# Your not getting into hell till you finish your still twitching baby arms. **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [September 26, 2003, 1:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-not-getting-into-hell-till-you-finish-your-still-twitching-baby-arms/203971 "2003-09-26T13:58:08Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Bryan\_Ekers](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bryan_ekers/32/183_2.png) [@Bryan\_Ekers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bryan_Ekers)\ **Post date:** [September 27, 2003, 3:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-not-getting-into-hell-till-you-finish-your-still-twitching-baby-arms/203971/21 "2003-09-27T15:47:48Z")
The other day, I opened a thread… _…and I never went back to it!_ I deserve such a spanking. ---
**Author:** ![11811](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/1/9d8465/32.png) [@11811](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/11811)\ **Post date:** [September 27, 2003, 4:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-not-getting-into-hell-till-you-finish-your-still-twitching-baby-arms/203971/22 "2003-09-27T16:01:20Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by smam \* > **Next time you come in here and presume to tell me an exciting hedonistic story about partaking of a meal you had better of eaten a baby’s arm or something.** Sorry for the gratuituous _Tubes_ reference, but ideally, it should be “a baby’s arm holding an apple.” 🙂 Carry on ---
**Author:** ![astro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/9dc877/32.png) [@astro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/astro)\ **Post date:** [September 27, 2003, 4:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-not-getting-into-hell-till-you-finish-your-still-twitching-baby-arms/203971/23 "2003-09-27T16:13:50Z")
If this little rant was fried in lard, wrapped in cheese and stuffed with goose and veal pate, powdered with sugar, dipped in chocolate and smothered in raspeberry sauce it might have something going for it, but as is umm… _meh_. ---
**Author:** ![istara](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/e79b87/32.png) [@istara](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/istara)\ **Post date:** [September 27, 2003, 5:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-not-getting-into-hell-till-you-finish-your-still-twitching-baby-arms/203971/24 "2003-09-27T17:47:44Z")
Nah - what pisses me off is the people who go on and on and on and on and on about how much they drank last nigth and their fucking hangovers, and endlessly list every single drink they had the previous night (though how the fuck they can remember beats me). It is NOT interesting what you had to drink. Every single combination of alcoholic excess has been done before. It is ONLY interesting if the drink was a new alien vodka from Mars, containing fluorescent spaceworms, that glows in the dark and makes your piss turn to strawberry juice. Twenty pints, thirty G&Ts, a bottle of Baileys, three hundred bacardi and cokes - all this has been done before. Please don’t tell me. Please don’t list it all. Please don’t even bother to tell me how drunk you got and how hungover you are, because (a) I can see it and (b) I can smell it. ---
**Author:** ![Mearl\_Dox](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/65b543/32.png) [@Mearl\_Dox](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mearl_Dox)\ **Post date:** [September 27, 2003, 7:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-not-getting-into-hell-till-you-finish-your-still-twitching-baby-arms/203971/25 "2003-09-27T19:24:04Z")
I have a friend like this. He’s convinced he’s a tough scary guy. The problem is, he’s just overweight enough to look cuddly, and he dresses like a boy band member. And he has beautiful, beautiful woman hair. And he’s a computer geek. So overall, possibly the most nonthreatening guy I know. But _he’s_ sure he’s a macho man, livin’ on the edge… Sometimes it’s funny, and sometimes it’s just really annoying. ---
**Author:** ![matt\_mcl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/7ab992/32.png) [@matt\_mcl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/matt_mcl)\ **Post date:** [September 27, 2003, 11:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-not-getting-into-hell-till-you-finish-your-still-twitching-baby-arms/203971/26 "2003-09-27T23:53:02Z")
Jeez, I’m in the exact opposite situation, **Mearl Dox**! I’m a sweet, unassuming lil femme boi. I’m a New Democrat for godsakes, nobody’s scared of us. But I’ve been mistaken for a frickn _biker_ before, because [sub]get this[/sub] I was wearing a _vest_! Okay, carry on. ---
**Author:** ![Hilarity\_N.Suze](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/hilarity_n.suze/32/6223_2.png) [@Hilarity\_N.Suze](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hilarity_N.Suze)\ **Post date:** [September 28, 2003, 7:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-not-getting-into-hell-till-you-finish-your-still-twitching-baby-arms/203971/27 "2003-09-28T07:10:05Z")
. . . so this coworker comes up to me and says, “I like your fuck-me shoes.” _What!?_ Black pumps with 2-inch heel. No slingback, no cutout, no open toe. Not even toe cleavage. No bells, whistles, buckles, or bows. They aren’t even patent leather. Even if shoes could be evil, which I don’t believe, these aren’t. My response (not given aloud): “Nice clodhoppers.” (Also black, some kind of Kenneth Cole clog, IMO much sexier than mine on account of open heel. But I feel some better putdown is required. I’ll have to think about this. Probably for days.) ---
