# Your internal monologue, do you refer to yourself in the 1st person or second person? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [February 25, 2008, 12:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-internal-monologue-do-you-refer-to-yourself-in-the-1st-person-or-second-person/439019 "2008-02-25T00:48:54Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![don\_t\_ask](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e68b1a/32.png) [@don\_t\_ask](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/don_t_ask)\ **Post date:** [February 25, 2008, 1:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-internal-monologue-do-you-refer-to-yourself-in-the-1st-person-or-second-person/439019/21 "2008-02-25T13:17:59Z")
Third person - like: He makes it rub the lotion on its skin, or else it gets the hose again. ---
**Author:** ![beanpod](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/a9adbd/32.png) [@beanpod](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/beanpod)\ **Post date:** [February 25, 2008, 2:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-internal-monologue-do-you-refer-to-yourself-in-the-1st-person-or-second-person/439019/22 "2008-02-25T14:29:37Z")
1st person if I’m reminding myself of something or trying to plan something out. 2nd person if I’m annoyed at myself or trying to psyche myself up. 3rd person, rarely, when I do something stupid in front of people and laugh at myself. ---
**Author:** ![supergoose](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/aeb1de/32.png) [@supergoose](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/supergoose)\ **Post date:** [February 25, 2008, 3:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-internal-monologue-do-you-refer-to-yourself-in-the-1st-person-or-second-person/439019/23 "2008-02-25T15:35:59Z")
All three. Basically, there are three voices in my head: me, my critical voice, and the one I think of as my motherly voice (completely honest, but kind and encouraging as opposed to denigrating like the critical voice is). ‘Me’ is, well, me, using ‘I,’ ‘me,’ ‘my,’ etc. Both other voices speak to ‘me’ (as ‘you’) and about me, and all three of us acknowledge at times (to my critical voice’s dismay) that there’s only one person here, me (‘we’). They both sort of have personalities, but very flat ones. And I do kind of have an image of what they both look like (they’re both female). No names, though. So I’m not actually off my rocker, I swear. My therapist once said that these additional voices are often the internalized voices of people we know. My motherly voice reminds me of my mother, and, sadly, the critical one of my father. Although my critical voice says much worse things to me than he ever has. It’s more the way I perceived him to feel about me when I was a kid. I know now that he loves me and always has, and is doing the best he can with the limited resources his screwed up childhood left him with, which is why I hope he never never \*never \*finds out about him being the mean voice in my head. That’s a pretty horrifying legacy to leave with your child, to always be the voice in their head telling them how awful they are. Which means that you are all now officially sworn to secrecy. ---
**Author:** ![Mahna\_Mahna](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/e47c2d/32.png) [@Mahna\_Mahna](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mahna_Mahna)\ **Post date:** [February 25, 2008, 3:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-internal-monologue-do-you-refer-to-yourself-in-the-1st-person-or-second-person/439019/24 "2008-02-25T15:57:49Z")
Usually first person. Though when scolding myself for doing something stupid, I switch to second person… usually in my mom’s voice. :smack: ---
**Author:** ![RedRosesForMe](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/91b2a8/32.png) [@RedRosesForMe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RedRosesForMe)\ **Post date:** [February 25, 2008, 4:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-internal-monologue-do-you-refer-to-yourself-in-the-1st-person-or-second-person/439019/25 "2008-02-25T16:02:07Z")
[QUOTE=eleanorigby] Both. And sometimes I even go regal on my own ass and refer to myself as “we”. [/QUOTE] I’m with **eleanor** here. And I’m glad someone else does it, too, because the royal “we” bit makes me question my sanity. ---
**Author:** ![Paintcharge](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/paintcharge/32/7946_2.png) [@Paintcharge](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Paintcharge)\ **Post date:** [February 25, 2008, 4:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-internal-monologue-do-you-refer-to-yourself-in-the-1st-person-or-second-person/439019/26 "2008-02-25T16:04:10Z")
I usually just call myself “Dumbass.” As in “OK, dumbass, step away from the computer and actually do some work today.” ---
