As well as the winning lottery numbers I could allus take with me all the footie results, horse/dog race winners.
Man I could place one hell of an accumulator bet.
Me? greedy? nah!
I’d keep hopping forward, in 50 or 100 year increments until I got to a time where they’ve solved the whole ‘death’ problem. With immortality to work on it, I could eventually catch up with everyone else knowledge wise.
If we manage to trash the joint and go extinct 1st, I’ll just keep hopping until roaches evolve into intelligent beings.
errrr wait a minute. That would be pretty gross, nevermind. Maybe cute fuzzy bunnies will evolve into intelligent beings.
It’s nice to see optimism about the future, but it might actually be the stone age in either direction, as far as humanity is concerned.
Why can’t I just send Fred Phelps back to the stoneage?
Already been there.
I would go back 10 years to when the original me was 40 years old. I’d introduce myself to me as Uncle Poopie. Original me would reply something to the effect, “We’ve been expecting you. As you probably already know, your dad and grandfather live with my parents and I at Poopie Palace & Luxury Spa – come join us.”
Later, I would hop back into the time machine and go back another 20 years, to when the original me was 20. “Hi, I’m your great uncle Poopie.” Reply: “We’ve been expecting you…come join your dad and us at Poopie Mansion.”
Later I’d go back 20 years, to just before original me was born, bearing gifts, stock/lottery/gambling tips and unambiguous evidence of time travel. It would take some effort, but knowing dad as only a son does, I’m positive that I could convince mine that I was indeed an alternate, and much older, version of the son he is about to have (luckily, my dad has an open mind and keen interest in esoteric scientific possibilities). I would go on to explain that I’d like to stick around, make the family rich, keep us out of trouble and help guide the youngest and soon to be born, little Poopie. “Dad, you did a great job raising me, but knowing what I know now, I’m in a position to do an even better job…you and mom just concern yourselves with big bro and sis.” We would concoct a “long lost relative” scenario to convince mom and the rest of the world of my existence. “ Oh, and dad, in 20 years my faux-son will arrive and in 40 years, so will my faux-grandson”. Together we’ll raise Poopie to be the Nuevo-emperor he is destined to be. The three older me’s then proceed to raise little me and we all have a good time (bonus: whenever dad wasn’t looking we’d kick my big brothers butt for all the torment he put me through the first time around ;).
Then I would hop back into the time machine and go back 70 million years, cause I’ve always wanted to see T. Rex up close and personal. Then, I’d go back to the Big Bang and call it a day.
Quite often the winner doesn’t step forward right away. So you can buy the winning ticket (make sure the paper says that someone had purchased a winning ticket) and hold on to it for a couple weeks. No conflicts.
I’d go with chowder’s plan. I’d go back a short time, say one month with the winning lottery numbers. Buy one mega ticket and wait. When time flows forward to t[sub]0[/sub] I’d go meet my other self (remember I traveled back in time to a point where I had already existed so therefore there are now two of me coexisting. There is me[sub]0[/sub] and now me[sub]1[/sub]). I’d explain that we are going to be kick ass rich but have to be careful to avoid fraud claims. I would claim my lottery winnings in a lump sum payment (this is the seed money) and cash out several million. Make sure the bills are all older (at least 2 years old).
I would then go back in time about one year. Make surefire investments and longshot bets and sit back for a year, watching the investments grow and the bets win. I can set up accounts in my own name (why not, it is my own money and I am not stealing anyone else’s identity) in the Caymans. At the end of the year I am back to t[sub]0[/sub]. I meet up with the two other me (me[sub]1[/sub]and now me[sub]2[/sub] who just finished his one month trip). We now should have multi-millions probably approaching the billion mark.
We now have to split up the money and go our separate ways. Since me[sub]0[/sub] is now aged 1 year and 1 month more than the chronology from my birth and me[sub]2[/sub] is aged one month more than the chronology from his birth, the only logical one who can truly keep the Slypork identity is me[sub]1[/sub]. The other one and I need to create new identities, probably with plastic surgery as well. The three of us can then live out the rest of our lives in wealth and comfort.
The only sticking point will be my family. Since my wife and kids won’t travel with me for these trips there will be only one set of them. Me[sub]1[/sub] will stay with them while the other mes will be bachelors. We will not be allowed to have any contact with our family because word might leak out about what we have done. Me[sub]1[/sub] will keep us up to date on what is happening with them. After the statute of limitations expires (I believe it is 5 years) we can all have a big family reunion. And no one can touch us.
Why would more than one of you exist after the point you travel back in time? For one week there are two of you, then one of you hops into the machine, leaving only the original traveler who has caught up to the proper time period, right?
Just take enough money to hole up in a hotel room for a week. Your current self doesn’t even need to know you’re even there (and shouldn’t, if you already didn’t have could did know, if you get my meaning). Plus, you ignore all that anti-matter explodey possiblities.
IANA timetraveler so I guess I overthought it. There would be only one me after time flows back to t[sub]0[/sub]. So I don’t have to split my money, no plastic surgery and no bachelor life. Well, two out of three ain’t bad. 
I would like to add one last trip with the time machine, though. I’d set the timer for 9 PM, October 8, 1871, fill the machine with a side of beef and an incendiary device and send it to 137 DeKoven Street in Chicago, IL. I’d also include a fireproof note that says, “Property of Catherine O’Leary”.
I have to confess I have no idea what the Catherine O’Leary business is about.
Care to enlighten me
Mrs. O’Leary’s cow supposedly started the Great Chicago Fire of 1871.
The Great Chicago Fire of 1871. Believed to be started by her cow. A truly vicious animal.
Umm…right…I’m not a time traveller…either…
(Abort, abort…they may be on to me/us)
I want to go back into the past, five years or so at a time, stopping to catch the greatest musical acts of the era. I would make my last stop in the 1930s, just in time to qualify for the draft in WWII so I could kill some Nazis under my grandfather’s command. Of course, it’d be easy enough to win the lottery at any one of these stops. Combat pay, with no expenses, on top of my lottery winnings would be pretty nice, or, hell–I could go back, win the lottery, use my winnings for a college education, and get commissioned as an officer.
Considering you’re in the Netherlands, why don’t you just take some tulips instead? Hit the right time with the right tulips and you could set up quite a life for yourself.
How do you think he got to the 20th century?
:dubious:
Well, I’ve been thinking about it, & it seems to me that I can learn about the past by reading history, while I can only see the distant future by time travel, so I guess I’d go forward.
[QUOTE=Hostile Dialect]
I want to go back into the past, five years or so at a time, stopping to catch the greatest musical acts of the era. I would make my last stop in the 1930s, just in time to qualify for the draft in WWII so I could kill some Nazis under my grandfather’s command. Of course, it’d be easy enough to win the lottery at any one of these stops. Combat pay, with no expenses, on top of my lottery winnings would be pretty nice, or, hell–I could go back, win the lottery, use my winnings for a college education, and get commissioned as an officer.
Your lottery winnings from earlier than the 1930s would be of no use to you, think about it
I guess we’re supposed to assume that, if we go into the future, we won’t immediately be arrested for tax evasion.
[QUOTE=chowder]
Should be later not earlier :smack:
Nope. Read Asimov’s Loint of Paw regarding time travel and the law.
Spring, 1929, with a suitable wardrobe, some stock tips, a few penicillin cultures, and the name of a good bootlegger.