# You're naming your baby what!
**URL:** https://boards.straightdope.com/t/youre-naming-your-baby-what/277202
**Category:** The BBQ Pit
**Created:** [November 29, 2004, 8:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/youre-naming-your-baby-what/277202 "2004-11-29T20:06:55Z")
**Posts on this page:** 20
**Page:** 2
### Author:  [@LilyoftheValley](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LilyoftheValley)
#### Post date: [November 29, 2004, 8:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/youre-naming-your-baby-what/277202/21 "2004-11-29T20:38:30Z")
Whoops.
I forgot “Briggs”. I wonder what his personality type is?
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### Author:  [@TellMeI\_mNotCrazy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TellMeI_mNotCrazy)
#### Post date: [November 29, 2004, 8:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/youre-naming-your-baby-what/277202/22 "2004-11-29T20:46:02Z")
> [@EJsGirl](#):
>
> Julia Roberts just named her twins Hazel (love it!) and Phinneaus (um, holy shit).
When I saw just the thread title, I thought it was going to be about Julia Roberts naming her kid Phinneaus.
Oh well, it’s still better than Apple. Or Rumer. or Moonunit.
Maybe she’s gonna take him around the world in 80 days?
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### Author:  [@LilyoftheValley](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LilyoftheValley)
#### Post date: [November 29, 2004, 8:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/youre-naming-your-baby-what/277202/23 "2004-11-29T20:46:47Z")
> [@EJsGirl](#):
>
> But the cake-taker is Spitfire, my friend’s niece.
Does Spitfire have a little brother?
“Bane” was born August 4, 2004. Is there anyone out there who will defend this name?
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### Author:  [@Cinnamon\_Girl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cinnamon_Girl)
#### Post date: [November 29, 2004, 8:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/youre-naming-your-baby-what/277202/24 "2004-11-29T20:47:19Z")
> [@LilyoftheValley](#):
>
> I’m sure that the parents of “Jaxon” thought the spelling was very clever. But all I can think of when I see his name is “Jaxon, Jaxoff”.
BWAAAAHAAA! 😃 I should know better than to eat and drink when I dope.
I kind of like Acacia as an alternative to oh-so-common Savannah. Acacia is a [well-recognized tree](http://www.blueplanetbiomes.org/acacia_tortillis.htm) found on the African, say it with me, savannah.
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### Author:  [@Cinnamon\_Girl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cinnamon_Girl)
#### Post date: [November 29, 2004, 8:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/youre-naming-your-baby-what/277202/25 "2004-11-29T20:49:57Z")
> [@LilyoftheValley](#):
>
> “Bane” was born August 4, 2004. Is there anyone out there who will defend this name?
He must have been an accident considering that he is the Bane of his Parents’ Existence.
:: sorry, you had to know that was coming ::
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### Author:  [@Metacom](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Metacom)
#### Post date: [November 29, 2004, 9:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/youre-naming-your-baby-what/277202/26 "2004-11-29T21:02:51Z")
> [@AuntiePam](#):
>
> Dagen
Well, if the family name is “Has,” that strikes me as a fine name.
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### Author:  [@stpauler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/stpauler)
#### Post date: [November 29, 2004, 9:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/youre-naming-your-baby-what/277202/27 "2004-11-29T21:04:13Z")
I had to call a client back regarding a couple claimants. I didn’t know until I was on the phone with the client that one of the names was “Donald Dick”. I was sweating from trying to hold in my snickers. I kept picturing Disney™ porn.
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### Author:  [@pepperlandgirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pepperlandgirl)
#### Post date: [November 29, 2004, 9:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/youre-naming-your-baby-what/277202/28 "2004-11-29T21:04:25Z")
There’s a young lady in my class named **Knewenle** , pronounced New-Winnie. Her mother’s name is **Gblormehn** , I have no idea how that is pronounced. I looked on [babynames.com](http://babynames.com) for clues, but I got nothing.
Hmmm, one name that strikes me as odd is **Jaycie**. I have no idea where this came from, but some 20 years ago, my mom named my younger sister **Jasie**. I’m sure people on this thread would scoff at such a ridiculous name (IRC, mom would have named her Chase if she was a boy, and somehow Chase became Jasie…), but I think that it fits my sister’s personality perfectly. Odd, offbeat, and unique in a weird way…just like her.
P.S. “Haley” is still the most beautiful name ever.
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### Author:  [@NicePete](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/NicePete)
#### Post date: [November 29, 2004, 9:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/youre-naming-your-baby-what/277202/29 "2004-11-29T21:07:41Z")
> [@LilyoftheValley](#):
>
> Whoops.
>
> I forgot “Briggs”. I wonder what his personality type is?
Nah, he has a little brother named “Stratton”.
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### Author:  [@yBeayf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/yBeayf)
#### Post date: [November 29, 2004, 9:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/youre-naming-your-baby-what/277202/30 "2004-11-29T21:15:03Z")
> [@](#):
>
> There’s a young lady in my class named Knewenle, pronounced New-Winnie. Her mother’s name is Gblormehn, I have no idea how that is pronounced. I looked on [babynames.com](http://babynames.com) for clues, but I got nothing.
Those almost sound like they may be names from some little-known ethnic group (from the Caucasus, maybe?), possibly with the pronunciation changed so English speakers have a hope of pronouncing them.
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### Author:  [@pepperlandgirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pepperlandgirl)
#### Post date: [November 29, 2004, 9:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/youre-naming-your-baby-what/277202/31 "2004-11-29T21:20:00Z")
> [@yBeayf](#):
>
> Those almost sound like they may be names from some little-known ethnic group (from the Caucasus, maybe?), possibly with the pronunciation changed so English speakers have a hope of pronouncing them.
