# Your nomination for the Sappiest Song Ever. **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [November 17, 2008, 8:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-nomination-for-the-sappiest-song-ever/473168 "2008-11-17T20:22:18Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![Biggirl](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/biggirl/32/3294_2.png) [@Biggirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Biggirl)\ **Post date:** [November 18, 2008, 3:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-nomination-for-the-sappiest-song-ever/473168/41 "2008-11-18T03:07:16Z")
> [@eleanorigby](#): > > “Mandy” is another contender, but the OP asked for more current stuff. I thought Mandy WAS about a dog! It doesn’t _have_ to be current. And cutting out the '70s would disallow some real, um, jewels. ---
**Author:** ![freckafree](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/freckafree/32/3050_2.png) [@freckafree](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/freckafree)\ **Post date:** [November 18, 2008, 3:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-nomination-for-the-sappiest-song-ever/473168/42 "2008-11-18T03:22:35Z")
Forty-one posts and no John Denver?!?? “Sunshine on My Shoulders”? “Annie’s Song”? “Grandma’s Feather Bed”? (OK, this may be more hokey than sappy.) ---
**Author:** ![Jragon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/e19b73/32.png) [@Jragon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jragon)\ **Post date:** [November 18, 2008, 3:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-nomination-for-the-sappiest-song-ever/473168/43 "2008-11-18T03:34:23Z")
> [@John\_DiFool](#): > > “Total Eclipse of the [del]Brain[/del] Heart” > > I would truly feel sorry for any poor sap who dated such a woman, and wouldn’t blame him a bit for dumping her. It takes on a COMPLETELY different angle in your mind after you see the [video](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=840B27zYfOk). I think the studio and Tyler had a TOTALLY different picture of the lyrics, especially “turn around bright eyes.” Everyone with a functioning mind interpreted that as lubby-dubby… the studio… well, I think the meeting went something like: “What has eyes that are bright?” “Ghosts of (or possibly possessed) choir children in ill fitting white robes, obviously! _ **DUH!** _” (And make sure you watch all of it, it just gets terrifying at sections) My nominations: Hey There Delilah - Plain White T’s Here Without You - 3 Doors Down I actually like both of these songs but they’re still incredibly sappy. ---
**Author:** ![appleciders](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/85f322/32.png) [@appleciders](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/appleciders)\ **Post date:** [November 18, 2008, 3:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-nomination-for-the-sappiest-song-ever/473168/44 "2008-11-18T03:43:58Z")
> [@Jragon](#): > > Hey There Delilah - Plain White T’s > > I actually like both of these songs but they’re still incredibly sappy. Watch the music video- this is not just a love song, it’s a song about how he’s gonna lose this girl. Gave me a whole different take on it. “Never Let You Go” by Tal Bachman is pretty sappy. **The Nitty Gritty Dirt Band** do some seriously sappy songs sometimes- “Nickel in the Well”, “Fire in the Sky”, “If This Ain’t Love”, “Down The Road”. ---
**Author:** ![thirdwarning](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ecccb3/32.png) [@thirdwarning](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/thirdwarning)\ **Post date:** [November 18, 2008, 3:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-nomination-for-the-sappiest-song-ever/473168/45 "2008-11-18T03:53:47Z")
> [@Qadgop\_the\_Mercotan](#): > > It’s called **Sometimes When We Touch** , by Dan Hill > > It gets a _lot_ worse : [Domain parked by OnlyDomains](http://www.romantic-lyrics.com/ls64.shtml) > And the music? \<\\> But it’s so much fun to sing along when you’re alone, especially in the car. It just dries out for over-emoting. ---
**Author:** ![Jragon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/e19b73/32.png) [@Jragon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jragon)\ **Post date:** [November 18, 2008, 4:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-nomination-for-the-sappiest-song-ever/473168/46 "2008-11-18T04:09:24Z")
> [@appleciders](#): > > Watch the music video- this is not just a love song, it’s a song about how he’s gonna lose this girl. Gave me a whole different take on it. I know that, I think we just have different definitions of sappy. ---
**Author:** ![kaylasdad99](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kaylasdad99/32/3398_2.png) [@kaylasdad99](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kaylasdad99)\ **Post date:** [November 18, 2008, 4:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-nomination-for-the-sappiest-song-ever/473168/47 "2008-11-18T04:37:34Z")
I don’t see _Feelings_, as presented by the redoubtable Morris Albert, up there… ---
