# You're a roving do-gooder. Do you stick around for thank-yous, or go the Lone Ranger route? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [December 29, 2012, 9:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/youre-a-roving-do-gooder-do-you-stick-around-for-thank-yous-or-go-the-lone-ranger-route/645519 "2012-12-29T21:19:08Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ecccb3/32.png) [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skald_the_Rhymer)\ **Post date:** [December 29, 2012, 9:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/youre-a-roving-do-gooder-do-you-stick-around-for-thank-yous-or-go-the-lone-ranger-route/645519/1 "2012-12-29T21:19:08Z")
It has come to my attention that a certain “rival” of Rhymer Enterprises is looking to hire some professional roving do-gooders. Rival is in quotes for two reasons. One, these hippies are on the side of truth, liberty, justice, & puppy dogs, so they’re clearly not RhE _competitors_; and also because their ridiculous non-profit-motivated business model just makes me laugh and laugh and laugh. But enough editorializing. The roving do-gooder job involves roaming around the country of your choice, righting wrongs and singing songs; if/when you encounter hot grieving widow(er)s, you may comfort them as your conscience dictates. Standard equipment includes a continua buggy, sonic screwdriver, hand phaser, image inducer, force shield belt, and personal teleporter implant. You also get an amulet you can use to zero in on people in trouble, and you can set it to give preference to given sorts of danger; that is, you can arrange things so battered wives or starving orphans or grieving widows or whatnot get priority. (The work needn’t be violent, by the way; if you want to focus on TB vaccinations and digging wells, the hippies say go with God.) The pay’s heavenly (assume the hippies are tripling your current pay), and you get free medical & dental coverage. Assuming you take this job, are you going to go the Lone Ranger route and, once the day is saved, leave before anyone can say thank you? Or will you stick around with your new friends till the next job comes up? For that matter, what sort of missions will you set the amulet to give preference to, and why? ---
**Author:** ![VunderBob](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/839c29/32.png) [@VunderBob](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/VunderBob)\ **Post date:** [December 29, 2012, 9:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/youre-a-roving-do-gooder-do-you-stick-around-for-thank-yous-or-go-the-lone-ranger-route/645519/2 "2012-12-29T21:24:39Z")
I go The Lone Ranger route, with a tagline. “That’s what they pay me the big bucks for.” ---
**Author:** ![TriPolar](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tripolar/32/3008_2.png) [@TriPolar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TriPolar)\ **Post date:** [December 29, 2012, 9:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/youre-a-roving-do-gooder-do-you-stick-around-for-thank-yous-or-go-the-lone-ranger-route/645519/3 "2012-12-29T21:31:54Z")
Generally Lone Ranger. But when I set the amulet for problems that are common among young hot nymphomaniac twins I’ll be sticking around for a while. ---
**Author:** ![Rubixcube](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/8e7dd6/32.png) [@Rubixcube](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rubixcube)\ **Post date:** [December 29, 2012, 9:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/youre-a-roving-do-gooder-do-you-stick-around-for-thank-yous-or-go-the-lone-ranger-route/645519/4 "2012-12-29T21:36:37Z")
Seems that since there’s little-to-no downtime you’d probably be going from emergency to emergency pretty quickly. I’d imagine the whole “I don’t know how to thank you” thing would get kinda old after hearing it dozens of times over the course of a week or so. Besides, you’d always be thinking about the things you _could_ have done in the time it took to listen to all those thanks. So I vote for the Lone Ranger approach. “Why than-” “Shut up bitch! I’ve got a busload of blind orphans to save!” _teleports away_ ---
**Author:** ![Amateur\_Barbarian](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/59ef9b/32.png) [@Amateur\_Barbarian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Amateur_Barbarian)\ **Post date:** [December 29, 2012, 9:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/youre-a-roving-do-gooder-do-you-stick-around-for-thank-yous-or-go-the-lone-ranger-route/645519/5 "2012-12-29T21:37:43Z")
Lone Ranger. But I may be about to do an Iron Man on a national scale. ---