That’s kind of what I thought. I don’t know her very well and I’ve love to ask how/where she got her name, but I didn’t know if that would be rude…
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### Author:  [@yBeayf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/yBeayf)
#### Post date: [November 29, 2004, 9:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/youre-naming-your-baby-what/277202/32 "2004-11-29T21:23:26Z")
Aha! [Gblormehn](http://www.tlcafrica.com/african_names_liberia.htm), at least, is a Kpelle name from Liberia, Guinea, or Côte d’Ivoire.
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### Author:  [@Captain\_Roscoe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Captain_Roscoe)
#### Post date: [November 29, 2004, 9:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/youre-naming-your-baby-what/277202/33 "2004-11-29T21:27:14Z")
> [@AuntiePam](#):
>
> Damian (oh no, he won’t get teased)
Maybe it’s because the film is ten years older than me, or because I’m English, but I have lots of friends called **Damian** , or **Damien** - and the film reference is never thought of. I quite like the name personally, although I agree that some of the names on your list and throughout this thread are truly horrendous.
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### Author:  [@GillianBoardman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GillianBoardman)
#### Post date: [November 29, 2004, 9:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/youre-naming-your-baby-what/277202/34 "2004-11-29T21:35:08Z")
Since I’ve joined the dope there have been at least 3 of these threads. Why does anybody care what other people name their children? Now, I personally know a Billie Jo who was named for the Petticoat Junction show, and admittedly my first thought was, “Does her mother not like her?”, but that had to do with the stupidity of the show. I can’t imagine **wanting** my child to sound like a hillbilly. As for names that don’t indicate gender, that’s frequently purposeful. Some of us would like our daughters to be able to send in a resume that won’t be pre-judged by gender. I’ll ask my daughter, Morgan, to let us know if it works. It’s the jokey names that get me, like my poor friend Billie, or people who try to pun with the last name, or families that have names that all begin with the same letter, (and that almost happened with my kids, accidently…fortunately I avoided it, see Morgan, above!) because that just seems cruel. Much more cruel than a name that seems strange to adult ears, but which I think today’s kids don’t even blink at.
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### Author:  [@AuntiePam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AuntiePam)
#### Post date: [November 29, 2004, 9:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/youre-naming-your-baby-what/277202/35 "2004-11-29T21:35:09Z")
> [@Inigo Montoya](#):
>
> My point is, few names carry their original meanings any more–so why should we limit ourselves to to one list of meaningless names when we can also just make stuff up?
Good point.
I left out the names that were unusual but familiar, names I’ve seen in books set in Russia, Africa, India, Japan.
Maybe the new names (if they are indeed new) are a backlash from parents who went through life surrounded by other Brittanys and Judys and Michaels and Heathers.
I feel better now. Guess I just needed to get some perspective.
And yes, **Haley** is truly a beautiful name. 🙂
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### Author:  [@Stoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Stoid)
#### Post date: [November 29, 2004, 9:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/youre-naming-your-baby-what/277202/36 "2004-11-29T21:43:02Z")
> [@AuntiePam](#):
>
> But why do new parents do this to their kids? What’s the matter with a name that actually means something, like a family name, or something that reflects the child’s heritage?
>
> Why do parents do this? Their child’s gonna be plenty special without having to go through life with a name that no one can spell or pronounce, and that doesn’t identify you as male or female.
Seems to me this is your issue, and as such, you should name your kids John and Jane.
My name is rather unusual. It was common a hundred years ago, but it’s exceedingly rare now, and people misspell and mispronounce it 9 out of 10 times. I don’t care. I love my name, I love that it is rare, I love not being common. It was a little difficult when I was a child, but being a child was a small percentage of my life, apercentage that shrinks daily, so I’m very glad my parents didn’t make their decision based on that.
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### Author:  [@Stoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Stoid)
#### Post date: [November 29, 2004, 9:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/youre-naming-your-baby-what/277202/37 "2004-11-29T21:44:09Z")
Oh, and they also mistake my gender about 60% of the time. My deep voice doesn’t help. I don’t care abou that, either.
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### Author:  [@Shirley\_Ujest](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shirley_Ujest)
#### Post date: [November 29, 2004, 9:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/youre-naming-your-baby-what/277202/38 "2004-11-29T21:44:27Z")
> [@TellMeI'mNotCrazy](#):
>
> When I saw just the thread title, I thought it was going to be about Julia Roberts naming her kid Phinneaus.
>
> Oh well, it’s still better than Apple. Or Rumer. or Moonunit.
>
> Maybe she’s gonna take him around the world in 80 days?
I love **Phinneaus** and I don’t mind **Hazel**.
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### Author:  [@AuntiePam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AuntiePam)
#### Post date: [November 29, 2004, 9:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/youre-naming-your-baby-what/277202/39 "2004-11-29T21:49:19Z")
> [@Stoid](#):
>
> Seems to me this is your issue, and as such, you should name your kids John and Jane.
True.
My question wasn’t completely rhetorical though. I’d be interested to know if the parents’ names were common or unusual and how they came up with the new name.
Two of my best friends at school were named Jerrilea and Jalois (this was in the 50’s, when nobody wanted to be “different”), and they hated their names.
Is that it, maybe? We’ve gone from wanting to conform to wanting to stand out?
I dunno. I just think it’s interesting, that made-up names are so predominant.
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### Author:  [@Hamlet](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hamlet)
#### Post date: [November 29, 2004, 9:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/youre-naming-your-baby-what/277202/40 "2004-11-29T21:59:12Z")
> [@AuntiePam](#):
>
> I dunno. I just think it’s interesting, that made-up names are so predominant.
Give me made-up names over consumeristic marketing names anyday. I can live with parents naming their kids Kaden and Mattison, but the ones who name their kid Lexus or Armani should be sterilized.
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