# YUCK! yuck yuck yuck yuck yuck yuck yuck **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [September 5, 2002, 4:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/yuck-yuck-yuck-yuck-yuck-yuck-yuck-yuck/127149 "2002-09-05T16:43:34Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Mullinator](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/c2a13f/32.png) [@Mullinator](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mullinator)\ **Post date:** [September 5, 2002, 4:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/yuck-yuck-yuck-yuck-yuck-yuck-yuck-yuck/127149/1 "2002-09-05T16:43:34Z")
Pickles and relish on a cheeseburger? That’s just inhumane to all things good and tasty. Whoever decided to unleash this blight upon all sane and innocent palates needs to be placed in front of a trough of rancid potted meat and forced to chew until their teeth are worn down. ---
**Author:** ![dantheman](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dantheman/32/9421_2.png) [@dantheman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dantheman)\ **Post date:** [September 5, 2002, 4:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/yuck-yuck-yuck-yuck-yuck-yuck-yuck-yuck/127149/2 "2002-09-05T16:45:41Z")
So what do you put on it, mayonnaise? Eeww…! ---
**Author:** ![KozGuitar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/87869e/32.png) [@KozGuitar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/KozGuitar)\ **Post date:** [September 5, 2002, 5:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/yuck-yuck-yuck-yuck-yuck-yuck-yuck-yuck/127149/3 "2002-09-05T17:15:27Z")
How odd… I put both pickles AND mayo on my burger… Hold the relish please though. ---
**Author:** ![Mullinator](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/c2a13f/32.png) [@Mullinator](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mullinator)\ **Post date:** [September 5, 2002, 7:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/yuck-yuck-yuck-yuck-yuck-yuck-yuck-yuck/127149/4 "2002-09-05T19:02:28Z")
Sliced tomato, lettuce, spicy mustard, and one of either {Italian dressing, ranch dressing, barbecue sauce, ketchup, taco seasoning}. Depends on the mood. Never mayo. Never. ---
**Author:** ![dantheman](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dantheman/32/9421_2.png) [@dantheman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dantheman)\ **Post date:** [September 5, 2002, 7:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/yuck-yuck-yuck-yuck-yuck-yuck-yuck-yuck/127149/5 "2002-09-05T19:08:31Z")
Well, I’ll put pickles OR relish, but not both - since they’re basically the same thingy. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Exgineer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/a88e4f/32.png) [@Exgineer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Exgineer)\ **Post date:** [September 5, 2002, 7:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/yuck-yuck-yuck-yuck-yuck-yuck-yuck-yuck/127149/6 "2002-09-05T19:17:17Z")
Grill your burger and toast your bun. Spread a verrrry thin layer of mayonaise on the bottom bun, add an even dusting of fresh ground black pepper, then gently place the hot, juicy hamburger patty on it. Top the burger with lettuce, tomatoes, thinly-sliced fresh onion, then the top bun. Banish the ketchup to the landfill. You will never eat a burger any other way again. ---
**Author:** ![gigi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/a587f6/32.png) [@gigi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gigi)\ **Post date:** [September 5, 2002, 7:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/yuck-yuck-yuck-yuck-yuck-yuck-yuck-yuck/127149/7 "2002-09-05T19:27:40Z")
hamburger with plenty of pepper mixed in, bleu cheese bacon mayonnaise sesame roll That is all. (I confess I was relieved to see the OP. That title just screams TMI.) ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [September 5, 2002, 7:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/yuck-yuck-yuck-yuck-yuck-yuck-yuck-yuck/127149/8 "2002-09-05T19:37:03Z")
On a cheeseburger: Ketchup Mustard Minced Onions SOMETIMES tomato and lettuce. YUM!!! ---
**Author:** ![alice\_in\_wonderland](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/alice_in_wonderland/32/176_2.png) [@alice\_in\_wonderland](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/alice_in_wonderland)\ **Post date:** [September 5, 2002, 7:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/yuck-yuck-yuck-yuck-yuck-yuck-yuck-yuck/127149/9 "2002-09-05T19:48:58Z")
YUCK! yuck yuck yuck yuck yuck!! You people eat _ **HAMBURGER!?!?!?!?!?!** _ blech! 😃 ---
**Author:** ![ultrafilter](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/3d9bf3/32.png) [@ultrafilter](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ultrafilter)\ **Post date:** [September 5, 2002, 8:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/yuck-yuck-yuck-yuck-yuck-yuck-yuck-yuck/127149/10 "2002-09-05T20:07:38Z")
I’m a big fan of the garbageburger, myself. Whatever I can find goes on it. ---
