# "YOU'RE a hooker!" (OR "Buy your mate on teh intarwebz!") **URL:** \ **Category:** Great Debates\ **Created:** [May 19, 2009, 6:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/youre-a-hooker-or-buy-your-mate-on-teh-intarwebz/496990 "2009-05-19T18:06:40Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 12\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![Sleel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/73ab20/32.png) [@Sleel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sleel)\ **Post date:** [May 21, 2009, 3:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/youre-a-hooker-or-buy-your-mate-on-teh-intarwebz/496990/61 "2009-05-21T03:00:59Z")
Sounds like [“compensated dating”](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Enjo_k%C5%8Dsai) to me. I actually don’t find anything wrong with prostitution but yeah, it does feel dishonest that there doesn’t seem to even be any wink-wink acknowledgment of the similarity between sex for money and dating for gifts. [Classic Onion article](http://www.theonion.com/content/node/39495) that seems relevant. ---
**Author:** ![furt](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/439d5e/32.png) [@furt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/furt)\ **Post date:** [May 21, 2009, 3:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/youre-a-hooker-or-buy-your-mate-on-teh-intarwebz/496990/62 "2009-05-21T15:19:42Z")
> [@VinylTurnip](#): > > What’s the name of that site where middle-aged men can hook up with young, tight, incredibly wealthy women who want to support them? I just so happen to know of one very lucky guy who just started dating a younger woman who makes twice his salary. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Fuzzy\_Dunlop](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/848f3c/32.png) [@Fuzzy\_Dunlop](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fuzzy_Dunlop)\ **Post date:** [May 21, 2009, 3:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/youre-a-hooker-or-buy-your-mate-on-teh-intarwebz/496990/63 "2009-05-21T15:51:24Z")
> [@Sleel](#): > > Sounds like [“compensated dating”](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Enjo_k%C5%8Dsai) to me. I actually don’t find anything wrong with prostitution but yeah, it does feel dishonest that there doesn’t seem to even be any wink-wink acknowledgment of the similarity between sex for money and dating for gifts. After making fun of it the other day, I decided to ‘try’ it out yesterday - purely out of curiosity. First observation was that there are exceptionally few women on it. I’m not really surprised they don’t have wide usage nationwide, but they don’t. Guys will continue to buy their whores in flyover states the old fashioned way. Second, in the handful of women I looked at, none of them seemed to realize it’s a secret whore site. All the profiles looked about as banal and insubstantial as every other online personal I’ve ever seen. I think that says more about internet dating sites at large than this one. I saw no indication that the women were “dating for presents”, or realized that was the intent of the site. The closest I saw was a college student who talked about her beauty pageant experience and had a fairly high opinion of herself. But I think she was just proud of herself and knew she was very pretty - the profile would have fit in on any other site just as well. I didn’t bother looking at any of the men. Maybe later. ---
**Author:** ![billfish678](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/7bcc69/32.png) [@billfish678](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/billfish678)\ **Post date:** [May 21, 2009, 3:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/youre-a-hooker-or-buy-your-mate-on-teh-intarwebz/496990/64 "2009-05-21T15:52:50Z")
> [@Sleel](#): > > Sounds like [“compensated dating”](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Enjo_k%C5%8Dsai) to me. I actually don’t find anything wrong with prostitution but yeah, it does feel dishonest that there doesn’t seem to even be any wink-wink acknowledgment of the similarity between sex for money and dating for gifts. > > . Ohh…I dunno…about 50 percent of the population knows what is going on. They just dont talk about it much because it pisses off the other 50 percent. ---
**Author:** ![Snowboarder\_Bo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/snowboarder_bo/32/229_2.png) [@Snowboarder\_Bo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Snowboarder_Bo)\ **Post date:** [May 21, 2009, 9:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/youre-a-hooker-or-buy-your-mate-on-teh-intarwebz/496990/65 "2009-05-21T21:11:58Z")
I keep coming back to this: what would I say to a friend/relative/co-worker who told me he had met his wife or girlfriend through this particular website? Can’t really say what my _reaction_ would be, but I know that inside I would lose some respect for the guy. And lose a lot of respect for his GF/wife/whore. Unless he was like, “yeah, you really can’t beat just buying a woman; it’s so much CLEARER than dating” in which case I would at least know that he (and hopefully she) were upfront and honest about what they were arranging and engaging in. ---
**Author:** ![XT](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/xt/32/456_2.png) [@XT](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/XT)\ **Post date:** [May 21, 2009, 9:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/youre-a-hooker-or-buy-your-mate-on-teh-intarwebz/496990/66 "2009-05-21T21:36:58Z")
[QUOTE=Snowboarder Bo] I keep coming back to this: what would I say to a friend/relative/co-worker who told me he had met his wife or girlfriend through this particular website? [/QUOTE] Why should you say anything at all about it? It’s really not your affair (so to speak). Sort of like if your theoretical friend/relative/cow-orker had met this person in a bar, or walking the streets…or if they were of the same sex. > [@](#): > > Can’t really say what my reaction would be, but I know that inside I would lose some respect for the guy. And lose a lot of respect for his GF/wife/whore. Well, that’s obviously your own lookout. Myself, I try not to make judgment calls like that. I actually know someone who’s wife was a prostitute at one time, and I’ve known several people who stayed in relationships long after they had lost any respect/love for the other person simply because of the security aspect…despite the fact that their SO required sex from them. Seriously, this sounds more like your own hangup. Which is cool, as long as you realize it. My only REAL question is…was I right? Was the line from Trading Places? 😉 -XT ---
