# Your Kids Can't Have Toys...? (mild) **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [August 22, 2003, 2:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-kids-cant-have-toys-mild/196925 "2003-08-22T14:36:23Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![7\_up\_yours](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/7/919ad9/32.png) [@7\_up\_yours](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/7_up_yours)\ **Post date:** [August 22, 2003, 8:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-kids-cant-have-toys-mild/196925/41 "2003-08-22T20:21:46Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by autz \* > \*\*I don’t see the problem with selling it. > > If I had a $100 credit to ‘Ferret World’ and I don’t have any use for it and will never use it, but I know my neighbor has several ferrets and would love to have it, why not exchange money for the credit? I get the cash to use for something I think is more useful/fun/interesting. And the neighbor gets $100 worth of ferret supplies for $90. \*\* I agree. If it’s no use, then why not get some money for it? But what sounds weird to me is that the kid was trying to sell it instead of the mother. What is a kid going to do with $90? ---
**Author:** ![Scuba\_Ben](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/278dde/32.png) [@Scuba\_Ben](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scuba_Ben)\ **Post date:** [August 22, 2003, 8:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-kids-cant-have-toys-mild/196925/42 "2003-08-22T20:24:00Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by sperfur \* > \*\*Isn’t there some kind of religion that doesn’t allow their children to have toys, observe halloween, stuff like that? Jehovah’s Witness, maybe? \*\* ISTR that the Puritan sect (Plymouth Rock, _Mayflower_, etc.) was strongly opposed to most forms of having a good time. ---
**Author:** ![drpepper](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/8baadc/32.png) [@drpepper](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/drpepper)\ **Post date:** [August 22, 2003, 9:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-kids-cant-have-toys-mild/196925/43 "2003-08-22T21:14:21Z")
I too don’t see a real issue here. If the parents don’t want the kids to have a bunch of crap, and no tv, who cares? Isn’t that the parents’ perogative? It’s not like they have **no** toys; baseball equipment, etc. _are_ toys, or at least they count as constructive entertainment. It’s not as if these kids are kept in a sensory-deprivation dungeon. Like **Ferret Herder** I do find the financial transaction business vaguely odd. And **Autz** , bravo to you. I agree one hundred percent with your philosophy. ---
**Author:** ![FisherQueen](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/58f4c7/32.png) [@FisherQueen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FisherQueen)\ **Post date:** [August 22, 2003, 9:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-kids-cant-have-toys-mild/196925/44 "2003-08-22T21:25:29Z")
Kids are like cats- they can make a toy out of just about anything. It’s certainly not a midwestern practice, but I wouldn’t call this neglect. It probably is very good for these kids’ creative development to have a few simple things to play with. ---
**Author:** ![Nametag](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/nametag/32/406_2.png) [@Nametag](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nametag)\ **Post date:** [August 22, 2003, 10:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-kids-cant-have-toys-mild/196925/45 "2003-08-22T22:55:17Z")
Ohmigod! How terrible! There are parents who insist that their children go outside and exercise, that they not waste their childhood inside growing fat, pasty, and stupid, that they be thrifty, – oh, the humanity! She watches them? How evil! What if they want to break bones, get hit by cars, commit vandalism? How can a kid have such fun with Mom watching? Worst of all, after all that, she insists on trusting the children to handle money! How dare she?! Call Child Protective Services and get them into a proper foster home with Nintendo, HBO, and popcorn – STAT! ---
**Author:** ![CanvasShoes](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/74df32/32.png) [@CanvasShoes](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CanvasShoes)\ **Post date:** [August 23, 2003, 1:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-kids-cant-have-toys-mild/196925/46 "2003-08-23T01:08:46Z")
LOL a teensy bit harsh there **Namtag** even if I agree with your post. I got the impression that the OP was not so much criticizing her, but curious as it was something unheard of to him. AFAIK, it’s unheard of for the last couple of decades when raising kids. The materialism just gets more and more ridiculous. Not to sound “why when I was your age, we walked to school, uphill, BOTH ways,” but we had very few toys. Though we did have Barbie Dolls and doll babies (we each got a new one, first baby dolls, and then barbies as we got older, each year at Christmas), and wouldn’t you know it??? Hell, _I_ have body image problems:D!!! Anyway, I digress. We also had a pony, chickens, a garden, and a HUGE plot of land on which to