# Your most worthless Christmas gift (this year.)

**URL:** <https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-most-worthless-christmas-gift-this-year/522700>\
**Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\
**Created:** [December 27, 2009, 12:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-most-worthless-christmas-gift-this-year/522700 "2009-12-27T12:56:08Z")\
**Posts on this page:** 20\
**Page:** 1

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**Author:** ![Khadaji](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/9e8a1a/32.png) [@Khadaji](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Khadaji)\
**Post date:** [December 27, 2009, 12:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-most-worthless-christmas-gift-this-year/522700/1 "2009-12-27T12:56:08Z")

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OK, yeah, I know, it is the thought that counts and all that, but… sometimes you gotta ask: _what were you thinking?_

I got a five dollar gift certificate to _Long John Silvers._

Now, even if I knew where there was an LJS locally, and even if I weren’t a 48 year old man who makes enough money to eat at nice restaurants and even if I ate fast food regularly, and even if 5 dollars were enough to make a good meal, I still think I’d be going WTF? What on earth made you think _It is Christmas, I’ll get Khadaji a gift certificate to Long John Silvers._

What did you get that made you all 😕

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**Author:** ![FairyChatMom](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fairychatmom/32/21906_2.png) [@FairyChatMom](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FairyChatMom)\
**Post date:** [December 27, 2009, 1:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-most-worthless-christmas-gift-this-year/522700/2 "2009-12-27T13:09:11Z")

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Placemats. Made from legal-sized paper with computer-printed clipart. Laminated. 24 of them (two for each month.)

First off, even with the laminate border, an 8 1/2 wide sheet of paper is smaller than any dinner plate I’ve ever seen. Secondly, there are 4 in this household - I guess 2 of them don’t deserve placemats. Third, they look like something your 8 year old would make in art class, but these were made by a 50+ adult, who bragged to me about giving them as wedding presents, too.

I am a crafter - I understand the time and effort that goes into making gifts, but this one is a new level of odd. I have no idea what I’m going to do with them. Maybe I can turn them upside down and put them under plants? Thankfully, I live pretty far from the giver.

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**Author:** ![Antigen](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/848f3c/32.png) [@Antigen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Antigen)\
**Post date:** [December 27, 2009, 4:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-most-worthless-christmas-gift-this-year/522700/3 "2009-12-27T16:45:16Z")

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A plaque for the wall with my and my fiance’s names on it, along with a long description of what our names mean, and what our personalities are, based on our names. And the background is a photo of two kittens sharing a sundae.

I can’t even claim to have dropped it and broken it because it’s one of those things where the image is stuck to a block of wood instead of being framed.

At this point, I am _terrified_ about what sort of stuff people will come up with for wedding presents!

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**Author:** ![Harmonious\_Discord](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/74df32/32.png) [@Harmonious\_Discord](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Harmonious_Discord)\
**Post date:** [December 27, 2009, 5:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-most-worthless-christmas-gift-this-year/522700/4 "2009-12-27T17:24:26Z")

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> [@FairyChatMom](#):
>
> Placemats. Made from legal-sized paper with computer-printed clipart. Laminated. 24 of them (two for each month.)
> 
> First off, even with the laminate border, an 8 1/2 wide sheet of paper is smaller than any dinner plate I’ve ever seen. Secondly, there are 4 in this household - I guess 2 of them don’t deserve placemats. Third, they look like something your 8 year old would make in art class, but these were made by a 50+ adult, who bragged to me about giving them as wedding presents, too.
> 
> I am a crafter - I understand the time and effort that goes into making gifts, but this one is a new level of odd. I have no idea what I’m going to do with them. Maybe I can turn them upside down and put them under plants? Thankfully, I live pretty far from the giver.

Add a lace border and give them back next year.

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**Author:** ![FairyChatMom](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fairychatmom/32/21906_2.png) [@FairyChatMom](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FairyChatMom)\
**Post date:** [December 27, 2009, 5:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-most-worthless-christmas-gift-this-year/522700/5 "2009-12-27T17:42:02Z")

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Not lace - doilies!!! :eek:

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**Author:** ![salinqmind](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/3ec8ea/32.png) [@salinqmind](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/salinqmind)\
**Post date:** [December 27, 2009, 5:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-most-worthless-christmas-gift-this-year/522700/6 "2009-12-27T17:51:50Z")

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A Snuggie. As sure as it snows in the northeast in the winter, I KNEW there was going to be a Snuggie under the tree with my name on it. I appreciate the time, money, and effort the giftgiver spent to procure me a Snuggie. But: it’s lame (like a Pet Rock). I’m always always always hot (yes, it’s me who keeps turning the thermostat down). I have a way to take the chill off, if I need it - the giftgiver has seen my beautiful velour throw, and was there when I bought my beautiful cashmere throw (for 70% off). So why does the giftgiver think I need a cheap, stupid fleece gag gift? (I smiled and said thank you so much, but maybe I can fold it into a nice cat bed, or regift to someone who could uses it.)

