# Zelenskyy's Zeroes - The Sitcom **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Tags:** ukraine-invasion\ **Created:** [November 21, 2022, 5:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/zelenskyys-zeroes-the-sitcom/975330 "2022-11-21T17:07:45Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 14\ **Page:** 10
**Author:** ![Tatterdemalion](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/43a26b/32.png) [@Tatterdemalion](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tatterdemalion)\ **Post date:** [June 14, 2023, 12:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/zelenskyys-zeroes-the-sitcom/975330/181 "2023-06-14T12:39:51Z")
I don’t think that captures the absurdist intent of this thread. It could actually happen. ---
**Author:** ![Civil\_Guy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/d78d45/32.png) [@Civil\_Guy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Civil_Guy)\ **Post date:** [June 14, 2023, 10:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/zelenskyys-zeroes-the-sitcom/975330/182 "2023-06-14T22:27:33Z")
Then I give up. There isn’t any way I could come up with anything more absurd than current news. ---
**Author:** ![Tatterdemalion](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/43a26b/32.png) [@Tatterdemalion](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tatterdemalion)\ **Post date:** [June 14, 2023, 10:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/zelenskyys-zeroes-the-sitcom/975330/183 "2023-06-14T22:40:31Z")
Poe’s law is absolutely running amok isn’t it. ---
**Author:** ![Horatius](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/horatius/32/3572_2.png) [@Horatius](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Horatius)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2023, 11:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/zelenskyys-zeroes-the-sitcom/975330/184 "2023-06-15T11:48:13Z")
> [@Civil\_Guy](#): > > There isn’t any way I could come up with anything more absurd than current news. That’s the trick. As Robert Heinlein once said, you don’t write a new story, you just file the serial numbers off an older story. Take almost any story of Russian “efforts” in Ukraine, then slap a Zeroes framing story on top of it. ---
**Author:** ![Kent\_Clark](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kent_clark/32/105_2.png) [@Kent\_Clark](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kent_Clark)\ **Post date:** [June 27, 2023, 1:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/zelenskyys-zeroes-the-sitcom/975330/185 "2023-06-27T01:49:36Z")
In their most dangerous mission yet, the Zeroes are assigned to infiltrate a crack Russian unit and gather as much information and sow as much dissension as possible before being caught. Much to their surprise they find themselves in a convoy on its way to occupy Rostov on Don. Suddenly the commander flees to Belarus. Once again, Sergiy insists that he and his commandos had nothing to do with it, and once again Zelenskyy chides him for not discussing the brilliant strategy they used. ---
**Author:** ![Sunspace](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sunspace/32/1250_2.png) [@Sunspace](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sunspace)\ **Post date:** [July 5, 2023, 8:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/zelenskyys-zeroes-the-sitcom/975330/186 "2023-07-05T08:41:21Z")
This is brilliant. We need to somehow work in the destroyed dam and the emptying reservoir. Maybe not about the Russians accidentally destroying the dam when they were only trying to put a small hole in it—that is still damaging Ukraine rather than a Russian self-own. But later the Team is trying to cross the newly-revealed land and the Russians try to stop them and accidentally disable the Crimean Canal? Of course, it’s sponsored by [ZelenskyO’s — the Cereal of Heroes](https://www.zelenskyos.com/)! ---
**Author:** ![SoToasty](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sotoasty/32/2803_2.png) [@SoToasty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SoToasty)\ **Post date:** [July 14, 2023, 7:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/zelenskyys-zeroes-the-sitcom/975330/188 "2023-07-14T19:25:35Z")
With our heroes tasked to take on the spetsnaz, they get a little help. (Second video) > [@Russia invades Ukraine {2022-02-24} (Part 2)](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/russia-invades-ukraine-2022-02-24-part-2/973972/5113): > > Erdogan says Putin has agreed to extend Black Sea grain deal. Unclear whether Putin knows this yet. Fool me once… Thanks @Walken_After_Midnight ---
**Author:** ![Horatius](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/horatius/32/3572_2.png) [@Horatius](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Horatius)\ **Post date:** [July 14, 2023, 7:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/zelenskyys-zeroes-the-sitcom/975330/189 "2023-07-14T19:35:15Z")
> [@SoToasty](#): > > With our heroes tasked to take on the spetsnaz, they get a little help. I saw that video, and was so gobsmacked I didn’t even think of this thread! Hmm. I could re-purpose an old urban legend I heard about the “Front towards enemy” label on US claymore mines. The Zeroes are trying to explain how an entire mortar platoon took themselves out of the fight the very first time they fired their weapons. “The Russians saw “Pointy end towards enemy” printed on the mortar rounds, and thinking, “No one is stupid enough to need such a label on their equipment, it must be there to fool stupid Ukrainians into firing their mortars backwards!”, proceeded to drop their rounds into the mortar tubes pointy-end first.” ---
