# Your nomination for the Sappiest Song Ever. **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [November 17, 2008, 8:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-nomination-for-the-sappiest-song-ever/473168 "2008-11-17T20:22:18Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Biggirl](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/biggirl/32/3294_2.png) [@Biggirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Biggirl)\ **Post date:** [November 17, 2008, 8:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-nomination-for-the-sappiest-song-ever/473168/1 "2008-11-17T20:22:18Z")
Seasons in the Sun has worn out it’s crown. If I hear it come on the oldies station I no longer run screaming and tearing my hair out to change the station. I may even sing a little of it. Now we need a new king of smaltz. It can’t just have insipid music, it also has to have insipid words. My two nominations: Don’t Cry Daddy by Elvis Presley. Patches by Clarence Carter. Go ahead, try to beat those. ---
**Author:** ![minlokwat](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/minlokwat/32/2844_2.png) [@minlokwat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/minlokwat)\ **Post date:** [November 17, 2008, 8:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-nomination-for-the-sappiest-song-ever/473168/2 "2008-11-17T20:32:25Z")
With the holiday season (almost) upon us, I submit **Christmas Shoes** as a paradigm of schmaltzy drek. ---
**Author:** ![twickster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ec9cab/32.png) [@twickster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/twickster)\ **Post date:** [November 17, 2008, 8:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-nomination-for-the-sappiest-song-ever/473168/3 "2008-11-17T20:32:43Z")
Yooooooooouuuuuuuuu Light up my Liiiiiiiiiiiiiifffffe ---
**Author:** ![ComeToTheDarkSideWeHaveCookies](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/e9bcb4/32.png) [@ComeToTheDarkSideWeHaveCookies](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ComeToTheDarkSideWeHaveCookies)\ **Post date:** [November 17, 2008, 8:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-nomination-for-the-sappiest-song-ever/473168/4 "2008-11-17T20:35:55Z")
Air Supply, Lost in Love. ---
**Author:** ![Yllaria](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/yllaria/32/3452_2.png) [@Yllaria](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Yllaria)\ **Post date:** [November 17, 2008, 8:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-nomination-for-the-sappiest-song-ever/473168/5 "2008-11-17T20:36:22Z")
Honey "See the three, how big it’s grown. … " or Never Been to Me I could probably look up who sang them (or even if I got the titles right), but it has been mercifully erased from my memory and I don’t want to endanger that small bit of solace. ---
**Author:** ![John\_DiFool](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/john_difool/32/19543_2.png) [@John\_DiFool](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/John_DiFool)\ **Post date:** [November 17, 2008, 8:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-nomination-for-the-sappiest-song-ever/473168/6 "2008-11-17T20:46:42Z")
“Total Eclipse of the [del]Brain[/del] Heart” I would truly feel sorry for any poor sap who dated such a woman, and wouldn’t blame him a bit for dumping her. ---
**Author:** ![Duke](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e8c25b/32.png) [@Duke](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Duke)\ **Post date:** [November 17, 2008, 8:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-nomination-for-the-sappiest-song-ever/473168/7 "2008-11-17T20:55:20Z")
That “Dear Mr. Jesus” song from a while back has to be a contender. I’m not going to provide a YouTube link to the video, it’s awful. AWFUL. ---
**Author:** ![Ellen\_Cherry](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ellen_cherry/32/3600_2.png) [@Ellen\_Cherry](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ellen_Cherry)\ **Post date:** [November 17, 2008, 8:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-nomination-for-the-sappiest-song-ever/473168/8 "2008-11-17T20:55:35Z")
From the Seasons in the Sun Era, how about Run, Joey Run: > [@](#): > > Suddenly, a shot rang out, and I saw Julie falling > I ran to her, I held her close, when I looked down, my hands were red, > and here’s the last words Julie said… > > Daddy please don’t, it wasn’t his fault, he means so much to me > Daddy please don’t, we’re gonna get married…just you wait and see. Pukie! ---
**Author:** ![chacoguy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/50afbb/32.png) [@chacoguy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/chacoguy)\ **Post date:** [November 17, 2008, 8:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-nomination-for-the-sappiest-song-ever/473168/9 "2008-11-17T20:56:25Z")
“Puppy Love” by Donny Osmond. End of Story. Kids these days…\ :rolleyes: ---
