Tantra, baby!” “Xiang Kai Shek. Famous Chinese ruler guy. Starts with X.” “No, C. Chiang Kai Shek.” “Overall, it didn’t go all that badly.” “A girl is DEAD, Zack.” “Well I didn’t say it went perfectly.” All from Go. I love this movie to death. Am I alone? ---
**Author:** ![Sublight](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/439d5e/32.png) [@Sublight](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sublight)\ **Post date:** [October 4, 2000, 11:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-favorite-funny-line-from-a-movie/31764/62 "2000-10-04T11:30:50Z")
My favorite from The Jerk (probably mis-quoted) : [grandmother is reading Navin’s letter to the family] “I should be able to send more money home soon, as Patty says she’s going to give me a blow job.” –sublight. You mean I’m going to stay this color? ---
**Author:** ![TwistofFate](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/cdc98d/32.png) [@TwistofFate](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TwistofFate)\ **Post date:** [October 4, 2000, 12:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-favorite-funny-line-from-a-movie/31764/63 "2000-10-04T12:06:17Z")
from The Wedding Singer: “again, something that could have been brought to my attention YESTERDAY!!!” ---
**Author:** ![vanilla](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/f19dbf/32.png) [@vanilla](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/vanilla)\ **Post date:** [October 4, 2000, 1:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-favorite-funny-line-from-a-movie/31764/64 "2000-10-04T13:18:43Z")
“Let’s get naked and smoke”, Pia Zadora in John Waters’ Hairspray. ---
**Author:** ![WolfLover](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/90db22/32.png) [@WolfLover](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WolfLover)\ **Post date:** [October 4, 2000, 3:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-favorite-funny-line-from-a-movie/31764/65 "2000-10-04T15:07:05Z")
True Crime with Clint Eastwood, James Woods, and Denis Leary has some great one-liners… James Woods, editor: “I see a reporter who is about to tell me he has a hunch. I can’t fart loud enough to give you my opinion!!” James Woods: “Quit fucking Bob’s (Leary) wife. He doesn’t like it. You should have fucked my wife. I would have just punched you out.” Eastwood: “I did fuck your wife.” Woods: “Was she good?” When Bob (Leary) confronts Eastwood about his wife… Eastwood: “Well, Bob, just punch me and get it over with. Then go home and slap your wife, because she likes it!” ---
**Author:** ![Smitty](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e274bd/32.png) [@Smitty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Smitty)\ **Post date:** [October 4, 2000, 3:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-favorite-funny-line-from-a-movie/31764/66 "2000-10-04T15:35:34Z")
I don’t know why, but I find the line from Low Down Dirty Shame hilarious when Keenan says: “Git back ladies. Stop tuggin’ on my silk drawers” ---
**Author:** ![Shodan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/9f8e36/32.png) [@Shodan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shodan)\ **Post date:** [October 5, 2000, 12:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-favorite-funny-line-from-a-movie/31764/67 "2000-10-05T00:55:18Z")
“Life is pain, Princess. Anyone who says differently is selling something.” - The Princess Bride ---
**Author:** ![occ](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/8c91f0/32.png) [@occ](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/occ)\ **Post date:** [October 5, 2000, 2:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-favorite-funny-line-from-a-movie/31764/68 "2000-10-05T02:22:32Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by shay519 \* > \*\*And also from Pee Wee > > There’s no basement in the Alamo! > Speck! > \*\* “…a-a-and knitting, a-a-and knitting, a-a-and knitting…” Simone: Do you have any dreams? PW: Yeah. I’m all alone. I’m rolling a big donut, and theres a snake wearing a vest… ---
**Author:** ![Speaker\_for\_the\_Dead](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/c77e96/32.png) [@Speaker\_for\_the\_Dead](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Speaker_for_the_Dead)\ **Post date:** [October 5, 2000, 2:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-favorite-funny-line-from-a-movie/31764/69 "2000-10-05T02:40:18Z")
Two lines from it always tickle my funny bone A)Evil Dude: Goody little _kick_ shoes, goody little _kick_ shoes, goody lit-click- Good Dude (holding gun to evil’s head): Good, bad, I’m the guy with the gun _blast_ And B)When the witch is about to pour boiling water onto a guy, her pot gets hit by the guy (I can’t remember his name)'s shotgun. "Yo, she-bi\*ch, pick on someone your own size! He then procedes to hit her about 8 times with his gun. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![BrothaTJ](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/d07c76/32.png) [@BrothaTJ](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BrothaTJ)\ **Post date:** [October 5, 2000, 4:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-favorite-funny-line-from-a-movie/31764/70 "2000-10-05T04:04:02Z")
