# You're a terrible person and you should feel bad (Confess!) **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [September 17, 2026, 12:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/youre-a-terrible-person-and-you-should-feel-bad-confess/1033147 "2026-09-17T12:55:10Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![QuickSilver](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/quicksilver/32/7832_2.png) [@QuickSilver](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/QuickSilver)\ **Post date:** [September 17, 2026, 6:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/youre-a-terrible-person-and-you-should-feel-bad-confess/1033147/41 "2026-09-17T18:24:01Z")
> [@Spice\_Weasel](#): > > Sorry. Not sorry. ---
**Author:** ![DrDeth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/b487fb/32.png) [@DrDeth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DrDeth)\ **Post date:** [September 17, 2026, 6:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/youre-a-terrible-person-and-you-should-feel-bad-confess/1033147/42 "2026-09-17T18:35:54Z")
> [@Dung\_Beetle](#): > > I don’t like babies or children. I would never hurt one, I just want them to be somewhere that I’m not. I, OTOH, like kids, but am very uncomfortable around babies- if someone tries to hand me one, I demur, I am afraid i will drop it. > [@markn\_1](#): > > I’ve mentioned this before, but I’ve seen people from Chicago claim that ketchup doesn’t belong on hot dogs because it’s too sweet, and then they smother the dog with sweet pickle relish, which has a higher sugar content than ketchup, and more of it is typically used on a dog than ketchup. I don’t buy it. The aversion to ketchup is just a dumb cultural shibboleth and has nothing to do with the taste. Naw. IMHO ketchup is fine if you are a kid. I checked- sweet pickle relish has 3 grams of sugar, catsup 4. And if you had both- too sweet. But I prefer dill pickle relish, which can be found- sometimes. However, as long as it is _your_ hot dog, go ahead and put chutney or kimchi on it. or whatever. My only use for ketchup is when they have those thick fries, (I prefer thin fries) and my choices are Malt vinegar, ketchup or tartar sauce. So I mix the vinegar with some ketchup. > [@robby](#): > > > [@Cecil Adams](#): > > > > “Behold this creature that walks like a man. It wants _ketchup_ on its _hot dog_.” > > But seriously, Cecil is right. Ketchup is much too sweet for a hot dog. It smothers the flavor. That’s fine if you’re eight years old, but for an adult? Great line. ---
**Author:** ![ricepad](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/b38774/32.png) [@ricepad](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ricepad)\ **Post date:** [September 17, 2026, 6:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/youre-a-terrible-person-and-you-should-feel-bad-confess/1033147/43 "2026-09-17T18:48:30Z")
When I’m in our backyard and I have to pee, I’ll sometimes pee through a gap in the fence into our neighbor’s yard. That neighbor is an asshole and I enjoy knowing that, come rainy season, a corner of his yard is going to smell pretty bad. ---
**Author:** ![Gatopescado](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gatopescado/32/5711_2.png) [@Gatopescado](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gatopescado)\ **Post date:** [September 17, 2026, 6:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/youre-a-terrible-person-and-you-should-feel-bad-confess/1033147/44 "2026-09-17T18:55:57Z")
I _am_ a terrible person and I _do_ feel bad, but I’m not so stupid as to tell anyone _why._ ---
**Author:** ![chela](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chela/32/21582_2.png) [@chela](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/chela)\ **Post date:** [September 17, 2026, 6:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/youre-a-terrible-person-and-you-should-feel-bad-confess/1033147/45 "2026-09-17T18:57:21Z")
Come now, you live in mix Denny’s neighborhood with the glory hole girls? ---
**Author:** ![QuickSilver](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/quicksilver/32/7832_2.png) [@QuickSilver](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/QuickSilver)\ **Post date:** [September 17, 2026, 6:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/youre-a-terrible-person-and-you-should-feel-bad-confess/1033147/46 "2026-09-17T18:59:38Z")
\*bodies in the yard. ---
