# You've Passed On, I'm your next of kin, what will I find in your house?

**URL:** https://boards.straightdope.com/t/youve-passed-on-im-your-next-of-kin-what-will-i-find-in-your-house/141616
**Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share
**Created:** [December 9, 2002, 9:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/youve-passed-on-im-your-next-of-kin-what-will-i-find-in-your-house/141616 "2002-12-09T21:42:38Z")
**Posts on this page:** 20
**Page:** 2

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### Author: ![Q.N.Jones](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/q/3da27b/32.png) [@Q.N.Jones](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Q.N.Jones)
#### Post date: [December 10, 2002, 5:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/youve-passed-on-im-your-next-of-kin-what-will-i-find-in-your-house/141616/21 "2002-12-10T05:41:36Z")

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Well, my dildo sits out on the top of my bedside table. That’s pretty embarrassing right there. I have a vibrator too, but I don’t know if they’d know what it was–it’s one of Hitachi Magic Wand types, except it’s by Dr. Scholl’s. They’d probably think it was for my feet. Not that it would matter, what with the dildo on the nightstand and all.

And there’s a bunch of embarrassing erotica/romance that I’ve written that’s on my hard drive. My dad’s the snoop, and he’s the one who’d probably find it. He’s also the one I’d least like to have read it. Really, I consider this much more embarrassing than the dildo.

That’s about it, really. Except for the giant dust bunnies under my bed.

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### Author: ![happyheathen](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/b5e925/32.png) [@happyheathen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/happyheathen)
#### Post date: [December 10, 2002, 5:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/youve-passed-on-im-your-next-of-kin-what-will-i-find-in-your-house/141616/22 "2002-12-10T05:45:14Z")

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Enough unidentifiable stuff to call in the hazmat folks.

(only some of it is lethal 🙂 )

[sub]for now…[/sub]

and model-building stuff, photo stuff, video stuff, PC parts, model “A” Ford parts, airplane parts, SCUBA gear (I can’t swim), and more tools than most people can identify…

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### Author: ![LadyMack](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/4491bb/32.png) [@LadyMack](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LadyMack)
#### Post date: [December 10, 2002, 6:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/youve-passed-on-im-your-next-of-kin-what-will-i-find-in-your-house/141616/23 "2002-12-10T06:08:05Z")

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> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by Triskadecamus \*  
> \*\*
> 
> Hell, I’ll give it to you now! Of course you have to understand the significance of the tape. I received it from a good friend, as a gift. She, in turn had received it as a gift, from an ex boyfriend, who had himself gotten it as a gift from a relative. On it’s third round as a mathom, and still in pristine shrink-wrap!
> 
> Email me if you really want this thing, knowing it has become as much a memorial as anything else.
> 
> Tris \*\*

**incoming**

“My name is Mack, and I am a Yanni-holic. This, (and other things…):D, has caused me to be the subject of scorn and pity, for much of my life.  
I’ve tried everything. Finally, I have come to the sad conclusion, that the only way to deal with this personal agony…is to overdose.”

:eek:

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### Author: ![amarinth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/3be4f8/32.png) [@amarinth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/amarinth)
#### Post date: [December 10, 2002, 6:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/youve-passed-on-im-your-next-of-kin-what-will-i-find-in-your-house/141616/24 "2002-12-10T06:11:22Z")

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This is why I can’t ever die.

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### Author: ![ultress](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/7c8e57/32.png) [@ultress](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ultress)
#### Post date: [December 10, 2002, 12:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/youve-passed-on-im-your-next-of-kin-what-will-i-find-in-your-house/141616/25 "2002-12-10T12:39:02Z")

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The best bet for my next of kin (my son) would be to either just burn the house down, or get a bulldozer in once he starts throwing stuff out. I’m a packrat.

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### Author: ![Alexxandra](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/278dde/32.png) [@Alexxandra](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Alexxandra)
#### Post date: [December 10, 2002, 3:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/youve-passed-on-im-your-next-of-kin-what-will-i-find-in-your-house/141616/26 "2002-12-10T15:43:21Z")

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I’m a packrat, too. I feel for the poor soul who has to go through all my crap once I’m gone. My porn collection and vibrators would raise an eyebrow or two, I’m sure. More the type of porn than the amount, though I habe been downloading quite a bit lately.

Alexx

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### Author: ![Ethilrist](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ethilrist/32/4604_2.png) [@Ethilrist](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ethilrist)
#### Post date: [December 10, 2002, 4:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/youve-passed-on-im-your-next-of-kin-what-will-i-find-in-your-house/141616/27 "2002-12-10T16:03:36Z")

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> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by Zoe \*  
> The diary I kept in high school wherein I described my eternal love for John, Mike, Jerry, James, George, Jeff, another Mike, another John, **a cousin,** …

Gee, I hope he comes to the funeral… Now _THAT_ would be an awkward moment for whoever found the diary…

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### Author: ![CRorex](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/dfb087/32.png) [@CRorex](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CRorex)
#### Post date: [December 10, 2002, 4:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/youve-passed-on-im-your-next-of-kin-what-will-i-find-in-your-house/141616/28 "2002-12-10T16:46:19Z")

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Hrrm a halbard, a pair of katanas and a longsword… with books on biochemistry and virology… a long bow.

The ‘shelf’. The shelf refers to all of the notebooks I have crammed full of weapon designs, synthesis pathways for ALL types of nasty chemicals. Notes on various microbial DNA recombinations that would be fun to try. 3 or 4 detailing the full biology (from genomic material up to full organism w/ life cycle and behaviour and social structure) of various critters I use in my writing. And a dozen books, with maps for plans of various hostage taking, snatch and grab, assassinations and what not for other stories I’m working on.