**Author:** ![PhiloVance](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/e19adc/32.png) [@PhiloVance](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PhiloVance)\ **Post date:** [September 28, 2003, 7:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-not-getting-into-hell-till-you-finish-your-still-twitching-baby-arms/203971/28 "2003-09-28T07:18:53Z")
color me laughing my ass off. :rolleyes: ---
**Author:** ![Desmostylus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/c57346/32.png) [@Desmostylus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Desmostylus)\ **Post date:** [September 28, 2003, 7:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-not-getting-into-hell-till-you-finish-your-still-twitching-baby-arms/203971/29 "2003-09-28T07:44:56Z")
Sounds like you’re hangin out with Rick from _The Young Ones_. > [@](#): > > RICK: We never clean the toilet, Neil. That’s what being a student is all about! No way, Harpic! No way, Dot! All that Blue Loo scene is for squares. One thing’s for sure, Neil. When Cliff Richard wrote “Wired for Sound”, no way was he sitting on a clean lavatory. He was living on the limit, just like me. Where the only place to put bleach is in your hair! > [@](#): > > RICK: Hey, wouldn’t it be a-mazing if all of this money was real? > > VYVYAN: That is the single most predictable and boring thing that anybody could ever say while playing Monopoly. > [@](#): > > RICK: But that makes me a criminal! [thinks about it] Right on! Yeah, this will shake them up at the Anarchists Society! Occupying the refectories! So what? This is the real stuff! I’m a fugitive! A desperado! I’m going to form a new union society, right? With me a president! ‘People Who Don’t Pay Their TV Licenses Against the Nazis!’ [takes out pad and pen and starts writing] This is only the beginning! > [@](#): > > VYVYAN: Shut up, you girl. > > RICK: Ha ha ha. He’s incredible. I’m not a girl at all! Mind you, we’re all pretty potty in this house. Last night, right, we were all watching the television, and it was a programme we wanted to watch, you know, and then we were just watching it, and right in the middle of it, I just got up and turned it off. Mad! I don’t care what I do, you know. Unless it’s work or something. You know, last Wednesday we stayed up until one o’clock in the morning! > [@](#): > > ANARCHIST: Political activist, eh? Ah, what’s the last thing you blew up? > > RICK: Well, I blew up a rubber johnny actually in the union bar. It was hilarious - everybody thought so. > > [Anarchist puts his arm round Rick’s shoulders] > > ANARCHIST: Yeah. Look, next Tuesday, I’m gonna blow up a Panda in Croydon. > > RICK: Yer, right on. Bloody zoos, who needs them? > > ANARCHIST: No, a police car, you terminal wally! ---
**Author:** ![Derleth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/b9e5f3/32.png) [@Derleth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Derleth)\ **Post date:** [September 28, 2003, 7:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-not-getting-into-hell-till-you-finish-your-still-twitching-baby-arms/203971/30 "2003-09-28T07:45:23Z")
**Cicada2003** : Next time that happens, say “Nice shitkickers” and say it loud. Guaranteed to make the person ignore you the rest of the week. 😃 – **Derleth** , proud wearer of shitkickers. ---
**Author:** ![clayton\_e](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/c57346/32.png) [@clayton\_e](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/clayton_e)\ **Post date:** [September 28, 2003, 5:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-not-getting-into-hell-till-you-finish-your-still-twitching-baby-arms/203971/31 "2003-09-28T17:29:42Z")
Very amusing OP. Very observant, as well. ---
**Author:** ![Bob\_Scene](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/e19adc/32.png) [@Bob\_Scene](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bob_Scene)\ **Post date:** [September 28, 2003, 6:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-not-getting-into-hell-till-you-finish-your-still-twitching-baby-arms/203971/32 "2003-09-28T18:58:26Z")
**Beavis:** These guys are living on the edge! **Butt-head:** Yeah. The edge of Wuss Cliff. ---
**Author:** ![Weirddave](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/919ad9/32.png) [@Weirddave](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Weirddave)\ **Post date:** [September 28, 2003, 7:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-not-getting-into-hell-till-you-finish-your-still-twitching-baby-arms/203971/33 "2003-09-28T19:10:59Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by bloodytoe \* > \*\*They’re to many puppys and kittens anyways. \*\* Too ---
**Author:** ![Ilsa\_Lund](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/a6a055/32.png) [@Ilsa\_Lund](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ilsa_Lund)\ **Post date:** [September 28, 2003, 7:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-not-getting-into-hell-till-you-finish-your-still-twitching-baby-arms/203971/34 "2003-09-28T19:35:48Z")
> [@](#): > > You had a fucking meal, you are not the prince/of fucking darkness. Can I use this as a sig line? ---