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**Author:** ![Hanna](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/b3f665/32.png) [@Hanna](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hanna)\
**Post date:** [December 27, 2009, 5:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-most-worthless-christmas-gift-this-year/522700/7 "2009-12-27T17:55:31Z")

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> [@Antigen](#):
>
> A plaque for the wall with my and my fiance’s names on it, along with a long description of what our names mean, and what our personalities are, based on our names. \*\*And the background is a photo of two kittens sharing a sundae.  
> \*\*  
> I can’t even claim to have dropped it and broken it because it’s one of those things where the image is stuck to a block of wood instead of being framed.
> 
> At this point, I am _terrified_ about what sort of stuff people will come up with for wedding presents!

Holy smokes. I love cats and I can’t even imagine something like that.

The sad part is, the person who gave it to you probably prides themselves on always giving the perfect, thoughtful gift.

Your fiance wasn’t the one who gave you that gift, right?

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**Author:** ![salinqmind](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/3ec8ea/32.png) [@salinqmind](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/salinqmind)\
**Post date:** [December 27, 2009, 5:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-most-worthless-christmas-gift-this-year/522700/8 "2009-12-27T17:58:01Z")

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> [@Antigen](#):
>
> A plaque for the wall with my and my fiance’s names on it, along with a long description of what our names mean, and what our personalities are, based on our names. And the background is a photo of two kittens sharing a sundae.
> 
> I can’t even claim to have dropped it and broken it because it’s one of those things where the image is stuck to a block of wood instead of being framed.
> 
> At this point, I am _terrified_ about what sort of stuff people will come up with for wedding presents!

😛 This sounds like a Harriet Carter catalog special! I have a friend who buys similar stuff for me, usually dopey looking signs you hang on the wall with generic platitudes about friendship, dealing with life, or the cleanliness of my kitchen.

Now I’m really dying to hear what they give you for a wedding present - be sure to let us know in the future! (a dotty old lady at work gave ME plastic (!) salt and pepper shakers, with salt still in one of them - she got them at a yard sale and thought they were rare antiques. :rolleyes:)

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**Author:** ![billfish678](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/7bcc69/32.png) [@billfish678](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/billfish678)\
**Post date:** [December 27, 2009, 6:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-most-worthless-christmas-gift-this-year/522700/9 "2009-12-27T18:12:38Z")

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> [@salinqmind](#):
>
> A Snuggie. As sure as it snows in the northeast in the winter, I KNEW there was going to be a Snuggie under the tree with my name on it.

We got one those each…and we live in the deep south. But, at least its better than the other crap listed here and so far the pets love em 🙂

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**Author:** ![kapri](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/4491bb/32.png) [@kapri](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kapri)\
**Post date:** [December 27, 2009, 6:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-most-worthless-christmas-gift-this-year/522700/10 "2009-12-27T18:15:37Z")

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> [@Antigen](#):
>
> A plaque for the wall with my and my fiance’s names on it, along with a long description of what our names mean, and what our personalities are, based on our names. And the background is a photo of two kittens sharing a sundae.
> 
> I can’t even claim to have dropped it and broken it because it’s one of those things where the image is stuck to a block of wood instead of being framed.
> 
> At this point, I am _terrified_ about what sort of stuff people will come up with for wedding presents!

That just might be the funniest gift I’ve ever heard of. It was bad enough, and then I got to the part about kittens sharing a sundae–wow.

I didn’t get a bad one this year, unless you count bubble bath, because I almost exclusively take showers, but my grandmother used to give us outrageous gifts–shirts with cigarette burns on the sleeves, bright green scuffed purses–stuff like that.

You just have to laugh.

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**Author:** ![Larry\_Mudd](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/f14d63/32.png) [@Larry\_Mudd](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Larry_Mudd)\
**Post date:** [December 27, 2009, 6:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-most-worthless-christmas-gift-this-year/522700/11 "2009-12-27T18:20:32Z")

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My mom’s gift to me this year was a Reader’s Digest Condensed Book including a condensed version of Randy Pausch’s _The Last Lecture_.

Who knew they even made those anymore? Beyond that, I have repeatedly told my mother that I am familiar with it, saw it on YouTube before Oprah got wind of it, not interested in looking at it again. I have been very vocal about how offensive I find the entire concept of condensed books, ever since I was a kid.

Just another beat on the “I’m going to die” drum that my mother has been beating regularly for (holy christ, has it really been?) 30 years, and which has dominated all communication with her for the last ten. Awesome.