Oh don’t forget the sketches of various creatures from nightmares I’ve had… use for OTHER stories.

The books on cabaltism, black magic and more mainstream religious texts.

My “cough” video collection.

It’s not pornographic, just very very strange.

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### Author: ![booklover](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/85f322/32.png) [@booklover](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/booklover)
#### Post date: [December 10, 2002, 8:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/youve-passed-on-im-your-next-of-kin-what-will-i-find-in-your-house/141616/29 "2002-12-10T20:12:04Z")

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Aside from the normal packrat stuff, I have an obsession with gymnastics and have tons of back issues of magazines, videos of competitions, etc…however, I did learn that someone on a gymnastics message board has over 900 videos, so I don’t feel quite as strange as I used to.

The old, half-filled diaries and journals should probably just be burned, as I’d hate to have anyone read them. _shudder_

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### Author: ![Flowerchild](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/858c86/32.png) [@Flowerchild](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Flowerchild)
#### Post date: [December 10, 2002, 9:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/youve-passed-on-im-your-next-of-kin-what-will-i-find-in-your-house/141616/30 "2002-12-10T21:02:02Z")

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Posted by LadyDragon:

> [@](#):
>
> My name is Mack, and I am a Yanni-holic. This, (and other things…), has caused me to be the subject of scorn and pity, for much of my life.

What’s “yanni” ? Or should I not ask?

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### Author: ![aenea](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/c68b51/32.png) [@aenea](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/aenea)
#### Post date: [December 10, 2002, 9:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/youve-passed-on-im-your-next-of-kin-what-will-i-find-in-your-house/141616/31 "2002-12-10T21:15:33Z")

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[Here](http://www.yanni.com/) ya go.

(shudder)  
It hurt me even to go there long enought to copy the link.

:eek:

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### Author: ![Flowerchild](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/858c86/32.png) [@Flowerchild](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Flowerchild)
#### Post date: [December 11, 2002, 2:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/youve-passed-on-im-your-next-of-kin-what-will-i-find-in-your-house/141616/32 "2002-12-11T02:00:05Z")

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I’m scared to click on the link.😕 😕 😕 :eek: :eek:

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### Author: ![Flowerchild](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/858c86/32.png) [@Flowerchild](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Flowerchild)
#### Post date: [December 11, 2002, 2:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/youve-passed-on-im-your-next-of-kin-what-will-i-find-in-your-house/141616/33 "2002-12-11T02:25:38Z")

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seriuosly, is this gonna be some kind of gross out porn or something?

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### Author: ![Daerlyn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/898d66/32.png) [@Daerlyn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Daerlyn)
#### Post date: [December 11, 2002, 2:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/youve-passed-on-im-your-next-of-kin-what-will-i-find-in-your-house/141616/34 "2002-12-11T02:43:26Z")

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Yanni is a musician, **Flowerchild**. Or at least, so he claims.

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### Author: ![Flowerchild](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/858c86/32.png) [@Flowerchild](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Flowerchild)
#### Post date: [December 11, 2002, 2:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/youve-passed-on-im-your-next-of-kin-what-will-i-find-in-your-house/141616/35 "2002-12-11T02:44:43Z")

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Okay, I feel better, although if he’s that bad,I might not wanna click on the link anyway.

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### Author: ![Spoc](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ecd19e/32.png) [@Spoc](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spoc)
#### Post date: [December 11, 2002, 3:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/youve-passed-on-im-your-next-of-kin-what-will-i-find-in-your-house/141616/36 "2002-12-11T03:02:55Z")

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Here’s something not to try.

In order to avoid that post-humously embarrassing situation, when embarking on a very dangerous and potentially life-threatening mission (night out drinking, riding bike in the dark, plane trip to anywhere) I have sometimes put incriminating small items at the bottom of my paper bag full of newspapers to be thrown out (OK, shutup, recycled).

But, guess what. I end up throwing them out. Especially in the aftermath of Danger Scenario #1.

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### Author: ![Triskadecamus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/b19c9b/32.png) [@Triskadecamus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Triskadecamus)
#### Post date: [December 11, 2002, 6:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/youve-passed-on-im-your-next-of-kin-what-will-i-find-in-your-house/141616/37 "2002-12-11T06:08:43Z")

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I can’t believe it.

People are listening to Yanni, and I’m not even dead yet!

Oh, the humanity!

Tris

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### Author: ![Monstre](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/e274bd/32.png) [@Monstre](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Monstre)
#### Post date: [December 11, 2002, 6:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/youve-passed-on-im-your-next-of-kin-what-will-i-find-in-your-house/141616/38 "2002-12-11T06:18:48Z")

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\*what will I find in your house? \*

Dust bunnies. Lots of dust bunnies.

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### Author: ![Farmer2](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/b9bd4f/32.png) [@Farmer2](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Farmer2)
#### Post date: [December 24, 2002, 4:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/youve-passed-on-im-your-next-of-kin-what-will-i-find-in-your-house/141616/39 "2002-12-24T16:35:51Z")

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Spooge towel, strong enough to be a coffee table.

Hey, I’m just keepin’ it real.

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### Author: ![Gazelle](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/b4bc9f/32.png) [@Gazelle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gazelle)
#### Post date: [December 24, 2002, 6:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/youve-passed-on-im-your-next-of-kin-what-will-i-find-in-your-house/141616/40 "2002-12-24T18:01:48Z")

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1. My husband’s porn on videotapes labeled as “The Dark Crystal” and some other kiddie movies he taped over… Not originals, mind you, just old second-generation tapes that have porn on 'em now.

2. My husband’s computer that has an entire directory called “Obsession” which is filled with pornographic photos and art.

I guess it’s not that bad… Not very embarrassing.

I have some diaries I’d rather no one read, but that’s about it…

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