# You're in a desert, walking along in the sand, when all of a sudden you look down... **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [June 3, 2011, 9:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/youre-in-a-desert-walking-along-in-the-sand-when-all-of-a-sudden-you-look-down/584246 "2011-06-03T21:27:46Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![panache45](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/panache45/32/64_2.png) [@panache45](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/panache45)\ **Post date:** [June 4, 2011, 12:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/youre-in-a-desert-walking-along-in-the-sand-when-all-of-a-sudden-you-look-down/584246/41 "2011-06-04T12:55:56Z")
This thread really tortoise a few things. ---
**Author:** ![Polycarp](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/82dd89/32.png) [@Polycarp](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Polycarp)\ **Post date:** [June 4, 2011, 2:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/youre-in-a-desert-walking-along-in-the-sand-when-all-of-a-sudden-you-look-down/584246/42 "2011-06-04T14:55:40Z")
> [@Sampiro](#): > > The tortoise killed my daddy. Turning him on his back in the dry hot sun is the closest you can get to waterboarding him. It was a six-fingered tortoise? :o ---
**Author:** ![Freudian\_Slit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/5daacb/32.png) [@Freudian\_Slit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Freudian_Slit)\ **Post date:** [June 4, 2011, 3:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/youre-in-a-desert-walking-along-in-the-sand-when-all-of-a-sudden-you-look-down/584246/43 "2011-06-04T15:08:40Z")
He’s Yertle! ---
**Author:** ![Jackmannii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jackmannii/32/311_2.png) [@Jackmannii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jackmannii)\ **Post date:** [June 4, 2011, 3:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/youre-in-a-desert-walking-along-in-the-sand-when-all-of-a-sudden-you-look-down/584246/44 "2011-06-04T15:31:09Z")
Oh, let me think, let me think, what can I do? Oh no Oh no Oh no no no no no ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [June 4, 2011, 5:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/youre-in-a-desert-walking-along-in-the-sand-when-all-of-a-sudden-you-look-down/584246/45 "2011-06-04T17:18:10Z")
> [@Turek](#): > > I was too busy daydreaming about unicorns to notice the tortoise. I see what you did there. Here, have an origami unicorn. ---
**Author:** ![Marlitharn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/779978/32.png) [@Marlitharn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Marlitharn)\ **Post date:** [June 4, 2011, 6:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/youre-in-a-desert-walking-along-in-the-sand-when-all-of-a-sudden-you-look-down/584246/46 "2011-06-04T18:13:49Z")
I flipped a tortoise in Reno just to watch it die. ---
**Author:** ![flodnak](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/838e76/32.png) [@flodnak](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/flodnak)\ **Post date:** [June 4, 2011, 6:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/youre-in-a-desert-walking-along-in-the-sand-when-all-of-a-sudden-you-look-down/584246/47 "2011-06-04T18:30:33Z")
> [@samjones](#): > > Close. > > The correct answer is: “What desert?” And the correct question is “_Which_ end?” ---
**Author:** ![Sr\_Siete](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/6de8d8/32.png) [@Sr\_Siete](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sr_Siete)\ **Post date:** [June 4, 2011, 6:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/youre-in-a-desert-walking-along-in-the-sand-when-all-of-a-sudden-you-look-down/584246/48 "2011-06-04T18:45:35Z")
It’s obvious, my name is Achilles, and according to my buddy Zeno, if I allow the damn thing to get ahead of me I’ll never get anywhere. Don’t ask me why, I’m a warrior. This sort of thinking gives me a headache. ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [June 4, 2011, 7:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/youre-in-a-desert-walking-along-in-the-sand-when-all-of-a-sudden-you-look-down/584246/49 "2011-06-04T19:09:23Z")
Yertle, is that you? ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [June 4, 2011, 11:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/youre-in-a-desert-walking-along-in-the-sand-when-all-of-a-sudden-you-look-down/584246/50 "2011-06-04T23:47:02Z")
Because it just wouldn’t slow down, dammit. ---
**Author:** ![xkit0katx](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/x/50afbb/32.png) [@xkit0katx](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/xkit0katx)\ **Post date:** [June 5, 2011, 12:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/youre-in-a-desert-walking-along-in-the-sand-when-all-of-a-sudden-you-look-down/584246/51 "2011-06-05T00:51:31Z")
It was a blue tortoise ---
