# You're in denial that you knocked her up **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [August 2, 2010, 8:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/youre-in-denial-that-you-knocked-her-up/548866 "2010-08-02T08:10:39Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 6
**Author:** ![AClockworkMelon](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/aclockworkmelon/32/10803_2.png) [@AClockworkMelon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AClockworkMelon)\ **Post date:** [August 3, 2010, 8:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/youre-in-denial-that-you-knocked-her-up/548866/101 "2010-08-03T20:47:15Z")
> [@Shot\_From\_Guns](#): > > That… doesn’t sound right at all. Haha, no, I guess it doesn’t. > [@Dante](#): > > Your penis makes me sad. That’s how it’s always been for me so I’ve never known anything else. I can’t miss what I’ve never had. 🙂 > [@Ferret\_Herder](#): > > **ACM** , You might want to Google (on a non-work computer) anything Dan Savage (of the Savage Love advice column) has to say about the “death grip.” Gives a whole new meaning to ‘choking your chicken’! ---
**Author:** ![Eonwe](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/eonwe/32/240_2.png) [@Eonwe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eonwe)\ **Post date:** [August 3, 2010, 11:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/youre-in-denial-that-you-knocked-her-up/548866/102 "2010-08-03T23:01:21Z")
> [@Una\_Persson](#): > > > [@kasuo](#): > > > > His retort: “dude what’s wrong with you? You sound like a chick” > > One of the life-lessons I’ve learned is that anyone who uses a “you sound like a chick” or “you sound like a dude” as an insult or jibe is not only an immature little asshole, but potentially a hazardous person to be around. Yes, as usually what that translates into in real-world meaning is, “you are letting smarts and common sense override gender-role-based buffonery.” ---
**Author:** ![Lynn\_Bodoni](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/e47c2d/32.png) [@Lynn\_Bodoni](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lynn_Bodoni)\ **Post date:** [August 4, 2010, 2:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/youre-in-denial-that-you-knocked-her-up/548866/103 "2010-08-04T02:38:20Z")
> [@](#): > > I always thought that vasectomies were reversible- I’ve even toyed with the idea of a fantasy world where all men are given vasectomies at puberty (or at birth, if it’s possible) and they have to petition to get it reversed when they’re ready to reproduce. In MY fantasy world, when a boy is able to give a couple of sperm samples, he does so, which are then frozen in about six batches. He (or his family) is responsible for paying for storage. This doesn’t solve the problem of STDs, but it DOES solve the problem of accidental pregnancies. I have no idea of the price of sperm storage, but surely it can’t be that much. ---
**Author:** ![supergoose](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/aeb1de/32.png) [@supergoose](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/supergoose)\ **Post date:** [August 4, 2010, 2:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/youre-in-denial-that-you-knocked-her-up/548866/104 "2010-08-04T02:48:06Z")
Ah but then, if when trying to conceive, he and his partner ran through all the sperm with no success, he wouldn’t be able to produce more. Lawsuits aplenty. ---
**Author:** ![Thudlow\_Boink](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/thudlow_boink/32/320_2.png) [@Thudlow\_Boink](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Thudlow_Boink)\ **Post date:** [August 4, 2010, 3:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/youre-in-denial-that-you-knocked-her-up/548866/105 "2010-08-04T03:21:39Z")
If it’s a fantasy world anyway, why can’t boys (and girls) just be taught a sense of responsibility? ---
**Author:** ![YogSothoth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/y/8edcca/32.png) [@YogSothoth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/YogSothoth)\ **Post date:** [August 4, 2010, 6:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/youre-in-denial-that-you-knocked-her-up/548866/106 "2010-08-04T06:12:28Z")
How long would it take to get him to take that paternity test? I want to know the end of this story! ---
**Author:** ![kasuo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/8c91f0/32.png) [@kasuo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kasuo)\ **Post date:** [August 4, 2010, 6:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/youre-in-denial-that-you-knocked-her-up/548866/107 "2010-08-04T06:18:01Z")
> [@YogSosoth](#): > > How long would it take to get him to take that paternity test? I want to know the end of this story! Good question. I’m eager to know as well. I’ll post a follow-up, assuming I’d even bother staying in contact. ---
