# Your Patron Saint Designation by . . . Swimming Riddles **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [April 27, 2000, 12:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-patron-saint-designation-by-swimming-riddles/16536 "2000-04-27T12:59:00Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 13
**Author:** ![Tripler](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tripler/32/21807_2.png) [@Tripler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tripler)\ **Post date:** [September 29, 2000, 3:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-patron-saint-designation-by-swimming-riddles/16536/241 "2000-09-29T03:03:46Z")
Wow. The Patron Saint of Prodigal Posters: prodigal: (adj). 1: Recklessly extravagant. 2: Charactarised by wasteful expendature:LAVISH 3: Yielding abundantly:LUXURIANT . . . I am honored. I have a sneaky suspicion you know me IRL . . . Tripler ---
**Author:** ![flup](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/d07c76/32.png) [@flup](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/flup)\ **Post date:** [September 29, 2000, 6:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-patron-saint-designation-by-swimming-riddles/16536/242 "2000-09-29T06:27:26Z")
Swiddles I think that’s a sig line. –flup like you never flupped before “At last, someone with REAL creds.” ---
**Author:** ![Dijon\_Warlock](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/a9a28c/32.png) [@Dijon\_Warlock](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dijon_Warlock)\ **Post date:** [September 30, 2000, 8:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-patron-saint-designation-by-swimming-riddles/16536/243 "2000-09-30T08:42:35Z")
> [@](#): > > _Swiddles thundered in righteous wrath:_ > \*\*Ah-huh. You insult me and threaten me in my own thread. And as if that were not bad enough, you then FLIRT in my thread, and proceed to use a pontification that was not provided by myself in your sig, something I believe I clearly asked everyone not to do. > > You are now demoted to the Patron Saint of Demontions.\*\* Insult? Where? Threaten!? Smiting with Care Bears is _threatening_? **BARNEY** is threatening. He would _sing_ at you! Stupid, inane songs with the lyrics badly rewritten so as to render them even more insipid. As for flirting, I flirted with _you_ (admittedly in a typically male-vulgar way, but still–it’s the thought that counts). Also, I was asked not to _misquote_ your pontification; not to turn down others that came by…unless I missed something. Besides, you’re Patron Saint of _Patron_ Saints, not personal ones. Whooooole different ballgame, there. What’s a Demontion? 😃 😃 😃 Shucks, I would _never_ insult you on purpose. I value my life and general well-being. Plus, I’ve seen your pics. Stupid PR move for me, that would be. ::hastily shaving head and donning saffron robes to spend all Eternity as Swiddles’ devoted acolyte:: ---
**Author:** ![magdalene](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/df788c/32.png) [@magdalene](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/magdalene)\ **Post date:** [September 30, 2000, 2:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-patron-saint-designation-by-swimming-riddles/16536/244 "2000-09-30T14:38:37Z")
Swiddles, saint me, saint ME! Please? How many times I gotta watch your back in the Pit? ---
**Author:** ![SwimmingRiddles](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/43a26b/32.png) [@SwimmingRiddles](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SwimmingRiddles)\ **Post date:** [September 30, 2000, 5:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-patron-saint-designation-by-swimming-riddles/16536/245 "2000-09-30T17:01:34Z")
[quote] I’m in. Canonization, and in return I offer a custom made, one-of-a-kind mix tape. You think the Medici family got started like this? \*\* I hope so. And it’s probable, since they didn’t have mix tapes back then. And I WILL take you up on that offer, I believe the first time I noticed your appearance was in the obscure indie rock thread. So a mix tape would be accepted, and your pontification shall be a well-thought out one. (see how it works, people? BRIBE ME!) Email me. Welfy, I’d love to pontificate you, but what will I get out of it? Quid pro quo, my friend. I am now running this thread like the Catholic church. I’m considering offering absolution of sins for a nice price, too. My lawyers are looking into the legality of it. And Maggie does get something for nothing because, more than anyone, she has consistantly given me fantastic advice, and has always backed me in Pitfights. Therefore, Bless us, Saint Magdalene, Patron Saint of Wise, Quality Advice Laden Posters. Also patron saint of that fantastic new-lipstick feeling. ps: anyone who makes a list of all the posters who have gotten canonizations and thier prospective fields of sainthood will get a free canonization. I’m not looking for high price bribes here, but I need something to slow the this thread, without shafting people… ---
