Please stop posting spoilers in thread titles in Cafe Society.

The BBQ Pit
1

Sigh.

I’m not retyping the whole thing. It’s not even a rant anyway, just a polite request.

The gist was, there’s been some LOTR spoilers in thread titles lately, and it’s sort of annoying because I’m in the middle of reading LOTR for the first time. I know it’s been written for 50 years and I had plenty of time to read it before now, but I didn’t. I avoid threads that are about LOTR because I figure there will be lots of spoilers inside. It would just be nice if I didn’t have to read them in the thread titles.

Applicable not just to LOTR but other works as well, of course.

2

The Holy Bible Spoiler:

Jesus dies.
But then He comes back to life.

:smiley:

3

HE COMES BACK TO LIFE?!?

When, when? Is it in Revelations? Or somewhere in Romans? OH MY GOD! Next thing you’re gonna be telling me is that Vader is Luke’s father!

P.S. - Frodo loses a finger.

4

Re: Please stop posting [LOTR] spoilers in thread titles in Cafe Society.

Um…no.

Sorry.

I’m getting kinda tired of people casually tossing around the word “spoiler”. A true spoiler is something that actually ruins the book/movie/whatever if you know it in advance, such as “The butler did it!”. I don’t think your reading experience will be greatly diminished just because you hear “there’s a character later named ‘Wormtongue’!”

With reference to LOTR: in my opinion, there is but ONE possible true “spoiler” in the entire book, and “Gandalf lives!” isn’t it. And that spoiler is, of course,

that Frodo gets to Mount Doom, is seized by the corrupt power of the Ring, battles with Gollum for the ring, loses a finger in the process (when Gollum bites it off with the Ring still on it), and Gollum, while dancing in celebration, slips and falls into the Cracks of Doom, destroying the ring.

The rest is window-dressing.

5

There’s no using the word “please” here. This is the BBQ pit!!

Oh, and no fighting in the war room!

6

Yes, I would consider “Gandalf lives” to be a major spoiler, and I’m just happy that I’d already made it past that point in the book before reading your post. Maybe you don’t consider it a major surprise, but I did.

All I’m asking for is a little courtesy for those of us who may not have read/seen the work in question yet. I don’t care about revealing character names or whatever, but stuff like “Gandalf lives” or “The end of Frodo” – well, why couldn’t the thread be titled “What happens to Frodo” instead? It still gets the point across for anyone who’s read the book and doesn’t give anything away for those who haven’t.

Again, I’m not really ranting or upset at anyone in particular. I just wanted to point out that sometimes there are newbies to even extremely popular works and it would be nice if you’d stop and think, “Hey, that’s sort of a major plot point that I just stuck in the thread title there” before hitting Submit, is all.

And please don’t post any more examples of LOTR spoilers in this thread outside the spoiler tags. Pretty please? With whipped cream on top?

7

So I guess you don’t want to hear about the part where Sam gets captured by the black riders, is tortured and implanted with a seed of evil which corrupts him, body and mind, and he tries to steal the ring and kill Frodo? It’s quite horrendous… Frodo stabs Sam in the throat, and Sam’s writhing body lashes out with his dying strength and gives Frodo a nice cut across the eye. When Frodo gets back to the Shire, he has to tell Rosie all about it…

It was quite traumatic.

Oops, you wanted me to put it in one of these…?

Don’t worry, that doesn’t happen

8

I’m gonna go ahead and assume that your sudden interest in the series is founded on the success and acclaim gathered by the recent movie.

Considering Gandalf appears in trailers for the upcoming The Two Towers movie, I’d hardly consider “Gandalf lives!” a spoiler. Hell, even before there was a Two Towers trailer, he appeared in the four-minute “sneak preview” attached to the end of the theatrical Fellowship of the Ring, which means the cat, if there ever was one, was out of the bag about 7 months ago. And of course there are also those fifty year old books to consider…

I’m sorry, but there is a statute of limitations on this sort of thing. And we’re way past it as far as Lord of the Rings is concerned. If you want to avoid “spoilers”, you are perfectly free to hide your eyes whenever you think you’re approaching a giveaway. But I really don’t see why everyone else has to accommodate you. I mean, we’re not e-mailing the spoilers to you, isn’t that enough?

By the way, Rosebud was his sled, Vader is Luke’s father, The Princess Bride has a happy ending, Rhett doesn’t marry Scarlett, Professor Higgins and Eliza Doolittle fall in love, Rocky loses to Apollo, Norman Bates’ mother is dead and he just dressed like her, Deckard might be a replicant, Ilsa gets on the plane with Victor instead of staying with Rick, Mrs. Voorhees is the killer, the Chief suffocates McMurphy, Old Yeller gets rabid and has to be put down, the apes evolved from man, Antonius Block loses his chess game, “she” is really a “he”, he buried her alive, her sister wasn’t the one driving the car when she was crippled, Charlie wins the contest and inherits the chocolate factory, the Falcon is a fake, everyone dies at the end, it really is a wonderful life, and finally, of course…

…it was all just a dream!!!