**Author:** ![Qadgop\_the\_Mercotan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/qadgop_the_mercotan/32/83_2.png) [@Qadgop\_the\_Mercotan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Qadgop_the_Mercotan)\ **Post date:** [November 17, 2008, 8:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-nomination-for-the-sappiest-song-ever/473168/10 "2008-11-17T20:59:04Z")
Maybe it’s not number 1, but it’s a contender, just likey “Honey”, or “Watching Scotty grow”. It’s called **Sometimes When We Touch** , by Dan Hill > [@](#): > > You ask me if I love you > And I choke on my reply > I’d rather hurt you honestly > Than mislead you with a lie > And who am I to judge you > On what you say or do? > I’m only just beginning to see the real you > > Chorus: > And sometimes when we touch > The honesty’s too much > And I have to close my eyes and hide > I wanna hold you til I die > Til we both break down and cry > I wanna hold you till the fear in me subsides It gets a _lot_ worse : [Domain parked by OnlyDomains](http://www.romantic-lyrics.com/ls64.shtml) And the music? \<\\> [sub]I kinda liked “Patches”[/sub] ---
**Author:** ![Khadaji](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/9e8a1a/32.png) [@Khadaji](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Khadaji)\ **Post date:** [November 17, 2008, 8:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-nomination-for-the-sappiest-song-ever/473168/11 "2008-11-17T20:59:06Z")
[Daddy Don’t you walk so fast](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=c8KQ6TLsQDA) ---
**Author:** ![BubbaDog](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bubbadog/32/333_2.png) [@BubbaDog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BubbaDog)\ **Post date:** [November 17, 2008, 9:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-nomination-for-the-sappiest-song-ever/473168/12 "2008-11-17T21:00:19Z")
Some song about a little kid who talked to truckers on the CB - I can’t think of the name of it ---
**Author:** ![control-z](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/eada6e/32.png) [@control-z](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/control-z)\ **Post date:** [November 17, 2008, 9:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-nomination-for-the-sappiest-song-ever/473168/13 "2008-11-17T21:04:07Z")
> [@BubbaDog](#): > > Some song about a little kid who talked to truckers on the CB - I can’t think of the name of it Is it “[Teddy](http://www.mp3lyrics.org/r/red-sovine/teddy/)” by Red Sovine? ---
**Author:** ![WhyNot](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/c77e96/32.png) [@WhyNot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WhyNot)\ **Post date:** [November 17, 2008, 9:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-nomination-for-the-sappiest-song-ever/473168/14 "2008-11-17T21:09:44Z")
What was that horrid one…“Butterfly Kisses” or something? I have a little girl myself and that song makes me gag. ---
**Author:** ![SaharaTea](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e9a140/32.png) [@SaharaTea](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SaharaTea)\ **Post date:** [November 17, 2008, 9:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-nomination-for-the-sappiest-song-ever/473168/15 "2008-11-17T21:12:16Z")
“Butterfly Kisses.” BLECH ---
**Author:** ![Rube\_E.Tewesday](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/f0a364/32.png) [@Rube\_E.Tewesday](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rube_E.Tewesday)\ **Post date:** [November 17, 2008, 9:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-nomination-for-the-sappiest-song-ever/473168/16 "2008-11-17T21:13:07Z")
> [@control-z](#): > > Is it “[Teddy](http://www.mp3lyrics.org/r/red-sovine/teddy/)” by Red Sovine? There was actually a sequel to that song, by another singer, about the little boy’s death. “Teddy Bear’s Last Ride”. That would be my nominee for this “honour”. ---
**Author:** ![Superfluous\_Parentheses](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/8edcca/32.png) [@Superfluous\_Parentheses](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Superfluous_Parentheses)\ **Post date:** [November 17, 2008, 9:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-nomination-for-the-sappiest-song-ever/473168/17 "2008-11-17T21:14:40Z")
Patches is a good choice. [Please don’t go topless, mother](http://www.boingboing.net/2005/05/04/please-dont-go-tople.html) (link to mp3 in the article) and more seriously: [Memory](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4-L6rEm0rnY). ---
**Author:** ![Hazle\_Weatherfield](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/e9bcb4/32.png) [@Hazle\_Weatherfield](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hazle_Weatherfield)\ **Post date:** [November 17, 2008, 9:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-nomination-for-the-sappiest-song-ever/473168/18 "2008-11-17T21:50:19Z")
> [@minlokwat](#): > > With the holiday season (almost) upon us, I submit **Christmas Shoes** as a paradigm of schmaltzy drek. Holy Shit…beaten by the second post. WINNER! ---
**Author:** ![Annie-Xmas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ecc23a/32.png) [@Annie-Xmas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Annie-Xmas)\ **Post date:** [November 17, 2008, 10:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-nomination-for-the-sappiest-song-ever/473168/19 "2008-11-17T22:00:00Z")
George Jones’s [He Stopped Loving Her Today](http://www.cowboylyrics.com/lyrics/jones-george/he-stopped-loving-her-today-18102.html) ---
**Author:** ![Quasimodem](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/q/e274bd/32.png) [@Quasimodem](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Quasimodem)\ **Post date:** [November 17, 2008, 10:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-nomination-for-the-sappiest-song-ever/473168/20 "2008-11-17T22:02:49Z")
**Billy, Don’t Be A Hero** - Bo Donaldson and The Heywoods Q [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-nomination-for-the-sappiest-song-ever/473168.md?page=2)