**Author:** ![Antinor01](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ecae2f/32.png) [@Antinor01](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Antinor01)\ **Post date:** [February 25, 2008, 4:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-internal-monologue-do-you-refer-to-yourself-in-the-1st-person-or-second-person/439019/27 "2008-02-25T16:29:09Z")
In order of usage:3rd person, second person royal we, and sometimes 1st person. ---
**Author:** ![jackdavinci](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jackdavinci/32/3259_2.png) [@jackdavinci](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jackdavinci)\ **Post date:** [February 25, 2008, 6:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-internal-monologue-do-you-refer-to-yourself-in-the-1st-person-or-second-person/439019/28 "2008-02-25T18:34:50Z")
uhh… neither? The only internal dialogue (or should we say monologue!) I have that’s remotely “wordy” is when prepping for a conversation or argument I imagine I’m likely to have later, in which case I imagine myself in my own role speaking as I normally would to another person. In cases where my internal dialogue is just thinking about stuff, there’s no monologue voice over to speak of, it’s just the thing itself. ---
**Author:** ![Amygdala](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/e79b87/32.png) [@Amygdala](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Amygdala)\ **Post date:** [February 25, 2008, 7:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-internal-monologue-do-you-refer-to-yourself-in-the-1st-person-or-second-person/439019/29 "2008-02-25T19:13:04Z")
I tend to narrate my life in my head, like I’m telling a story. When I do that it’s in first person, past tense, or sometimes third person, past tense. I know. I’m weird. If I’m just reminding myself to do something, or taking note of my emotional state, I don’t really think about it in words. Those thoughts are more of a general awareness for me. ---
**Author:** ![TroubleAgain](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/e480ec/32.png) [@TroubleAgain](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TroubleAgain)\ **Post date:** [February 25, 2008, 7:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-internal-monologue-do-you-refer-to-yourself-in-the-1st-person-or-second-person/439019/30 "2008-02-25T19:30:38Z")
[QUOTE=eleanorigby] Both. And sometimes I even go regal on my own ass and refer to myself as “we”. [/QUOTE] 😃 First person for normal stuff, second person if I’m giving myself a mental ass-reaming, and the occasional regal “we” if I’m feeling playful. ---
**Author:** ![Fetchund](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/b2d939/32.png) [@Fetchund](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fetchund)\ **Post date:** [February 26, 2008, 12:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-internal-monologue-do-you-refer-to-yourself-in-the-1st-person-or-second-person/439019/31 "2008-02-26T00:13:26Z")
Not only is my self-critical voice always second person, but it always uses my last name. The rest is in first person. ---
**Author:** ![Katriona](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/katriona/32/113_2.png) [@Katriona](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Katriona)\ **Post date:** [February 26, 2008, 12:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-internal-monologue-do-you-refer-to-yourself-in-the-1st-person-or-second-person/439019/32 "2008-02-26T00:20:56Z")
[QUOTE=SpectBrain] For example do you say to yourself “I need to do the dishes now!” or “You need to do the dishes now!”? [/QUOTE] When I was a kid, I filtered everything in my head like I was reading it. “Kat walked into the classroom and hung up her coat.” ---
**Author:** ![Mongo\_Ponton](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/eb9ed0/32.png) [@Mongo\_Ponton](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mongo_Ponton)\ **Post date:** [February 26, 2008, 10:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-internal-monologue-do-you-refer-to-yourself-in-the-1st-person-or-second-person/439019/33 "2008-02-26T22:48:15Z")
I usually refuse to acknowledge I even know who I am. Keeps the inner dialogue short and allows one to just go right to chastising in fourth person. Aloud. In a crowd. ---
**Author:** ![Sitnam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/6a8cbe/32.png) [@Sitnam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sitnam)\ **Post date:** [February 26, 2008, 11:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-internal-monologue-do-you-refer-to-yourself-in-the-1st-person-or-second-person/439019/34 "2008-02-26T23:21:20Z")
[QUOTE=The Blue-Sighted Shadow] It depends. When I’m being self-critical, it’s almost always second person. Otherwise, first person. [/QUOTE] Agreed. “Damn it! Would you do your freakin’ laundry already!” ---