**Author:** ![WhyNot](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/c77e96/32.png) [@WhyNot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WhyNot)\ **Post date:** [December 29, 2012, 9:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/youre-a-roving-do-gooder-do-you-stick-around-for-thank-yous-or-go-the-lone-ranger-route/645519/6 "2012-12-29T21:40:42Z")
I think I’d probably go about half and half. I appreciate appreciation, especially of me. But I can see where all those laurel wreaths would get hard to store, and there’s only so many bay leaves one kitchen needs. And wailing grandmothers are just too much. Besides, you gotta be careful with those native thank you bonfires. Never know who you’re going to end up married to before its over. (I \*am \*a buxom redhead, so that danger is slight, but I could end up married to a dashing antihero with a wry sense of humor and tight pants.) ---
**Author:** ![Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ecccb3/32.png) [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skald_the_Rhymer)\ **Post date:** [December 29, 2012, 9:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/youre-a-roving-do-gooder-do-you-stick-around-for-thank-yous-or-go-the-lone-ranger-route/645519/7 "2012-12-29T21:40:51Z")
> [@TriPolar](#): > > problems that are common among young hot nymphomaniac twins So you’ll be delivering a lot of antibiotics for assorted STDs? > [@Rubixcube](#): > > Seems that since there’s little-to-no downtime you’d probably be going from emergency to emergency pretty quickly. I’d imagine the whole “I don’t know how to thank you” thing would get kinda old after hearing it dozens of times over the course of a week or so. Besides, you’d always be thinking about the things you _could_ have done in the time it took to listen to all those thanks. So I vote for the Lone Ranger approach. > > “Why than-” “Shut up bitch! I’ve got a busload of blind orphans to save!” _teleports away_ I don’t know where you’re getting the no-downtime thing. The OP doesn’t say a thing about it. No reason to think you won’t be allowed to work an ordinary 40-hour work week most of the time. You’re not being given Kryptonian super-powers, after all. > [@WhyNot](#): > > I think I’d probably go about half and half. I appreciate appreciation, especially of me. But I can see where all those laurel wreaths would get hard to store, and there’s only so many bay leaves one kitchen needs. And wailing grandmothers are just too much. > > Besides, you gotta be careful with those native thank you bonfires. Never know who you’re going to end up married to before its over. (I \*am \*a buxom redhead, so that danger is slight, but I could end up married to a dashing antihero with a wry sense of humor and tight pants.) I see no reason you couldn’t request an iPad to go along with your standard gear, and you’d be a fool not to read up on the native customs via HippiPedia before starting a job. You’ve got a continua buggy, after all; there’s no excuse for not taking the time to to the job right. ---
**Author:** ![kanicbird](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/5f8ce5/32.png) [@kanicbird](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kanicbird)\ **Post date:** [December 29, 2012, 9:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/youre-a-roving-do-gooder-do-you-stick-around-for-thank-yous-or-go-the-lone-ranger-route/645519/8 "2012-12-29T21:42:23Z")
I have done both, more lone ranger’ing in the past, but I have found that mant people have a desire to say thanks and it’s good and helpful to receive that, so now I do tend to stick around and view the lone ranger approach as potentially selfish. ---
**Author:** ![Rubixcube](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/8e7dd6/32.png) [@Rubixcube](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rubixcube)\ **Post date:** [December 29, 2012, 9:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/youre-a-roving-do-gooder-do-you-stick-around-for-thank-yous-or-go-the-lone-ranger-route/645519/9 "2012-12-29T21:49:44Z")
> [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](#): > > I don’t know where you’re getting the no-downtime thing. The OP doesn’t say a thing about it. No reason to think you won’t be allowed to work an ordinary 40-hour work week most of the time. You’re not being given Kryptonian super-powers, after all. I meant that the job itself doesn’t seem like it would have much downtime. Police officers and firefighters and the like have to wait for calls, do paperwork, respond to mundane and non-emergency stuff, etc. Here you’d basically be teleporting from problem to problem saving people. Even in a normal workweek that adds up to a much larger number of people to save and listen too. ---