**Author:** ![LifeOnWry](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/96bed5/32.png) [@LifeOnWry](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LifeOnWry)\ **Post date:** [September 5, 2002, 9:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/yuck-yuck-yuck-yuck-yuck-yuck-yuck-yuck/127149/11 "2002-09-05T21:37:06Z")
A LifeOnWry hamburger: Grill burger to medium well. Place on the bottom of a poppy-seed bun. On the top of the bun, spread mayonnaise and ketchup. Next add lettuce, tomatoes, onions. Close bun. Open bun, remove hamburger patty and discard. Close bun and eat what’s left. ---
**Author:** ![El\_Kabong](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/el_kabong/32/496_2.png) [@El\_Kabong](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/El_Kabong)\ **Post date:** [September 5, 2002, 9:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/yuck-yuck-yuck-yuck-yuck-yuck-yuck-yuck/127149/12 "2002-09-05T21:51:24Z")
Pickles and relish? that’s just pickles and chopped pickles as far as I’m concerned. Salad dressings on burgers: yuck (or yucque, in the original French). I don’t put ketchup on my salad, do I? **Exgineer** , preach on, brother. If one is going to have lettuce and tomato on a burger, mayo is the only way to go. ---
**Author:** ![dreamer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/6bbea6/32.png) [@dreamer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dreamer)\ **Post date:** [September 5, 2002, 10:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/yuck-yuck-yuck-yuck-yuck-yuck-yuck-yuck/127149/13 "2002-09-05T22:33:02Z")
Well, when I have the rare opportunity to eat at _Fatburger_ I usually have an egg on my burger, along with pickles. No relish though, that _is_ yucky. ---
**Author:** ![Muffin](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/muffin/32/4341_2.png) [@Muffin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Muffin)\ **Post date:** [September 5, 2002, 10:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/yuck-yuck-yuck-yuck-yuck-yuck-yuck-yuck/127149/14 "2002-09-05T22:39:08Z")
Pickles? Relish? Yuckerooni. That stuff isn’t food. It’s embalming fluid with chunks. ---
**Author:** ![Derleth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/b9e5f3/32.png) [@Derleth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Derleth)\ **Post date:** [September 5, 2002, 10:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/yuck-yuck-yuck-yuck-yuck-yuck-yuck-yuck/127149/15 "2002-09-05T22:44:13Z")
**dreamer** , I envy you. I was graced by the presence of a Fatburger near my hotel when I stayed in Las Vegas, and I took great pleasure in walking down (and observing the wildlife on The Strip :)) and feasting upon the perfect diner burger (as opposed to the perfect fast-food burgers served up by In-N-Out :D) while listening to the perfect music: Old Rhythm and Blues, straight out of my fondest memories, playing on a jukebox. I ate amazing burgers there, with tomatoes crisp enough to cut you and onions fragrant enough to make the walls cry. However, if I ever ate a burger with eggs on it, I do believe my arteries would collectively reach up and throttle me. 😃 (This notwithstanding the egg-stuffed porkchops I ate on vacation in Vienna.) ---
**Author:** ![Jack\_Batty](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jack_batty/32/3201_2.png) [@Jack\_Batty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jack_Batty)\ **Post date:** [September 5, 2002, 10:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/yuck-yuck-yuck-yuck-yuck-yuck-yuck-yuck/127149/16 "2002-09-05T22:54:32Z")
Hold the godamned phone right there. You put fucking Ranch dressing on a burger?!? What are you, communist? Ranch dressing goes on salad. Nothing else. Blecch!! ---
**Author:** ![Giraffe](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/giraffe/32/129_2.png) [@Giraffe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Giraffe)\ **Post date:** [September 6, 2002, 12:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/yuck-yuck-yuck-yuck-yuck-yuck-yuck-yuck/127149/17 "2002-09-06T00:32:57Z")
Mmmmmm… Burger… ---
**Author:** ![Reeder](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/c6cbf5/32.png) [@Reeder](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Reeder)\ **Post date:** [September 6, 2002, 1:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/yuck-yuck-yuck-yuck-yuck-yuck-yuck-yuck/127149/18 "2002-09-06T01:55:30Z")
Chili, mustard, bbq slaw on a toasted bun. ---
**Author:** ![Miller](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/miller/32/481_2.png) [@Miller](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Miller)\ **Post date:** [September 6, 2002, 4:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/yuck-yuck-yuck-yuck-yuck-yuck-yuck-yuck/127149/19 "2002-09-06T04:42:47Z")
> [@](#): > > Hold the godamned phone right there. > > You put fucking Ranch dressing on a burger?!? What are you, communist? > > Ranch dressing goes on salad. Nothing else. > > Blecch!! Hell, salad is the only thing I _don’t_ put ranch on. Best is french fried with a side of ranch dip. ---
**Author:** ![Essured](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/278dde/32.png) [@Essured](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Essured)\ **Post date:** [September 6, 2002, 5:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/yuck-yuck-yuck-yuck-yuck-yuck-yuck-yuck/127149/20 "2002-09-06T05:27:22Z")
Aha, but have you had a burger with beetroot on it ? 😉 mmmm yummy [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/yuck-yuck-yuck-yuck-yuck-yuck-yuck-yuck/127149.md?page=2)