play. My dad, during lean times would buy old cars and fix them up to sell. There were always at least 3 or 4 beaters sitting at the far end of the propery in various stages of repair. My cousins and I would play cops and robbers, or gangsters vs. gangsters, or even “house” (family going to the grocery store). We’d torture the cranky old rooster (and “save” the nice young rooster from his cruelty). We’d gather eggs, and yes, I know how to trick a hen out of her eggs and how to hypnotize one. We rarely had any toys other than books, a few balls the yearly barbie dolls, and a few small “gadgety” toys, like a little mechanical hen that laid gumballs. Oh and my little sister was nuts about horses, so there were some plastic horse statuettes too. My parents just simply couldn’t afford anything fancier. But I had the coolest Barbie clothes on the block. My grandmothers both sewed, and made all kinds of Barbie and Ken clothing. My dad handmade THE neatest closet for all my barbie clothes. It knocked spots off of the plastic “Barbie house” that was available at the time. But mostly, in spite of the toys we did have, we played outside and just used our imagination to have fun. I’m with some of the other posters though regarding the kid trying to sell the gift certs is a little odd. How old is the kid trying to do this? ---
**Author:** ![Danalan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/76d3ee/32.png) [@Danalan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Danalan)\ **Post date:** [August 23, 2003, 1:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-kids-cant-have-toys-mild/196925/47 "2003-08-23T01:43:44Z")
I’ll probably get flamed for this, but here’s what I thought when I heard this story: Home-schooled = Fundamentalist Christian \> No Toys that weren’t around in the '50’s :: because :: Those toys take one’s mind from constant thoughts of Jesus. I know it’s not right to leap to these assumptions, but that’s the way I see it. Besides, we’re already in the Pit, right? The kids were probably looking to get cash for themselves – mom likely has them on not only an allowance, but is on guard for what they can buy. I suspect the money from working just ends up back in their church, or (shudder) is given to GW for his re-election. As far as those trading/gaming cards, I bet mommy doesn’t know about them. I wonder what other devilment her little darlings are into? Sometimes I think I should be more charitible in my opinions of Fundamentalists. Then I run into one IRL, and renew my rancor all over again. ---
**Author:** ![Capcha](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/82dd89/32.png) [@Capcha](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Capcha)\ **Post date:** [August 23, 2003, 2:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-kids-cant-have-toys-mild/196925/48 "2003-08-23T02:05:32Z")
i remember as a kid, for arts class, we made a house out of cardboard. (carton…or whatever they are called) It was a flat ‘t’ shaped thing. Then we would stick it together to make a house (without ceilling) you know what? i made it as my barbiedoll house, and made anything else from whatever material i could find (bed, shower curtains, tables, etc) ( i also had self-image issues lol) the only toys i had was that, and then just hand-me-downs of stuffed animal toys. i agree with letting the kids have only very few toys. They’ll find things and use their imaginations to have fun. ---
**Author:** ![Danalan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/76d3ee/32.png) [@Danalan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Danalan)\ **Post date:** [August 23, 2003, 2:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-kids-cant-have-toys-mild/196925/49 "2003-08-23T02:20:57Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by 5U1C1D3 \* > \*\*i remember as a kid, for arts class, we made a house out of cardboard. (carton…or whatever they are called) > It was a flat ‘t’ shaped thing. Then we would stick it together to make a house (without ceilling) > > you know what? i made it as my barbiedoll house, and made anything else from whatever material i could find (bed, shower curtains, tables, etc) ( i also had self-image issues lol) > > the only toys i had was that, and then just hand-me-downs of stuffed animal toys. > i agree with letting the kids have only very few toys. They’ll find things and use their imaginations to have fun. \*\* So, if some beloved aunt or wealthy friend had given you a beautiful, new dollhouse, furnished, with lovely dolls, worth $100, and your parents made you take it to the store and give it back, possibly receiving nothing in return, that you’d be OK with that? This isn’t about just ‘limiting’ the toy selection for the kids, this is about systematically depriving them to mold character or something. I say it’s sick and twisted. ---
**Author:** ![sperfur](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a9adbd/32.png) [@sperfur](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/sperfur)\ **Post date:** [August 23, 2003, 4:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-kids-cant-have-toys-mild/196925/50 "2003-08-23T04:25:27Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Deadly Nightlight \* > \*\*As a child