**Author:** ![cmyk](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cmyk/32/3353_2.png) [@cmyk](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cmyk)\ **Post date:** [June 5, 2011, 1:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/youre-in-a-desert-walking-along-in-the-sand-when-all-of-a-sudden-you-look-down/584246/52 "2011-06-05T01:10:31Z")
I’ve seen things you people wouldn’t believe. Attack ships on fire off the shoulder of Orion. I watched c-beams glitter in the dark near the Tanhauser Gate. Tortoises, flipped over, dead on their backs. All those moments will be lost in time, like tears in rain. Time to die. ---
**Author:** ![Lukeinva](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lukeinva/32/17872_2.png) [@Lukeinva](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lukeinva)\ **Post date:** [June 5, 2011, 1:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/youre-in-a-desert-walking-along-in-the-sand-when-all-of-a-sudden-you-look-down/584246/53 "2011-06-05T01:43:56Z")
You all failed to realize that there is not going to be a tortoise in the middle of the desert. It’s a trick question. ---
**Author:** ![Tangent](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tangent/32/3098_2.png) [@Tangent](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tangent)\ **Post date:** [June 5, 2011, 1:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/youre-in-a-desert-walking-along-in-the-sand-when-all-of-a-sudden-you-look-down/584246/54 "2011-06-05T01:45:08Z")
The tortoise is the boy’s _ **mother** _. ---
**Author:** ![Miss\_Woodhouse](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/838e76/32.png) [@Miss\_Woodhouse](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Miss_Woodhouse)\ **Post date:** [June 5, 2011, 2:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/youre-in-a-desert-walking-along-in-the-sand-when-all-of-a-sudden-you-look-down/584246/55 "2011-06-05T02:05:02Z")
Because I’m testing the tortoise for divinity. A real tortoise could turn itself over by itself. I’ve seen them do it a number of times. It’s quite a neat trick. Only a silly small god without any common sense could not turn itself over. Ergo: turtle can’t turn=small god=anything I want if I wait long enough (and if I go find him a few followers so he has the power to do some granting.) ---
**Author:** ![Zebra](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/c0e974/32.png) [@Zebra](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zebra)\ **Post date:** [June 5, 2011, 9:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/youre-in-a-desert-walking-along-in-the-sand-when-all-of-a-sudden-you-look-down/584246/56 "2011-06-05T09:17:00Z")
You’re the one telling the story, you tell me why I’m not flipping it back over. ---
**Author:** ![Sr\_Siete](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/6de8d8/32.png) [@Sr\_Siete](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sr_Siete)\ **Post date:** [June 5, 2011, 9:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/youre-in-a-desert-walking-along-in-the-sand-when-all-of-a-sudden-you-look-down/584246/57 "2011-06-05T09:32:17Z")
Let me try a serious answer. Somebody wrote something on the tortoise’s belly? Like instructions to get to the nearest oasis? Is there something special at all about the tortoise? ---
**Author:** ![Alessan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/alessan/32/465_2.png) [@Alessan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Alessan)\ **Post date:** [June 5, 2011, 9:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/youre-in-a-desert-walking-along-in-the-sand-when-all-of-a-sudden-you-look-down/584246/58 "2011-06-05T09:42:57Z")
The tortoise hasn’t been flipped over; the desert has. ---
**Author:** ![PunditLisa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/4af34b/32.png) [@PunditLisa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PunditLisa)\ **Post date:** [June 5, 2011, 10:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/youre-in-a-desert-walking-along-in-the-sand-when-all-of-a-sudden-you-look-down/584246/59 "2011-06-05T10:53:28Z")
Cause I put a ten spot on the hare. ---
**Author:** ![Turek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/turek/32/18782_2.png) [@Turek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Turek)\ **Post date:** [June 5, 2011, 11:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/youre-in-a-desert-walking-along-in-the-sand-when-all-of-a-sudden-you-look-down/584246/60 "2011-06-05T11:25:13Z")
> [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](#): > > I see what you did there. Here, have an origami unicorn. Thanks. How’re your folks? [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/youre-in-a-desert-walking-along-in-the-sand-when-all-of-a-sudden-you-look-down/584246.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/youre-in-a-desert-walking-along-in-the-sand-when-all-of-a-sudden-you-look-down/584246.md?page=4)