**Author:** ![Yllaria](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/yllaria/32/3452_2.png) [@Yllaria](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Yllaria)\ **Post date:** [September 17, 2026, 7:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/youre-a-terrible-person-and-you-should-feel-bad-confess/1033147/47 "2026-09-17T19:06:02Z")
> [@ricepad](#): > > When I’m in our backyard and I have to pee, I’ll sometimes pee through a gap in the fence into our neighbor’s yard. That neighbor is an asshole and I enjoy knowing that, come rainy season, a corner of his yard is going to smell pretty bad. Or the grass will be very green. ---
**Author:** ![Beckdawrek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/beckdawrek/32/3647_2.png) [@Beckdawrek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beckdawrek)\ **Post date:** [September 17, 2026, 7:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/youre-a-terrible-person-and-you-should-feel-bad-confess/1033147/48 "2026-09-17T19:09:39Z")
Don’t ask. You don’t need to know the answer. Trust me. Gato is bad, bad, bad. I don’t really know anything because his views on these things are something like “when committing crimes never have a partner in crime or leave witnesses” Mums the word. Plus he tells tall tales. Really he’s nice ---
**Author:** ![markn\_1](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/f9ae1b/32.png) [@markn\_1](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/markn_1)\ **Post date:** [September 17, 2026, 7:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/youre-a-terrible-person-and-you-should-feel-bad-confess/1033147/49 "2026-09-17T19:14:33Z")
> [@DrDeth](#): > > sweet pickle relish has 3 grams of sugar, catsup 4. And if you had both- too sweet. My googling shows sweet relish is about 4 to 4.5 but of course different brands will differ somewhat. Let’s just say they’re about the same. So now the goalposts have been moved to a new claim: using BOTH is too sweet. Ok, I don’t like relish; am I fine to use ketchup if I don’t use relish? > [@DrDeth](#): > > However, as long as it is _your_ hot dog, go ahead and put chutney or kimchi on it. or whatever. Totally agree here. But a lot of people don’t accept this live and let live philosophy, and feel compelled to tell me I’m doing it wrong if I put ketchup on my hot dog. Like Cecil up above, and the people who agree with him. ---
**Author:** ![Tibby](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tibby/32/17030_2.png) [@Tibby](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tibby)\ **Post date:** [September 17, 2026, 7:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/youre-a-terrible-person-and-you-should-feel-bad-confess/1033147/50 "2026-09-17T19:22:10Z")
Sometimes I drop the F-bomb, but never in front of humans. Just the cats. In my defense, they’re tiny furry delinquents and frequently have it coming. And it’s hardly a one-way street. They say much worse about me in that smug little cat language of theirs. If dinner is five minutes late, Benny is probably calling me something obscene, Macaroni is filing a formal complaint with management, and Ollie is just yelling whatever the cat equivalent of “YOU BASTARD” is from three feet away. There are a lot of F-meows in this house. ---
**Author:** ![Chefguy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chefguy/32/138_2.png) [@Chefguy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chefguy)\ **Post date:** [September 17, 2026, 7:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/youre-a-terrible-person-and-you-should-feel-bad-confess/1033147/51 "2026-09-17T19:22:45Z")
I order pepperoni and pineapple pizza quite often. Sue me. I have never attended a funeral or a memorial service and likely never will. I find the idea ghoulish and pointless. And no, I don’t feel bad about it. However, I will expect people to wail piteously upon my passing. I don’t like babies and I refuse to hold them. They aren’t cute or cuddly; they’re just parasitic blobs that can’t talk or control bodily functions. Nor do I care for children under about the age of 10 unless they’re girls. Little boys are assholes, generally speaking, and I speak from experience. Teen girls are also assholes, so there is a narrow window of acceptance. ---
**Author:** ![xizor](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/xizor/32/102_2.png) [@xizor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/xizor)\ **Post date:** [September 17, 2026, 7:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/youre-a-terrible-person-and-you-should-feel-bad-confess/1033147/52 "2026-09-17T19:32:11Z")
I have called out sick from work when I wasn’t actually sick. ---