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**Author:** ![runcible\_spoon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/9fc29f/32.png) [@runcible\_spoon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/runcible_spoon)\
**Post date:** [December 27, 2009, 6:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-most-worthless-christmas-gift-this-year/522700/12 "2009-12-27T18:44:19Z")

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I’d have a hard choice between a scented candle-inna-jar, and a bar of massage soap. I am A) a guy, and B) under 30. What the hell, aunt? I even had an extensive list of things I wanted to be picked off of, that all my other relatives seem to have read. Of course, she did also give me a bag of mason jars, so we’re cool.

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**Author:** ![Markxxx](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/5daacb/32.png) [@Markxxx](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Markxxx)\
**Post date:** [December 27, 2009, 6:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-most-worthless-christmas-gift-this-year/522700/13 "2009-12-27T18:58:04Z")

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I wonder how many of these gifts were cast offs or recycled gifts? Hmmmm…

As for the Snugie, I get the point that poster is making, but in the givers defence, a lot of people buy nice stuff and then won’t use it. I love cashmere, but I am also the type to spill stuff, so if I bought a cashmere throw, I might not use it if I wanted to get warm AND eat Cheetos, 'cause you just know you’d get the Orange Cheese all over the cashmere, but this way you can get the Snugie as dirty as you like and who cares?

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**Author:** ![Mrs.Cake](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/2acd7d/32.png) [@Mrs.Cake](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mrs.Cake)\
**Post date:** [December 27, 2009, 7:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-most-worthless-christmas-gift-this-year/522700/14 "2009-12-27T19:13:15Z")

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Not much odd or useless this year, surprisingly. I did get a small gift bag of Halloween candy from a co-worker. None of it chocolate either.

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**Author:** ![billfish678](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/7bcc69/32.png) [@billfish678](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/billfish678)\
**Post date:** [December 27, 2009, 7:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-most-worthless-christmas-gift-this-year/522700/15 "2009-12-27T19:23:56Z")

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> [@Markxxx](#):
>
> but this way you can get the Snugie as dirty as you like and who cares?

Well, that explains why our snuggies are dark brown 🙂

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**Author:** ![Drain\_Bead](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e47774/32.png) [@Drain\_Bead](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Drain_Bead)\
**Post date:** [December 27, 2009, 8:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-most-worthless-christmas-gift-this-year/522700/16 "2009-12-27T20:33:41Z")

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A travel bottle warmer. First off, we already have one. Second, the baby is 11 months old, and already transitioning to sippy cups.

Luckily, my MIL doesn’t get offended when I tell her that we probably won’t use something–she’d rather take something back than buy something we don’t need.

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**Author:** ![FairyChatMom](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fairychatmom/32/21906_2.png) [@FairyChatMom](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FairyChatMom)\
**Post date:** [December 27, 2009, 8:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-most-worthless-christmas-gift-this-year/522700/17 "2009-12-27T20:54:30Z")

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We bought a Snuggie as a gag gift for our family goofy exchange. My daughter and son in law were given Snuggies as a serious gift. In Pink and Blue. To their credit, they didn’t bust out laughing when they got them.

I swore if I ended up with the Snuggie in the exchange, it was going to be turned into dust rags…

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**Author:** ![Cazzle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cazzle/32/75_2.png) [@Cazzle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cazzle)\
**Post date:** [December 27, 2009, 9:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-most-worthless-christmas-gift-this-year/522700/18 "2009-12-27T21:22:11Z")

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My mum bought me sexy lingerie. Yeah. I know.

Not only that, but it was lingerie a size too big for me, in a style that would only suit a girl much skinnier than me.

So that was my most worthless gift not just because it doesn’t fit or doesn’t suit, but because it was also disturbing. I do not need my mother to buy sexy lingerie for me!

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**Author:** ![kopek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kopek/32/337_2.png) [@kopek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kopek)\
**Post date:** [December 27, 2009, 9:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-most-worthless-christmas-gift-this-year/522700/19 "2009-12-27T21:25:01Z")

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a 5 pound nut assortment from my brother. Either he forgot I have divisticulosis or he remembered and is trying to kill me. Either way I’ll just take them to work and set them out at lunch for the vultures.

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**Author:** ![Surly\_Chick](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ec9cab/32.png) [@Surly\_Chick](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Surly_Chick)\
**Post date:** [December 27, 2009, 9:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-most-worthless-christmas-gift-this-year/522700/20 "2009-12-27T21:28:58Z")

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I got an electric wine opener. I haven’t even opened the box yet so I’m not sure how it works. Or why one would even need an electric wine opener. Even if one drank tons of wine. Which I don’t.

I also got a Snuggie, in pink. I think it’s going to more useful than my electric wine opener…

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