I went to the drug store today to pick up three items: deodorant, shaving gel, and liquid face soap. When I got home I started to put them away in my bathroom and I realized that all three items were infused with microcapsules of some kind. According to this scientific study microcapsules are now in 100% of all products I use daily.
Don’t worry; if you use a double layer of tinfoil for the hat, the orbital mind-control lasers won’t incubate the micro-capsules and the alien DNA will not be combined with your own.