# Your gender identification -or- What are you, a boy or a girl? **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [May 6, 2018, 1:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-gender-identification-or-what-are-you-a-boy-or-a-girl/813680 "2018-05-06T01:56:58Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![dropzone](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dropzone/32/7515_2.png) [@dropzone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dropzone)\ **Post date:** [May 7, 2018, 5:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-gender-identification-or-what-are-you-a-boy-or-a-girl/813680/61 "2018-05-07T17:09:30Z")
> [@Nava](#): > > I’m a woman who hates being called a girl. Would you prefer chiquita? 😉 > [@DavidwithanR](#): > > By “gender”… You’re thinking this through too much. I have been led astray by a person’s living as a man, and when I learned otherwise I shrugged it off with a snappy reference to a cliche, “That explains the Jeep,” but on a very real level I don’t care what anybody online considers themself, and have welcomed the rise of the third person singular indefinite pronoun because it relieves me of the need to think or remember. But I asked anyway to be polite. ---
**Author:** ![eulalia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/eulalia/32/457_2.png) [@eulalia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/eulalia)\ **Post date:** [May 7, 2018, 5:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-gender-identification-or-what-are-you-a-boy-or-a-girl/813680/62 "2018-05-07T17:27:56Z")
> [@puzzlegal](#): > > That’s what I would have thought. And fwiw, I think one of the reasons I am comfortable as a masculine woman is that no one criticized me for my lack of gender conformity as a child. (well, not my family, not my teachers, and to the extent some of my peers did, they weren’t clear enough on what made them uncomfortable with me to criticise me for it.) > > But I am told that many people have a strong internal sense of gender identity, including some people who are very feminine women or uber-masculine men. So I think there’s something there that I’m just missing. (and perhaps you are, too.) You’re lucky. I got called “queer” and had no idea what they meant. I never wanted to be a man, was never attracted to women, but I was never very good at being ladylike. ---
**Author:** ![Dung\_Beetle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dung_beetle/32/7945_2.png) [@Dung\_Beetle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dung_Beetle)\ **Post date:** [May 7, 2018, 6:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-gender-identification-or-what-are-you-a-boy-or-a-girl/813680/63 "2018-05-07T18:07:52Z")
I’m strictly a female female. ---
**Author:** ![BigT](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bigt/32/12044_2.png) [@BigT](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BigT)\ **Post date:** [May 7, 2018, 7:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-gender-identification-or-what-are-you-a-boy-or-a-girl/813680/64 "2018-05-07T19:08:45Z")
> [@Chronos](#): > > I have a penis and testicles, I don’t have a vagina, ovaries, or developed breasts, my facial hair grows out if I let it, and my voice is bass. I’ve never had my hormones or chromosomes tested, but I expect that they would probably come out with high testosterone and low estrogen, and XY. I’m attracted to women. And I’m fine with all of those facts. But I have no idea how to tell what my gender identity is. None of those really matter. When you describe yourself, do you call yourself a man or a woman? If you were introduced as “that woman over there is **Chronos** ” would that fit with your perception of yourself? If someone asked where you were, and you overheard the answer as “ **Chronos**? She’s over there,” would that seem incongruous or make perfect sense? Let’s say you make some sort of scientific discovery, and the headline in the news is “Woman discovers \_\_\_\_\_,” would that bother you in any way? (Feel free to substitute your real name for your username, of course.) Based on how I have seen you refer to yourself here, you seem to be male. I likewise am male. My answer to all those questions is “man” and yes to all. ---
**Author:** ![Sunspace](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sunspace/32/1250_2.png) [@Sunspace](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sunspace)\ **Post date:** [May 7, 2018, 7:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-gender-identification-or-what-are-you-a-boy-or-a-girl/813680/65 "2018-05-07T19:40:05Z")
I am a male mind in a male body. However much internally I slop over toward the middle of the scale, both in who I am attracted to and how I present myself, I still like being attached to one end of a penis. > [@BeepKillBeep](#): > > _beep_ disembodied artificial intelligence _beep_ And here I thought that you had at least one mighty mechanical arm… ---
