The problem with these ads is that they just don’t contain enough scary misinformation. What happened to, “If CO2 is declared a pollutant, the government could fine you just for breathing, or confiscate any sources of it they find in your home. You know what’s a big CO2 producer? Your baby.”
Or, how about this:
(As a theremin drones softly, the camera is “walking” in an empty room which is painted a brilliant white, with many white pillars. Voiceover.)
“They wait (beat) out of sight, in the extreme north and south of the planet.”
(A sudden rustle. The camera POV whirls to find – nothing.)
“They weigh millions of tons. They do not reason. They don’t feel pain, or love, or remorse.”
(Three-quarter second flash cut – Arnold Schwartzeneggar as the Terminator)
“They care not for art, for religion, for civilization --”
(Cut to montage : paintings, cathedrals, cities – upward looks at tall buildings only)
“They are glaciers, and the last time they came for us, half the American landscape was simply – erased…”
(Wipe montage – white screen)
“…leaving us literally in the Stone Age.”
(Cut to cavemen getting stomped by mastodon)
“If they come again – and scientists tell us they will – there is nothing on Earth that can stand in their way. Except for --”
(Cut to little girl blowing a string of bubbles. Hold on the flight of last bubble)
“CO2.”
(Slow sequence: wood fire, steam locomotive, steel mill, oil well, 405 freeway approaching LAX, jetliner taking off)
“Some call it air pollution, some call it smog, but CO2, the stuff of a little girl’s innocent breath, has been keeping glaciers at bay for ten thousand years. And as American industry has become more efficient at converting natural resources into CO2, we are not merely holding our own…”
(Cut to before-and-after pix of shrunken ice cap)
“…but winning!”
(Cut to shot of some guy, waiting to cross a busy street, getting a face full of bus exhaust. At first he looks irritated, then thoughtful, then smiles broadly)
“So the next time you encounter CO2, take the time to enjoy it. Breathe deep, and tell yourself, ‘I smell victory.’ Don’t savor it too long, though. Blow it out again, and if you feel like it add some CO2 of your own. We need every bit we can get to fight the glaciers.”
