My mother can’t cook. Not that she burns things, or didn’t feed us while we were growing up, but I now realize that she just doesn’t make things that actually taste good.
Since I moved out, I’ve learned to cook, and now know how to cook a turkey. (among a host of other things).
My mother, on the other hand, after 35 years of marriage, apparently doesn’t know how to cook a turkey. Her mother cooked it a certain way, so my mother cooks it the same way.
I’ve held out on the method as to not scare the pit members too much, but alas, it’s time to reveal the secret…
In at 11 PM, out at 11AM. Oven at 325F. My wife, myself, and my cousin who is a culinary arts major, were surpised that it didn’t turn to dust when it was being cut.
Take charge of the turkey yourself. Buy a second one if you had to. I deep fried mine this year and was extremely happy with the results. About 50 minutes for a 15lb bird and the breast meat was nice and juicy.
My dad used a recipe from Cook’s Illustrated that called for about 2 hours at 400 F instead of the traditional 4 hours (more or less) at 350 F. Of course we did measure the temp, leg meat at 175 F and breast meat at 165 F. But the thing just didn’t look done. It wasn’t so much bloody, as it was a bit pinkish on the inside. No one seems to have contracted salmonella, so I guess we were okay. So, while I wouldn’t want the sawdust like turkey that you must have gotten after 12 hours at 325, I’m also wanting the white meat to look white and the dark meat to look dark. Pink is a good color for some women’s panties, not for turkey meat.
More chipped turkey. My cousin did the carving, and had NOTHING good to say about it…
His best like was “This thing has no collogen left at all, it’s not even worth making soup with it.” Many of us had a good chuckle behind mom’s back about this turkey.
Yeah, well my sister makes instant potatoes on T-Day! I even volunteered to peel and whip, but she says “Oh, these are fine. I can’t tell the difference.” Well, let me tell you that the glue-like consistency that resulted was not something I’ve found with the fresh kind, and since the spuds and mud is my favorite part of the meal, it kinda ruined it for me. If I want spackle, there’s always Lowes.
I can’t believe that. Surely everyone knows that instant potatoes are an abomination in the eyes of the Lord! If I can make mashed potatoes from scratch, anyone can. It takes about 20 minutes, if that.
I don’t like fresh mashed potatoes - I HATE lumps. And I love the instant stuff - especially with butter and turkey gravy and a little cranberry mixed in. Nummy!
One of the main things that I miss about my ex-husband was his ability to turn a bag of Yukon gold potatoes into the most amazing, lump-free, mind-blowingly delicious mashed potatoes ever.
Ever.
I was seriously missing them yesterday. (The potatoes, not the ex)
The way to get rid of ALL lumps in potatoes is to buy a ricer. Guaranteed to de-lump potatoes. Then whip as usual and you’ve got creamy, perfect spuds.
