# Zoo keeper helps constipated monkey **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [May 4, 2012, 2:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/zoo-keeper-helps-constipated-monkey/620826 "2012-05-04T02:41:22Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 12\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Nobody](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/94ad74/32.png) [@Nobody](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nobody)\ **Post date:** [May 4, 2012, 2:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/zoo-keeper-helps-constipated-monkey/620826/1 "2012-05-04T02:41:22Z")
[In a disgusting way](http://gawker.com/5907337/zoo-keeper-helps-constipated-monkey-pass-peanut-by-licking-its-butt-for-an-hour). 😛 Using a warm wet washcloth would have given the same results. ---
**Author:** ![Pai325](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/c68b51/32.png) [@Pai325](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Pai325)\ **Post date:** [May 4, 2012, 3:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/zoo-keeper-helps-constipated-monkey/620826/2 "2012-05-04T03:27:10Z")
That’s got to be a joke, doesn’t it? ---
**Author:** ![cochrane](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cochrane/32/10441_2.png) [@cochrane](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cochrane)\ **Post date:** [May 4, 2012, 3:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/zoo-keeper-helps-constipated-monkey/620826/3 "2012-05-04T03:48:26Z")
That’s one for the “Have You Ever Eaten Poop?” thread. :eek: ---
**Author:** ![Sister\_Vigilante](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/9de0a6/32.png) [@Sister\_Vigilante](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sister_Vigilante)\ **Post date:** [May 4, 2012, 4:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/zoo-keeper-helps-constipated-monkey/620826/4 "2012-05-04T04:33:11Z")
His only choice was his tongue? Gotta be a joke. Or a crazy guy. ---
**Author:** ![Nobody](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/94ad74/32.png) [@Nobody](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nobody)\ **Post date:** [May 4, 2012, 4:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/zoo-keeper-helps-constipated-monkey/620826/5 "2012-05-04T04:36:47Z")
I’m surprised no-one has noticed my choice of smiley. 😃 > [@Pai325](#): > > That’s got to be a joke, doesn’t it? [There are a few links about it](http://www.google.com/search?hl=en&gl=us&tbm=nws&q=Zhang+Bangsheng&oq=Zhang+Bangsheng&aq=f&aqi=d2&aql=&gs_l=news-cc.12..43j43i400.1929.1929.0.3118.1.1.0.0.0.0.92.92.1.1.0...0.0.). The [Huffington Post](http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2012/05/03/zoo-keeper-licks-monkeys-butt_n_1475873.html) article does include a poll asking readers if they think it’s a hoax or not. ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [May 4, 2012, 6:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/zoo-keeper-helps-constipated-monkey/620826/6 "2012-05-04T06:45:14Z")
I thought you were supposed to, you know, spank your monkey. ---
**Author:** ![Thudlow\_Boink](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/thudlow_boink/32/320_2.png) [@Thudlow\_Boink](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Thudlow_Boink)\ **Post date:** [May 4, 2012, 1:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/zoo-keeper-helps-constipated-monkey/620826/7 "2012-05-04T13:11:53Z")
> [@Nobody](#): > > constipated monkey Band name! ---
**Author:** ![notfrommensa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/f14d63/32.png) [@notfrommensa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/notfrommensa)\ **Post date:** [May 5, 2012, 12:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/zoo-keeper-helps-constipated-monkey/620826/8 "2012-05-05T00:23:18Z")
Just what does a constipated monkey fling? ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [May 5, 2012, 6:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/zoo-keeper-helps-constipated-monkey/620826/9 "2012-05-05T18:46:56Z")
> [@notfrommensa](#): > > Just what does a constipated monkey fling? Laxatives? ---
**Author:** ![PlainJain](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/5daacb/32.png) [@PlainJain](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PlainJain)\ **Post date:** [May 5, 2012, 6:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/zoo-keeper-helps-constipated-monkey/620826/10 "2012-05-05T18:54:40Z")
> [@notfrommensa](#): > > Just what does a constipated monkey fling? Air poop. ---
**Author:** ![Mangetout](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mangetout/32/19_2.png) [@Mangetout](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mangetout)\ **Post date:** [May 5, 2012, 7:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/zoo-keeper-helps-constipated-monkey/620826/11 "2012-05-05T19:16:07Z")
Did you hear about the constipated mathematician? He worked it out with a pencil ---
**Author:** ![Nobody](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/94ad74/32.png) [@Nobody](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nobody)\ **Post date:** [May 5, 2012, 7:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/zoo-keeper-helps-constipated-monkey/620826/12 "2012-05-05T19:27:51Z")
> [@Mangetout](#): > > Did you hear about the constipated mathematician? > > He worked it out with a pencil Was it a Number 2 pencil?