**Author:** ![tdn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/94ad74/32.png) [@tdn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tdn)\ **Post date:** [September 28, 2003, 9:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-not-getting-into-hell-till-you-finish-your-still-twitching-baby-arms/203971/35 "2003-09-28T21:22:26Z")
So this guy did this funny thing, and we were laughin’! And I was like “Damn!” When I was in high school, the drill was to get on any one of the mighty fine variety of buses, which would then shuttle us the one block over to the middle school. There, we would then board the proper bus to take us home. I remember one day a couple of real loose cannon girls (Mormons, perhaps?) getting on the “wrong” bus at the HS, and telling the driver “Hey, we know it’s the wrong bus, be we decided What The Hell.” To this she added a devilish grin. Woah, there, you Biker Mormons from Heck, throw caution to the wind much? The better schools might not want to touch you after such a stunt. Funnily enough, I think they did it to impress me with their “danger” side. Flattered though I should have been, it failed to impress me much. Also funny was that the next year, the school prohibited these wild bus-hopping shenanigans. I guess they figured some people could simply not handle the power trip. ---
**Author:** ![smam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/46a35a/32.png) [@smam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/smam)\ **Post date:** [September 29, 2003, 11:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-not-getting-into-hell-till-you-finish-your-still-twitching-baby-arms/203971/36 "2003-09-29T11:11:59Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Ilsa\_Lund \* > \*\*Can I use this as a sig line? \*\* Sure, you can have it. Take a couple for your friends as well. In fact, sigs all around, i’m good for it people. ---
**Author:** ![lilbtagna](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/4491bb/32.png) [@lilbtagna](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lilbtagna)\ **Post date:** [September 29, 2003, 2:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-not-getting-into-hell-till-you-finish-your-still-twitching-baby-arms/203971/37 "2003-09-29T14:55:33Z")
Ugh, I _hate_ hearing about someone’s “wild night filled with drinking and partying,” only to find out later that it was just a bunch of pussy-whipped boyfriends sitting around playing XBOX and drinking a couple beers while their girlfriends are elsewhere. _Then_ I get to see these dumbasses stumble around campus all day, carrying a 32oz. bottle of Gatorade to help with that “massive throbbing pain” in their pea-brained, thick-skulled heads. Get a fucking life, losers! Thanks. I needed that. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Knowed\_Out](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/knowed_out/32/7380_2.png) [@Knowed\_Out](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Knowed_Out)\ **Post date:** [September 29, 2003, 4:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-not-getting-into-hell-till-you-finish-your-still-twitching-baby-arms/203971/38 "2003-09-29T16:25:32Z")
Somehow I picture somebody like Terry Pratchett designing extra hells (a la the Chinese) for those who commit thoroughly unremarkable and inconsequential sins, such as the hell for those who eat an extra slice of New York cheesecake with cherry topping and proclaim how evil they are for doing so. The punishments would be bland and petty, such as having cable TV go out for 30 minutes. Kind of like going to heck and being darned. ---
**Author:** ![stick\_monkey](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/258eb7/32.png) [@stick\_monkey](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/stick_monkey)\ **Post date:** [September 29, 2003, 6:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-not-getting-into-hell-till-you-finish-your-still-twitching-baby-arms/203971/39 "2003-09-29T18:46:03Z")
> [@](#): > > ## quote: > > ## Originally posted by bloodytoe They’re to many puppys and kittens anyways. > > Too And since someone else pulled the grammar nazi card first, while we’re at it. “There are” not They are. **dances the grammar nazi dance** ---
**Author:** ![Swampwolf](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/8edcca/32.png) [@Swampwolf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Swampwolf)\ **Post date:** [September 29, 2003, 9:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-not-getting-into-hell-till-you-finish-your-still-twitching-baby-arms/203971/40 "2003-09-29T21:40:30Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by stick monkey \* > > > [@](#): > > > > Originally posted by bloodytoe > > They’re to many puppys and kittens anyways. > > \*\*And since someone else pulled the grammar nazi card first, while we’re at it. “There are” not They are. > > **dances the grammar nazi dance** \*\* As long as we’re playing… it’s “pupp **ie** s” [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-not-getting-into-hell-till-you-finish-your-still-twitching-baby-arms/203971.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-not-getting-into-hell-till-you-finish-your-still-twitching-baby-arms/203971.md?page=3)