**Author:** ![caligulathegod](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/caligulathegod/32/9685_2.png) [@caligulathegod](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/caligulathegod)\ **Post date:** [November 18, 2008, 5:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-nomination-for-the-sappiest-song-ever/473168/48 "2008-11-18T05:01:44Z")
[Li’l Markie: Diary of an Unborn Child.](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KfxFbWo_DH4) [/thread] It takes three whole minutes to get to the singing part, but when you do it is the most demented sappy song ever. ---
**Author:** ![installLSC](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/54ee81/32.png) [@installLSC](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/installLSC)\ **Post date:** [November 18, 2008, 5:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-nomination-for-the-sappiest-song-ever/473168/49 "2008-11-18T05:41:01Z")
Two country nominees: Modern–“Moments” by Emerson Drive. Guy finds homeless man about to jump off a bridge. He tries to talk the man down. While talking, the jumpee reveals how he helped so many others as a younger man. All wedded to the stickly synth strings and pointless key change all bad modern country ballads have. Older–“No Charge” by Melba Montgomery. Kid gives mom a bill for all the chores he does. Mom points out all the things (the pain of giving birth, paying for college, etc.) she does for him for no charge. At the end of the song, he writes “no charge” on his bill. Even worse string arrangement. Oddly enough written by Harlan Howard, who wrote classics like “I Fall to Pieces”. ---
**Author:** ![kitemaker\_chuck](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/a88e4f/32.png) [@kitemaker\_chuck](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kitemaker_chuck)\ **Post date:** [November 18, 2008, 6:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-nomination-for-the-sappiest-song-ever/473168/50 "2008-11-18T06:03:10Z")
We had joy, we had fun We had seasonis in the sun… I think it was “sung” by Terry Jacks ---
**Author:** ![Quasimodem](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/q/e274bd/32.png) [@Quasimodem](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Quasimodem)\ **Post date:** [November 18, 2008, 6:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-nomination-for-the-sappiest-song-ever/473168/51 "2008-11-18T06:09:49Z")
> [@kitemaker\_chuck](#): > > We had joy, we had fun > We had seasonis in the sun… > > I think it was “sung” by Terry Jacks Rod McKuen figures into that some way, but I’ll be damned if i can remember how… Q ---
**Author:** ![Cyberhwk](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/7993a0/32.png) [@Cyberhwk](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cyberhwk)\ **Post date:** [November 18, 2008, 10:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-nomination-for-the-sappiest-song-ever/473168/52 "2008-11-18T10:32:57Z")
> [@kitemaker\_chuck](#): > > We had joy, we had fun > We had seasonis in the sun… > > I think it was “sung” by Terry Jacks I believe this also inspired an Ode to the SDMB back in the day. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Sophistry\_and\_Illusion](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/b3f665/32.png) [@Sophistry\_and\_Illusion](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sophistry_and_Illusion)\ **Post date:** [November 18, 2008, 10:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-nomination-for-the-sappiest-song-ever/473168/53 "2008-11-18T10:53:15Z")
> [@Annie-Xmas](#): > > George Jones’s [He Stopped Loving Her Today](http://www.cowboylyrics.com/lyrics/jones-george/he-stopped-loving-her-today-18102.html) Hey, now, don’t be dissin’ Ol’ Possum. ---
**Author:** ![Cazzle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cazzle/32/75_2.png) [@Cazzle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cazzle)\ **Post date:** [November 18, 2008, 11:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-nomination-for-the-sappiest-song-ever/473168/54 "2008-11-18T11:45:45Z")
I’d like to thank my parent’s record collection for inspiration [**The Last Farewell** - Roger Whittaker](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WsbvE-Ezwg0) [**I’m Not Lisa** - Jessi Colter](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WsbvE-Ezwg0) [**Rocky** - Austin Roberts](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TVB7caV7GoM&feature=related) [**Adrian** - Jewel](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PSVIH5icBFs), the most self-indulgent track I’ve ever come across on any album. ---