**Author:** ![silenus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/silenus/32/166_2.png) [@silenus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/silenus)\ **Post date:** [July 14, 2023, 7:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/zelenskyys-zeroes-the-sitcom/975330/190 "2023-07-14T19:47:24Z")
> [@Horatius](#): > > I could re-purpose an old urban legend I heard about the “Front towards enemy” label on US claymore mines. What urban legend? That’s what it says. [![](https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/c/c1/US_M18a1_claymore_mine.jpg) ](https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/c/c1/US_M18a1_claymore_mine.jpg) ---
**Author:** ![Horatius](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/horatius/32/3572_2.png) [@Horatius](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Horatius)\ **Post date:** [July 14, 2023, 7:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/zelenskyys-zeroes-the-sitcom/975330/191 "2023-07-14T19:50:23Z")
The urban legend was about some Viet Cong soldiers capturing a supply of US claymores, and thinking, “No one is _that_ stupid…” figured it was a ruse. So when they tested the mines, they put them the other way 'round, and blew themselves to smithereens. Almost certainly never happened, but it makes a good story! And the Russian exemplifies exactly why some people need labels. ---
**Author:** ![silenus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/silenus/32/166_2.png) [@silenus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/silenus)\ **Post date:** [July 14, 2023, 7:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/zelenskyys-zeroes-the-sitcom/975330/192 "2023-07-14T19:53:34Z")
Ah. Thank you. I don’t think I’d ever heard that one. ---
**Author:** ![filmore](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/7993a0/32.png) [@filmore](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/filmore)\ **Post date:** [August 7, 2023, 3:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/zelenskyys-zeroes-the-sitcom/975330/193 "2023-08-07T15:37:44Z")
The heroes are sent on a mission to find the location of a hidden Russian artillery site. While they are heading in the general direction, a group of the Russians from the site are on their weekly looting excursions in the local towns. They come across a military surplus store. Tired of wearing their dirty, shoddy, Russian-issued uniforms, they decide to change into the nice, new uniforms from the store. However, they don’t realize that they are Ukrainian uniforms. As they are heading back to their unit, a Russian drone spots the men and, thinking that they are Ukrainians, orders a strike on them from the hidden Russian artillery site our heroes are trying to find. The Russian artillery takes out all the men. A nearby Ukrainian unit is alerted of the strike and is able to pinpoint the location of the Russians. The Ukrainians order an immediate strike and the previously hidden Russian artillery unit is completely wiped out. The heroes are once again lauded for their excellence and bravery while they try to convince everyone that they had nothing to do with it. Darn! It’s already been done: [https://www.reddit.com/r/ukraine/comments/15k6rsy/51\_less\_russians\_because\_they\_changed\_into/](https://www.reddit.com/r/ukraine/comments/15k6rsy/51_less_russians_because_they_changed_into/) ---
**Author:** ![Horatius](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/horatius/32/3572_2.png) [@Horatius](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Horatius)\ **Post date:** [September 18, 2024, 5:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/zelenskyys-zeroes-the-sitcom/975330/194 "2024-09-18T17:05:09Z")
> [@Russia invades Ukraine {2022-02-24} (Part 2)](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/russia-invades-ukraine-2022-02-24-part-2/973972/7552): > > “It (the concrete facilities) ensures their reliable and safe storage, protects them from air and missile strikes and even from the damaging factors of a nuclear explosion,” RIA quoted Bulgakov as saying at the time." > [@Russia invades Ukraine {2022-02-24} (Part 2)](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/russia-invades-ukraine-2022-02-24-part-2/973972/7552): > > Serious explosions and fires at a Russian ammunition plant. Russia: Tver region governor, comrade Igor Rudenya - “The unmanned drones were shot down by the Ministry of Defence’s air defenses, the falling debris caused a fire…” 30,000 ton missile & artillery arsenal built in 2018 was supposed to be able to withstand a nuclear strike. [https://www.reuters.com/world/europe/ukraine-targets-western-russian-regions-with-drones-russian-officials-says-2024-09-18/](https://www.reuters.com/world/europe/ukraine-targets-western-russian-regions-with-drones-russian-officials-says-2024-09-18/) The “falling debris” from shooting dow… In the new Season of Zelenskyy’s Zeroes, they celebrate the great success they’ve been having with a new series of Ukrainian weapons, that exploit the one weakness the Russian designers never considered: _Falling debris_. ---
**Author:** ![Saint\_Cad](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/saint_cad/32/18907_2.png) [@Saint\_Cad](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Saint_Cad)\ **Post date:** [September 18, 2024, 5:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/zelenskyys-zeroes-the-sitcom/975330/195 "2024-09-18T17:11:21Z")
In one scene , the Russians keep pressing the button to launch cruise missiles to take out a Ukrainian hospital and they cannot figure out why the missiles won’t launch. Cut to the bathroom where the empty urinals keep flushing. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/zelenskyys-zeroes-the-sitcom/975330.md?page=9)