# Your Gay Lifestyle. What's it like, really? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [April 30, 2003, 6:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-gay-lifestyle-whats-it-like-really/172096 "2003-04-30T06:59:42Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 10\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![Esprix](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/esprix/32/7899_2.png) [@Esprix](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Esprix)\ **Post date:** [May 2, 2003, 6:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-gay-lifestyle-whats-it-like-really/172096/41 "2003-05-02T18:46:36Z")
Good heavens! I had no idea those pictures would end up in the wrong hands! I was young, I was foolish, I needed the money… Curse you, Herb Ritts (bless his heart!)! But those ads of which you speak must be for veritable fountains of youth - for surely, how could you improve upon the perfection of the “before” picture? 😉 Esprix ---
**Author:** ![Tusculan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ecd19e/32.png) [@Tusculan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tusculan)\ **Post date:** [May 2, 2003, 7:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-gay-lifestyle-whats-it-like-really/172096/42 "2003-05-02T19:34:01Z")
Wonderful, **Esprix**! Now I know what Oscar Wilde would have done, had he lived in this day an age. He’d have posted on SDMB! ---
**Author:** ![Daowajan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/3bc359/32.png) [@Daowajan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Daowajan)\ **Post date:** [May 2, 2003, 10:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-gay-lifestyle-whats-it-like-really/172096/43 "2003-05-02T22:44:45Z")
^^^ Yeah, and if he’d gotten really into it, no one outside these boards would ever know who he was! 😃 Okay, I decided to come back here and give a serious answer, because this is a cool thread. After all, it’s Friday afternoon. 8:30 - Alarm goes off. 8:45 - Alarm goes off. 9:00 - Alarm goes off. 9:06 - I got out of bed and got dressed. Then I turned on my computer and checked my e-mail. There wasn’t anything very important or interesting there, or else I would have remembered it. 9:55 - Arrived at math class, talked nonsense with the kids who’ve sat near me all semester. After 10 minutes, the professor still hadn’t shown, so most of the people left. We figure he probably missed the bus. That’s ok, it happens to everyone. 10:10 or so - I went to get a real breakfast. Unfortunately, the only place still serving breakfast was the student union, and I got a paper plate of scrambled eggs that prior to grilling was a yellow soup in a big plastic bucket that the guy working the grill had ladled out. I was worried, but more hungry than worried. I didn’t experience any ill effects, so it goes toward my theory that my stomach can handle anything. Maybe I’ll go the route of that guy in France who eats metal. 11:00 - Time for English Major Boot Camp! Actually, it’s pre-1800 English Lit, but it’s required for everyone and pretty painful to boot. We’re currently stumbling through Gulliver’s Travels. 12:00 - 4:15 or so - Came home, ate lunch, cleaned the room, called and wished my mom happy birthday. I checked the mail and got a package with a flesh-colored bra I’d ordered some weeks ago, so I can wear white T-shirts made of thin fabric. I also did laundry and sat in the laundry room reading a book of literary criticism on Gulliver’s Travels (yup, there’s a paper due on Friday) to try to get me thinking about it. 4:45 - Food. Right Now: I’m supposed to be revising a piece of short fiction I got workshopped in class about a month back. The revision’s due Tuesday. But, of course, I’m actually posting this. 😉 Later: First off, I will work on those revisions. ~9:00 - Shower, get dressed and get ready to go out. ~10:00 - Arrive at dance, locate a couple of friends and talk about random stuff for a while, read any new pamphlets or stickers there, then go line up the ladies. 😃 After that: I have no idea. ---
**Author:** ![Esprix](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/esprix/32/7899_2.png) [@Esprix](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Esprix)\ **Post date:** [May 2, 2003, 11:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-gay-lifestyle-whats-it-like-really/172096/44 "2003-05-02T23:32:45Z")
I’ve got an idea, you hot mamma you! 😃 Esprix ---