**Author:** ![lobotomyboy63](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lobotomyboy63/32/2900_2.png) [@lobotomyboy63](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lobotomyboy63)\ **Post date:** [November 18, 2008, 12:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-nomination-for-the-sappiest-song-ever/473168/55 "2008-11-18T12:01:03Z")
So many turds…so little time. I agree with most of the above and won’t shame myself by disagreeing with a few. “Cat’s in the Cradle” has never done it for me, nor has “Taxi.” Let’s not omit “Blind Man in the Bleachers.” That stupid “Playground in my mind,” i.e. “My name is Michael, I got a nickel…” “Born Free,” with it’s memorable “Stay free…,” guaranteed to elicit feminine hygiene product associations. “Afternoon Delight,” now that’s not really a turd—it’s more like projectile diarrhea, a fountain o’shit. \ ETA @Cazzle: Rocky and I’m not Lisa? NO, STOP! ROGER WHITTAKER? ROGER WHITTAKER? SOMEBODY CALL 9-1-1! \ ---
**Author:** ![Carm6773](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/2bfe46/32.png) [@Carm6773](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Carm6773)\ **Post date:** [November 18, 2008, 12:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-nomination-for-the-sappiest-song-ever/473168/56 "2008-11-18T12:19:18Z")
> [@installLSC](#): > > Two country nominees: > Modern–“Moments” by Emerson Drive. Guy finds homeless man about to jump off a bridge. He tries to talk the man down. While talking, the jumpee reveals how he helped so many others as a younger man. All wedded to the stickly synth strings and pointless key change all bad modern country ballads have. > Older–“No Charge” by Melba Montgomery. Kid gives mom a bill for all the chores he does. Mom points out all the things (the pain of giving birth, paying for college, etc.) she does for him for no charge. At the end of the song, he writes “no charge” on his bill. Even worse string arrangement. Oddly enough written by Harlan Howard, who wrote classics like “I Fall to Pieces”. Don’t forget these: [Love, Me by Collin Ray](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ND7Q6DOdsAY) [Holes in the Floor of Heaven by Steve Wariner](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dJUOFeE_Ouc&feature=related) and [How Can I Help You to Say Goodbye by Patti Loveless](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qCmlZv7dh3s) ---
**Author:** ![Annie-Xmas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ecc23a/32.png) [@Annie-Xmas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Annie-Xmas)\ **Post date:** [November 18, 2008, 1:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-nomination-for-the-sappiest-song-ever/473168/57 "2008-11-18T13:25:10Z")
> [@Quasimodem](#): > > Rod McKuen figures into that some way, but I’ll be damned if i can remember how… > > Q He provided the English lyrics. This was originally a French song, done by the brillant Jacque Brel. McKuen and Jacks just ruined it. ---
**Author:** ![eleanorigby](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/ee7513/32.png) [@eleanorigby](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/eleanorigby)\ **Post date:** [November 18, 2008, 1:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-nomination-for-the-sappiest-song-ever/473168/58 "2008-11-18T13:54:27Z")
What about Johnny Cash’s “Give My Love to Rose”? It’s pretty damned treacly. Homeless guy, just out of prison or some such–hero come across him as he lays dying in the street. “give all my money to Rose. Tell my son to help his mother around the house. Tell Rose to buy some pretty clothes.” etc. yuck. Whatever that song is by Elton John and Kiki Dee–I can’t stand it. Doubt it’s sappy, but I just hate it. No, I don’t want to know the title because then it will become an earworm. ---
**Author:** ![gigi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/a587f6/32.png) [@gigi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gigi)\ **Post date:** [November 18, 2008, 1:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-nomination-for-the-sappiest-song-ever/473168/59 "2008-11-18T13:59:22Z")
> [@dawson](#): > > Wouldn’t that make **you** her Dad, which would make you deceased, wouldn’t it 😕 phil’s a chick, I think. Sappy in a good way-- \*\*One Boy, One Girl \*\*by Collin Raye. Makes me tear up every time. ---
**Author:** ![Snickers](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/5daacb/32.png) [@Snickers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Snickers)\ **Post date:** [November 18, 2008, 2:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-nomination-for-the-sappiest-song-ever/473168/60 "2008-11-18T14:01:08Z")
**lobotomyboy** ’s right. “Aaaa aaaa aaaaafternoon delight” wins. Ick. Now I need brain bleach. What’s that one that was remade recently, by U2 I think? Car crash, girl dies, and now he’ll miss her forever and will let us know about it endlessly? Not Earth Angel, but something like it. That was full of yuck too. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-nomination-for-the-sappiest-song-ever/473168.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-nomination-for-the-sappiest-song-ever/473168.md?page=4)