9

And: he was a ghost all along.

10

And let’s not forget how the fragile black dude caused all the accidents. Oh, and Lucy yanks the football away… yet again.

11

Now on this there’s no need to be concerned as that is most certainly not a spoiler. Tolkein set up an incredibly elaborate universe and the deaths of most characters are revealed is not in the works published in his lifetime then in the collected works published afterwards. So that title is vague enough that it should leave you wondering “Does he mean that Frodo and Sauron both die in a final fight destroying the ring or does Frodo survive the battle and retire to Bag End to regale the youngsters with tales of adventure for the rest of his days.”

12

Are you fucking braindead you stupid asshole? Who the fuck are you to decide that “Gandalf lives” isn’t a goddamn spoiler? To me it was, because unfortunately I have never read the books and don’t intend to. I saw the movie and was looking forward to the next one. I thought to myself,“That sucks that Gandalf died. I was expecting him to do some cool wizard spells or something.”

Now I know what happens.

You fucking suck. Dipshit.

13

I agree that “Gandalf lives” is a big spoiler for people who didn’t read the books. I was pretty disgusted to see that they showed Gandalf in the preview of Two Towers.

I advised al my friends not to look at this preview, so as not to spoil their experience when watching the Two Towers.

Man, I can remember reading LOTR for the first time, and learning that Gandalf survived. If they would have included “and Gandalf returns” on the bookcover it would have greatly diminished my reading-pleasure.

14

Max Torque, all I’m doing is politely asking that people maybe think twice about posting the spoiler in the actual thread title. In the thread itself, hey, spoilers away. Yes, I am aware that the books have been out for 50 years. I am only 25 years old, but that still gives me 20 years or so in which I could have read them before. However, I have not. I’ve also been skipping the trailers for the movies, because I don’t want to find out what happens before I get to it in the book.

And uh, I really can’t believe all those spoilers you gave away in your last post. Yeah, some of them are obvious to anyone who hasn’t been living in a cave for the last 30 years, but is it too much to ask to show a little courtesy to people who might not have read every single book and seen every single movie that you think they should have read and seen before this point?

Once again, yes, I realize that there is some kind of statute of limitations on spoilers, which is why I’m not asking for people to refrain from posting them entirely, I’m just asking for them to keep them out of the THREAD TITLE. And this thread. Please. I don’t really know how much more nicely I can ask. I do not want to be spoilered. I would like to continue to be able to read this thread, as I am the OP and everything. I know it’s funny and hilarious to post spoilers right after the OP said “please no spoilers”. Ha, ha. There, I have now laughed. Now please stop it.

15

MsWhatsit,
is it still ok if things like “bacteria” or “mold & yeast” or even “high temperatures with a lack of pasteurization” be ok to put in thread titles?

16

UMMMMMMMMMMMM…

How about STOP freakin reading Cafe Society!

At least until yer done with Lord of the Rings… and all the attached readings… that should give us OH the next year or two to chat merrily about Frodo and Sam and the Big…

17

Gandalf dies.

18

Sorry–hit submit too soon–“Gandalf dies” is not a spoiler, but a debateable point.

19

Debateable. The movie cut off at a happy point, sure, the book…not so much. (And I sure wish Goldman would hurry up and secure the rights to do the translation of the sequel. Damnable Morgenstern estate!)

I’m a little baffled as to how “The end of Frodo” is a spoiler. The books…end. (It’s true!) And with them, so do the characters.

20

I really liked the end of the two towers where Frodo and Sam are on Shadowfax and galloping away from the Black Rider, Khanif. In a clever tactical move Frodo leads the Black Rider into a thick fog in an out of the way marsh and is aided by the low visibility. Frodo screams “KHAAAAAAANNNNNNNif!” and uses Sting to sever the ring finger of the black rider. As the rider-wraith begins to lose his power, his form expands uncontrollably and Frodo and Sam gallop away. However, the explosion seriously injures Shadowfax. Knowing that they do not have a chance of escape without the horse, Sam reaches into the wound and removes the evil shrapnel. In a sad turn of events, the shrapnel’s evil radiation overcomes Sam and he dies. Frodo is forced to leave him in the marsh.

In The Return of the King, Frodo learns from Gollum that the power of the mystical march has restored Sam back to life, but he must be removed from the area before he is overcome. Frodo races to help his friend and finds that Sam has begun his 7 year heat. The two race back to the Shire and Rosie before the usual tranquil Sam is overcome by his sexual urges. The books leave it there, but the events that follow may be read in Tolkien’s short story “Rosie does Rivendell”.