**Author:** ![Inigo\_Montoya](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/inigo_montoya/32/124_2.png) [@Inigo\_Montoya](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Inigo_Montoya)\ **Post date:** [May 7, 2018, 7:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-gender-identification-or-what-are-you-a-boy-or-a-girl/813680/66 "2018-05-07T19:46:15Z")
XY with functioning boyparts. Pretty sure I’m unremarkable in this regard, but there is strong evidence I’m a lesbian making the best of being trapped in a guy’s body. ---
**Author:** ![puzzlegal](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/puzzlegal/32/3827_2.png) [@puzzlegal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/puzzlegal)\ **Post date:** [May 7, 2018, 8:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-gender-identification-or-what-are-you-a-boy-or-a-girl/813680/67 "2018-05-07T20:01:55Z")
(edited for the circumstance) > [@BigT](#): > > None of those really matter. When you describe yourself, do you call yourself a man or a woman? woman > [@BigT](#): > > If you were introduced as “that [strike]wo[/strike]man over there is **Chronos** ” would that fit with your perception of yourself? close enough. > [@BigT](#): > > If someone asked where you were, and you overheard the answer as “ **Puzzlegal**? [/strike]S[/strike]he’s over there,” would that seem incongruous or make perfect sense? It’s happened. (over the internet, not in person) I was mildly amused. > [@BigT](#): > > Let’s say you make some sort of scientific discovery, and the headline in the news is “[strike]Wo[/strike]man discovers \_\_\_\_\_,” would that bother you in any way? (Feel free to substitute your real name for your username, of course.)… Yes, that would bother me. But mostly because stuff done by women tends to get minimized or ignored, and I find that offensive, and wouldn’t want to participate in that problem. ---
**Author:** ![puzzlegal](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/puzzlegal/32/3827_2.png) [@puzzlegal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/puzzlegal)\ **Post date:** [May 7, 2018, 8:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-gender-identification-or-what-are-you-a-boy-or-a-girl/813680/68 "2018-05-07T20:03:18Z")
Hmm, I guess you can’t strike out letters here. Just imagine I put a line through the letters enclosed by [strike][/strike] ---
**Author:** ![Dung\_Beetle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dung_beetle/32/7945_2.png) [@Dung\_Beetle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dung_Beetle)\ **Post date:** [May 7, 2018, 8:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-gender-identification-or-what-are-you-a-boy-or-a-girl/813680/69 "2018-05-07T20:24:39Z")
> [@puzzlegal](#): > > Hmm, I guess you can’t strike out letters here. Just imagine I put a line through the letters enclosed by [strike][/strike] You can; it’s [del] [/ del]. ---
**Author:** ![mikecurtis](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mikecurtis/32/3284_2.png) [@mikecurtis](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mikecurtis)\ **Post date:** [May 7, 2018, 8:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-gender-identification-or-what-are-you-a-boy-or-a-girl/813680/70 "2018-05-07T20:26:17Z")
ninja’d! ---
**Author:** ![Arabella\_Flynn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/8491ac/32.png) [@Arabella\_Flynn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Arabella_Flynn)\ **Post date:** [May 7, 2018, 9:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-gender-identification-or-what-are-you-a-boy-or-a-girl/813680/71 "2018-05-07T21:03:05Z")
Female. Obvious guess from the username. Although when I’ve written other things under gender-neutral usernames, I’m generally taken for male, and often as much older than I am. ---
**Author:** ![TroutMan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/troutman/32/6721_2.png) [@TroutMan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TroutMan)\ **Post date:** [May 7, 2018, 9:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-gender-identification-or-what-are-you-a-boy-or-a-girl/813680/72 "2018-05-07T21:27:41Z")
As you can tell from my username, I am a fish. ---
**Author:** ![burpo\_the\_wonder\_mutt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/burpo_the_wonder_mutt/32/365_2.png) [@burpo\_the\_wonder\_mutt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/burpo_the_wonder_mutt)\ **Post date:** [May 7, 2018, 9:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-gender-identification-or-what-are-you-a-boy-or-a-girl/813680/73 "2018-05-07T21:30:04Z")
^ Should it be **Trout, Man**!? ---
**Author:** ![Beckdawrek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/beckdawrek/32/3647_2.png) [@Beckdawrek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beckdawrek)\ **Post date:** [May 7, 2018, 9:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-gender-identification-or-what-are-you-a-boy-or-a-girl/813680/74 "2018-05-07T21:35:35Z")
> [@Nava](#): > > I’m a woman who hates being called a girl. “I enjoy being a girl” ---
