# Your most shameful culinary practices **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Tags:** food-cooking\ **Created:** [March 23, 2021, 3:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-most-shameful-culinary-practices/938498 "2021-03-23T15:42:29Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 14
**Author:** ![terentii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/terentii/32/212_2.png) [@terentii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/terentii)\ **Post date:** [March 28, 2021, 12:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-most-shameful-culinary-practices/938498/262 "2021-03-28T12:15:22Z")
I was told that my paternal grandparents (immigrants from Austria-Hungary) raised chickens in their backyard in Milwaukee. My grandfather was reputedly fond of sauteeing chicken heads, cracking the skulls open, and sucking the brains out. ---
**Author:** ![Qadgop\_the\_Mercotan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/qadgop_the_mercotan/32/83_2.png) [@Qadgop\_the\_Mercotan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Qadgop_the_Mercotan)\ **Post date:** [March 28, 2021, 1:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-most-shameful-culinary-practices/938498/263 "2021-03-28T13:30:36Z")
Are we cousins? My maternal grandfather’s parents came from Austria-Hungary in 1900 (they were Donau-Schwaben, or german speakers from what’s now Croatia) and settled in Milwaukee, and ate some really frightening stuff! ---
**Author:** ![terentii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/terentii/32/212_2.png) [@terentii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/terentii)\ **Post date:** [March 28, 2021, 1:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-most-shameful-culinary-practices/938498/264 "2021-03-28T13:35:23Z")
Dunno if we’re cousins (my grandparents were from Szeged and Budapest), but I’m willing to bet the two families knew each other in Milwaukee. ---
**Author:** ![Jackmannii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jackmannii/32/311_2.png) [@Jackmannii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jackmannii)\ **Post date:** [March 28, 2021, 2:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-most-shameful-culinary-practices/938498/265 "2021-03-28T14:13:39Z")
The claim that margarine is “just one molecule different from plastic” is bullshit. “This is absurd and was obviously made up by someone with no understanding of chemistry. It doesn’t even make sense. Margarine contains several different molecules. Plastics are polymers and completely unrelated to anything in margarine. Paint doesn’t contain any of the ingredients in margarine. I can’t even imagine where this claim came from unless perhaps some ignoramus confused the quality of plasticity with the molecular composition of plastics.” “If they were thinking of atoms rather than molecules, that’s even worse. Water (H2O) and hydrogen peroxide (H2O2) only differ by one atom, but drinking water is necessary for life while [drinking hydrogen peroxide is a very bad idea](https://sciencebasedmedicine.org/dont-drink-hair-bleach/). The properties of molecules have little to do with their chemical composition.” > **[Fake News About Margarine](https://sciencebasedmedicine.org/fake-news-about-margarine/)** > > An alarmist email is circulating with misinformation about margarine. A little fact-checking shows that both margarine and butter can be part of a healthy diet. Similar bogus claims have been made about other foods, including Velveeta and Cool Whip. A previous poster confessed to drinking the slimy fluid in gefilte fish bottles, which to me sounds less bad than actually eating the gefilte fish, which to me resembles a substance pooped out by an anemic person after eating fish. I (gasp) cut up spaghetti into lengths manageable on a fork, in accord with the Calvin Trillin principle that anything that inhibits or slows down glomming onto food (i.e. having to twirl long strands of pasta around a fork or onto a spoon, like crazy people do) is wrong, even if it is viewed as “correct spaghetti etiquette”. ---
**Author:** ![QuickSilver](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/quicksilver/32/7832_2.png) [@QuickSilver](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/QuickSilver)\ **Post date:** [March 28, 2021, 2:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-most-shameful-culinary-practices/938498/266 "2021-03-28T14:28:05Z")
> [@Jackmannii](#): > > A previous poster confessed to drinking the slimy fluid in gefilte fish bottles, which to me sounds less bad than actually eating the gefilte fish, which to me resembles a substance pooped out by an anemic person after eating fish. Happy Passover, everybody! ---
**Author:** ![abcdefghij](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/43a26b/32.png) [@abcdefghij](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/abcdefghij)\ **Post date:** [March 28, 2021, 2:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-most-shameful-culinary-practices/938498/267 "2021-03-28T14:29:31Z")
> [@Jackmannii](#): > > I (gasp) cut up spaghetti into lengths manageable on a fork, in accord with the Calvin Trillin principle that anything that inhibits or slows down glomming onto food (i.e. having to twirl long strands of pasta around a fork or onto a spoon, like crazy people do) is wrong, even if it is viewed as “correct spaghetti etiquette”. My family visited Italy when I was a teenager. We had been arguing for weeks about the “proper” way to eat long pasta. Twirl against a spoon? Twirl against the plate? Cut it into bite-sized pieces? We went out for lunch in Venice and a group of very well-dressed Italian businessmen came in and all ordered pasta. My mother told us all to pay attention, because we were finally going to see the right way to do it. When their pasta arrived, every one them picked up a fork in each hand and started shoveling pasta into their mouths as fast as they could go. We practically got thrown out of the place, we were laughing so hard. ---
**Author:** ![QuickSilver](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/quicksilver/32/7832_2.png) [@QuickSilver](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/QuickSilver)\ **Post date:** [March 28, 2021, 2:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-most-shameful-culinary-practices/938498/268 "2021-03-28T14:37:36Z")
> [@abcdefghij](#): > > When their pasta arrived, every one them picked up a fork in each hand and started shoveling pasta into their mouths as fast as they could go. Did you mean a fork and spoon, or two forks? How does that even work? ---
**Author:** ![abcdefghij](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/43a26b/32.png) [@abcdefghij](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/abcdefghij)\ **Post date:** [March 28, 2021, 2:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-most-shameful-culinary-practices/938498/269 "2021-03-28T14:38:40Z")
Two forks. Picture a steam shovel. ---