of Witnesses, I can assure you that we got to have toys. \*\* Sorry, **Deadly Nightlight** - I was guessing. I’ve read somewhere about a religion that fits the description, but I can’t remember which one it is. ---
**Author:** ![Blonde](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/3be4f8/32.png) [@Blonde](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Blonde)\ **Post date:** [August 23, 2003, 4:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-kids-cant-have-toys-mild/196925/51 "2003-08-23T04:49:28Z")
I was raised in a fundamentalist religion than banned TV (and just about everything thing else) - but I had toys. Toys are good! My son’s 8th birthday is tomorrow and we’re talking toys toys toys!! Also, I put up 3 Christmas trees each year, since those were also banned in my youth. So there. ---
**Author:** ![Scarlett67](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/scarlett67/32/7387_2.png) [@Scarlett67](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scarlett67)\ **Post date:** [August 23, 2003, 1:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-kids-cant-have-toys-mild/196925/52 "2003-08-23T13:05:15Z")
Random thoughts: Amish children have toys, too, and some of them are quite clever. My niece’s grandparents (not my folks, the other ones) buy her electronic toys almost exclusively: plastic things with TV characters on them that you push a button and the lights and music go off. Yuck. My parents and I are apparently the only ones who get her books, Legos, etc. My husband literally had almost no toys when he was a kid, because his family was VERY poor. We joke that he had only sticks and rocks to play with, and that’s not far off. One Christmas when money was very tight (his older sister had just gotten married), he got some socks and some candy. No birthday parties, except maybe his mom made a cake for the family (he doesn’t remember if there were candles). As an adult he is a toy FREAK. (An example, he has at least half a dozen toy robots from the old “Lost in Space” TV show – “Danger, Will Robinson!” – keychain-size, remote control, etc.) And I don’t begrudge him that one bit. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![CanvasShoes](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/74df32/32.png) [@CanvasShoes](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CanvasShoes)\ **Post date:** [August 23, 2003, 9:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-kids-cant-have-toys-mild/196925/53 "2003-08-23T21:14:05Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Danalan \* > \*\*Sometimes I think I should be more charitible in my opinions of Fundamentalists. Then I run into one IRL, and renew my rancor all over again. \*\* Sorry to sound so stupid, but what’s a “Fundamentalist”. I’ve heard that word quite a bit, but I always thought it referred to churches such as the one I grew up in. That of “Free Will Baptist”. But we weren’t raised anything like what you described as “fundie”. The main reason we didn’t have a lot of toys was funding, not fundying!! LOL. Anyway, I know this isn’t GQ, but I’d be curious as to know what a “Fundamentalist” is supposed to be. ---
**Author:** ![CanvasShoes](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/74df32/32.png) [@CanvasShoes](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CanvasShoes)\ **Post date:** [August 23, 2003, 9:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-kids-cant-have-toys-mild/196925/54 "2003-08-23T21:20:15Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Danalan \* > \*\*So, if some beloved aunt or wealthy friend had given you a beautiful, new dollhouse, furnished, with lovely dolls, worth $100, and your parents made you take it to the store and give it back, possibly receiving nothing in return, that you’d be OK with that? > > This isn’t about just ‘limiting’ the toy selection for the kids, this is about systematically depriving them to mold character or something. I say it’s sick and twisted. \*\* Hmmmmmm, I can sort of see your point. But as someone else has said, we don’t really know what sorts of toys the kids are being made to take back. They could be electronic toys of the “does everything for the kid” type. They could be “weapon type” toys. We don’t know. I don’t think it’s really “sick and twisted” though. Strict, and perhaps overly “structured” and even unnecessary. But sick? Hmmmmmmm. not sure I really agree with that. ---
**Author:** ![Krisfer\_the\_Cat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/5f9b8f/32.png) [@Krisfer\_the\_Cat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Krisfer_the_Cat)\ **Post date:** [August 23, 2003, 9:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-kids-cant-have-toys-mild/196925/55 "2003-08-23T21:57:35Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Calliope \* > \*\*and not crappy electronic toys that leave nothing to the imagination. I happen to share his view–. \*\* Okay I am late on the bandwagon but here goes… 1. my son’s coordination has IMPROVED tremendously after playing game boy… 2. He creates his own games, writes his own screenplays, and designs his own games and characters despite having a Playstation and a Game Boy 3. he had no interest in learning to read