My daughter survives a death sentence

Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share
1

We have always warned my six year old about the electric fence. It’s a unit designed for fifty miles of fence. We have it on about 1 1/2 acres, so it packs a wallop.

I have a standing bet that I will pay anyone $100 if they allow themselves to get shocked by the fence twice.

Any idiot can do it once. Your body however will veto your brain if you try to make yourself touch it again. It’s that bad. It doesn’t hurt per se. It’s something different than pain. It’s just immeasurably unpleasant.

We turn the fence off at those times when we play with the horse, and then it’s safe. I haven’t been shocked or touched an electric fence while it was on in over fifteen years.

It’s the kind of thing that you don’t let happen again if it’s a fencer like ours.
So we’ve always warned our daughter to be very careful and never to touch it, and we’ve illustrated that warning by pantomiming what will happen, shaking uncopntrollably with violence, doing the chicken and collapsing on the ground.

Until last week that was enough.

Last week, the seed of doubt grew in my daughter’s mind. Was the electric fence fictional? Was it like the werewolf we told her come and eat her if she stayed up past her bedtime?

Was it like the Mushroom Man we told her lived under the stairs and would come out and get her is she didn’t eat her vegetables?

Why was it sometimes safe to touch when we told her it was and unsafe at other times?

In hindsight, I have to admit that telling her that touching a fence would make her shake up and down like a cartoon character while sparks shot out of her hair until she collapsed in a smoldering heap has the ring of hyperbole and I don’t blame her for her skepticism.

The important thing is that last week my daugher approached the electric fence with the intention to climb in and pet the horse. My wife warned her off. My daughter asked “why not?”

“Because the fence is on and you’ll get shocked.”

“Really?” asked my daughter. “How bad? To death?”

“Yes.” my wife said. “You’ll get shocked and then you’ll die.”

Two things. First the exact phrasing of the above statement is very important. Secondly, we don’t mess around with the fence. Strictly speaking it’s not physically dangerous to a healthy person, but there is an off chance it could trigger a seizure or something. Lest you think we’re barbarians for having such a device we also have knives in the kitchen and let our daughter cut paper with scissors. Such are the hazards of life.

Anyway, my daughter was skeptical and a few moments later she attempted to scale the fence.

BZZZZZT! She got shocked.

She was startled. It was bad. In fact, she was shocked by the occurence. Literally. She didn’t tell though. She didn’t cry. She kept it to herself. She didn’t want to get in trouble with Mommy for touching the fence when she was told not to.

That was only the half of it though. It was far worse than that. Mommy said if she touched the fence “You’ll get shocked and then you’ll die.” She touched the fence and she got shocked, just like her mother had said.

Now she was going to die.

She stood there and waited for Death.

Apparently though, it was not instantaneous. She went around all day under the burden of her death sentence. When would death come? How long would it take?

She ate her dinner and played with her sister and tried to be nice to everybody so that they would all remember her at her best. We noticed that she seemed a little depressed, but she was unwilling to talk about it.

Days went by and she rallied from her depression and things seemed normal. In the back of her mind though she knew that she was a goner and it was just a matter of time.

Tonight it got to her and she told me that she was going to miss me when she died. She told me that she didn’t want to die and that she was sorry, and she broke down and cried.

I suspected that it was all a misunderstanding but was more than a little alarmed and so I asked her why she thought she was going to die.

I got the whole tearful confession.

Now there is an evil streak in me though I love my daughters more than anything else in the world. I resisted the urge to say. “I’m going to miss you, too. You shouldn’t have touched the fence.”

Instead, I explained the misunderstanding and assured her that she was not going to suddenly die in the near future because she touched the fence last week. I explained that having survived the experience she was safe and that there was not delayed action.

I envied her the next moment. Neither you nor I have likely ever had such a feeling, been granted such a stay of execution and given such a second chance. The look on her poor face was incredible as she realized it.

And that’s how my little girl survived her death sentence and gained a new lease on life.

I’ll bet tomorrow those Frosted Flakes never tasted so good.

