# Zogby: If America Were 'Survivor' Which State Would You Vote Off? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [April 4, 2005, 4:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/zogby-if-america-were-survivor-which-state-would-you-vote-off/297687 "2005-04-04T16:45:34Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![bluecanary](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bluecanary/32/3614_2.png) [@bluecanary](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bluecanary)\ **Post date:** [April 4, 2005, 9:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/zogby-if-america-were-survivor-which-state-would-you-vote-off/297687/41 "2005-04-04T21:36:21Z")
No mention of Missouri yet? ---
**Author:** ![Metacom](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/ecae2f/32.png) [@Metacom](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Metacom)\ **Post date:** [April 4, 2005, 9:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/zogby-if-america-were-survivor-which-state-would-you-vote-off/297687/42 "2005-04-04T21:40:05Z")
Can us liberal non-native Texans at least get some kind of relocation package from all y’all? 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Giraffe](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/giraffe/32/129_2.png) [@Giraffe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Giraffe)\ **Post date:** [April 4, 2005, 9:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/zogby-if-america-were-survivor-which-state-would-you-vote-off/297687/43 "2005-04-04T21:58:15Z")
Hmmm, tough one. North Dakota is pretty much useless, so no one would really notice if it got voted off. However, they are heavily armed, so I don’t know if we want a rogue nuclear nation right on our doorstep. Eh, I’ll go with Texas. They’re also heavily armed, but we can use Oklahoma as a human shield. ---
**Author:** ![Blalron](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/35a633/32.png) [@Blalron](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Blalron)\ **Post date:** [April 4, 2005, 10:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/zogby-if-america-were-survivor-which-state-would-you-vote-off/297687/44 "2005-04-04T22:00:26Z")
“Floriduh” God, I hate that damned State! Everything about it! I think it was George Carlin that said everything in Florida is in the 80s: The temperatures, the ages, and the IQs. Hurricane after Hurricane coming in there and clogging up the damned news. I hate the shape of the state too, it looks like a flacid penis drooping off the edge of America. ---
**Author:** ![Syntropy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/65b543/32.png) [@Syntropy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Syntropy)\ **Post date:** [April 4, 2005, 10:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/zogby-if-america-were-survivor-which-state-would-you-vote-off/297687/45 "2005-04-04T22:11:00Z")
> [@Diceman](#): > > I say go for it. The rest of us would be happy to se you go! Oh, but do figure out where you’re going to get your water from, because we’ll be lining up to dynamite your aquifers so we won’t have to listen to whiny public service ads for water conservation any more 😛 No worries. We’ll just discuss it when you’re yammering about trade contracts for all the GPS systems, microchips, NASA engineers, genetic research, and everything else we currently contribute to the US gov’t. And since we won’t have to buy back energy we produce here anymore, paying for water shouldn’t be a problem. You can have Ahnolt, we’re done with him. I voted Alabama on that survey, but I was sorely tempted to say Iowa. ---
**Author:** ![pravnik](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/8edcca/32.png) [@pravnik](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pravnik)\ **Post date:** [April 4, 2005, 10:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/zogby-if-america-were-survivor-which-state-would-you-vote-off/297687/46 "2005-04-04T22:30:48Z")
Geez, y’all really know how to make a guy feel welcome. ---
**Author:** ![Harborwolf](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/c89c15/32.png) [@Harborwolf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Harborwolf)\ **Post date:** [April 4, 2005, 10:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/zogby-if-america-were-survivor-which-state-would-you-vote-off/297687/47 "2005-04-04T22:47:14Z")
My first thought was Florida. They gave us the 2000 election, Terry Schiavo, and Elian Gonzales. They’re a magnet for hurricanes. And those snowbird seniors come back here every summer and bitch up the place. After a moment though, I realized that the mob is right. Let’s cut off Texas. They’ve been pissing and moaning about seceding for so long that we should give them what they want. ---