**Author:** ![Malacandra](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@Malacandra](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Malacandra)\ **Post date:** [August 4, 2010, 7:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/youre-in-denial-that-you-knocked-her-up/548866/108 "2010-08-04T07:22:09Z")
> [@Thudlow\_Boink](#): > > If it’s a fantasy world anyway, why can’t boys (and girls) just be taught a sense of responsibility? Because fantasising about forcing all males to undergo surgery as soon as they’re of fertile age is so much more satisfying, silly! ---
**Author:** ![AClockworkMelon](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/aclockworkmelon/32/10803_2.png) [@AClockworkMelon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AClockworkMelon)\ **Post date:** [August 4, 2010, 8:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/youre-in-denial-that-you-knocked-her-up/548866/109 "2010-08-04T08:14:29Z")
> [@Thudlow\_Boink](#): > > If it’s a fantasy world anyway, why can’t boys (and girls) just be taught a sense of responsibility? Because that premise is impossible. ---
**Author:** ![Freudian\_Slit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/5daacb/32.png) [@Freudian\_Slit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Freudian_Slit)\ **Post date:** [August 4, 2010, 8:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/youre-in-denial-that-you-knocked-her-up/548866/110 "2010-08-04T08:24:47Z")
> [@AClockworkMelon](#): > > Male here: I don’t notice the difference between condom and no condom. I don’t think it’s all that weird (or the head of the penis/oral sex thing you mentioned either). I’m female and during sex, I can’t tell when someone (even without a condom) is ejaculating me. Sometimes the little pulsations of the penis make me think that the guy is coming but the actual cum doesn’t feel like anything to me. ---
**Author:** ![Broomstick](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/broomstick/32/246_2.png) [@Broomstick](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Broomstick)\ **Post date:** [August 4, 2010, 12:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/youre-in-denial-that-you-knocked-her-up/548866/111 "2010-08-04T12:21:50Z")
> [@AClockworkMelon](#): > > I always thought that vasectomies were reversible In theory, yes, but in practice the results are not so good. And the longer the period of time since the vasectomy the more likely the body has started destroying its own sperm in an auto-immune reaction. If that has occurred it doesn’t matter if you’ve reconnected the plumbing, there are no longer any tadpoles. Have a [wiki](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Vasectomy_reversal) on the topic. ---
**Author:** ![johnpost](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/f17d59/32.png) [@johnpost](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/johnpost)\ **Post date:** [August 4, 2010, 1:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/youre-in-denial-that-you-knocked-her-up/548866/112 "2010-08-04T13:30:28Z")
> [@AClockworkMelon](#): > > I always thought that vasectomies were reversible there was at some time someone experimenting with a valve vasectomy. i wouldn’t want to risk a leak myself. seems smarter to make a bucket of frozen sperm and get snipped for permanent. ---
**Author:** ![furlibusea](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/aca169/32.png) [@furlibusea](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/furlibusea)\ **Post date:** [August 4, 2010, 1:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/youre-in-denial-that-you-knocked-her-up/548866/113 "2010-08-04T13:51:58Z")
> [@Acantha](#): > > Or she was on birth control that failed. 2 methods are always better than 1. Shit happens. > > The fact is, if you have sex, kids can happen. Even if your tubes are tied or you’ve had a vasectomy. Even if you’ve been proclaimed ‘sterile’ by a doctor. There are a million different scenarios. > > / snip/ > > Nobody who is old enough to have sex should ever assume someone else is telling the truth or knows with 100% certainty when they tell them they are on birth control or they are sterile because ‘miracles’ happen and birth control fails. > > If you aren’t ready to deal with the consequences of an unintended pregnancy without calling your partner a whore and accusing her of sleeping around, you aren’t mature enough to have a sex life. If you aren’t ready to take precautions to prevent unwanted pregnancies and think they just happen to other people, you aren’t mature enough to have a sex life. The end. God I wish I could make a poster of this for my classroom wall. ---