**Author:** ![Miller](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/miller/32/481_2.png) [@Miller](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Miller)\ **Post date:** [May 21, 2009, 9:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/youre-a-hooker-or-buy-your-mate-on-teh-intarwebz/496990/67 "2009-05-21T21:50:31Z")
> [@xtisme](#): > > My only REAL question is…was I right? Was the line from Trading Places? 😉 Nope. See posts 25 and 26. ---
**Author:** ![XT](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/xt/32/456_2.png) [@XT](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/XT)\ **Post date:** [May 21, 2009, 9:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/youre-a-hooker-or-buy-your-mate-on-teh-intarwebz/496990/68 "2009-05-21T21:51:18Z")
:smack: Missed it…and was wrong too. Man…typical… -XT ---
**Author:** ![Snowboarder\_Bo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/snowboarder_bo/32/229_2.png) [@Snowboarder\_Bo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Snowboarder_Bo)\ **Post date:** [May 21, 2009, 11:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/youre-a-hooker-or-buy-your-mate-on-teh-intarwebz/496990/69 "2009-05-21T23:33:55Z")
> [@xtisme](#): > > Why should you say anything at all about it? It’s really not your affair (so to speak). Sort of like if your theoretical friend/relative/cow-orker had met this person in a bar, or walking the streets…or if they were of the same sex. Once someone else brings up an aspect of their life in conversation, it’s perfectly reasonable to make comments in response to their comments. In our culture, this is called “conversation”. > [@](#): > > Well, that’s obviously your own lookout. Myself, I try not to make judgment calls like that. I actually know someone who’s wife was a prostitute at one time, Not relevant. The people I was talking about would be a perpetual prostitute, and a constant john. > [@](#): > > and I’ve known several people who stayed in relationships long after they had lost any respect/love for the other person simply because of the security aspect…despite the fact that their SO required sex from them. Again, not relevant. Different situations, different circumstances entirely from what this thread is about. > [@](#): > > Seriously, this sounds more like your own hangup. Which is cool, as long as you realize it. No, it’s not really a hangup at all. It’s just what I think. > [@](#): > > My only REAL question is…was I right? Was the line from Trading Places? 😉 > > -XT No. You’re wrong yet again. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![XT](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/xt/32/456_2.png) [@XT](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/XT)\ **Post date:** [May 21, 2009, 11:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/youre-a-hooker-or-buy-your-mate-on-teh-intarwebz/496990/70 "2009-05-21T23:57:44Z")
[QUOTE=Snowboarder Bo] Once someone else brings up an aspect of their life in conversation, it’s perfectly reasonable to make comments in response to their comments. In our culture, this is called “conversation”. [/QUOTE] Sure…but most folks aren’t going to like being judged. YMMV of course but I’d tend to dislike it, personally. > [@](#): > > Not relevant. The people I was talking about would be a perpetual prostitute, and a constant john. In your opinion. Which, if you’ll pardon me, seems a bit prudish and repressed. Again, YMMV of course. Frankly I’m a live and let live kind of guy. To paraphrase Eddy Murphy ‘You go ahead and suck that dick. I’m going to get a beer’. > [@](#): > > Again, not relevant. Different situations, different circumstances entirely from what this thread is about. It’s all part of one continuum of human behavior. > [@](#): > > No, it’s not really a hangup at all. It’s just what I think. And that’s cool. Different strokes and all that. > [@](#): > > No. You’re wrong yet again. C’est la vie. It happens with distressing frequency. -XT ---
**Author:** ![Snowboarder\_Bo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/snowboarder_bo/32/229_2.png) [@Snowboarder\_Bo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Snowboarder_Bo)\ **Post date:** [May 22, 2009, 1:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/youre-a-hooker-or-buy-your-mate-on-teh-intarwebz/496990/71 "2009-05-22T01:02:45Z")
> [@xtisme](#): > > Sure…but most folks aren’t going to like being judged. YMMV of course but I’d tend to dislike it, personally. > > In your opinion. Which, if you’ll pardon me, seems a bit prudish and repressed. Again, YMMV of course. Frankly I’m a live and let live kind of guy. To paraphrase Eddy Murphy ‘You go ahead and suck that dick. I’m going to get a beer’. > > It’s all part of one continuum of human behavior. > > And that’s cool. Different strokes and all that. > > C’est la vie. It happens with distressing frequency. > > -XT You said you try not to make judgement calls about people, then you said you know most folks don’t like being judged, but then (in almost the very next sentence) you call me prudish and repressed. :rolleyes: Good one. ---
**Author:** ![XT](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/xt/32/456_2.png) [@XT](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/XT)\ **Post date:** [May 22, 2009, 1:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/youre-a-hooker-or-buy-your-mate-on-teh-intarwebz/496990/72 "2009-05-22T01:19:49Z")
I said I TRY not too… -XT [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/youre-a-hooker-or-buy-your-mate-on-teh-intarwebz/496990.md?page=3)