2

I know your story was meant to be amusing or sweet but I didn’t find it so at all. I was rather disturbed by it, actually. I’m willing to acknowledge I am being sensitive, though.

Glad to hear your daughter is OK.

3

That’s exactly the kind of thing I’d be tempted to tell my kids.

As a teenager I came very close to urinating on an electric fence. Luckily for me (though perhaps not for the story) my friend thought to point it out to me at the last second rather than wait and see what happened.

4

Anaamika

Yeah, it was a little disturbing. I think you’re right. Disturbing things like this seem to be a part of having kids. Once I sat on a toy penguin in a bathtub and it went up a place a toy penguin should never go.

That was disturbing, too.

I hope you don’t feel that it was innapropriate that I shared it.

5

Wow. What a story. Glad your daughter feels OK now Scylla.

I went through a similar experience when I was about 6 years old, only it was my brother who was going to die at my hands.

We had some sort of chemistry/science experiment, with tubs & tubes of goo which I’m sure would be illegal today. One tub in particular was marked all over with warning symbols on not eating it. The contents resembled a cross between Vaseline and jello, and did I say the warning symbols were impressive? Little skull and crossbones, if I recall correctly.

Anyway, for some idiotic reason, I was goading my brother into eating it. I didn’t actually expect him to eat it–he was the older guy, he was the bullier, not the bull-ee. He must’ve been in a silly mood or something. But, he did take one bite, to my horror.

I kept waiting for him to die. I really truly thought he’d die, and my parents would find out that I was the one who encouraged him to eat the goo, and that I’d spend the rest of my life in jail. Lasted about a week before I figured out that if he wasn’t dead by now, he wouldn’t die anytime soon.

It was a horrible feeling back then, but it’s a very funny story now, and no doubt your daughter will see it that way when she grows up as well.

6

Why do you have an electric fence? Just wondering.

7

I have a similar 50 acre charger on my fence, and I’ve been zapped many times. In fact, I’ve deliberately touched it to make sure it was still hot. Not something I’d do regularly, but not a horrible experience, and it stops hurting as soon as you let go. I think such hyperbole will make your daughter question the truth of any warning you give her. If she got off that lightly, why look both ways before crossing the street, why not experiment with drugs, etc. I feel sorry for her thinking so long that she’ll die at any moment.

StG

8

Please tell me the werewolf and Mushroom Man bits were jokes.

9

Perhaps this really is evil of me, but that’s the most unspeakably funny thing I’ve heard all week.

10

I thought that was the way we were supposed to take it, but maybe I’m wrong. I’m glad everything is okay, Scylla, and I hope you’re careful with hyperbole in the future.

And yeah, the “I’m going to miss you” would have been very funny.

11

I’ll take that bet. I’m the guy who, as a teenager, had a friend who had a light switch where a bare wire touched a few of the screws and I would touch one finger to each screw and hold it there until my entire arm was numb and vibrating and stiff. I think I could handle touching one little electric fence a few times.

12

Such things can be awful. My mother used to use a garden insecticide called Black Leaf Forty a nictine based toxin.

I was told never, ever to have anything to do with the spray can (hand pumped). Well, being 10 years old or so that was just a challenge. So one day while my mother was down town, probably grocery shopping, I got the can out, went out to the garded and sprayed some. The wind was blowing and some of it blew back in my face.

Scared? You bet.

I put the can away and sat around the rest of the day with a hollow in the pit of my stomach waiting for the poison to take me. I don’t suppose I slept much that night until exhaustion took hold.

Finally about midmorning the next day I asked my mother how long Black Leaf Forty would take to kill you if some got on your skin.

Of course the whole story came out, I was assured that any bad effects would have long since happened if they were going to. And I didn’t get to go to the Saturday cowboy and indians matinee.

13

It’s amazing what kids can do to stay out of trouble, especially if that thing hurts as much as it sounds.

FTR, I didn’t find the story very disturbing. I got a good laugh out of it. It also vaguely reminded me of my own childhood. I must have had similar misunderstandings.