until we started buying him computer games. He had to learn to read the instructions consequently he reads a grade level above his peer group… BTW he is 7 ---
**Author:** ![doreen](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/858c86/32.png) [@doreen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/doreen)\ **Post date:** [August 23, 2003, 9:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-kids-cant-have-toys-mild/196925/56 "2003-08-23T21:59:42Z")
> [@](#): > > originally posted by CanvasShoes > Hmmmmmm, I can sort of see your point. But as someone else has said, we don’t really know what sorts of toys the kids are being made to take back. No, we don’t. But there is a middle ground between allowing your kids to have any toy someone chooses to give them and returning the toy and allowing the child to sell the credit at a 10% discount (and who knows what happens with the money). That would be returning the unacceptable toy and getting acceptable items with the credit. And since I know Toys-R-Us’s selection - everything from the electronic toys that light up to models, board games ,child size tools , science kits , arts and crafts, sports equipmrnt, videos and books- I think it’s pretty safe to assume that the reason is not that the kid received an unacceptable toy and it was impossible to exchange it for something acceptable. Unless almost nothing is acceptable. Although I have to bring up something I don’t think anyone else has mentioned- the money could be going into a bank account for the kid. My sister does this with any cash gifts her kids receive. ---
**Author:** ![CanvasShoes](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/74df32/32.png) [@CanvasShoes](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CanvasShoes)\ **Post date:** [August 23, 2003, 11:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-kids-cant-have-toys-mild/196925/57 "2003-08-23T23:07:35Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by doreen \* > \*\*No, we don’t. But there is a middle ground between allowing your kids to have any toy someone chooses to give them and returning the toy and allowing the child to sell the credit at a 10% discount (and who knows what happens with the money). That would be returning the unacceptable toy and getting acceptable items with the credit. Actually I didn’t mean to sound as if I were disagreeing with you. I too think it’s a smidge odd that the kids are selling these credits. I didn’t mean to sound condescending with the “we” I meant “we” as in we in this thread. 😃 I kind of meant the post in an “I wonder what else is going on” way. ---
**Author:** ![Daisy\_Mae](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/46a35a/32.png) [@Daisy\_Mae](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Daisy_Mae)\ **Post date:** [August 23, 2003, 11:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-kids-cant-have-toys-mild/196925/58 "2003-08-23T23:24:54Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by 7 up yours \* > \*\*I agree. If it’s no use, then why not get some money for it? > > But what sounds weird to me is that the kid was trying to sell it instead of the mother. What is a kid going to do with $90? \*\* Agreed. The MOTHER should be doing the selling, she’s making her child sound like someone trying to sell food stamps to people in a grocery store parking lot. “Look, I’ve got $200 worth a of food stamps, I’ll sell them for $100.” Mrs QM stated she’d purchased these before from the child to help him out but it’d only been around $20. Seems this is a regular thing they’ve got going. QM, have you checked your kids’ toys to make sure they’re not taking YOUR kids toys back and then trying to sell you the store credit? ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [August 24, 2003, 4:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-kids-cant-have-toys-mild/196925/59 "2003-08-24T04:52:12Z")
Could the kid have told your wife that his mother doesn’t let him have toys-maybe he’s lying? This just sounds really weird. (BTW, I had loads of toys-and I was an EXTREMELY creative child. I played outside, I made up games, etc. So, the idea that more toys destroys your imagination is false). ---
**Author:** ![Q.N.Jones](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/q/3da27b/32.png) [@Q.N.Jones](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Q.N.Jones)\ **Post date:** [August 24, 2003, 8:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-kids-cant-have-toys-mild/196925/60 "2003-08-24T08:00:07Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by quietman1920 \* > **And secondly, can someone please de-bunk this theory that this is a Mid-Western Mindset that no one who wasn’t born there can possibly understand?** Consider it debunked. Our family’s spent time living in Minnesota, Iowa, Indiana, and Illinois, and the vast majority of kids have toys. That said, there are a lot of fundamentalists in the Midwest, and some of them might have a thing about toys. But that would make it a fundamentalist thing, not a Midwestern thing. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-kids-cant-have-toys-mild/196925.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-kids-cant-have-toys-mild/196925.md?page=4)