**Author:** ![pravnik](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/8edcca/32.png) [@pravnik](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pravnik)\ **Post date:** [April 4, 2005, 11:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/zogby-if-america-were-survivor-which-state-would-you-vote-off/297687/48 "2005-04-04T23:16:25Z")
Wait a minute… Right now we’re all paying anywhere from $2.35 to $3.00 per gallon for gas, largely due to a single refinery explosion in Texas. Texas accounts for 26 percent of the nation’s refining capacity, and is ranked 1st in the nation in crude oil production and crude oil reserves (excluding federal offshore), 20 and 21 percent respectively. The Port of Houston ranks first in the nation in foriegn tonnage and brings in millions of gallons of oil every year to the nation’s largest petrochemical complex. Get rid of us and you’ll remember the days when gas cost less than $15 a gallon wistfully, you’ll be drilling ANWAR in a week, and it’ll be your kids getting asthma from all your brand new refineries instead of ours for a change. So basically, you’re stuck with us. Yee haw! Neener neener! ---
**Author:** ![elfkin477](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/a9a28c/32.png) [@elfkin477](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elfkin477)\ **Post date:** [April 4, 2005, 11:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/zogby-if-america-were-survivor-which-state-would-you-vote-off/297687/49 "2005-04-04T23:19:16Z")
Utah. ---
**Author:** ![DMark](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e68b1a/32.png) [@DMark](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DMark)\ **Post date:** [April 5, 2005, 12:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/zogby-if-america-were-survivor-which-state-would-you-vote-off/297687/50 "2005-04-05T00:06:23Z")
Times like this that I wish Washington DC was a state so we could vote it off. Oh well. Therefore I will join in the landslide - out with Texas. ---
**Author:** ![Kilvert\_s\_Pagan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/c37758/32.png) [@Kilvert\_s\_Pagan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kilvert_s_Pagan)\ **Post date:** [April 5, 2005, 12:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/zogby-if-america-were-survivor-which-state-would-you-vote-off/297687/51 "2005-04-05T00:16:14Z")
Texas, even though it means that my claims processing center in Plano would then count as “offshore” outsourcing. :rolleyes: ---
**Author:** ![asterion](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/4da419/32.png) [@asterion](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/asterion)\ **Post date:** [April 5, 2005, 12:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/zogby-if-america-were-survivor-which-state-would-you-vote-off/297687/52 "2005-04-05T00:22:04Z")
Can we get rid of both California AND Texas? And maybe throw in Florida for good measure? My hatred of the first two are due to where I live and I think we all know that when your state gets its own tag on Fark that it’s got major problems. ---
**Author:** ![gfloyd](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/d2c977/32.png) [@gfloyd](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gfloyd)\ **Post date:** [April 5, 2005, 12:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/zogby-if-america-were-survivor-which-state-would-you-vote-off/297687/53 "2005-04-05T00:54:12Z")
Why do people want to loose MA? I mean we have crappy winters, corrupt politicians and horrid drivers. But still, we’ve got history. And that Big Dig thing should be done soon, I hope. So avoid our airport, major cities and winter time and keep us in the Union!!! Anyway, I think we need to keep Texas, sadly. What about Florida, as it has caused way too many problems. ---
**Author:** ![silenus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/silenus/32/166_2.png) [@silenus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/silenus)\ **Post date:** [April 5, 2005, 12:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/zogby-if-america-were-survivor-which-state-would-you-vote-off/297687/54 "2005-04-05T00:54:16Z")
OK, Texans! Now’s our chance! If we can get Arizona and New Mexico to buy in (shouldn’t be too hard) we can form the sovereign country of Texifornia. We’ll control all the oil, all the tech. development, all the decent weather, etc. Let the rest of the country go broke paying for what _we_ produce. And to answer the previous challenge…we’ll get our water the way God intended… in little bottles from Safeway! 😃 ---
**Author:** ![panache45](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/panache45/32/64_2.png) [@panache45](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/panache45)\ **Post date:** [April 5, 2005, 12:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/zogby-if-america-were-survivor-which-state-would-you-vote-off/297687/55 "2005-04-05T00:57:21Z")
1. Give DC statehood. 2. Send it packing. But actually, I’d love to give Hawaii back to the natives, from whom we stole it. Or Ohio, where I live. Maybe we could be annexed by Canada, then My Guy and I can get married. Though I seriously doubt Canada would \*\*want \*\*Ohio. ---