**Author:** ![Magiver](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/4491bb/32.png) [@Magiver](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Magiver)\ **Post date:** [December 29, 2012, 10:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/youre-a-roving-do-gooder-do-you-stick-around-for-thank-yous-or-go-the-lone-ranger-route/645519/10 "2012-12-29T22:16:23Z")
It’s pretty difficult, if not rude, to run away. I try to make it quick and wave as I leave. Sometimes it’s so comical you can’t get away. I saw a guy with a flat tire a year ago and just happened to have all my tools in the trunk including the jack. I jumped out with the jack and an electric drill to run the jack up and spin the nuts on/off plus I had a compressor to pump up the guy’s spare. It looked like an Indy500 tire change. vring vring vring vring vring, tire off, tire on, nuts spun on and car lowered. You’re pretty much stuck there listening to some thank-you’s while you put the tools away. ---
**Author:** ![Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ecccb3/32.png) [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skald_the_Rhymer)\ **Post date:** [December 29, 2012, 10:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/youre-a-roving-do-gooder-do-you-stick-around-for-thank-yous-or-go-the-lone-ranger-route/645519/11 "2012-12-29T22:17:21Z")
> [@kanicbird](#): > > I have done both, more lone ranger’ing in the past, but I have found that mant people have a desire to say thanks and it’s good and helpful to receive that, so now I do tend to stick around and view the lone ranger approach as potentially selfish. There was an episode of _Angel_ or _Doctor Who_ or perhaps _Touched By A Hot Irish Chick_, in which Wesley Wyndham-Pryce or Rory Williams or Della Reese pointed out the problem with entirely pro-bono, freebie, mysterious entrance-and-exit-without thanks do-gooding. It doesn’t give the rescuee the chance for closure and whatnot, and may well lead to her or him getting fixated on the dramatic hero rather than moving on with her or his life. Admittedly that was an argument for the ensouled vampire or the last Time Lord or the hot Irish chick to charge for their services as appropriate rather than constantly giving freebies, but I think it might also apply to letting the town you just saved from the robot spiders give you a celebratory dinner. > [@Rubixcube](#): > > I meant that the job itself doesn’t seem like it would have much downtime. Police officers and firefighters and the like have to wait for calls, do paperwork, respond to mundane and non-emergency stuff, etc. Here you’d basically be teleporting from problem to problem saving people. Even in a normal workweek that adds up to a much larger number of people to save and listen too. Pretending to take my own ridiculous idea seriously … You’re thinking about the mission wrong, I think. I’ll grant that there’s always somebody in trouble somewhere or other, but that doesn’t mean you have to rush to every possible emergency. In fact I think the hippies would rather you didn’t, because all that’ll do is burn you out. The thing to do is to set the amulet to alert you to the pedophiles or whatever, pop in for a quick burning-off-of-the-pedo’s-face followed by getting the victim to social services or whatever, and once that job is finished taking a reasonable break. And of course, you’d best schedule yourself for an easy win or three in between the heartbreaker jobs. ---
**Author:** ![WhyNot](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/c77e96/32.png) [@WhyNot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WhyNot)\ **Post date:** [December 29, 2012, 10:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/youre-a-roving-do-gooder-do-you-stick-around-for-thank-yous-or-go-the-lone-ranger-route/645519/12 "2012-12-29T22:45:20Z")
I was going to write a memo to give my [del]minions [/del] Brothers and Sisters some guidelines in these matters, but then I remembered that memos are evil, so I can’t. ---
**Author:** ![simster](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/simster/32/1047_2.png) [@simster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/simster)\ **Post date:** [December 29, 2012, 10:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/youre-a-roving-do-gooder-do-you-stick-around-for-thank-yous-or-go-the-lone-ranger-route/645519/13 "2012-12-29T22:46:23Z")
Lone Ranger all the way - it helps spread the myth better and I can read the grattitude in the books and poems they will (undoubtedly) write about my adventures. Something like [this](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Anp3vAJjYBg), I’m sure ---
**Author:** ![monstro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/ba9def/32.png) [@monstro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/monstro)\ **Post date:** [December 29, 2012, 11:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/youre-a-roving-do-gooder-do-you-stick-around-for-thank-yous-or-go-the-lone-ranger-route/645519/14 "2012-12-29T23:45:16Z")
Sporadic Lone Ranger. I don’t want people to feel obligated to express thanks, nor do I want to entertain a whole bunch of fanfair and publicity. But it would be nice for an old lady to make me an apple pie every now and then. And I’d like to be able to get out of speeding tickets too. ---