**Author:** ![scott\_evil](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/91b2a8/32.png) [@scott\_evil](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/scott_evil)\ **Post date:** [May 3, 2003, 10:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-gay-lifestyle-whats-it-like-really/172096/45 "2003-05-03T22:36:07Z")
Well, today’s been a rather typical Saturday of errands. Jeremy and I got up around 1:30 PM, had coffee, showered, got dressed, and headed out. We stopped by an optical store to see if he could get his glasses fixed (he broke them last night :(). Then we hopped on the metro and got our hair cut at a little salon in Westmount. Back on the metro and then a little walk to St-Laurent. Picked up some coffee, then Jer checked out an army surplus store there. A nice walk down St-Laurent, with me pointing out the snotty restos, then on the metro once again. Bought some new boxers and socks, then to the pharmacy to pick up prescriptions and other stuff (shampoo, soap, deodorant, condoms, toothpaste, etc.). Get home. Make coffee. Jer does the laundry, cleans the bathroom, vacuums. I do the dishes and prepare a snack. Later we’ll head to the grocery store and pick up most of what we need for a week. I’ll make a nice dinner, and we’ll watch _My Big Fat Greek Wedding_, which we rented last night but, um, _didn’t get around to watching_, if you know what I mean. 😉 Then we’ll have really twisted and decidedly non-vanilla sex. :eek: ---
**Author:** ![matt\_mcl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/7ab992/32.png) [@matt\_mcl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/matt_mcl)\ **Post date:** [May 4, 2003, 4:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-gay-lifestyle-whats-it-like-really/172096/46 "2003-05-04T04:02:54Z")
woo! well. yesterday I woke up around ten, loafed around for most of the morning, talked with the boi. then around 2 I went up to Mom and Dad’s house to help with Dad. It was really tough because he was very exhausted yesterday, he only ate part of a bagel and then crashed on the sofa. I watched over him while Mom did some errands and grabbed a nap. While there I called the STM, who I’d hoped to work for, and found I probably wouldn’t be getting the job, and I wouldn’t know until Monday _wheee, a chance to stew._ It really sucked the life out of me, so I went home and complained about it with the boi. had a good crying jag and a nice long, gentle conversation (and some decidedly ungentle umpty afterwards…) Then I went out to the Pagan Resource Centre’s Beltane ritual. Had a wonderful time, and went to Mom and Dad’s again to help Dad get into bed. He was very, very overtired and too confused to get to bed upstairs, so we bunked him down in the guest room downstairs, which we had set up for my aunt and uncle. Mom was pretty exhausted and upset, so I took care of her for a while while getting the rest of the bedding set up. Then I went home, futzed around on the puter a little longer, then crashed. This morning I woke up and futzed around on the computer still longer, then went to the Pagan Resource Centre’s Beltane fair and fundraiser. Got a momma’s day gift (soap and bath fizzies) and a birthday prez for my ex Éric (a pretty leather cuff). Came home, tried to chat up the boi but he was having his puter repaired. Chatted with **Freyr** a bit, and abruptly realized I was late for another Beltane rit. This Beltane is particularly important to me since it comes at a turning point for the boi and me in our relationship. Had another wonderful, energetic, and mystical rit (including an indoor maypole dance) and stayed for a long time to chat and hang out with the other folks there. Lost my shirt - dammit! but it will turn up - and head home. Soon to crash. Must check on my sweater that was drying, tho. There you have it, the life of an unemployed Pagan fag in an LDR with a sick dad. That’s most of my life right now. ---
**Author:** ![superstar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/f4b2a3/32.png) [@superstar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/superstar)\ **Post date:** [May 4, 2003, 7:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-gay-lifestyle-whats-it-like-really/172096/47 "2003-05-04T07:43:36Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Iteki \* > \*\*Was woken from my nightly coma with a cup of tea by mrsIteki as this was one of the rare days my unemployed self goes to work. She was already showered and dressed, even though we leave the house at the same time, she can’t go to work looking and feeling like a zombie. I can 😃 > > I got home first, and sat on my bum playing with my computer till she got home. We went through our standard “welcome home” ritual, which is the same one we had when I was working and she wasn’t, hugs in the hall, one takes the bags into the kitchen while the other takes of their shoes and hangs up their coat, and then out to the kitchen for a smoke under the extractor-fan-thingy over the stove. We sit opposite eachother, always the same way, me with my back to the window because I am taller and it keeps the sun out of her eyes while we catch up on what happened at work. Once work chat is out of the way, “our day” begins. > > We unpacked the groceries lauched and complained about having forgotten to buy sugar for my tea for the 5th time we have been to the store. Must remember to get it today, and cheese, we need more cheese for sammiges. We sat around listening to music and playing video games until we started whining “I’m huuungry” at eachother. Whoever gets sick of the whining first cooks, usually. I generally win. This time however, I ended up on kitchen duty. I am great at cooking big meals like sunday dinner, but not to great at “quick supper for two” so mrsIteki was a little suspicious