**Author:** ![enipla](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/54ee81/32.png) [@enipla](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/enipla)\ **Post date:** [September 17, 2026, 8:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/youre-a-terrible-person-and-you-should-feel-bad-confess/1033147/53 "2026-09-17T20:19:12Z")
> [@Dung\_Beetle](#): > > I don’t like babies or children. I would never hurt one, I just want them to be somewhere that I’m not. Give me a dog any day over youngsters. Crimes of mine - I hate fresh green beans. Out of the can only. The subtle metallic taste is great. We have a ‘Day of the Week’ clock. Analog. You can get within about an hour or so. Yes, we are retired. We do of course have real clocks. The crime is we have sent some of these to people that are not yet retired. There are some dishes that absolutely require Kraft American Cheese. I’m looking at you English Muffin, bacon, tomato and of course KAC. Brown it under the broiler just a wee bit. ---
**Author:** ![Spice\_Weasel](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spice_weasel/32/5435_2.png) [@Spice\_Weasel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spice_Weasel)\ **Post date:** [September 17, 2026, 8:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/youre-a-terrible-person-and-you-should-feel-bad-confess/1033147/54 "2026-09-17T20:47:46Z")
> [@enipla](#): > > Give me a dog any day over youngsters. Yeah, about dogs… They are really… just okay. _Flees_ ---
**Author:** ![Beckdawrek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/beckdawrek/32/3647_2.png) [@Beckdawrek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beckdawrek)\ **Post date:** [September 17, 2026, 9:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/youre-a-terrible-person-and-you-should-feel-bad-confess/1033147/55 "2026-09-17T21:27:27Z")
I like to get people fired. It’s a failing I can’t control. I don’t care what your job is, you don’t perform it adequately I will tell on you. If that gets you fired. Tough nuts. Yeah, I’m a tattletale. I will self-abuse later today. Maybe. ---
**Author:** ![Dag\_Otto](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/439d5e/32.png) [@Dag\_Otto](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dag_Otto)\ **Post date:** [September 17, 2026, 9:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/youre-a-terrible-person-and-you-should-feel-bad-confess/1033147/56 "2026-09-17T21:38:09Z")
> [@Spice\_Weasel](#): > > Flees And tics. ---
**Author:** ![Treppenwitz](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/treppenwitz/32/3445_2.png) [@Treppenwitz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Treppenwitz)\ **Post date:** [September 17, 2026, 9:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/youre-a-terrible-person-and-you-should-feel-bad-confess/1033147/57 "2026-09-17T21:39:50Z")
I’m English and I don’t drink tea. I make cheese on toast using a toaster and a microwave. Generally speaking, I can’t be arsed to read books. I haven’t read a novel in decades. j ---
**Author:** ![DrDeth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/b487fb/32.png) [@DrDeth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DrDeth)\ **Post date:** [September 17, 2026, 10:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/youre-a-terrible-person-and-you-should-feel-bad-confess/1033147/58 "2026-09-17T22:10:48Z")
> [@markn\_1](#): > > So now the goalposts have been moved to a new claim: I do not know what the claim is, but a lot of aficionados distain catsup. So do I, but you do you is what i say. ---
**Author:** ![needscoffee](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/needscoffee/32/1076_2.png) [@needscoffee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/needscoffee)\ **Post date:** [September 17, 2026, 10:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/youre-a-terrible-person-and-you-should-feel-bad-confess/1033147/59 "2026-09-17T22:34:17Z")
> [@robby](#): > > Ketchup is much too sweet for a hot dog. You’re very wrong. Ketchup helps counteract how overly salty hot dogs are. I’ve had BBQ sauce on grilled sausages and it’s delicious. Very similar idea. ---
**Author:** ![Q.Q.Switcheroo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/q.q.switcheroo/32/5713_2.png) [@Q.Q.Switcheroo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Q.Q.Switcheroo)\ **Post date:** [September 18, 2026, 12:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/youre-a-terrible-person-and-you-should-feel-bad-confess/1033147/60 "2026-09-18T00:04:25Z")
I don’t find it any more disturbing to see an animal injured or killed in a movie or TV show than to see the same thing happen to a human character. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/youre-a-terrible-person-and-you-should-feel-bad-confess/1033147.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/youre-a-terrible-person-and-you-should-feel-bad-confess/1033147.md?page=4)