# You're a bilionaire and want to give your kids the best possible upbringing. **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [February 27, 2016, 6:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/youre-a-bilionaire-and-want-to-give-your-kids-the-best-possible-upbringing/747318 "2016-02-27T18:43:04Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 7\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![Shodan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/9f8e36/32.png) [@Shodan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shodan)\ **Post date:** [March 1, 2016, 2:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/youre-a-bilionaire-and-want-to-give-your-kids-the-best-possible-upbringing/747318/41 "2016-03-01T14:18:58Z")
> [@Lemur866](#): > > What’s so great about middle class values, that enable someone to survive as a billionaire? Because they teach that work is valuable, and that those who work are worthy of respect, and to delay gratification, and other values that allow people, billionaires or no, to succeed. You seem to think that being a billionaire puts one in a class apart, where learning to work is unncessary. That is not going to be the case. Middle class values are just as worthwhile for the children of a billionaire as they are for the middle class. Middle class values work. The attitude “you don’t need to worry about anything and you can look down your nose at those who have to get up in the morning” as expressed elsewhere in the thread is no conducive to multi-generational success. The devil finds work for idle hands - witness, as mentioned, the history of many lottery winners and rich kids. “You don’t have to work, and you can buy anything you want” is not going to raise someone who is happy. It sounds paradoxical, but it is true. That’s why Bill Gates is giving away most of his money, instead of leaving billions to his children. Regards, Shodan ---
**Author:** ![msmith537](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/d9b06d/32.png) [@msmith537](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/msmith537)\ **Post date:** [March 1, 2016, 2:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/youre-a-bilionaire-and-want-to-give-your-kids-the-best-possible-upbringing/747318/42 "2016-03-01T14:24:20Z")
> [@Shodan](#): > > My point exactly. He will need to be emotionally stable, and willing to work for his living, in order to do that. But technically he won’t need to work for his living. Neither will his grandkids. What he will need to work for is to accomplish things he wants to accomplish. I’m not sure an after school job flipping burgers will teach him that. The only lessons I learned from working off and on since I was 16 is: - Having more money is a lot better than not having it - Working for someone else sucks - Having to work to survive sucks - There are a million things I’d rather be doing every day than be at work, but none of them pay > [@Shodan](#): > > The notion that only the inferior work for a living, and that he is above all that because he is going to inherit money, does not strike me as a good lesson to teach him if you want him to succeed in managing your business or investments. It’s not about being “inferior”, but the fact of the matter is that he will be above all that because he won’t need to work. > [@Shodan](#): > > The traditional American story is rags, to riches, to rags. Or consider how so many who win the lottery wind up broke. They didn’t think they had to work either. Easy come, easy go - that applies to the children of billionaires, at least if they have been taught that all they need to do is sign checks, and/or look down their noses at everyone else. I wonder how frequently people really go from rags to riches to rags again. Most of the stories I hear about are celebrities or lottery winners with little education who suddenly fall into wealth and then bankrupt themselves living way beyond their means. Plenty of rich people die rich. A few years back, I was watching a show about lottery winners. Interestingly, one of the biggest problems with suddenly coming into a windfall is that most people don’t know what to do with themselves. Celebrities and rich businesspeople tend to not have this problem because their wealth is the product of their passion and interest. And people who grow up with wealth don’t know any different from being around money all the time. But a lottery winner who suddenly has the ability to do whatever they want often doesn’t really know what they want to do. Or they find that they still couldn’t be a successful writer if only they had the time. So a lot of them turn to drugs, alcohol and general debauchery. ---
**Author:** ![Nava](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/da6949/32.png) [@Nava](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nava)\ **Post date:** [March 1, 2016, 2:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/youre-a-bilionaire-and-want-to-give-your-kids-the-best-possible-upbringing/747318/43 "2016-03-01T14:31:36Z")
> [@Lemur866](#): > > Why exactly is busting your ass for a pittance such an important life lesson for kids? Because as adults most of us have to bust our asses for a pittance, and so the quicker we get used to the idea the better off we are. Also because one of the best weapons in being able to get people to do what you want is the understanding of where they come from. This is specially important when dealing with people who won’t put their cards on the table: the ability to read through their hands is priceless. ---
