# Your wife has a baby; how much time off did you take? **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [September 29, 2010, 2:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-wife-has-a-baby-how-much-time-off-did-you-take/555466 "2010-09-29T14:02:31Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 10\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![FairyChatMom](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fairychatmom/32/21906_2.png) [@FairyChatMom](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FairyChatMom)\ **Post date:** [September 29, 2010, 9:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-wife-has-a-baby-how-much-time-off-did-you-take/555466/21 "2010-09-29T21:37:28Z")
When our daughter was born, I was the only one working - husband was going to school as a disabled vet, but his monthly stipend had not started. So I had to go back to work after 3 weeks - 1 week was unpaid because I hadn’t been on that job very long and I had almost no leave. He helped out when he wasn’t in class. It was a challenging time. We were lucky to find a fabulous daycare - that made all the difference in the world. ---
**Author:** ![Cat\_Fight](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/90ced4/32.png) [@Cat\_Fight](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Fight)\ **Post date:** [September 30, 2010, 10:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-wife-has-a-baby-how-much-time-off-did-you-take/555466/22 "2010-09-30T22:14:50Z")
Any Swedish Doper parents who can come in here and put the whole nation to shame? This thread paints a pretty sad picture of parenthood in America, especially when read after [this one](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=577530&page=4) on child support (where the OP’s situation might be quite different if he could change his work schedule to accommodate his children and not fear for his job… and perhaps the court system would be different if it was assumed all men would co-parent and should be given legally-mandated time off. But then I guess the time off for pregnant women and new mothers is skint already). ---
**Author:** ![Happy\_Lendervedder](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/happy_lendervedder/32/8488_2.png) [@Happy\_Lendervedder](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Happy_Lendervedder)\ **Post date:** [September 30, 2010, 10:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-wife-has-a-baby-how-much-time-off-did-you-take/555466/23 "2010-09-30T22:49:18Z")
I took 6 weeks for my son-- 1 week paid by my employer, five weeks of sick and vacation. For my daughter (due in February), I’m taking 6 months, 1 week paid by employer, some time using sick and vacation, and the rest unpaid. ---
**Author:** ![Joey\_P](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/919ad9/32.png) [@Joey\_P](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Joey_P)\ **Post date:** [September 30, 2010, 10:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-wife-has-a-baby-how-much-time-off-did-you-take/555466/24 "2010-09-30T22:58:57Z")
I took two or three, maybe 4 full days off. But I work for my dad and only live a few minutes away. So for the following few weeks I was doing a lot of short days and running home a few times each day. My (ex)MIL took a week off of work and spent most of that time at my house helping out. ---
**Author:** ![Lanzy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/74df32/32.png) [@Lanzy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lanzy)\ **Post date:** [September 30, 2010, 11:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-wife-has-a-baby-how-much-time-off-did-you-take/555466/25 "2010-09-30T23:13:47Z")
I was allowed to be there the day of the birth and I was allowed a couple of hours to take her home. She however got a full three weeks and had to be back at work the 22nd day or face charges. We were both in the Army. ---
**Author:** ![Maeglin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/8baadc/32.png) [@Maeglin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Maeglin)\ **Post date:** [October 1, 2010, 3:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-wife-has-a-baby-how-much-time-off-did-you-take/555466/26 "2010-10-01T03:36:18Z")
My son was born on a Wednesday. We got home from the hospital on Friday morning. I was on conference calls three or four hours later. ---
**Author:** ![Velma](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/85e7bf/32.png) [@Velma](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Velma)\ **Post date:** [October 1, 2010, 4:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-wife-has-a-baby-how-much-time-off-did-you-take/555466/27 "2010-10-01T04:15:27Z")
M husband took off about a week with both our babies. I took 12 weeks each time (much unpaid). Nursing was hard…I think the U. S. Is insane when it comes to leave for babies. ---
**Author:** ![Septima](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/dc4da7/32.png) [@Septima](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Septima)\ **Post date:** [October 1, 2010, 4:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-wife-has-a-baby-how-much-time-off-did-you-take/555466/28 "2010-10-01T04:15:53Z")
Paternity leave has just been upped to ten weeks, and any guy who doesn’t take his full share is pretty much considered an ass, as it should be. ---
**Author:** ![panache45](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/panache45/32/64_2.png) [@panache45](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/panache45)\ **Post date:** [October 1, 2010, 4:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-wife-has-a-baby-how-much-time-off-did-you-take/555466/29 "2010-10-01T04:50:40Z")
I think it depends whether the baby is actually his. (sorry) ---
**Author:** ![Markxxx](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/5daacb/32.png) [@Markxxx](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Markxxx)\ **Post date:** [October 1, 2010, 9:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-wife-has-a-baby-how-much-time-off-did-you-take/555466/30 "2010-10-01T09:45:55Z")
Remember under FMLA your employer CAN require you to use up your paid time while charging it against your FMLA at the same time. You’re only allowed 12 weeks of leave by law. And your employer isn’t required to give you the earned vacation and/or sick time in ADDITION to the 12 weeks of FMLA time. Of course if they want to do this they can or if the company is small enough FMLA won’t apply [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-wife-has-a-baby-how-much-time-off-did-you-take/555466.md?page=1)