**Author:** ![Shot\_From\_Guns](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ccd318/32.png) [@Shot\_From\_Guns](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shot_From_Guns)\ **Post date:** [August 4, 2010, 2:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/youre-in-denial-that-you-knocked-her-up/548866/114 "2010-08-04T14:12:25Z")
> [@Freudian\_Slit](#): > > I’m female and during sex, I can’t tell when someone (even without a condom) is ejaculating me. Sometimes the little pulsations of the penis make me think that the guy is coming but the actual cum doesn’t feel like anything to me. False equivalence. Him not having much sensitivity on the head of his penis would be like you not feeling what someone’s doing to your _clitoris_–not what’s happening several inches up your vagina. IIRC, you don’t have that many nerves up where someone would probably be ejaculating. ETA: “Pulsations of the penis” would be a great something. User name? Album title? ---
**Author:** ![Freudian\_Slit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/5daacb/32.png) [@Freudian\_Slit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Freudian_Slit)\ **Post date:** [August 4, 2010, 3:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/youre-in-denial-that-you-knocked-her-up/548866/115 "2010-08-04T15:46:43Z")
Well, I didn’t mean that it was exactly the same, just that I’m not that sensitive in certain areas either, and I’ve gotten weird/incredulous reactions, too. ---
**Author:** ![Shot\_From\_Guns](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ccd318/32.png) [@Shot\_From\_Guns](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shot_From_Guns)\ **Post date:** [August 4, 2010, 4:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/youre-in-denial-that-you-knocked-her-up/548866/116 "2010-08-04T16:01:38Z")
Well, there’s normal range of sensation… and then there’s not being able to feel much on an area of your body that should be packed with nerves. Sometimes incredulous reactions are justified. 😛 ---
**Author:** ![digs](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/digs/32/14889_2.png) [@digs](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/digs)\ **Post date:** [August 12, 2010, 4:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/youre-in-denial-that-you-knocked-her-up/548866/117 "2010-08-12T04:52:05Z")
> [@kasuo](#): > > … > Earlier today, he sent me a message asking why I wasn’t chatting with him as much as before. I told him it bothered me that he acted as though nothing was wrong, especially given that there children now involved. His retort: “dude what’s wrong with you? You sound like a chick” I respect that you’re “chatting” less. That’s healthy. And “sounding like a chick” is a good thing. So why are you still involved in this trainwreck of a soap opera? Do you not have enough jerks in your life? If this guy is a douche to her, he WILL be a douche to you… when you least expect it, and most need him. Walk away, man. ---
**Author:** ![EvilTOJ](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/ee59a6/32.png) [@EvilTOJ](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/EvilTOJ)\ **Post date:** [August 12, 2010, 9:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/youre-in-denial-that-you-knocked-her-up/548866/118 "2010-08-12T09:29:55Z")
OK people are being way too angry in this thread. I’m going to pass around some booze, chocolates, and cats until everyone chills the fuck out and is happy. Aaaand I just noticed this is the Pit. I don’t care, I’m handing them out anyway! ---
**Author:** ![digs](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/digs/32/14889_2.png) [@digs](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/digs)\ **Post date:** [August 12, 2010, 2:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/youre-in-denial-that-you-knocked-her-up/548866/119 "2010-08-12T14:46:51Z")
Mmm… this kitten is sofffft. And so is the single malt Scotch… keep passin’ the bonbons, duuuuude… Thanks, Not-So-EvilTOJ. ---
**Author:** ![kasuo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/8c91f0/32.png) [@kasuo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kasuo)\ **Post date:** [August 12, 2010, 5:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/youre-in-denial-that-you-knocked-her-up/548866/120 "2010-08-12T17:47:43Z")
> [@digs](#): > > I respect that you’re “chatting” less. That’s healthy. And “sounding like a chick” is a good thing. So why are you still involved in this trainwreck of a soap opera? > > Do you not have enough jerks in your life? If this guy is a douche to her, he WILL be a douche to you… when you least expect it, and most need him. My involvement is near nil now. The last time we chatted was what was mentioned in the OP. I’m curious to see how this turns out. As for jerks in my life, I’ve been cutting off ties with several people. It may come off as cold and methodical but I’ve been analysing my relationships with people using SWOT and it’s slowly helping me shed a lot of crap I used to put up with. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/youre-in-denial-that-you-knocked-her-up/548866.md?page=5) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/youre-in-denial-that-you-knocked-her-up/548866.md?page=7)