**Author:** ![Least\_Original\_User\_Name\_Ever](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/e480ec/32.png) [@Least\_Original\_User\_Name\_Ever](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Least_Original_User_Name_Ever)\ **Post date:** [February 26, 2008, 11:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-internal-monologue-do-you-refer-to-yourself-in-the-1st-person-or-second-person/439019/35 "2008-02-26T23:47:24Z")
[QUOTE=eleanorigby] Both. And sometimes I even go regal on my own ass and refer to myself as “we”. [/QUOTE] This is me as well. I’m apparently a slut in this regard and intersperse my internal monologues with 1st, 2nd, or 3rd. Also, I use “retard” or “dumbass” or “idiot”. ---
**Author:** ![OtakuLoki](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/ac8455/32.png) [@OtakuLoki](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/OtakuLoki)\ **Post date:** [February 27, 2008, 12:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-internal-monologue-do-you-refer-to-yourself-in-the-1st-person-or-second-person/439019/36 "2008-02-27T00:13:34Z")
I’m another vote for the dual voiced internal conversations. Of course, since there’s and an “I” and a “you” it’s not the pathetic monologue that the OP was actually presupposing. ---
**Author:** ![Wheeljack](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/838e76/32.png) [@Wheeljack](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wheeljack)\ **Post date:** [February 27, 2008, 12:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-internal-monologue-do-you-refer-to-yourself-in-the-1st-person-or-second-person/439019/37 "2008-02-27T00:30:51Z")
[QUOTE=jackdavinci] uhh… neither? The only internal dialogue (or should we say monologue!) I have that’s remotely “wordy” is when prepping for a conversation or argument I imagine I’m likely to have later, in which case I imagine myself in my own role speaking as I normally would to another person. In cases where my internal dialogue is just thinking about stuff, there’s no monologue voice over to speak of, it’s just the thing itself. [/QUOTE] Whew. For a minute there I thought I was the only person in the world who doesn’t _have_ an internal monologue. I think in pictures, sounds, smells… but words? What the hell? And in English? I’ve heard the phrase “internal monologue” before but I didn’t think people meant it literally. ---
**Author:** ![Spice\_Weasel](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spice_weasel/32/5435_2.png) [@Spice\_Weasel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spice_Weasel)\ **Post date:** [February 27, 2008, 1:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-internal-monologue-do-you-refer-to-yourself-in-the-1st-person-or-second-person/439019/38 "2008-02-27T13:23:05Z")
I use second person. When I’m really disgusted with myself, I’ll bust out my name. **olives** , you moron, get your ass moving or you’re going to be late for work! Does anyone else hold two sides of a conversation in their head? ''What do you want for dinner?" “Well, I don’t know, I really want chocolate.” ‘‘Are you nuts? Chocolate is bad for you! You need your fiber!’’ etc ---
**Author:** ![furt](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/439d5e/32.png) [@furt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/furt)\ **Post date:** [February 27, 2008, 2:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-internal-monologue-do-you-refer-to-yourself-in-the-1st-person-or-second-person/439019/39 "2008-02-27T14:06:10Z")
“dipshit” ---
**Author:** ![Silver\_Tyger](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/fbc32d/32.png) [@Silver\_Tyger](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Silver_Tyger)\ **Post date:** [February 27, 2008, 5:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-internal-monologue-do-you-refer-to-yourself-in-the-1st-person-or-second-person/439019/40 "2008-02-27T17:39:28Z")
[QUOTE=olivesmarch4th] I use second person. When I’m really disgusted with myself, I’ll bust out my name. **olives** , you moron, get your ass moving or you’re going to be late for work! Does anyone else hold two sides of a conversation in their head? ''What do you want for dinner?" “Well, I don’t know, I really want chocolate.” ‘‘Are you nuts? Chocolate is bad for you! You need your fiber!’’ etc [/QUOTE] Doesn’t everyone do that? I do that… i’m not really insane, i swear… I never use my name on myself, but I do refer to myself as stupid sometimes. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-internal-monologue-do-you-refer-to-yourself-in-the-1st-person-or-second-person/439019.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-internal-monologue-do-you-refer-to-yourself-in-the-1st-person-or-second-person/439019.md?page=3)