**Author:** ![SwimmingRiddles](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/43a26b/32.png) [@SwimmingRiddles](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SwimmingRiddles)\ **Post date:** [September 30, 2000, 5:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-patron-saint-designation-by-swimming-riddles/16536/246 "2000-09-30T17:02:52Z")
> [@](#): > > I’m in. Canonization, and in return I offer a custom made, one-of-a-kind mix tape. > > You think the Medici family got started like this? I hope so. And it’s probable, since they didn’t have mix tapes back then. And I WILL take you up on that offer, I believe the first time I noticed your appearance was in the obscure indie rock thread. So a mix tape would be accepted, and your pontification shall be a well-thought out one. (see how it works, people? BRIBE ME!) Email me. Welfy, I’d love to pontificate you, but what will I get out of it? Quid pro quo, my friend. I am now running this thread like the Catholic church. I’m considering offering absolution of sins for a nice price, too. My lawyers are looking into the legality of it. And Maggie does get something for nothing because, more than anyone, she has consistantly given me fantastic advice, and has always backed me in Pitfights. Therefore, Bless us, Saint Magdalene, Patron Saint of Wise, Quality Advice Laden Posters. Also patron saint of that fantastic new-lipstick feeling. ps: anyone who makes a list of all the posters who have gotten canonizations and thier prospective fields of sainthood will get a free canonization. I’m not looking for high price bribes here, but I need something to slow the this thread, without shafting people… ---
**Author:** ![Medea\_s\_Child](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/8baadc/32.png) [@Medea\_s\_Child](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Medea_s_Child)\ **Post date:** [September 30, 2000, 5:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-patron-saint-designation-by-swimming-riddles/16536/247 "2000-09-30T17:28:16Z")
Do you want that list e-mailed or posted? ---
**Author:** ![SwimmingRiddles](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/43a26b/32.png) [@SwimmingRiddles](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SwimmingRiddles)\ **Post date:** [September 30, 2000, 5:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-patron-saint-designation-by-swimming-riddles/16536/248 "2000-09-30T17:44:29Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Medea’s Child \* > **Do you want that list e-mailed or posted?** Emailed would be fine. Be sure to include some fodder for sainthood, ie: Arkon’s request about the Dark Lords, etc. The power of this all is staggering. I’m gonna go buy me a pointy hat. ---
**Author:** ![Medea\_s\_Child](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/8baadc/32.png) [@Medea\_s\_Child](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Medea_s_Child)\ **Post date:** [September 30, 2000, 5:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-patron-saint-designation-by-swimming-riddles/16536/249 "2000-09-30T17:47:03Z")
I’ll work on it…better than O Chem. ---
**Author:** ![Silo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ac91a4/32.png) [@Silo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Silo)\ **Post date:** [September 30, 2000, 5:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-patron-saint-designation-by-swimming-riddles/16536/250 "2000-09-30T17:51:05Z")
So what’s my Patron Saint designation, Ms. Swiddles? I promise to hold a yearly fiesta in your honor. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![magdalene](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/df788c/32.png) [@magdalene](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/magdalene)\ **Post date:** [September 30, 2000, 5:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-patron-saint-designation-by-swimming-riddles/16536/251 "2000-09-30T17:57:48Z")
Swiddles (sniff) you’re gonna make me cry… ---
**Author:** ![The\_Mermaid](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/a183cd/32.png) [@The\_Mermaid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Mermaid)\ **Post date:** [September 30, 2000, 6:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-patron-saint-designation-by-swimming-riddles/16536/252 "2000-09-30T18:38:18Z")
For me I was going to suggest Patron Saint of Satanic Condiments but I think Dijon Warlock has that one taken. Please do me. I can offer you either catsup or little-known Jim Morrison trivia. Which is it? ---
**Author:** ![Zenster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/cdc98d/32.png) [@Zenster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zenster)\ **Post date:** [September 30, 2000, 8:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-patron-saint-designation-by-swimming-riddles/16536/253 "2000-09-30T20:10:19Z")
Hit me with your best shot **SwimmingRiddles"**. You sound like a very fun person to know. ---