**Author:** ![bump](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/7c8e57/32.png) [@bump](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bump)\ **Post date:** [March 1, 2016, 5:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/youre-a-bilionaire-and-want-to-give-your-kids-the-best-possible-upbringing/747318/44 "2016-03-01T17:44:29Z")
> [@Lemur866](#): > > Why exactly is busting your ass for a pittance such an important life lesson for kids? Because as adults most of us have to bust our asses for a pittance, and so the quicker we get used to the idea the better off we are. I was thinking more along the lines of teaching children the value of money and how to spend it. Being a billionaire and giving my kids an 75k per year “allowance” isn’t going to teach that. But doing crap jobs like washing cars and mowing yards, and earning $25 bucks a pop, saving that up, and blowing it on something unsatisfying or pissing it away on nickel and dime crap will. So will continuing to work and saving up more and having to now consider how to spend it, with those lessons learned under your belt. Plus, it builds resilience and confidence; fucking up, getting up and going back at it is a valuable lesson and habit to learn. Most of us learned that stuff fairly early on by that exact sort of trial and error, whether it was engineered by our parents (what I’m proposing), or it happened naturally after you were on your own. I’d think this sort of understanding of money would be even more valuable for the child of a billionaire, as they’re in a position to piss away staggering amounts of cash, or to blow staggering amounts of cash on big ticket items. > [@Lemur866](#): > > Again, if it’s so great for your kids to learn how to be middle class drones, then what’s the point of you having a billion dollars? Why not chuck it all to lead the good life of the typical American cubicle drone? My thinking would be that any billion dollars I’ll ever end up with will almost certainly be the result of a massive windfall- either directly, or through investing some other massive, although maybe not billion-dollar windfall. And family fortunes change; I’m not necessarily setting MY children up to be billionaires, hopefully I’m teaching values that my children will teach their children, and so on. Parts of my family have been pretty wealthy in the past, and others have been dirt poor; right now, we’re all squarely in the middle/upper-middle class, mostly due to the last 3 generations’ valuation of thrift, hard work and education, and probably most importantly, a mentality that what you’re doing is as much for the next couple generations of your family as it is for yourself. ---
**Author:** ![msmith537](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/d9b06d/32.png) [@msmith537](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/msmith537)\ **Post date:** [March 1, 2016, 7:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/youre-a-bilionaire-and-want-to-give-your-kids-the-best-possible-upbringing/747318/45 "2016-03-01T19:55:15Z")
> [@Nava](#): > > Also because one of the best weapons in being able to get people to do what you want is the understanding of where they come from. This is specially important when dealing with people who won’t put their cards on the table: the ability to read through their hands is priceless. A better weapon is owning most of the pot, the cards, and the table. I’m not sure why there is this romanticized notion that growing up hard class gives you supernatural people skills and emotional intelligence. In fact, much of the literature I’ve read (and anecdotal experience) on the subject seem to indicate that the opposite is true. How about going with some variation of the “Brewster’s Millions” challenge instead? $1 million upfront, or spend $10 million\* within 30 days with no assets at the end of it in order to inherit $1 billion. Failing to spend all the money results in receiving nothing. Same rules apply: - Must get fair market value for the services of anyone he hires. - Can donate up to 5% to charity or gifts - No more than 5% can go towards gambling losses - No purchasing and destroying valuable items - All purchases must be legal - Can’t tell anyone - In the film it was $30 million, but I think that might be too much. I don’t want to make it super-difficult or piss away $30 either. ---
**Author:** ![DrCube](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/a3d4f5/32.png) [@DrCube](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DrCube)\ **Post date:** [March 2, 2016, 10:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/youre-a-bilionaire-and-want-to-give-your-kids-the-best-possible-upbringing/747318/46 "2016-03-02T22:00:13Z")
I’m going to teach my kid to be Batman. And I’m a billionaire, so who’s going to stop me? ---
**Author:** ![Velocity](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/velocity/32/18006_2.png) [@Velocity](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Velocity)\ **Post date:** [March 2, 2016, 10:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/youre-a-bilionaire-and-want-to-give-your-kids-the-best-possible-upbringing/747318/47 "2016-03-02T22:53:51Z")
> [@the\_diego](#): > > Make it clear they have no inheritance whatsoever, and no support beyond a college education. Too drastic, no? [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/youre-a-bilionaire-and-want-to-give-your-kids-the-best-possible-upbringing/747318.md?page=2)