OMFG: There really IS a Kegelcisor®

[js_africanus]

And it is on page 26 of the late winter 2005 edition of the Lifestyle Fascination catalogue. It comes with instructions. "...and your satisfaction is fully guaranteed—perhaps even more so than for any other product we sell...."

[WhyNot]

I bet the Kegel exerciser my husband has is more satisfying!

[cher3]

I have this vision of an informercial with Suzanne Sommers sitting on a chair looking...intent.

[UncleRojelio]

Originally Posted by js_africanus

And it is on page 26 of the late winter 2005 edition of the Lifestyle Fascination catalogue. It comes with instructions. "...and your satisfaction is fully guaranteed—perhaps even more so than for any other product we sell...."

This?

[neuroman]

What a pleasurable way to exercise while watching TV, talking on the phone, or just relaxing. Your “satisfaction” is guaranteed! One piece stainless steel construction—sterilize in the dishwasher.

Anyone else uncomfortable with the idea of that thing being in the dishwasher?

[jimpatro]

Not at all

[Jenaroph]

Originally Posted by neuroman

Anyone else uncomfortable with the idea of that thing being in the dishwasher?

Heh. Did you see the rerun of CSI last night?

[iampunha]

Originally Posted by The Kegelcisor

Your “satisfaction” is guaranteed!

Oh my...

[betenoir]

Originally Posted by js_africanus

Why are you surprised?

[NotNow]

Hehe, so this teenager now has a sudden spiked interest in learning how to do kegels. Does anyone have a helpful video or something that explains the process. Purely for athletic reasons of course

[inkleberry]

Originally Posted by NotNow

Hehe, so this teenager now has a sudden spiked interest in learning how to do kegels. Does anyone have a helpful video or something that explains the process. Purely for athletic reasons of course

Well, it will help your bladder. A strong bladder is happy for everyone.

Ok, first, go to your local toilet. Begin peeing. STOP! You know those muscles you just used to stop your pee from flowing? Those are your pelvic floor muscles. Those are what you need to squeeze. You can do this without the peeing part, that's just the easiest way to teach people. Do a couple of sets of 25 each a day.

[The Mermaid]

Originally Posted by Jenaroph

Heh. Did you see the rerun of CSI last night?

Yes

Sure if I'm running a load for my dildos and beads, anyway, may as well toss in the old Kegel'er.

[plankter]

Originally Posted by UncleRojelio

This?

Pffft. Boring.

I propose a version with an internal pressure sensor, connected to a readout so the user can see the force exerted. It's easier to keep up with an exercise regime with positive reinforcement, in this case watching the needle move and trying to make it 'peg'. Or better yet, a digital display with the maximum values recorded, like the high scores on an arcade game.

Someone else will have to invent the "Kegelmeter", though. I don't even own a soldering iron.

[catsix]

Jenaroph said:
Heh. Did you see the rerun of CSI last night?

The pee one? Or was it a different one?

[ShibbOleth]

He he he. Can't wait for a few of these to start setting off the metal detectors at airports... "Ma'am, are you sure you don't have any coins or anything in your pockets? Can you step over here, please?"

[Susie Derkins]

Hee, here's whole set of them. Who knew there was actually a variety of products available for your cootchie-clenching needs?

Ladies, do your exercises, follow up with a little of this, and you too will have a vagina to contend with!

[js_africanus]

Originally Posted by plankter

Or better yet, a digital display with the maximum values recorded, like the high scores on an arcade game.

[Seymour Skinner]

See how high you can get the Kegelmeter®, and then try to beat that score.

[/Seymour Skinner]

Originally Posted by betenoir

Why are you surprised?

I don't know.

[Anastasaeon]

Meh. I have one of those, and a set of "Ben Wa Balls". (yes, yes, wink wink, nudge nudge, har har).

I've been using things like this for years, to keep everything healthy, It's not very pleasurable - kind of clinical, actually.

Hubby smiles a lot.

[AwSnappity]

Originally Posted by UncleRojelio

This?

$89.95?!?!

[Jenaroph]

Originally Posted by catsix

The pee one? Or was it a different one?

No, the neighborhood-sex-party one. Cleanup involved running all the toys through the dishwasher. It was a full load.

[slortar]

Originally Posted by js_africanus

[Seymour Skinner]

See how high you can get the Kegelmeter®, and then try to beat that score.

[/Seymour Skinner]


I don't know.

Or, you could use a specially modified Xbox controller. It could be like a game of Dance Dance Revolution, only really fucking disgusting.

[Sleel]

Originally Posted by slortar

Or, you could use a specially modified Xbox controller. It could be like a game of Dance Dance Revolution, only really fucking disgusting.

They've got it. It's called Rez. [possibly not work-safe] It didn't seem very disgusting to the woman who wrote the article.

I think we're on to something here. Any game designers want to take this concept on? The Master and Mistress of Kegels, his and hers gaming. What's not to like?

[Eleusis]

Originally Posted by js_africanus

And it is on page 26 of the late winter 2005 edition of the Lifestyle Fascination catalogue. It comes with instructions. "...and your satisfaction is fully guaranteed—perhaps even more so than for any other product we sell...."

Will it really make my erections bigger, stronger, more powerful than ever before?

The six million dollar cock

[js_africanus]

Originally Posted by Eleusis

Will it really make my erections bigger, stronger, more powerful than ever before?

I think this one is for women only—but I haven't read the brochure, so I can't be certain.

[NurseCarmen]

Originally Posted by Susie Derkins

Hee, here's whole set of them.

Holy hell. That thing in back. Is that.....A Yo-Yo!?!?!?

Da-amn. I could find myself falling in love with a girl with that kind of talent.

Suddenly, these yo-yo trick names sound alot more intrueging.