**Author:** ![abcdefghij](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/43a26b/32.png) [@abcdefghij](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/abcdefghij)\ **Post date:** [March 28, 2021, 2:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-most-shameful-culinary-practices/938498/270 "2021-03-28T14:44:14Z")
FWIW, this predated the Tampopo spaghetti scene by several years. [![](https://img.youtube.com/vi/sNAZmLmyCJk/hqdefault.jpg "TAMPOPO eat spaghetti noiselessly+subtitles") ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sNAZmLmyCJk) ---
**Author:** ![Dewey\_Finn](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dewey_finn/32/4222_2.png) [@Dewey\_Finn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dewey_Finn)\ **Post date:** [March 28, 2021, 3:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-most-shameful-culinary-practices/938498/271 "2021-03-28T15:03:06Z")
What did they do with their napkins? I avoid dishes like spaghetti when dressed up because of the possibility of splatter. So wearing across your chest like an apron seems like the most practical but I was taught to put it in my lap. ---
**Author:** ![abcdefghij](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/43a26b/32.png) [@abcdefghij](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/abcdefghij)\ **Post date:** [March 28, 2021, 3:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-most-shameful-culinary-practices/938498/272 "2021-03-28T15:11:18Z")
I honestly don’t remember, but probably tucked into the collar. I think they had abandoned any pretense of dignity. ---
**Author:** ![terentii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/terentii/32/212_2.png) [@terentii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/terentii)\ **Post date:** [March 28, 2021, 3:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-most-shameful-culinary-practices/938498/273 "2021-03-28T15:25:50Z")
I wish I could find a decent clip of George eating spaghetti on _ **Seinfeld** _. It’s like watching a combination steam shovel and vacuum cleaner suck it all up. ---
**Author:** ![panache45](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/panache45/32/64_2.png) [@panache45](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/panache45)\ **Post date:** [March 28, 2021, 5:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-most-shameful-culinary-practices/938498/274 "2021-03-28T17:59:58Z")
> [@dwyr](#): > > I used to eat onion sandwiches. My father used to eat green onions, dipped into salt after each bite. Or a hard-boiled egg broken up in a saucer of water, with salt. ---
**Author:** ![puzzlegal](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/puzzlegal/32/3827_2.png) [@puzzlegal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/puzzlegal)\ **Post date:** [March 28, 2021, 6:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-most-shameful-culinary-practices/938498/275 "2021-03-28T18:21:23Z")
On passover i eat a hard boiled egg, dipping most of the bites into the ramekin of salt water i used to dip my parsley. And i skip the gefilte fish course. Happy passover, everyone. ---
**Author:** ![dwyr](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dwyr/32/363_2.png) [@dwyr](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dwyr)\ **Post date:** [March 28, 2021, 10:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-most-shameful-culinary-practices/938498/276 "2021-03-28T22:37:13Z")
Oh, whenever my mother had a relish plate along with dinner there would always be green onions and salt. I never thought that was weird. ---
**Author:** ![nightshadea](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/7ba0ec/32.png) [@nightshadea](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/nightshadea)\ **Post date:** [March 29, 2021, 10:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-most-shameful-culinary-practices/938498/277 "2021-03-29T10:27:28Z")
there are relatives of mine that will pull out stalk onions, celery tomatoes straight out of the garden … brush/blow off the dirt, and eat them ---
**Author:** ![Broomstick](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/broomstick/32/246_2.png) [@Broomstick](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Broomstick)\ **Post date:** [March 29, 2021, 11:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-most-shameful-culinary-practices/938498/278 "2021-03-29T11:09:15Z")
> [@QuickSilver](#): > > Happy Passover, everybody! As I was eating cheese on matzoh for breakfast (it’s basically cheese and crackers) I thought to myself “hey, a couple strips of bacon would be really nice…” I felt like such a naughty little girl. ---
**Author:** ![puzzlegal](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/puzzlegal/32/3827_2.png) [@puzzlegal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/puzzlegal)\ **Post date:** [March 29, 2021, 11:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-most-shameful-culinary-practices/938498/279 "2021-03-29T11:54:38Z")
> [@nightshadea](#): > > there are relatives of mine that will pull out stalk onions, celery tomatoes straight out of the garden … brush/blow off the dirt, and eat them I see nothing shameful about that. Asparagus, in particular, is best immediately after being picked. ---
**Author:** ![rackensack](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/e5b9ba/32.png) [@rackensack](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/rackensack)\ **Post date:** [March 30, 2021, 5:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-most-shameful-culinary-practices/938498/280 "2021-03-30T05:06:42Z")
Made matzoh brei for my wife Sunday morning, but today when I got up I decided that the last couple of pieces of bacon I cooked last week needed to end up in the omelet I was making myself for breakfast. I’m good with having converted, and in a lot of ways I’m more Jewish than my wife (my Yiddish is better, and having had to learn stuff as an adult I retain a lot more of it), but having grown up in the rural Arkansas delta, I’m not keeping kosher until there’s provision made for catfish, BBQ pork, and bacon. ---
**Author:** ![salinqmind1](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/958977/32.png) [@salinqmind1](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/salinqmind1)\ **Post date:** [March 30, 2021, 3:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-most-shameful-culinary-practices/938498/281 "2021-03-30T15:28:20Z")
I’ve seen nori seaweed ‘cones’ in a package in the ‘foreign foods’ sections of grocery stores, including Walmart. Like little bitty ice cream cones. There of suggestions for various fillings, mostly rice and something, one could make a passable ‘sushi cone’. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-most-shameful-culinary-practices/938498.md?page=13) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-most-shameful-culinary-practices/938498.md?page=15)