**Author:** ![Scumpup](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ce73a5/32.png) [@Scumpup](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scumpup)\ **Post date:** [April 5, 2005, 1:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/zogby-if-america-were-survivor-which-state-would-you-vote-off/297687/56 "2005-04-05T01:02:18Z")
Texas. Absofuckinglutely Texas. ---
**Author:** ![SteveG1](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/bb73d2/32.png) [@SteveG1](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SteveG1)\ **Post date:** [April 5, 2005, 1:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/zogby-if-america-were-survivor-which-state-would-you-vote-off/297687/57 "2005-04-05T01:17:06Z")
I want to get rid of all those damn square shaped states - Colorado, Wyoming, those states. Why? I hated them in grade school geography, when we were expected to know which one was which, and fill the names in. At least the other stated had recognizable and unique shapes. ---
**Author:** ![Chance\_the\_Gardener](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/eada6e/32.png) [@Chance\_the\_Gardener](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chance_the_Gardener)\ **Post date:** [April 5, 2005, 1:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/zogby-if-america-were-survivor-which-state-would-you-vote-off/297687/58 "2005-04-05T01:24:56Z")
> [@pravnik](#): > > Get rid of us and you’ll remember the days when gas cost less than $15 a gallon wistfully, you’ll be drilling ANWAR in a week, and it’ll be your kids getting asthma from all your brand new refineries instead of ours for a change. > > So basically, you’re stuck with us. > > Yee haw! Neener neener! Ah, giddadheah! I live in Noo Yawk, where ownin’ a car is more trouble ‘n it’s woit. I owned a car for tree weeks in Brooklyn, an’ den, genuk! I got ridda it, parkin’ was such a farkafke tsure. And, oi, the ganefs… Youse kin take yer oil wells 'n pipe ‘em where da sun don’ shine! We got da best public transportation in da woild (when it runs.) Anyway, I still think you guys ought to stay. No state can be that big and that diverse and remain firmly in the control of conservatives. When Tom DeLay is finally hauled off to jail and Governor Friedman denies him parole, we’ll see a new dawn in America. It’s just a matter of time, and it’s up to Texas to help us through. So all y’all better git crackin’! Y’ain’t fixin’ ta hold us back no longer, are ya? ---
**Author:** ![Johnny\_L.A](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnny_l.a/32/1084_2.png) [@Johnny\_L.A](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johnny_L.A)\ **Post date:** [April 5, 2005, 1:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/zogby-if-america-were-survivor-which-state-would-you-vote-off/297687/59 "2005-04-05T01:24:58Z")
> [@silenus](#): > > OK, Texans! Now’s our chance! If we can get Arizona and New Mexico to buy in (shouldn’t be too hard) we can form the sovereign country of Texifornia. We’ll control all the oil, all the tech. development, all the decent weather, etc. Let the rest of the country go broke paying for what _we_ produce. > > And to answer the previous challenge…we’ll get our water the way God intended… > > in little bottles from Safeway! 😃 Nah. As a native Californian (currently ex-pat in WA), I wouldn’t want Texas. I say California should be its own nation. Or they can join with Washington, Oregon (because it’s inconveniently placed between CA and WA), Alaska and Nevada. I’d invite Arizona, but it’s too conservative for me. ---
**Author:** ![SteveG1](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/bb73d2/32.png) [@SteveG1](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SteveG1)\ **Post date:** [April 5, 2005, 1:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/zogby-if-america-were-survivor-which-state-would-you-vote-off/297687/60 "2005-04-05T01:32:31Z")
> [@Chance the Gardener](#): > > Ah, giddadheah! I live in Noo Yawk, where ownin’ a car is more trouble ‘n it’s woit. I owned a car for tree weeks in Brooklyn, an’ den, genuk! I got ridda it, parkin’ was such a farkafke tsure. And, oi, the ganefs… Youse kin take yer oil wells 'n pipe ‘em where da sun don’ shine! We got da best public transportation in da woild (when it runs.) > > Anyway, I still think you guys ought to stay. No state can be that big and that diverse and remain firmly in the control of conservatives. When Tom DeLay is finally hauled off to jail and Governor Friedman denies him parole, we’ll see a new dawn in America. It’s just a matter of time, and it’s up to Texas to help us through. So all y’all better git crackin’! Y’ain’t fixin’ ta hold us back no longer, are ya? All I want to add, as one born and raised in NY, is fageddaboutit. And to our friends in Texas (lived there and liked it) Git 'er done! 😃 [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/zogby-if-america-were-survivor-which-state-would-you-vote-off/297687.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/zogby-if-america-were-survivor-which-state-would-you-vote-off/297687.md?page=4)