14

Nearly all children react the way your daughter did. They indulge in “magical thinking.”
Most of the time it’s no more a problem than it was for your little girl.
I’ve had siblings of critically ill children tell me in secret that they were the cause of their brother’s or sister’s, or worse, parent’s illness.
Most of the time the stories are heartbreakingly cute.
Explaining doesn’t little good, most times. They are convinced.

One child’s mom had told the two kids to stop playing in the bathroom sink, because it was dirty. She had just splashed her brother in the face. Two days later, he was diagnosed with an E-coli infection, from eating at Someone-in-the-crate’s restaurant.
Every time she’d visit, we’d talk about how the dirty sink water made/didn’t make him sick. She never believed me. She’d pat my arm and say “I know you have to say that to make me feel better. It’s your job”

Another, was inapproprately funny. Not laugh out loud funny, but…
The sick child was being removed from life support. The doctor, myself, and the parents took the four year old aside to explain what was happening. He seemed to understand well beyond his years. His only questions were for clarification, it seemed. “Does that mean he’s going to Heaven today? Is he going to Heaven now?”
His mom tearfully answered yes.
Then we all went back to the bedside, where the doctor and I proceeded to remove the breathing tube and lines.
The child died within minutes, with mom holding him in a rocker. Whe it was over, she put him back on the bed, and asked the 4yo if he wanted to kiss his brother good bye.
He did so, then stood perfectly still on the step-stool he was standing on to reach the bed.
The mother gathered up their stuff, to leave.
Then the kid hit the bed with both hand and yelled, “So, go!” He had a fierce and frustrated look on his face, but no sadness. Finally, he looked at the adults around the bed, and said. “When does he go to Heaven? You said he’d go to Heaven and I could watch. Tell him to go so I can see how he does it.” Mom, tried to explain about his spirit going, not his body, but he was having none of it. He was promised a show of Glory and he was staying right there on that step-stool, until he got it.
Sadly, his dad was not a patient man, and just wordlessly carried him away still demanding to see his brother go to Heaven.
I’ve often wondered if he thought his brother was still at the hospital waiting to sneak into Heaven.

15

I have children and I thought it was a riot. And if I had been Scylla’s daughter, there’s no doubt in my mind that I would have tried the fence. Seems some of us learn best the hard way. :slight_smile: I’m glad she’s okay and has a new appreciation for her life, her family, and electric fences!

16

Hooo, yeah. I just got zapped by my electric fence 2 weeks ago while testing the voltage. I thought my thick leather gloves and rubber soled shoes would protect me. I was wrong. Best way I can describe it is that it’s like someone snuck up and punched you in the back of the head.

Your daughter had a great learning experience there, adults aren’t lying when they say some things are bad ideas. I had the same lesson at age 8 when my grandpa showed me how to test the edge of a jackknife. I didn’t believe him and ran my thumb down the length of the blade and sure enough I sliced it wide open. He just smiled and said “I knew you’d have to try it, from now on trust me”

17

See, I think just the opposite. She had a learning experience all right. She’s learned her parents are liars.

At this point, were I the Little Scylla, I’d never eat another vegetable or brush my teeth again.

Cute story. Questionable parenting.

18

Scylla–I have reservations about some of your parent tool choices.
But hey! it’s your kid.
And you get the therapy bills, later on.
And she gets to pick the nursing home you wind up in.
Just remember that. :dubious:

19

Poor little thing.

I probably would have told her the same thing. You can’t tell kids something bad might happen. They don’t get that and they’ll argue and argue about it. Unfortunately, you can’t always predict their thought process. But, hey, it’s all part of growing up.

20

The bit about the “I’ll miss you” is very funny–it would make a great line in a movie.

But these kinds of stories are only funny when everything turns out all right in the end-like most movies. Where is the teaching of this kid to not touch the fence? I see dire cartoony threats and hyperbole and a history of telling her farcical stuff to make her behave.

Poor kid. Will she feel the wrath of God or of Condom Man if she fools around as a teen? What’s with the make believe people to ensure good behavior?

Sorry to piss on your fun, but I also find this anecdote disturbing and off putting. Her Frosted Flakes are her business–IMO, the OP should be looking at how this kid is taught about dangers etc.