**Author:** ![ducati](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/cc9497/32.png) [@ducati](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ducati)\ **Post date:** [December 29, 2012, 11:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/youre-a-roving-do-gooder-do-you-stick-around-for-thank-yous-or-go-the-lone-ranger-route/645519/15 "2012-12-29T23:52:23Z")
Lone Ranger. I see a need, I help, I move on. Thanks are nice when offered, but I don’t go looking for them. Mrs. and I came upon an overturned car on a twisty road moments after the crash. It took a halligan to get in the back hatch, but I crawled in, popped her seat belt and brought her out. She was unhurt, but we waited until the FD got there, then left. It was the day before my wedding, and we had things to do. Years later, she found me. A good friend of mine was the paramedic that responded, and he mentioned that to her. She went thru the FD to find him, and then me to thank me. She was getting married soon, and the firemen told her she wouldn’t be there if I hadn’t saved her. It’s nice to make a difference now and then. ---
**Author:** ![Paintcharge](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/paintcharge/32/7946_2.png) [@Paintcharge](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Paintcharge)\ **Post date:** [December 30, 2012, 1:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/youre-a-roving-do-gooder-do-you-stick-around-for-thank-yous-or-go-the-lone-ranger-route/645519/16 "2012-12-30T01:31:35Z")
Gotta go with the Lone Ranger route. Too much risk of ending up with an “Our Miss Reynolds.” ---
**Author:** ![Oakminster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/77aa72/32.png) [@Oakminster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Oakminster)\ **Post date:** [December 30, 2012, 1:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/youre-a-roving-do-gooder-do-you-stick-around-for-thank-yous-or-go-the-lone-ranger-route/645519/17 "2012-12-30T01:55:38Z")
Mostly Lone Ranger, when dealing with human/demi-humans in need of a hero. But given the inclinations of The Druidess, animal abusers will be considered a high value target, and I’ll probably load up the continua-buggy with rescued critters of various types to drop off at Oakgrove between missions. Prolly ought to study up on the Butterfly Effect, though. A certain NFL QB currently in Philadelphia is way overdue for an ass-kicking, and since I can time travel…let’s just say the Eagles will have an opening on their roster from 2009-present. ---
**Author:** ![Nunzio\_Tavulari](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/b9bd4f/32.png) [@Nunzio\_Tavulari](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nunzio_Tavulari)\ **Post date:** [December 30, 2012, 2:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/youre-a-roving-do-gooder-do-you-stick-around-for-thank-yous-or-go-the-lone-ranger-route/645519/18 "2012-12-30T02:21:36Z")
I gotta go with Lone Ranger. If they want to thank me they can glorify me in a movie. My usual cut is 10% of the gross. If it’s being marketed to children (or immature males), I need 5% of the merchandising. ---
**Author:** ![DrDeth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/b487fb/32.png) [@DrDeth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DrDeth)\ **Post date:** [December 30, 2012, 3:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/youre-a-roving-do-gooder-do-you-stick-around-for-thank-yous-or-go-the-lone-ranger-route/645519/19 "2012-12-30T03:49:10Z")
I love to perform random acts of kindness. But I am not so good as to not accept adulation for them, altho it’s certainly not necessary. ---
**Author:** ![Becky2844](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/91b2a8/32.png) [@Becky2844](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Becky2844)\ **Post date:** [December 30, 2012, 10:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/youre-a-roving-do-gooder-do-you-stick-around-for-thank-yous-or-go-the-lone-ranger-route/645519/20 "2012-12-30T10:08:20Z")
> [@Magiver](#): > > It’s pretty difficult, if not rude, to run away. I try to make it quick and wave as I leave. Sometimes it’s so comical you can’t get away. I saw a guy with a flat tire a year ago and just happened to have all my tools in the trunk including the jack. I jumped out with the jack and an electric drill to run the jack up and spin the nuts on/off plus I had a compressor to pump up the guy’s spare. It looked like an Indy500 tire change. vring vring vring vring vring, tire off, tire on, nuts spun on and car lowered. > > You’re pretty much stuck there listening to some thank-you’s while you put the tools away. I would have given my left nut to know you when I was driving on retreads, even tho I’m a girl. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/youre-a-roving-do-gooder-do-you-stick-around-for-thank-yous-or-go-the-lone-ranger-route/645519.md?page=2)