**Author:** ![begbert2](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/begbert2/32/3357_2.png) [@begbert2](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/begbert2)\ **Post date:** [May 7, 2018, 11:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-gender-identification-or-what-are-you-a-boy-or-a-girl/813680/75 "2018-05-07T23:30:45Z")
I’m male. Specifically, a boring male. ---
**Author:** ![Jennshark](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/8e8cbc/32.png) [@Jennshark](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jennshark)\ **Post date:** [May 7, 2018, 11:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-gender-identification-or-what-are-you-a-boy-or-a-girl/813680/76 "2018-05-07T23:42:44Z")
> [@puzzlegal](#): > > That’s what I would have thought. And fwiw, I think one of the reasons I am comfortable as a masculine woman is that no one criticized me for my lack of gender conformity as a child. (well, not my family, not my teachers, and to the extent some of my peers did, they weren’t clear enough on what made them uncomfortable with me to criticise me for it.) > > But I am told that many people have a strong internal sense of gender identity, including some people who are very feminine women or uber-masculine men. So I think there’s something there that I’m just missing. (and perhaps you are, too.) I really like the way you put this. My work wives are uber-feminine and I just don’t get it; I’m struggling to think of any interests or tastes I have that would be labelled as very feminine. ---
**Author:** ![dropzone](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dropzone/32/7515_2.png) [@dropzone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dropzone)\ **Post date:** [May 8, 2018, 1:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-gender-identification-or-what-are-you-a-boy-or-a-girl/813680/77 "2018-05-08T01:04:54Z")
Same as me for masculine interests. Sports? Nope. “So you’re gay?” : old rolleyes : But I say nothing regarding my theory that too much obsessing about fit, young men in their skivvies might indicate something. 😉 Okay, sometimes I do, but since they’re guys it goes straight over their heads. Guys are dumb like dogs. ---
**Author:** ![Green\_Bean](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/green_bean/32/1760_2.png) [@Green\_Bean](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Green_Bean)\ **Post date:** [May 8, 2018, 1:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-gender-identification-or-what-are-you-a-boy-or-a-girl/813680/78 "2018-05-08T01:51:53Z")
> [@puzzlegal](#): > > But I am told that many people have a strong internal sense of gender identity, including some people who are very feminine women or uber-masculine men. So I think there’s something there that I’m just missing. (and perhaps you are, too.) I think that for most people, it’s just not that complicated. When I was born, they said “It’s a girl” and nothing that’s happened in the ensuing 47 years has caused me to question that. Does that mean I have a “strong internal sense of gender identity?” I dunno. I guess? I do have some traits amd interests that would be more commonly associated with males, but that’s just normal human variation. ---
**Author:** ![dropzone](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dropzone/32/7515_2.png) [@dropzone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dropzone)\ **Post date:** [May 8, 2018, 4:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-gender-identification-or-what-are-you-a-boy-or-a-girl/813680/79 "2018-05-08T04:11:29Z")
I actually knew that, **Green Bean**. I also know not to mistake you for **Stringbean** , who has apparently put himself in the beanfield. ---
**Author:** ![Nava](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/da6949/32.png) [@Nava](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nava)\ **Post date:** [May 8, 2018, 5:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-gender-identification-or-what-are-you-a-boy-or-a-girl/813680/80 "2018-05-08T05:54:15Z")
> [@dropzone](#): > > Would you prefer chiquita? 😉 Depends on the tone and the person. Is it a form of address they would normally use for women my age? Coming from you, the answer is “not”, so it would get you called _tocagüevos_. Really, dude… :rolleyes: I don’t so much have “a strong sense of gender identity” as come from a culture where and unlike in some of our closest neighbors women were not considered legally incapable, people of both sexes were entitled to equal education and expected to be able to take care of themselves, and from a time where sex-based barriers (género being a word which didn’t get applied to people at the time and in that place) were being brought down speedily. The only person who expected my groin to determine my future was my born-elsewhere mother, and if she’d had all sons she would just have picked one of them as her designed caretaker. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-gender-identification-or-what-are-you-a-boy-or-a-girl/813680.md?page=3) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-gender-identification-or-what-are-you-a-boy-or-a-girl/813680.md?page=5)