**Author:** ![Skelji](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/b38774/32.png) [@Skelji](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skelji)\ **Post date:** [October 1, 2000, 12:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-patron-saint-designation-by-swimming-riddles/16536/254 "2000-10-01T00:04:19Z")
Oh, hell, I may as well jump in here with everyone else. Lay it on me, Swiddles. I need a sig! ---
**Author:** ![phouka](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/c5a1d2/32.png) [@phouka](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/phouka)\ **Post date:** [October 1, 2000, 12:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-patron-saint-designation-by-swimming-riddles/16536/255 "2000-10-01T00:22:30Z")
Oh, my stars and garters, Swiddles! If I’d have known _this_ would be the result of that momentary lapse in impulse control . . . well, hell, I’d still have done it. That’s only because I love watchng you be so very clever. I grovel in mortification. I bake you brownies and chocolate chip cookies with the really humungous semi-sweet chocolate chips. I wrap you in fuzzy blankets, bring you a mug of hot chocolate with the little marshmallows and real whipped cream. I read outloud to you the first Harry Potter book with all the right voices and accents. Some day, I hope you will forgive me. I know it won’t be anytime soon, but I wait patiently. Hope your toe gets better. ---
**Author:** ![racinchikki](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/eada6e/32.png) [@racinchikki](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/racinchikki)\ **Post date:** [October 1, 2000, 12:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-patron-saint-designation-by-swimming-riddles/16536/256 "2000-10-01T00:25:21Z")
can we have one more jumper-onner-lately of the bandwagon? i can offer chocolate chip cookies, useless racing trivia, and passable country guitar work… ---
**Author:** ![Wonko\_The\_Sane](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/258eb7/32.png) [@Wonko\_The\_Sane](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wonko_The_Sane)\ **Post date:** [October 3, 2000, 12:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-patron-saint-designation-by-swimming-riddles/16536/257 "2000-10-03T00:39:39Z")
Since my new patron-saintosity involves tie-dye, -and- was assigned by the ever-so-nice **Swiddles** , I figure someone is deserving of a custom WTS tiedye. Send me an email with your preferred colors and shirt type/size, and I’ll hook you up with an official Wonko The Sane creation! ---
**Author:** ![Robot\_Arm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/robot_arm/32/18280_2.png) [@Robot\_Arm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Robot_Arm)\ **Post date:** [October 3, 2000, 2:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-patron-saint-designation-by-swimming-riddles/16536/258 "2000-10-03T14:57:37Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by SwimmingRiddles \* > So a mix tape would be accepted, and your pontification shall be a well-thought out one. (see how it works, people? BRIBE ME!) Email me. E-mail sent. Is the address in your profile still correct? ---
**Author:** ![SwimmingRiddles](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/43a26b/32.png) [@SwimmingRiddles](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SwimmingRiddles)\ **Post date:** [October 3, 2000, 6:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-patron-saint-designation-by-swimming-riddles/16536/259 "2000-10-03T18:32:20Z")
Thanks, Robot Arm. Bless us, Robot Arm, Patron Saint of Mix Tapes, obscure indie rock and tweesers. Bless us, Zenster, Patron Saint of recipes, and Fresca. By the by, I’m a vegetarian who is bored of pasta. Any suggestions for a quick, one person meal? And someone has got to take Wonko up on that offer of the shirt. They then have to take a picture in the shirt, and see if techie will put it up on the People Pages. A Wonko Original Design is a rare thing. Phouka, I am actually glad you saw this. To think that you had left the boards and never got to see the fruition of this thread, after all the work I’ve done would have been worse. I forgive you, and not just because I really like hot chocolate. I’d write more, but only Robot and Zenster really bribed me. So. ---
**Author:** ![Silo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ac91a4/32.png) [@Silo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Silo)\ **Post date:** [October 3, 2000, 7:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-patron-saint-designation-by-swimming-riddles/16536/260 "2000-10-03T19:26:39Z")
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