Tommy Boy, a great movie if you’re into physical comedy as well as great deliveries… Tom Callahan, Sr: “You can get a good look at a t-bone by sticking your head up a bull’s ass, but wouldn’t you rather take a butcher’s word for it?” Tommy Callahan, Jr (yelling from his stationary sailboat on a calm lake to rowdy kids insulting him from the shore): “You better pray to the god of skinny punks that this wind doesn’t pick up! Cuz if it does, I’m gonna come over there and shove an oar up your ass!” Beavis and Butt-Head Do America was another one of my faves…(and I’m damn proud of it!) Agent Bork: Chief! Ya know that guy whose camper they were whackin’ off in? Agent Fleming (voiced by Robert Stack): Bork, you’re a federal agent! You represent the United States Government! Never end a sentence with a preposition! Agent Bork: Oh, uh… Ya know that guy in whose camper they… I… I mean, that guy off in whose camper they were whacking? ---
**Author:** ![Stoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/stoid/32/272_2.png) [@Stoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Stoid)\ **Post date:** [October 8, 2000, 10:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-favorite-funny-line-from-a-movie/31764/71 "2000-10-08T22:23:40Z")
A new favorite from Almost Famous: “Your looks are starting to be a problem.” And from Mystery Men: “We are Number 1. Everyone else is #2 or lower.” But I’m weird. stoid ---
**Author:** ![JuanDeCuba](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/a87d85/32.png) [@JuanDeCuba](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JuanDeCuba)\ **Post date:** [October 9, 2000, 12:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-favorite-funny-line-from-a-movie/31764/72 "2000-10-09T00:26:44Z")
From the princess bride (I may get this slightly wrong): Inigo: Stop the rhymes, and I mean it. Fezzic: Anybody want a peanut? The Powerpuff Girls used that line and I heard it there first. I almost died laughing when I saw the Princess Bride and realized where it came from, especially considering the contrast between Bubbles and Fezzic. ---
**Author:** ![THespos](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/8c91f0/32.png) [@THespos](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/THespos)\ **Post date:** [October 9, 2000, 7:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-favorite-funny-line-from-a-movie/31764/73 "2000-10-09T19:20:28Z")
The beginning of Full Metal Jacket cracks me up: Sarge: How tall are you, private? Private: Sir! Five foot nine, Sir! Sarge: Five foot nine? I didn’t know they stacked sh-t that high! You tryin’ to squeeze an inch in on me somewhere? Huh? Private: Sir! No, sir! Sarge: Bullsh-t! It looks to me like the best part of you ran down the crack of your momma’s a-- and ended up as a brown stain on the mattress! I think you’ve been cheated! Where in the hell are you from anyway, private? Private: Sir! Texas, sir! Sarge: Holy dog sh-t! Texas?! Only steers and queers come from Texas, Private Cowboy, and you don’t much look like a steer to me, so that kinda narrows it down! Do you suck d-cks? Private: Sir! No, sir! Sarge: Are you a peter puffer?! Private: Sir! No, sir! Sarge: I’ll bet you’re the kind of guy that would f-ck a person in the a-- and not even have the goddamn common courtesy to give him a reach around! I’ll be watching you! ---
**Author:** ![panamajack](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/47e85d/32.png) [@panamajack](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/panamajack)\ **Post date:** [October 9, 2000, 8:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-favorite-funny-line-from-a-movie/31764/74 "2000-10-09T20:40:41Z")
My favorite quickly-tossed-off line is from **History of the World, Pt. I** : “Oedipus! What’s up, motherfucker!” (It took me several viewings to catch that.) from **Real Genius** : “This? This is ice. It’s what happens to water when it gets too cold.” and from **Airplane!** : Capt. Oever’s questions to Joey - “Joey, have you ever been in the cockpit of an airplane before?” … “Ever seen a grown man naked?” … “Joey, do you like to watch gladiator movies?” … “Have you ever been in a Turkish prison?” also almost all of Johnny’s lines : McCrosky : “Johnny, what do you make of this?” Johnny : “I can make a bird, or a brooch, or, ooh, a pterodactyl!” McCrosky : “We need someone who knows the plane inside and out, and won’t crack under pressure.” Johnny: “How about Mr. Rogers?” Striker : “Mayday, Mayday!” McCrosky : “Mayday!? What does that mean?” Johnny : “Mayday? Why, that’s the Russian New Year! We’ll have a parade, I’ll throw a party …” “The fog’s getting thicker!” Johnny : “And Leon’s getting laaaarrrger!” [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-favorite-funny-line-from-a-movie/31764.md?page=3)