of my offerings (a sort of rice soup with corn and dry-roasted peanuts… don’t ask…) but admitted it was very nice and I could make it again 😃 We hung out in the sitting room for the rest of the evening, listening to CDs and gossiping with friends on the net. We really need more furniture, cos I want to be able to snuggle on the couch (need a couch first). We were both totally busted, so we went off to bed at 9, but ended up chatting for 2 hours instead of going to sleep. It may not be an exciting life, but it is a good one, and we like it. A lot. > > MrVisible, can I steal this quote? I love it. “Except we don’t call them lifestyles; we call them our lives.” \*\* After sitting here and reading all the posts regarding this thread, and Iteki’s is the one most similar to my life. Except my partner has a 9 year old boy, but apart from the picking up from school stuff etc it’s the same. One of my ‘friends’ - and i use the term lightly… very lightly, thinks my life is one big orgy! So rather than telling about my life i thought i would share the life THEY think i live!!! I awake with a big hangover from the night before, which was spent dirty dancing at some crazy gay nightclub. Then i shag for the first hour of the day and drag myself to work. I’m probably wearing a singlet, work boots and army pants, and i’m considering shaving my head and getting a tattoo with my girlfriends name on it. At work i download pictures of naked chicks, and spend my lunchtimes checking out other girls tits!! I’m hot for every girl i know, especially my friends, and having sex is all i can think about. I don’t go to movies anymore unless they have Lesbian in them , and i subscibe to sex shops and recieve things in brown paper packages, containing lots of leather. Whenever i look at my friends i’m having sexual thoughts, and if they touch me i’m going to try and jump them! I take speed, and ectasy and drink too much, and am letting the hair grow under my arms and anywhere else i can. When i get home i call up my gay friends and invite them around to share partners. I then crawl into bed with whoever lasted the night and start the same day all over again!!! :rolleyes: ---
**Author:** ![djf750](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ea666f/32.png) [@djf750](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/djf750)\ **Post date:** [May 4, 2003, 4:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-gay-lifestyle-whats-it-like-really/172096/48 "2003-05-04T16:37:36Z")
Well, I wasn’t gay when I started reading this , but after reading Esprix’s posts and laughing my ass off…well I’m still not gay. But I’m happier. ---
**Author:** ![TVGuy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/82dd89/32.png) [@TVGuy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TVGuy)\ **Post date:** [May 4, 2003, 9:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-gay-lifestyle-whats-it-like-really/172096/49 "2003-05-04T21:45:12Z")
My gay lifestyle, huh? I spent Saturday on my motorcycle. Alone. I finished reading a book on Saturday night. OH!! Friday night was spent shopping, though. …for groceries. And this afternoon, I sit here ripping CD’s, doing laundry and paying bills. Yup, I’m just THE most fabulous of the fabulous. THE raging, dancing Queen you’ve all come to expect. Later, I think I’ll wash the car. ---
**Author:** ![MrVisible](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/46a35a/32.png) [@MrVisible](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MrVisible)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2003, 8:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-gay-lifestyle-whats-it-like-really/172096/50 "2003-05-13T08:27:12Z")
I just wanted to revive this thread to thank everybody who has posted. I think, from the data gathered here, we can come to some conclusions about gay people. Gay people: Own Dogs Own Cats Own Fish Go to Zoos Play videogames Watch TV Cook Food Eat at Restaurants Sleep Work Wear Clothes Wash Dishes Drink Alcohol Don’t Drink Alcohol Go To Church Participate in Pagan Rituals Don’t Go To Church Bathe Snore Do Ring Homomorphism Proofs Cuddle Get Laid Off Brush Their Teeth Are Healthy Have Health Problems Are In Bad Relationships Are In Good Relationships Are Single Are Promiscuous Are Monogamous Drink Coffee Drink Tea Are Incredibly Busy Are Amazingly Lazy Work Out Study Read Books Watch Enterprise Eat Chinese Take-Out Have Kids Don’t Have Kids Argue Dance Shop Have Babies! (Congrats, **KellyM**!) Break Their Glasses Do Housework Watch Movies Have Kinky Sex Take Care Of Sick Relatives Love Their Mothers Ride Motorcycles Do Laundry And so, what can we conclude about this group? Well, pretty much nothing. Except that gay people, for some reason, are all computer literate and hang out on certain message boards. But that may be a problem with the sample. Oh, and gay people seem to have an almost universal aversion to waking up in the morning. Thanks for posting, folks. I think every one of you is completely fabulous. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-gay-lifestyle-whats-it-like-really/172096.md?page=2)